I'll be 30 in a week and don't know what the fuck I should do with my life. Moved to a new city for a job...

I'll be 30 in a week and don't know what the fuck I should do with my life. Moved to a new city for a job, don't know anyone and have no GF.

Give me a helping hand Sup Forums, I think I'm having a panic attack or something.

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Best thing to is panic get naked and expose your self to children . Becuase yoir old as shit

Come on dude, this is serious shit and all I have now is you Sup Forumsros. Loneliness sucks bad.

bump

>Loneliness sucks bad
Welcome to life where a billion people are born alone and die alone.

Have a picture of a girl you'll never hold.

Have you tries grabbing a glass tube and slipping it into your dickhole and aahing your dick with hammer ?

>Welcome to life where a billion people are born alone and die alone.

How do you feel user?

>wetback

Sup bro.same age fag here. Whats goin on?

>Be me
>Work full time as a security department manager (CCTV)
>married to best friend of a wife
>no kids yet
>bought our house year and a half ago
>live in southern Cali

If this thread dies and you just want someone to chat with if you're feeling down or whatever reason, hmu on my throwaway -->trailrunn9912 at gmail.

moved to a new city for a new job? you have the perfect excuse to do anything you want, however you want. you won the lottery and dont even know it. go out and have fun dummy

People like this post shit like this cause their life sucks so bad its numb now rather than pain, so they try to affect you like this. Dont let it get to youl

>Sup bro.same age fag here. Whats goin on?

Fuck man, I don't even know wtf I should do. I'm afraid of loneliness like really fuck bad. Do you think I have issues?

Turning 30 is no big deal, so don't worry about it.

Find a bar and become a regular. You'll meet to other regulars.

If you don't like the bar scene, see if there is an art center or something that gives classes. I took classes in glass blowing and jewelry making. Met a bunch of new people and found some new interests.

Mostly, just get more often.

>numb rather than pain
I enjoy my pain thank you.
Has been a better friend and company all these years than any of you fucks.

>go out and have fun dummy

I don't know man, my mind is racing like crazy. Get fucking married or you'll end up alone, gotta make at least one kid so you have shit to do. But what if I get divorced? Then I'll be in an even shittier situation than what I am now. Etc.

>I'm afraid of loneliness like really fuck bad.
What part of loneliness scares you the most?

>Dont let it get to youl

Thanks user, really appreciate it!

Mostly, just get *out* more often

>What part of loneliness scares you the most?

I don't know, when I'm like this, afraid I mean, I wanna talk to people and be around people, even you guys talking to me helps tremendously.

I just wanna say anons, whatever happens talking to you Sup Forumsros online helps a lot. However you feel about life and people, just know you helped a random dude a lot today.

So why did you leave your close ones? To pursue some materialistic goods? you're such a dumb piece of gay shit

No.
You helped yourself.
Quit blaming other people.

There is a book called the power of now. Buy it and read it very carefully.

I have a small family, and there's my mom, aunt and my cousin who's closer to me and that's it.

All have their lives user, you can't just bother them with this shit every time you have panic attacks or feel alone.

>There is a book called the power of now. Buy it and read it very carefully.

I will, but is it a BS book tho? Feels like a sales pitch.

I helped myself by talking to you and you decided to respond.

The book changed my life. I also see a smart attractive therapist. You should find one.

only your mom? you left your mom all alone? you're bigger faggot than I thought a post before

>I also see a smart attractive therapist. You should find one.

Find a therapist? I don't know but I feel very vulnerable telling this stuff to someone who's not a stranger on the internet.

Because we are the same type of motherfucker.

Since a certain time in my life every minute of it consists of preparing for death.
Every moment is of value, every moment serves a purpose, every moment I am awake and know my destination.
I am still alone but that has become quite alright, even though crushing at times.

Get a hobby, go to the library or somewhere where you can meet other people, Idfk

She was already alone, I worked in another city to begin with.

youre going about this backwards. marriage and kids are a consequence not a goal, nor are they necessary to begin with. take care of yourself first, have fun, work towards your personal goals and the love (friends/sex) will be attracted to you. main thing sounds like youre concerned about external pressures, you gotta be brave enough to let that go. promise if you do well by yourself, family friends coworkers potential loves etc will be fine with your decisions. seriously theres nothing you can do about being married right now, so go do something fun. actually going out and doing something fun is probably the best way to meet your future wife.

>Since a certain time in my life every minute of it consists of preparing for death.

How do you do it? I seriously wanna somehow brainwash myself into feeling nothing. Stop all emotions and just seek physical pleasure, that's it. I know it sounds sociopathical but it should be easier to deal with than my current emotions.

>Get a hobby, go to the library or somewhere where you can meet other people, Idfk

The idea is I absolutely need to be comfortable with myself. Why am I feeling like this? I have a good job that pays very well, start slowly making friends and work collegues are nice. I started gym yesterday and felt good as fuck after working out.

Mine is office work, is it possible my anxiety stems from a lack of physical activity? But it's not just that though even if activity helps.

>know my destination

What is it?

>work towards your personal goals

I don't even know what they are user.. what are your goals?

Any divorced anons here? How are you?

>How do you do it?
I don't, it's a reaction.

What you talk about is control of emotions.
If you had any control of emotions then why turn them off in the first place.
And that is it.

I know that I will die and that is the most important thing in life.
Nothing else. Everybody here comes second to my death.
So it can be too for each one of you.
Most people are just too busy flattering themselfes with borrowed morals.

I am already dead, this has been decided long before I could've made any decision about it.
So I take this as it is, I do not run from it, I assist it.

"Find a therapist? I don't know but I feel very vulnerable telling this stuff to someone who's not a stranger on the internet." You need to bump up your self esteem. A therapist can help with this. I've never had to tell my therapist deep dark secrets. We started with my current life situation, fixed that. Got comfortable with her then started goin back to childhood pain...

>I am already dead, this has been decided long before I could've made any decision about it.

This is an interesting way to look at it. But can you control emotions? I don't think I can turn off only certain ones therefor I wanna turn off all of them.

>I've never had to tell my therapist deep dark secrets.

I'm not talking about deep dark secrets, I'm talking about the stuff I told you guys, it feels embarrassing to tell someone in person.

user, you know what happened to me once? I wanted weed, I searched for it, I got it, whatever you want you gotta search for it until you get it searching isn't enough until I you find it

Sometimes, it's not us chasing our dreams, it's our dreams chasing us

749301454
Like it says in the power of now.
Die before you die...

She’s got towels. She can dry off

>whatever you want you gotta search for it until you get it searching isn't enough until I you find it

I don't even know what I want. I want to not be alone but you can never truly get that. Friends, family and spouse can all be taken away/leave. You need to find peace of mind with yourself otherwise when something happens (and eventually it will) you'll end up in a depression and never recover.

You feel this way because you have too much time to think about this stuff. Occupy your mind with something, like a hobby. Challenge yourself and you'll see you no longer have these thoughts.

Trust me, I've been living by myself for 2 years now in a different place at 27 and have experienced this as well.

>Die before you die...

What does this mean?

Mostly just get more often.

>You feel this way because you have too much time to think about this stuff.

YES, this is exactly it. I have so much fucking time, but even if I'm around people or family something I'm afraid and think about these things like near future (5-10 years) and stress about it like crazy.

There is nothing wrong with being nervous. Absolutely nothing. Embrace it. Stop listening to that voice in the back of your head.

Can you control your breathing?

Here you do it,
there you forget it,
yet it always goes along.

How do you open and close your hand?
You don't even know that yet you do it all the time.
Mostly you don't even think about it, are not aware of it.

When you try, you'll block yourself. It has to go by itself.
Let it be the water while you are the vessel.

You see this maybe sounds cryptic for most people but expressing it like this is really the only way.

You cannot turn off your emotions forever, because you are not present forever.
Most people aren't the same even for 20 minutes. They never remember.

Try it for yourself.
The rest of your life from now, breathe manualy. You will forget about it, then remember it again, and again forget about it. You have no control over this whatsoever.

Someone once told me on Sup Forums that you can turn off emotions but the downside is that you have to turn off all emotions, even the good ones. And I am fine with that, I am fine with giving the good so I will not feel the bad.

You have to come to realise that you're a fraud, OP. You're not lonely, you simply desire to feel validated by someone else.

you need to get out there, out of your mind, and find enjoyement through the myriads of possibilities life has given you. Being lonely like you are is self-fishly deciding that you're not worth the attention of others. Play an active life. Sport, free-work, hobbies. If you can't purse any, what do you do of your free time and freefom? I guess feelibg lonely.

you'll be lonely as long as you don't change your attitude.

You're afraid you're going to lose control, I get it. Trust me, get a hobby that really interests you and challenge yourself. This will make you feel like you're in control of everything you do on a very real basis. I need to have one basically obsession as well or my mind starts going all over the place.

use tinder, if you have a hobby find some classes invloving it and meet people there. If you like sport train it you will meet people there. If all fails leave me your bank info and kys fag

25 here, and living with my parents. Recently graduated (MSc CS), got a job in a city about an hour away by train so I commute.

Do you guys think I should move out and live on my pay, which should be sufficient but not leave a lot of leeway for saving money if I have to live alone near the city? (I live in a pretty expensive country, I have the feeling).

Also, if we're sharing: sometimes I think about ending it all because life is just years upon years of "more of the same".

>You have to come to realise that you're a fraud, OP. You're not lonely, you simply desire to feel validated by someone else.

I don't know, how do you know I need that? If I don't know that and that's true, am I a fraud? But I really am lonely Sup Forumsro.

>you'll be lonely as long as you don't change your attitude.

Fuck yes, but it's difficult because I don't know how. I mean, when I get home from the gym I may feel lonely. I can't watch a movie because I feel anxious about being lonely. That's fucked up user..

Dont turn off your emotions. Accept them and feel them fully. I think the problem is forcing happiness while trying to push down all the other emotions. Maybe we need to ride out our other emotions to bring us true, sincere happyness and joy...

Find shit to do. Exercise, art, music, anything. Also as long as you help them out and your family is not a shit, no reason to move out and open another hole for money to leak out. Family is important.

>leave me your bank info and kys fag

heh thanks user, I don't have lots of money anyway.

im 32. moved to a different country 2 years back, same story basicly. agter spending a while here i realized i might start using my brain for work instead of hands and now i just wanna save enough to start on my plan and ill go back to my country. thats what it took me to form some kinda plan, 2 years of hard physical (nearly slave) labor abroad. keep yer head up

How do you even know you feel lonely?
You have a sensation and look for a cause.

There is no feeling of loneliness. This thing does not exist outside of your own interpretation.
Aslong as you are held by such assumptions you cannot ever hope to get any control over these emotions, and that is for your own good trust me on that.

Where did you move from/to user?

>How do you even know you feel lonely?

I already feel a lot better just by talking to you anons here, that's how I know.

Because of the divertion of attention.
That is why I said you helped yourself.

Learn from it.
No amount of pain in this world can take a man down who is decided to make this pain his own.
Quite the contrary.

Here you relief yourself temporarily.
Which is alright. But the road is not at its end.

>Do you guys think I should move out and live on my pay

I would say yes, try it at least.

>Because of the divertion of attention.

This is an interesting perspective...

So you're saying I should constantly have my mind busy?

The problem isnt that you are lonely. The problem is you are lonely and your brain is telling you that you shouldnt be lonely. Embrace being alone and doing things by yourself. Go to a movie. Go shopping. Go out for dinner. Smile at strangers. Make eye contact. Say hi. Take yourself out of your comfort zone. Your brain is causing an internal conflict. Stop listening to the voice in the back of your head.

Btw user, you seem like an interesting guy, recommend me some books you particularly enjoyed.

You can't do that.
Try it. The same I told you about the breath exercise. You cannot do it.

Isn't it a particularly interesting thing that people constantly try to do what is impossible to do?

It is like trying to have mountains without valleys.

Anything by Gurdjieff.
"In search of the Miraculous" by P.D.Ouspensky is the best entry into Gurdjieffs "methods".

The man also has an ample library on music.
Here two of my favorites.
youtube.com/watch?v=zreAomkI-cI
youtube.com/watch?v=SOdWvHviblY

Now just to have this out of the way, you help me too. Ya'll do.

Ah, See? You're way too non optimistic
Stop looking at the glass half empty

Find friends live life fuck hookers, pick up chicks start working out you'll find happiness eventually and if you're really into happiness

Get an overly religious girl they never cheat

>Gurdjieff

Thanks, is this an easy read or do I need some background?

start going to social hobbies, join a fishing group or something. Search for ways to find new friends, and getting out of the door is always the solution.
Faggot.

Like I said P.D.Ouspensky, who was with G. for many years wrote a book about his meetings with him.
G's books are for a lifetime.
You'll never finish them until you yourself say you are finished with them.

One of his very own books, his last one "Beelzebubs tales to his Grandson" is a book unlike most books.
If you get into it and spend your time with it you will eventualy see why this is so.

Start with ouspenskys book, that is all the background one would need.

I was wondering, can I ask your advice on another issue?

We are on Sup Forums and this is one of the rare moments where we are not throwing shit at eachother so I suppose you are free to do whatever you want.

3 months ago I met a girl who's the same age as me, we seem to have a lot in common and already fell in love. She moved last year to another country for job reasons (which she doesn't have yet but she's searching).

I told her to come to me and start something here, we may even get married (I told her this as well) but she doesn't want to move.

I don't want to move to her (I have a good job here and the country she's in sucks from my POV), she doesn't seem to want to come to me, but I feel like I love her user.

What do?

I'm already 30, seriously thinking of making her my wife if we get along great but this distance seems to be a huge problem.

All my friends told me to let her go and that I'll get burned by it and it's better to happen sooner rather than later. But I just can't, I feel she's "the one".

What do you think I should do? This situations is causing me a LOT of stress and anxiety.

3 months and you already want to marry her?

Talking about rapid decision making.

You can't make any educated guess here.
From my POV, just to use your expression here.

Learn to deal with your emotions, they are not there to make decisions for you.
When emotions take charge like this you'll end up washed on shore once the particular emotion that caused this is gone.

Logicaly there are only this many ways to handle this situation, and neither one of these I will recommend because it's your decision to make.

An emotionaly and intellectualy stable man can get into everything, even in the greatest instability he will prevail.
If we see we are not that man, then becoming that man is a good goal to have, is it not?

As you are now, your anxiety influences your every move, or doesn't it?

>Logicaly there are only this many ways to handle this situation, and neither one of these I will recommend because it's your decision to make.

But I want you to recommend something..

>As you are now, your anxiety influences your every move, or doesn't it?

Often it does.

Go outside and walk.
Just walk and get into it. Dig the walking.
Develop a feeling while you are walking and keep your mind on it.
If you get distracted then already you notice you are distracted, go back to the task.

Do this until you feel you have enough of it.
Make a decision on your most dear matter.

>30

Ahahaha nigger I'm 31 and own two houses. You're at least 10 years too late to start. You should just buy lottery tickets and cigarettes with neetbux

Me again literally in all honesty your only hope of in fucking your life is joining the military.

>Pride
>Accomplishments
>Fitness
>Lots of benefits
>Lots of friends

Poland to Ireland

Sauce op?

How's Ireland treating you?

Dunno, random image, sorry.

Seconding.

Jesus, OP, I want to embrace and hold you. But you are so far away...

Peta Jensen

I hope you find happiness. I hope I find sauce. We're in this together OP

ffs it's Peta Jensen

acrually not that bad. alot of deecent folk around. not prejudiced or anything. people are more open

Dude. Honestly. Most of us are in your spot, it's all good

I'm 45, run my own business, have a good social life and still don't know what to do with my life.
Think about what makes you happy and stop trying to please others. You'll be fine, I promise.