Hey Sup Forums

Hey Sup Forums,
Feels thread no sadboy faggotry edition. Actually try to help each other with our problems and not wallow in them like cucks.

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>tfw been dating highschool sweetheart for 6 years
>tfw she grew from a sex kitten into a catty bitch
>tfw I don't have the balls to leave an emotionally unstable woman to her own devices
>tfw when I can't justify breaking off this investment
>tfw getting drunk with friends makes me spill my guts on how miserable I am
>tfw want to date again

I just wanna run, man

How unstable, kill herself unstable?

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> Dated some chick for a while
> Greatest summer in a long time
> She cheats on me and tried justifying hiding it as "sparing my feelings"
> Completely broken on the inside since this is the 3rd time I've been cheated on and 3rd relationship ending in shit
> Feelsbad for 2 months
> It tears at me for a while. Every single day, just non-stop thinking about all that could've been said, all that could've been done
> I still tried to stay relatively close to her...
> "Are we even friends?"
> "Honestly no. We're just acquaintances."

Why am I such a cuck that I'd keep her around? I don't want to be with her, never again, but why do I care so much about her like this?

>Why am I such a cuck that I'd keep her around? I don't want to be with her, never again, but why do I care so much about her like this?

Well you can easily fix this by not being a cuck.
>cutting all ties to her
and just move on.

It's hard to cut contact, really hard. I guess it will start getting easier one of these days.
I still love her.

I'm a different user btw

That's way easier said than done user. I mean, I wouldn't let my girl get fucked by some other guy or any of that beta stuff but holy shit, why the fuck am I so hardstuck on this? It's been over 2 months and it feels like a routine.

Hey all, serious help. Possible story incoming, just sitting in my empty tub.
> Be me
> Have friend call her B
>Met B in high school when she was in college
>Shits Cash, know a college Grill
>We get to know each other through a friend who became FWB. Shit was also cash, still hang with her (Another story thought)
>College Grill B let's me move into her room during a lot of crazy shit l, getting kicked out at 16 and needed a place that wasn't the middle of fucking no where.
>B would give up her bed to sleep on the couch
Cont.?

just continue im reading

nice dubs btw

> B wasn't the healthiest of people
>Unstable mentally Hallucinating and literally just cutting the shit out of herself
>No razor BS or knifes, actually just scratching and ripping at herself.
>B's family comes by and lets me know to take care of her and make sure she is okay
>Leaveittome.jpeg
>Fast forward to Halloween, shit was awesome
>Stayed over at B's house at this point practically full time since told parents to fuck off
>Video games
>Anime
>Drinking
>Porn
>Amazing shit
>FWB comes over regularly too and her and B are good friends as well.
> Come time to graduation
>Find out B has a GF
NBD, congrats, finally getting a bit out of her she'll really trying to get better.
Cont. Getting out of tub, actually want to type this up...

Cont.
>Congrat to B for finding someone
>Life moves on, move to California for swanky white people job
> 1 year l8r
>Still talking with B, on and off
>FWB becomes GF and we couldn't be happier
>Get a text from B's parent's
"Hey user, B's gf broke up with her and she is feeling pretty bad, would you be able to call her and see what's up?"
>"Sure guys, I'll call B as soon as I can."
>Calls B
.
.
.
Holy shit
>Depressed as shit honest to the Nine, cannot even function
>Getting really concerned about her overall well being.
>"You gonna be okay right B? Afterall like half my boxers are still at your house?" (Joke, since I slept there for a long time, she still finds clothes)
>..Yeah I guess
>Decide fuck it, get on a plane and visit her for a week to see what's up.

>Dressed like a fucking executive Suit, tie, feels awesome.
>Knock on B's door
>Answers door literally in nothing but panties and a huge ass shirt
>My shirt...
>B "user WHAT THE FLIP YOU'RE HERE?"
> "Fuck yeah! Gotta see how my bunkmate is doing, I heard some shit went down and I wanted to hang out like old time.

She breaks down that her and the GF had broken up and she doesn't really know how to function without someone in her life that she can feel like herself around and she gets lost, like nothing fucking matters.
>She dropped out of College
>Taking pills and shit
>Arms are wrapped up in bandages
> B:"user you'll be here when I need you right?"
> "Of course, you are my best friend B, I gotchu.

..... FIRST MISTAKE

> Best Week in a long time.
>Movies
>Vidyas
>Alcohol
>Slept together in the same bed because "Needed the feeling of someone there."

>Wearing a suit outside of work and formal functions

Why?

R8 my therapy list

My initial assessment it on the 3rd, I think I might have to redo it and put a few notes next to each point, otherwise I'll struggle with what to say.

>bump

Fastforward a few years.
>Started working with company that Rhymes with SmeckwiFAX
>Dream job (Head of R&D)
>GF and I are Fiance now
>Life if looking up
>B going through a rough patch to Fiance and I move her into house with us.
>Slept together ALL the time
>Shit cannot be real
>B's mental state was getting worse
>Stopped hobbies, only vidja
>Found part time jobs but kept breaking down at work
>Literally couldn't function
>GF "Hey, let's try to cheer her up."
>THREESOME
> The next day, GF immediately regrets all of it and is just completely not about that life.
>TBH I understand and am on the same page
>Shits change

We attempted to speak with B about everything and she tries to literally fucking kill herself. Ends up in an esylum with no interaction.

Visited her as many times as I could ... MONTHS . . . after her attitude didn't change and simply couldn't deal with it and honestly, it got to the point where work was paramount, promotions and not sucking dicks

Fast forward to now.
She refuses to talk to me any longer and states that the way I speak to people is forcing my POV on people. I wasn't aware and it took a toll on me which caused me to be more introverted instead of outgoing as I once was.

>Grey hairs
>Coughing
>Doctors.....

Stress... Possible Cancer tbh and all of these things are just fucking crashing into each other.

Guys how the fuck do I get over one of my best friends I've known for years telling me that I'm a pieces of shit when all I did was help her get to her feet time and time again only to be told
>Great guy bs
>Truly honorable

Then at the drop of a hat basically throws everything off to the side and blames me for everything along with telling me that everyone secretly htes me.

I carry that around with me fucking everywhere now and it really has affected me.

Honestly, I love wearing suits.
I have low self-esteem and it makes me feel like I'm something better.

TFW
>High paying Career
>House
>Hot AF GF

Just, I want to feel good about myself but no matter how hard I try, I just can't.

It sucks that most of these threads always seem to have a shitton of girl/ gf issues.. that shit will pass..

it was normal faggots like that who make life hard to live

Understand that all you've done is try to help her and move on with it. Sometimes you can't fix everything user. From what i've read you're a great guy. don't let this tie you down.

Not GF / /Girl issues
Build up to my self-confidence.
Feeling like no matter how high I get, I feel useless.

That's my problem user,
I make peoples problems, my problems.
At work....
At home....
Family....
Everything....

Got my degree to help people.
My career is repairing peoples Credit.

I feel like if I cannot help, I'm literally trash.

How was your childhood? Also any drugs or meds? It will help me to help you better and you will be able to get out of this destructive relationship

I posted this on /adv/ a few days ago, got the response that I should seek help..

fuck man where do I even begin.

For the longest time now I feel like absolute shit. I've been repressing feelings of rage, guilt, anxiety, sadness, depression for years now, and I feel like I'm starting to reach a peak..

I'm fucking dumb, I get confused by everything, anxiety is killing me and depression is eating me up. I forced my way through college, studied something I initially never cared about, now I've come to hate it, so it was 4 years of suffering basically.

I got a job recently (unrelated to my degree) and due to me being a fucking retard (seriously stupid, dumb) and anxious, I mess up a lot, I don't even know if the things I'm doing are correct or not a lot of times (if not most of the times), but at the same time I'm terrified of failure so before almost every move I make, I ask my colleges for advice (particurarly one), which created this tension, where I'm still not sure what to do in a certain situation but I've asked so much shit before that, that I'm too afraid to ask anymore, but If I mess up then that sucks as well of course..

So I feel like I'm in a vicious cycle for years now, I'm completely burned out, just want to sleep all day, but the scary thing is that the job I was talking about is not actually hard ( I feel like it could hardly get easier than this), it's just that it consists of a lot of small steps and exceptions and shit and I'm scared that I'll get fired before seeing through the stuff and understanding it.

But the really scary thing is that I used to be quick on the uptake. Everything was intuitive for me and I figured out things quite fast, so it got me wondered if it is possible to lose intuition due to the constant stress, anxiety and general sadness.. And I dont know what to do

I fucking hate scammers, how do these people live with themselves

How was your childhood? Also any drugs or meds or alcohol? How is your performance in bed also how many times mastrubate in week? Please tell it will help me to help you better

Thoughts and tendencies, but I like to think that she has the guts.
Fine enough childhood, no real meds or drugs besides mild add meds in middle school.

And I had a follow up question, that was

"is it possible to get dumber and dumber over time due to feelings of depression, anxiety, stress, etc for years?"

Sweetie do me a favor take a deep breath from nostril and let it out from mouth and empty your lungs take a another deep breath NOW relax. You are letting your inncer crituc take incharge of your autoself don't go so hard on yourself after all we all are humans and human experience is the most difficult soon as that inner voice goes nuts crazy tell those re occuring thoughts " NO THANK YOU" and keep doing it till it goes silent now I need you to do me another favor tell me how was your childhood? Any drugs meds or alcohol? I will be able to help you and cure your condition faster. Also you are sensitive not dumb there is nothing wrong with taking time hugs also again your problem is too much sensitive not dumbness you don't have attention problem?

a few time when I was little my mom would play tears with me. It was this game she made up where she would say tears and do fucked up things until i cried. i had a really silly childhood, i was shuch a little stupid bitch about it too. she only locked me in the basement once.

thread is dying so I'll be quick ( and thanks for the response)

childhood: Shit. Financial struggle every day, violence on my dad's side, I witnessed him trying to burn the whole house down, and he had a suicide attempt a few years later

teen years: I smoked that fake weed or what for a year and a half, stopped because I was scared that I'd go crazy eventually

I don't think I have attention problem, if it was possible, I'd just be on my own. Live on my own, work on my own, just do everything on my own. For a while, at least.

it was only like an hour too, i think i was just scared because she pushed me down the stairs and turned off all the lights, not to mention telling me the devil would get me if i didnt start crying.

and I also did a few things that make me feel guilt on a regular basis, and got me wondered if I was fucked in the from the beginning.

And it sucks because I KNOW that those things are gone and there's nothing I can do about them now, but I can't stop FEELing the guilt and regret. So it sucks being stuck between these two.

another time she made me watch a whole chuckie marathon on fx. i was so fucking scared of that doll. little did i know she bout a glow in the dark one at spencers and chased me around the house at 3am with glow in the dark facepaint on. i was such a bitch about it

It's not your fault always know and remember that and in this relationship you are the core or glue that is holding up this together but your girl went through hyper sexul experience at very early age could be molestation but I need more info on her. Also listen you have mild depression and it's normal in your case but your girl what you described in medical terms its called SDB= Self destructive behavior imagine a huge hurricane or Whirlpool it drags things down and she is doing that emtional you are drained and we do a lot of things to coupe with that drugs Alchol mastrubation there is no meds for her condition but there is therapy's use these books Self-compassion by KRISTIN NEFF and it will be couple therapy self helped for both of you and this book Rewire by Richard O Connor again it's self help and is only for your girl also be her support in Self-compassion therapy she needs therapy and if she refused then you need to make the difficult decision of moving on because Sweetie you are hurting too much and it's not good for your mind this mild depression can progress in to hardcore depression.

there were other times where she put in the oven and threatened to turn it on if she didn't see tears.lol one time she did turn it on and my eyebrows were gone for months

Sweetie in medical terms we call it DISFUNCTIONAL family you survive that and that's very brave most people cut get in to un protected sex or drugs and it's normal its called coping mechanism nothing wrong with it also No you are not dumb too sensitive to the point it's unhealthy I know female like and do loves sensitive guys but in your case it's getting you and what your father did it's criminal behavior and he was with self destructctive behavior that effected you very much and please don't be ashamed of things you did I have a idea but for sake of your privacy let's not talk about that take a another deep breath you survive where most think suicide is the way out. It's okay you are suffering from swear depression and again it's normal in your case I wish I could provide or perscribe you Zoloft 50mg just for a week but there is still other ways to help your self get these therapy books Rewire by Richard O Connor undoing depression by Richard O Connor and you never got any compassion and if you feel like numb don't worry it's very normal in your case there is nothing wrong with you also use Self-compassion by KRISTIN NEFF it will heal you also better than medicine.

Also sorry to say this but never use any thing synthetic that made your condition worse in long term and you can not drink either it will increase your depression too much I know a single beer harms no one but believe me when I tell you it will drive you Insanity you need compassion and good session of therapy with yourself nothing else once you are heal do all you please but this is not the time

i have lung cancer i'm16 and totally lying

Hahaha nice

This is probably the closest I'll ever get to professional help, so thank you for taking the time to do this.

It's kinda weird though because I'm at a point right now, where I feel like I can do it this time. I can fix my life and if I just work hard enough to Change, and get out of this emotional hellhole, I can make this work.

But I've been here before. Countless times. And failed every time.

But I'll look into those books you recommended, never really read a book, especially a self-help type of book, but I guess I'll give it a try. It's just that I always have a hard time believing them? I mean yeah they must have gone throught some pretty tough things in their lives, and they wrote a book about it, but I feel like their condition was never that severe? I don't know, I probably just feel like I have it worst and have a difficult time believing them. ( might be an ego-issue)

As for using any substance, I probably won't smoke regular weed anymore either, I just want to change. ( not that weed was ever a serious issue, but still)

Also, are you a psychiatrist major or something? The Zoloft thing got me wondered if you are, but the way you type is not how I'd imagine a professional would write? no offense at all, just curious.

Sweetie you are trying too hard and it's effecting you also you can get these books on piratebay or mobilism.org or audiobookbay.nl yes there are audio version of these books too but remember you want change the stick with all the mental excersises in those books for 3o days thats all the time it takes to change I am not promising wanna know why? It takes 30 days to break a habits and I can feel you will do it in 20 also FAKE IT TILL YOU MAKE IT JUST BE WITH EXCERSISES FOR MIND AND ALL THIS WILL TURN IN TO BETTER EXPERIENCE. Sweetie human experience is the most difficult and you are not dumb hugs take care of your self and eat well four times a day in small portions and once in a while take walks look in distant it helps :)

Sweet heart love these books are written by professional by psychotherapist they know not all of us can afford medical or therapy so they write books to self help peace in mind is the most important thing. If you have peace you can move mountains :)

You just got a free session with psyscotherapist :) yes this is what we ask and determine condition and perscribe medication I join /B A long time ago I try to help people who are trying to commit suicide I felt too sad for ivy she committed suicide last week drank bleach with water and she was good girl but too much miss understood and her mother is responsible for her death sad I know but human experience is the most difficult we all coupe including us in one way or another

I'd prefer reading them instead of listening to them, but we'll see. Thanks for the tips, and for the help. I'l probably have trouble being consistent with whatever exercises these book feature, (or just reading the books themselves), but I'll definitely download them/get them. Wish you the best user, hope you're doing well.

You are suffering from a long traumatic experience one excersise a week and always take your time you are human you deserve love does not matter what life made you in to in the end you deserve respect love diginity and if you follow the books 30 days later you will reborn

Although I'm just a random user who doesn't know the whole story. I will say this, she has problems that go deeper than your "failings" (I put this in quotes because I don't see it from a 2D representation). Your desire to help "save" someone is something I have pursued in all of my previous relationships. I chase broken women and I've come to realize I'm the one who needs saving. It's taken several fucked up experiences for me to realize that. It sounds like you have your own weights that you need help carrying and you're trying to take one other people's burdens. If she can quickly go from calling you a good and caring friend to saying all that, there may be something wrong with her, not you.

>I will never watch my gf take BBC
I'm finding it hard to find reasons to live Sup Forumsrothers.

Afghan veteran here. This one hits too close to home.

I'm 22, I've just never felt what it's like to love or be loved.. I live a life full of anger and hate spent at the bottom of a bottle.

If anyone's following I'll cont. Might be an interesting life story for you guys.

spew it Sup Forumsrother, I'm writing mine right now

Anxiety. I've had the same, a lot of the people here have. Just work through it, do what you need to do to be really happy. Pills won't find yourself, you will. Ride out reaching your full stage of maturity, you'll hit it through your own will try alone

>Grew up in a divorced parent household. Parents couldn't afford to move out, so we all lived awkwardly together. They were constantly fighting my whole life so I stayed out the house as much as possible
>Joined the Marine Corps right after High School to get out of the house, and to find something special, have no idea what I was looking for but I signed a 5 yr contract
>Fast fwd 4.5 years, still in the Marines, 2 deployments to Afghanistan, still have no idea what I was searching for. Camaraderie? Love? Real connection?
>Seen so much shit. So much FUCKING SHIT. I've seen a man run over his 5yr old son and kill him overseas because he didn't see him while backing up.
>Never had a girlfriend, never had anyone to confide in. Still don't. I have many friends, many brothers, but none of them I could open up to.
>Raging alcoholic since teenage years. Earlier this year I spent months in the ER with stomach ulcers from all the whiskey I'd drink after my 2nd deployment
>Sober for a few months, but recently relapsed. I need it, it's my only coping mechanism
>Still haven't found what I was looking for. Haven't ever felt love. I grew up in a loveless household, never met anyone that made me feel different, all I know is hate and anger
>Depression, PTSD, suicidal thoughts, all this hate and anger, and here I am drinking it away for the 93423th time.
>No courage to seek help about it. I don't open up to anybody, I just smile and say I'm okay.
>I'm so fucking far from okay

Advice. Please..

Please stay awake a few more minutes. I want to reply but also want to have my story up so you can see my emotional state before seeing my judgements of yours. if that makes sense.

I've been feeling unrequited love for my close friend for about 5 years now. So far I've been rejected twice but she always shows me just enough attention and love to keep me hopeful. She says she loves me but not in the way I want. I got pretty far with her at one point, I even took her on a couple dates but it's just deteriorated since then. What do I do? And don't tell me to stop being friends with her because I'm too attached to just let go. I love her more than anything, every single aspect of her.

I'm up, I'll be up

You know what, fuck it. My life has been ling, there's too much to write. Let me help another user.

I'd like to hear your story too though, please post it

ah fuck, i was never good at green texting but fuck it

>have a friend for over 7 years
>on and off with talking but still generally good friends
>she's a good 7/10
fast forward till last year
>start talking to her again
>start falling for her
>ask her out, she says yes
>feelsgoodman.jpg
>tell her "we'll always stay good friends even if we break up."
>she agrees
>tells me things such as "you're all i could wish for." and "i never want to lose you."
>everything goes smooth for the most part
fast forward to July, 2017
>feeling things have been beoming one sided
>ask her about it
>she confesses she's lost all interest
>being the clingly beta i am, i didn't want to lose her so i do everything i can to make things up
>nothing works
>watch hopelessly for the past month of a dying relationship with nothing i could do to stop it
>she finally tells me she's done with me
>she says "you don't make me happy anymore. you haven't made me happy in a whilae, and you probably never will."
>regret that i tried to keep everything together at the end

i know i may sound like a whiney bitch at this point because to she was considered one of my best childhood friends and when i started talking to her again, became my first. everything just feels terribly bad right now and i honestly have nobody to talk to about it

thinking about it, i may just be overreacting but overall, i just need people to talk to

What's it feel like? To lose someone you loved so much?

Dude I understand you. I have nobody to confide in either

it honestly fucking sucks, i honestly can't say that things wont be the same due to how much of a major impact she made on my life

Just out of curiosity, when did you come back from Afghanistan? I have some friends who served there. I've heard bad shit and I appreciate your service. I would have joined if I weren't 4F.

Do you want someone to confide in or are you not ready? this is a real question that I've realized from my own life. Not that I suffered to your extent but I spent many years sick and didn't talk about it. Looking back now, many would have listened, if only I had tried. I chose to carry my burdens myself. I'm not blaming the victim here but the society that causes the victim to feel burdensome. You went through real shit and people care. I care. if you were my friend, I'd want you to open up.

One marine I know was an 0331 (I believe) and he saw some shit he didn't want to talk about. I just did my best to work alongside him at school and offer some lightheartedness. He opened up to the extent of telling me he didn't sleep well because of the night terrors he got but I also never pressed to hear "how many kills did you get bro?", "nice KDR." People are very insensitive towards vets with stuff like this for some sickening reason.

The hate you feel, the lack of love you feel, these are growing pains. You're in that frigid fucking cold snap that happens before dawn.

How was your childhood? Any meds drugs or alcohol? Please it will help me to help you better

Sweets it's most disturbing most depressing experience in life and human experience is most difficult I give you hug and hope you can go through the difficultly if moving on and finding love again

yea man, especially when she was the only person that honestly listened to me and help me out when i needed it you know?

My 2nd deployment I came back September 2016. I want someone that I feel like I can confide in. Someone I feel enough trust in that I can tell anything, I've never had anybody like that. I'm afraid to seek help because my biggest fear is that I'll just sound like a complainer.. And I know there are many people who've had it worse than me.

I did a lot of drugs.. Smoked a lot of weed, drank a lot , and at 17 was doing a lot of pills

Love it's over repeat with me ITS OVER HUGS stay strong it's not your fault what you did was very normal behavior but it's time to move on otherwise this PTSD will stay stick with you also use these self help therapy books REWIRE BY Richard O Connor and self compassion by KRISTIN NEFF

I'm the first user, the one who said stay awake. I hate that you think people would think you're a complainer. I've had the same argument of "people have had it worse than you" used against me by people who haven't had "it worse than me" so to speak. We're all going to respond to things differently because of our backgrounds. What state do you live in user?

I'm from California, but stationed in Hawaii

alright, im taking a flight from cali to hawaii to give you the biggest hug of your entire life

I appreciate your support Sup Forumsro :(

Here's my story:

I grew up wanting to join the Marine Corps. I was in middle school when I got sick. I grew up poor so college didn't seem likely so career military or GI moneys seemed smart. Also, I loved playing soldier as a kid. Then, my lung function decreased from where I could outrun and out-swim most people my age. 13-14 my pulmonary function decreases drastically. I forget how much but I want to say it goes down to about 35 percent.
>be tall, skinny, and have big flipper feet
>I was vaccinated
Parents think I'm going through an emotional/middle school phase because I won't go outside anymore.
>If I move I can't breath.
Walking to the kitchen made me winded. I don't blame my parents; must be some weird disease or God himself. Some time goes by and my mom checks on us sleeping.
>I'm panting in my sleep.
Mom takes me to the doctor. I spend the next two years in and out of hospitals getting tests done for diseases that give me 6 months to live.
>feelsgoodman.jpg
I find out later that I burned through a pretty large portion of my parents savings with all my treatments. (we had very good insurance because my dad is a jew but still $). Eventually, doctors discover that they can't figure it out.
>oh well, sorry user, you'll probably be fine

>now 16, future uncertain/plans (military career) destroyed
>full of hate towards God and my ‘unlucky’ life
I decide to say fuck it and force my body to new lengths; using my hate as fuel. I end up getting my lung capacity up to ~65 percent.
>not even good enough to become an airman
Doctors told me my upper airways are all scar tissue for some reason (lol they don’t know, not their job or anything). Imagine trying to inflate a balloon that’s a tire instead. The idea that death or another long, terminal, stay in the hospital could be around the corner haunts me.

anytime man, no matter how fucked i am, i always try my best to and reach out to others and support

>my dad’s work start’s to pick up. Free lance pays off. (Side note: I meet a couple chill famous people if you care to know who). (This also mean money for college; thanks, pops)

I’ve been seeing a girl for a wile, old friend with love interest. We briefly become a thing before she leaves me for some gay cunt. He’s the model Rick and Morty fan.

>still in HS so I stop talking to her for almost two years (she didn’t tell me we were through before they started dating). I know this is a gay response but hey, I was a young fag.
Coincidentally, I’m seeing her tomorrow at her sister’s wedding and that could be interesting.

>18 now. Oh no, adulthood. Must decide what to do.
I start community college. Declare Mech. Eng. cause I like math and shit. Spend two years taking the worst times and days. (I literally had class on Saturday mornings at 8-11am for a semester). I end up completing my transfer credits after 2 years and going to very good state engineering school.

>20 now
My closer friends know I was sick but don’t know that I spent every other week being testing for death. The fear of death begins to fade and I realize it doesn’t matter how much I fear death; it comes at the same speed. I have a sort of mini breakdown and start to fuel myself with hoping for a better tomorrow, not hate.
>the sun all come out tomorrow

I be come a little bit better of a person, less dark and moody. I’ve been seeing a girl, an amazing, beautiful, girl, prior to this realization and process. I find out later (because I’m a fag and suspect something; I read messages between her and one of my friends) that she and my friend have been talking about me behind my back and having been at the very least verbally “cheating.”
>saying “user has changed, doesn’t he seem different? Other best friend thinks so too” The lad
>”user seems fake and distant” -the lad
>”user doesn’t seem to open up” -the lad
>she also says she loves him (closest I ever came to ending myself), they’d been sexting sort of
I don’t know if this is because he was trying to get to her or because it’s how they actually felt. I was sick after reading the messages; I felt incredibly guilty because I broke someone’s privacy (I know, I was a lil faggot) but also because wow, all my friends (4 in total had turned their back on me and started gossiping about me rather than confronting me or asking about it).

>about to start new school that coming fall (yay state).
I decide to just try to as quietly as possible leave no tracks and disappear. I just stop texting the girl, don’t really go to visit the bro. Pretend I’m busy. They insist on seeing/speaking to me individually. She finds out that I know from me. Says she wants to talk about it in person.
>I want to sail away

We talk; shit is weird. I. Tell her to have a good life, we talk and then I just tell her I’m done. We stop talking. She apparently gets upset by this to the point where her sister contacts me and asks me to reply to her to talk.

I ran into her at a concert for lad’s band. I’m talking to another friend of mine, she taps me on the shoulder. She wanted to talk, I wince, kind of shoo her away and say “no thanks.” He dad sees this (he’s a raging cunt/verbally abusive father and husband); he gets pissed and wants to talk to me outside. I stand there and don’t move a fucking muscle (I’m a good three inches taller than him and my bulkiest yet); I didn’t say much. Just glared at him down my nose.
>oh the things I wish I’d said/thought to say (L'esprit de l'escalier)
>I was leaving when he said he wanted to talk but I decided to stay the rest of the show just to piss him off

I started going by my middle name at my new school. I also started sailing, ending up becoming a skipper at a local company for a couple summers.

Date a couple random college hoes. One is perfect, younger, fucking A++ hot. Acts all weird and won’t open up, breaks u with me. She comes a lesbian 2 months later
>what a waste

Now I work for NASA on Mars stuff and shit which is cool. I have a very broken trust for women though. Been cheated on/lied to and led on three times now. Is anyone real anymore?

I'm from/living in California. Which part? Also, new user story is mine since you said you wanted to know. I abbreviated it a bit. cause I'm tired.

My whole life I wondered how I'd react when someone close died. I felt like I wouldn't feel a thing at all. Maybe a little sad but no tears. Someone just left me a few days ago and everyone is devastated. The look on my aunts face in particular was some thing I'd never seen before. The worst thing about it all is I cried. Not because I miss him and he's gone, but because I really couldn't feel the same way. I wasn't devastated and hurt and I don't know why.

Interesting story, way to push through the tough times. From the Los Angeles region, Canoga Park specifically

holy fuck that's adorable

I'm from Pasadena. Grew up driving though LA pretty frequently. Are you still active duty?

Well, hot damn, I'm all set.

Still active until June 2018. I have friends in Pasadena, small world