Celeb Fap Thread: Adult Swim

Celeb Fap Thread: Adult Swim

Other urls found in this thread:

youtube.com/watch?v=3TWH8fWU6K4
twitter.com/NSFWRedditGif

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Christina

The good lord was stroking his wiener when he made Kate Upton.

youtube.com/watch?v=3TWH8fWU6K4

The things I'd do for Queen Cara..

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How many of these gay ass threads are you faggots gonna make in a day. I guess betas gonna beta

It's a trap

Still looking for some Emma to finish my edging session

once they reach the bump limit they make a new one, its not that hard to figure out

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Your problem is you're stroking to the wrong Emma.

you're all wrong

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I’m just waiting for the new photo shoot to drop

Would pay all my money to sniff her asshole.

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Look there he goes making that THREAD again. You laugh you lose huh? It's impossibly unfathomable how spectacularly unfunny your pathetic little images are. Where'd you save those from? Facebook? Reddit? After going through so much of your cesspool of normalfaggot "memes" I haven't "lost" or "kekd" at any of your fucking shitposts. I can't imagine the look on your face when you see these reposted "memes" on your cyber power pc you got from your parents. How funny and original you think you are, how you cry newfag when someone thinks your wimpy posts aren't funny. Well newsflash YOU are the newfag. You come here for yet another formality with your edgy racism and 9/11 jokes. You fucking underage nigger shitheads bring your garbage here from ifunny and Reddit. WELL IVE HAD IT YOUNG MAN

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Yeah, ok. Enjoy playing with the feeble-minded, small-dicked, half-men around here. They are omega as fuck and do not even belong in the gene pool. If you were worth anything at all, you would not even find toying with them to be entertaining. I hunt predators. I don't play with insects. That you amuse yourself with the latter speaks volumes to your intellectual ineptness and vacuous soul. You couldn't handle an alpha's alpha. You would be reduced to a orgasmic convulsing girl ooze dripping uncontrollably, and you can't handle that so you wrap yourself up in petty manchild games to feel superior. It is YOU that have the control issue. Those of us who are actually in control and control others all day long in every walk of life have no need nor desire to engage in mere sparring for amygdala control when we can control the entire brain and reflexively have it act on our will without words, and permanently, with far less effort than you expend in your dysfunctional neural calisthenic dysphoria.
Run along, child, lest I focus my smite on you..

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That’s not an Emma

And what's more? I laugh at guys like you. When you cry about how much girls treat you bad, and wonder why they can't just see that you're a nice guy who would always treat them right? I nod and tell you to hang in there, you'll find someone right for you someday, don't give up hope man. But inside? I'm laughing my ass off at you you pathetic fuck. Every girl you set your sights on, who isn't a disgusting pig-monster, I'm going to fuck 6 ways from sunday before you even tell her you think she's cute. I won't bother trying when you finally settle for that 350 pound girl who works at hardees, you can have that. Anything else I'm going to cum on her face before you get those lips near it.
And the biggest reason I laugh? It's not me doing all this. It's the girls. When you cry about how lonely you are? Or talk about how you just want to curl up and disappear, and all that emo bullshit? You're triggering her "Don't fuck" instinct something fierce. You're a miserable weak coward, why would she want your genes? Feel free to buy her a new computer and help her decorate her apartment, you're great for that. But her baby-maker is barking orders at her, telling her to wrap her legs around me and hold on for as long as she can. She needs it, on a primal level you'll never get to see first hand, even if you do get a chance to fuck her. Sooner or later one of them will lay back and spread their legs, but you won't see any hunger in their eyes. They won't beg you to love them forever and make them yours. You won't know what it's like to see her animal side needing you as much as she needs to eat and breath."

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What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I’ll have you know I graduated bottom of my class at St. Joseph's Prep, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Sup Forums, and I have over 300 confirmed trash can kills. I am trained in burning flags and I’m the top windshield batterer in the entire St. Louis antifascist action. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, Nazi. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of antifa sympathizers across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can punch you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with a bike lock. Not only am I extensively trained in slap fights, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the Venezuelan feral cat BBQ squad and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn fascist. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You’re fucking dead, kiddo.

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Thanks for making your garbage post stand out so they're easy to ignore.

To be fair, you have to have a very high IQ to understand mass shootings. The humor is extremely subtle, and without a solid grasp of bullet trajectories most of the rounds will go over a typical victim's head. There's also the shooter's nihilistic outlook, which is deftly woven into his characterisation - his personal philosophy draws heavily from Elliot Rodger's YouTube videos, for instance. The fans understand this stuff; they have the intellectual capacity to truly appreciate the depths of the suspect, to realize that he's not just funny- he is saying something deep about LIFE. As a consequence people who dislike mass shootings truly ARE idiots- of course they wouldn't appreciate, for instance, the humour in the shooter's existencial catchphrase "GOODNIGHT LAS VEGAS," which itself is a cryptic reference to The Flintstones in Viva Rock Vegas. I'm smirking right now just imagining one of those addlepated simpletons scratching their heads in confusion as the shooter's genius unfolds itself on their television screens. What fools... how I pity them. And yes by the way, I DO have a YOU CANT DODGE THE RODGE tattoo. And no, you cannot see it. It's for the ladies' eyes only- And even they have to demonstrate that they're within 5 IQ points of my own (preferably lower) beforehand.

Just breathe air until the demons are gone
Just drink water until the demons are gone
Just dig earth until the demons are gone
Then we can burn fire forever
For the demons will have found their homeIoid wasn’t ready boys aren’t supposed to do that it bled so much plungers aren’t dildos
Children are sacred to the God
Stay woke at all times black sheep
>Resistance is futile
Never gonna give you up
DO NOT mutilate genitals
>This is not good. I hope you realize masturbating and fetishes are stifling to your overall health when indulged like this.
I am drinking dragonfruit mega c
>Celebrating the body form of women accepted
>Modifying body to resemble women for superficial reasons unacceptable
I would cluck her right in the chicken
>This is depiction of chocolates having sex
>I have fapped to worse
This is clearly an attack on our womens self esteem and privacy. I like it
Juxt use your fist
Poor penis enlargement victims
Wow r34 gets me hards
>i love roleplaying
Whatever is healthy
>get help suicides never am option
Get help we love you
I support trump
Love
Trust
The bad guys can’t beat us with those things

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Wew how did that happen with the fishstickz

Nice tush

Yes, just a couple more!

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I'm so in love...

cunny bros get rabb.it/r/bjt6s9

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>Wew how did that happen
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>what a goddess

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Actually, it’s not a meme, kiddo. It’s an artistic protest movement and a simple, yet brilliant, joke all at the same time.
The average faggot who frequents Sup Forums these days sees Andy and his Log of Shit as an irritating form of spam. It is worth noting though that nobody really knows why these people find Logs as infuriating and triggering as they do.
Now on the rare occasion that someone with a shred of intelligence and maturity finds themselves on Sup Forums, they might see Andy and his Logs as a humorous mockery of the adoration some teenage scene girls show towards Andy Sixx. They joke is that they love him so much they would eat his shit, while most other people consider Andy Sixx a cringy z-list celebrity/ scene fag.
But both of these interpretations of the Log fall short of fully explaining it. There is a certain drive to proliferate the Log that logbois discover to be a powerful force. Some say it’s brought on by the overwhelming tide of porn and shit threads (FB/IG fap, Pics you shouldn’t share, loli, etc.) Others argue that Andy and his Log have taken on their own power altogether, and that logposters really don’t even have control over the impulse at this point. Others still have developed such a religious relationship with Andy and his Log of Shit that it is the only thing keeping them tied to this life.
So what does Andy’s Log mean? All you have to do is log in to find out.

To be fair, you have to have a very high IQ to understand Young Sheldon. The humour is extremely subtle, and without a solid grasp of theoretical physics most of the jokes will go over a typical viewer’s head. There’s also Sheldon’s nihilistic outlook, which is deftly woven into his characterisation- his personal philosophy draws heavily from Narodnaya Volya literature, for instance. The fans understand this stuff; they have the intellectual capacity to truly appreciate the depths of these jokes, to realise that they’re not just funny- they say something deep about LIFE. As a consequence people who dislike young Sheldon truly ARE idiots- of course they wouldn’t appreciate, for instance, the humour in Sheldon’s existential catchphrase “Bazinga,” which itself is a cryptic reference to Turgenev’s Russian epic Fathers and Sons. I’m smirking right now just imagining one of those addlepated simpletons scratching their heads in confusion as Chuck Lorre’s genius wit unfolds itself on their television screens. What fools.. how I pity them.
>And yes, by the way, i DO have a Young Sheldon tattoo. And no, you cannot see it. It’s for the ladies’ eyes only- and even then they have to demonstrate that they’re within 5 IQ points of my own (preferably lower) beforehand

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What you don’t know right now is that Andy Sixx is the hottest, sexiest, gothiciest, hardcoreiest, deathcoreiest metal singer in the world and common sexual congress and foreplay would simply not do the job in trying to pleasure someone so divine, so perfect… so… holy, like his ass. Sure one could suck on his fucking dick and drink all of his sperms but it would never come close to showing your love and affection for him.

It starts with getting your foot in the door, which will not be easy. First you need to buy tickets for a Black Veil Brides concert and you must go to the actual concert hall, sneak past security and make your way to Andy’s dressing room. Much competition awaits you from other little BVB fangirls who want Andy’s Warm Log of Shit slidding down their fucking throats so badly. Some of them have killed others to make their chances of being where they are in the heat of the moment even possible, so do not take your presence or your life for granted.

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>slut your way to stardom
>become a raging feminist when you are old and busted 20 years later

>stunning

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he lives on Sup Forums in celeb threads its an open secret that everyone knows he has severe autism his name is herman (not even joking) when he has had brief clear days as he calls them he stated on here that he lives with his parents (he is like 60 something) and has split personalities and posts random celebs having circle jerking sessions etc even posts kid pics etc kenzi and G and jj and a few others....a janitor employed by the website called him out many times explaining to people that he basically samefags the entire thread talking to himself etc .... he thinks its just one guy and a big conspiracy against him etc ...cringy as fuck to watch....u usually can spot when he makes a thread when he posts a random celeb to start it off then posts a shity celeb ie taylor swift etc with a >best celeb next to it then proceeds to samefag the thread etc ....
>That moment that you realise that
>Marinafag =
>kenzifag
>munnfag
>arifag
>tayfag
>selenafag
>stutterfag
>katyfag
>pedofag
>footfag
>g-fag
>RPfag
>elle
>jordyn jones
>pedo gif poster guy
(plus when he acts like multiple anons getting mad at anyone who cals him out or anyone who posts this)
(plus the id suck cock for tay tay(or other celeb) faggotry/samefagging)
(plus underage celebs who he posts then samefags talking to himself saying how pure they are etc then replies to himself being "lewd" describing how he wants to fuck them then replying to himself again telling himself not to be lewd "she is an angel etc" then repeating the last few steps the entire thread)
aka herman the guy who lives with his parents in the united states
now thats what u call cringe...
just a head up to u guys its all the same guy...he samefags like a motherfucker using multiple devices
he is also a regular poster on Sup Forums and /mpl/ and starts most /trap/ threads

back when she was actually hot

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What I'm about to tell you is the truth, NASA has built a device, an artificial sun simulator and placed it in heliosykronus orbit outside Earth's atmosphere. NASA technology is very highly advanced and they are able to cloak (hide) are real solar sun. Are real sun is not white but more yellow in color. Because the sun is 93 million miles away, they are able to completely cover the real solar sun, the device also has lenses that bend light like a prism, but hear is how you can see the real solar sun and the fake sun.
1.) You will need (2) pairs of sunglasses.
UV sunglasses with the darker tint on the upper part of the lenses work excellent.
2.) While wearing one pair of sunglasses close one eye and look at the sun, hold the other pair of sunglasses 10 inches in front of the other pair. Slowly bring the the other pair closer closer to your eye like a telescope. You will see 2 suns. One will appear white, the fake sun, the other will be yellow, are real solar sun. They may appear a different color depending on the tinted color of your sunglass lense. If you do this technique correctly, you will see 2 suns. The solar sun and the fake sun.
This is the honest truth.
NASA explain !?
909762

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HI I'M GEORGE ZIMMER THIS FLESHY FEATURE FORMERLY YOUR FIANCE FLOPS FASTENED TO MY PHALLUS CONDOM-LIKE FULLY ENGORGED FINISHED FINALLY A BURSTING BALLOON OF VISCERA SPEWING GULLET GLOOPING WHITE BILE UPON YOU WHILE MY MAMMOTH'S TUSK VENTRILOQUIZES HER MAW SOFTLY MOUTHING INTO YOUR EAR AT 03:34 AM OR ELSE YOUR MUMPH WILL CAPSIZE INTO THE ARCHES OF LITHUANIA:
"You're gonna like the way you look in the next 124 years, I guarantee it."

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At least she had a hot period.

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Is this how you do it ~desu

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THAT FUCKING HEAD!!!!

Has Cara ever come to you in your dream?

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I unironically believe this.

There he is. There he goes again. Look, everyone! He posted it once again! Isn’t he just the funniest guy around?! Oh my God.
I can almost see your pathetic overweight frame glowing in the dark, lit by your computer screen which is the only source of light in your room, giggling like a like girl as you once again type your little Banana thread up and fill in the captcha. Or maybe you don’t even fill in the captcha. Maybe you’re such a disgusting NEET that you actually paid for a Sup Forums pass, so you just choose the picture. Oh, and we all know the picture. The “epic” Banana guy, isn’t it? I imagine you little shit laughing so hard as you click it that you drop your Doritos on the floor, but it’s ok, your mother will clean it up in the morning. Oh, that’s right. Did I fail to mention? You live with your mother. You are a fat fucking fuckup, she’s probably so sick of you already. So sick of having to do everything for you all goddamn day, every day, for a grown man who spends all his time on Sup Forums posting about a fucking banana. Just imagine this. She had you, and then she thought you were gonna be a scientist or an astronaut or something grand, and then you became a NEET. A pathetic Bananafag NEET. She probably cries herself to sleep everyday thinking about how bad it is and how she wishes she could just disappear. She can’t even try to talk with you because all you say is “I REALLY
REALLY LIKE THIS PICTURE.” You’ve become a parody of your own self. And that’s all you are. A sad little man laughing in the dark by himself as he prepares to indulge in the same old dance that he’s done a million times now. And that’s all you’ll ever be.

are you kidding me you little piece of shit i’ll have you know i graduated top of my politics class and i’ve been involved in privilege checking with over 150 confirmed political demonstrations i’m trained in conflict resolution and i was the most oppressed person in my entire upper middle class high school you are nothing to me but another cultural appropriator i will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which have never been seen on this side of the 49th parallel mark my words you think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the internet think again fucker, as we speak i’m checking with my anarcho-communist analyst brigade for your location so you better be prepared to deal with some molotov cocktails and angry feminists flying through your window yOU’RE FUCKING DEAD CHERRY i can be anywhere at any time and i can kill you in over seven hundred ways and that’s just with me boring you to death while i talk about privilege not only am i extensively trained in hotline management but i have access to an entire arsenal of sociological articles to prove my point and i will use them to wipe your fucking face off the earth you little shit if only you had known what oppressed retribution your cultural appropriation would unleash then maybe you would have held your fucking tongue but you couldn’t you’re fucking dead kiddo

Pretty. But why are you spamming, user? Dont you want to be friends with this thread?

...

I can join in on that

...

How exactly does one get pussy while living at the white house as a teenage boy? The secret service always cock blocking you. when you're trying to run game on some foreign prime ministers daughter the news media catches you smiling at her and immediately blows shit out if proportion speculating that you are somehow breaking international law with your awkward teenage flirting, so you have to testify before congress that you didn't give away any top secret documents to her and are made to admit live on C-SPAN that you've never even kissed a girl . Then you get blue balls from some hot conservative girl winking at you and flashing her panties under her skirt and making sexy faces and blow job motions to you while you were going through some airport or public event, and when you passed by and shook her hand she leans in whispering she is going to diddle her clit thinking about you tonight and how much she wants to suck your dick off, just to fuck with you. Then you try to look up some porn when you get home just to relieve the tension but you just know the CIA is monitoring and 3 other govornment agencies are watching you beat off. Then you finally break down and Jack off in the shower which sets off some fucking biohazard drain alarm and the entire place is on lock down until they can find the source of the specimen and you end up getting debriefed by the joint chiefs of staff about your masturbatory habits and how you almost created a national security issue with your dick. Then wikileaks leaks your search history showing you looked up penis enlargement techniques when it was actually just some click bait you'd accidentally clicked and TYT spends all next week talking about your supposed micro penis. So you end up squirming a little since you are so wound up and being judged constantly and now people are saying you look like a fucking mental patient and you start to think you'll never get any pussy.

I dream about her constantly while awake and asleep

...

To be fair, you have to have a very high IQ to understand Sonichu. The humor is extremely subtle, and without a solid grasp of autism most of the jokes will go over a typical readers head. There's also the writers nihilistic outlook, which is deftly woven into his characterisation - his personal philosophy draws heavily from the writings of James Joyce, for instance. The fans understand this stuff; they have the intellectual capacity to truly appreciate the depths of the writer, to realize that he's not just autistic- he is saying something deep about LIFE. As a consequence people who dislike Sonichu truly ARE idiots- of course they wouldn't appreciate, for instance, the humour in Chris Chans existencial catchphrase "I HAVE MULTIPLE PAIRS OF DIRTY CRAPPED BRIEFS," which itself is a cryptic reference to Ulysses. I'm smirking right now just imagining one of those addlepated simpletons scratching their heads in confusion as the writers genius unfolds itself on their computer screens. What fools... how I pity them. And yes by the way, I DO have a Sonichu tattoo. And no, you cannot see it. It's for the ladies' eyes only- And even they have to demonstrate that they're within 5 IQ points of my own (preferably lower) beforehand.

Great job user, here i was getting hard at kate upton and now i'm looking at nigri's ass

You proud of yourself? It backfired

...

Anonymous quickly slid his copy of the D&D monster manual between his Algebra and bio books and closed his locker door. If he was to survive the afternoon he would have to move quickly. He pulled up his hood, trying to look inconspicuous, and turned around, only to come face to face with the flawless white tabard of the captain of the paladins.
"WHITHER GOEST THOU, KNAVE?!" he demanded, his voice loud despite the muffling of his visored greathelm.
"I was just getting my books, leave me alone." said Anonymous. He felt the hairs rising on the back of his neck; the armored bulk of the members of the Paladin squad blocked the hallway entirely.
"I POSTED AN EDICT BANNING YOU FROM THIS CORRIDOR, KNAVE!" The captain roared. His lieutenant looked up from his breviary and addressed no one in particular:
"METHINKS THE HERETIC LOOKS TO BE SMOTE!"
"NOoooo!" cried Anonymous, dodging away from the tightening circle of paladins. "Leave me alooone!" he yelled as he ran toward the stairway for all he was worth, the clanking of plates against chainmail close behind him.
"SMITE! SMITE! SMITE!" The cry echoed from the concrete walls.
'Somebody heeellllp!" he cried as the paladins lifted him bodily across the school courtyard. At their captain's encouragement they broke into a run.
"SMITE! SMITE! SMITE!" the paladins let anonymous go on the upswing, and for a brief second he was weightless, coasting through the air, until he landed with a squishy thud in the fetid darkness of the cafeteria dumpster.
"THY WILL BE DONE OH LORD," the paladins intoned as they slammed the lid.
Anonymous waited until their hymns of triumph faded in the distance before dragging himself clumsily out, shaking, stained and stinking. He felt he could burst into tears any second, but the varsity cheerwenches were there, giggling at his discomfiture.

Goddess

Fuck, gonna fun either to the one you posted or this one.
Unless you have one last suggestion

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No scars under the boobs. That means she went for the sewn on nipple approach.

...

Fuck. Typed this for the last Mckayla thread before it died. Whatever. Still relevant I guess.
----
I've been here for too long and I'm too old now I guess. I've lurked and posted for 10 years, since I was in my 20s. Dispite or because of Sup Forums and Sup Forums I care more about people then ever.

When I hear she was molested starting at 13, and how there's over 100 cases against this man and that there were people who knew and it was systematically suppressed by MSU, I can't help but think of my young female relatives who are now older than she was and Nassar molesting them and everyone here getting off on it.

I get it. We see celeb threads, revenge threads, rate threads, rape, 10/10 x body part and loli and jailbait threads everyday. You get served up a trough of flesh and fantasy and you can pretend it magically appears before you. A gift from the gods / anons as a never ending stream of pics and vids.

It's easy to forget these are real people staring out at you from the screen. That your fantasies have no place in the real world and would cause tremendous suffering and anguish. That real people exist and it's not just images on a computer screen.

Empathy is in desperately short supply these days. Being able to put yourself in someone's position.

Sometimes I wonder how much of what makes up the inhuman front of Sup Forums is people knowingly acting out and how much are people, kids likely (or were kids here at one point), who see this behavior and think it's legitimate and take it to heart, thinking that is the true Sup Forums or whatever. How many radicals and hateful people have we churned out unknowingly?

I dunno. Old man rambling now. The real world shouldn't be like Sup Forums. I guess my confidence that people understand that has been shot.

To be fair, you have to have a very high IQ to understand Andy Sixx's log of shit. The humour is extremely subtle, and without a solid grasp of fecal matter most of the jokes will go over a typical viewers head. Theres also Andys fecal outlook, which is deftly woven into his characterisation- his personal philosophy draws heavily from Josh Dryden literature, for instance. The fans understand this stuff; they have the intellectual capacity to truly appreciate the depths of these jokes, to realise that theyre not just funny- they say something deep about LIFE. As a consequence people who dislike Andy Sixx's log of shit truly ARE idiots- of course they wouldnt appreciate, for instance, the humour in Andys existential catchphrase Creamy Steamy Dreamy which itself is a cryptic reference to Coprophilia. Im smirking right now just imagining one of those addlepated simpletons scratching their heads in confusion as Josh Drydens genius wit unfolds itself on their computer screens. What fools.. how I pity them. XD
And yes, by the way, i DO have a Log of shit tattoo. And no, you cannot see it. Its for the ladies eyes only- and even then they have to demonstrate that theyre within 5 IQ points of my own (preferably lower) beforehand. Nothin personal, kid.

Fuuuuucck

You're a lucky one. I only dream wierd stuff.

Why do you think she hasn't released any nudes?

Hnngggh

She could have just paid for a hogh wuality titjob since she knew she'd be showing a lot of skin

To be fair, you have to have a scat fetish to understand Andy Sixx's logs. The flavor is extremely subtle, and without a solid grasp of eating da poopoo, most of the logs will go over a typical eater's head. There’s also Andy's nihilistic outlook, which is deftly woven into his songs - his personal philosophy draws heavily from his dad Nikki, for instance. The fans understand this stuff; they have the intellectual capacity to truly appreciate the depths of these logs, to realize that they're not just tasty- their flavor says something deep about LIFE. As a consequence people who dislike eating logs of shit out of Andy Sixx's asshole truly ARE idiots- of course they wouldn't appreciate, for instance, the bouquet of his creamiest, steamiest dumplings, which themselves are a cryptic reference to Turgenev's Russian epic Fathers and Sons. I'm smirking right now just imagining one of those addlepated simpletons scratching their heads in confusion as Andy's logtrain unfolds itself into their gaping months. What fools... how I pity them. And yes by the way, I DO have a BVB tattoo. And no, you cannot see it. It's for Andy's eyes only. And hopefully I can demonstrate to him just how dedicated I am too answer the question: "Would you?"