/éire/ - /eire/

Why aren't you out enjoying the weather?

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Because I'm afraid to get struck by lightning

>THEM

>Sup Forums and Sup Forums will mock us mercilessly if Varadkar is elected
Good enough reason as any to oppose him.

>LOUNGE BAR THEM
How do you lounge bar someone? Hit them with a bar as they're lounging?

Stupid Clondalkin rats

>In 2011, approximately 31% of the town's population is classified as being non-ethnic Irish, with about 12 per cent being of black background.

bit windy out

>caring about what le anglo-saxons think
Wouldn't want him as FG leader anyways. What foreigners think is irrelevant.

>What foreigners think is irrelevant.
Great. No Varadkar then.

Feel like cans in the sun nude lads

Irish people should never be naked.

Enda btfo

Is he going back to Mayo to help them win an All Ireland Senior Football title?

When I was a child I was disgusted by anyone wearing short sleeves, still am to an extent. Maybe the muzzies are sound after all.

Daily reminder that Mayo will NEVER EVER win an All-Ireland.

Just wait until the last member of the 1951 team dies. There will be back to back All Ireland titles for 20 years.

No, fuck off with your shite from the Irish Simpson's fans Facebook page, every time you post something from there it's always shit.

>No, fuck off with your shite, every time you post something it's always shit.
Ftfy.

Miniskirts are absurd.
There's more aesthetic in the billowing of a long skirt anyway.

>go to town one night
>dozens of girls wearing really short dresses
>like really short
>as in just about covers the crotch
I honestly wonder how long it'll take before girls are heading out to clubs in just lingerie.

just had a 2 hour wank

ama

>I honestly wonder how long it'll take before girls are heading out to clubs in just lingerie.
Bikinis are basically lingerie. I suppose it's a taboo from the sexualised environment of clubs that prevents the showing of skin to the extent that can be somewhat justified by the practicalities of swimming.

Really short miniskirts, denim especially, often don't produce a shapely tightness, it just squashes everything into shapelessness.
Then on the other end of things, the trend for very tight "yoga pants" is so mainstream that women are starting to wear them loose, defeating the purpose and looking "trashy" like they're just pyjamas.

>I honestly wonder how long it'll take before girls are heading out to clubs in just lingerie.
I've already seen it. I was working late one evening and passed through the city on my way home. I saw a girl entering a bar wearing what was essentially a partially see-through bra, cropped leggings/yoga pants, and about 2kg of fake tan.

>try to hit spider with slipper
>miss
>runs up the wall and out of sight in half a second

spiders keep your house insect free fagot

When I was 13 I used to edge for way too fucking long. Honestly I think my longest was like 8 hours. It was not a satisfying orgasm.

t. Peter Parker

>killing spiders
why? there is no reason to be afraid of them.

This is why I always use a vacuum cleaner instead of risking it all on a single strike.

The rule of thumb is; the closer to water you are, the more acceptable nudity becomes.

spiders can't even use the internet you fucking paranoid gay cunt
I wish they could though they'd be better company than you on here

Not really.
There is a difference between nudity/skimpiness for practical reasons and dressing sexually though.

>fake tan still exists

>it just squashes everything into shapelessness.
doesn't help that most Irish women seem to carry their weight in unfortunate places.

nudity is never acceptable in places or situations where you are liable to be seen by others.

>nudity is never acceptable in places or situations where you are liable to be seen by others
Sex? Changing rooms? Saunas?

...

>Sex?
should be done in darkness.
>Changing rooms?
the concept of a changing rooms implies that you won't be seen by others.
>Saunas?
I don't think nude saunas are a thing in Ireland.

You're correct that there is no rational reason to fear spiders. Which is why arachnophobia is considered an irrational fear.

>doesn't help that most Irish women seem to carry their weight in unfortunate places.
There are chunkier, blockier races desu. And some that aren't "Amazonian" carry moderate levels of weight well enough. I think height has a correlation to that quality.

>Which is why arachnophobia is considered an irrational fear.
I highly doubt everybody who claims to hate spiders has legit arachnophobia. I knew a guy when I was young who actually suffered from arachnophobia. He was sort of a "hard lad" growing up, but if he even saw a spider on TV he would freak out and have a near panic attack.

All phobias are irrational fears, rational fears are just fears. For example, fear of getting mauled by bears if you live in a Russian forest isn't a phobia, but fear of getting mauled by bears if you live in Donegal is a phobia due to the unlikelyhood of encountering bears there.

>There are chunkier, blockier races desu.
true, but if you're ever out on a Saturday night in a trashier pub you'll see women who look like they were poured into their outfits, with flab seeking freedom at every area of uncovered skin.

>but fear of getting mauled by bears if you live in Donegal is a phobia due to the unlikelyhood of encountering bears there.
now, if you had said Roscommon that would be a different story considering how they voted in the Gay Marriage referendum.

akko a cute

>doesn't help that most Irish women seem to carry their weight in unfortunate places

its raining

At least it's not raining.

Yeah I'm not scared of spiders, though I might jump from seeing one that's just the shock. I don't like seeing them crawling around the place and building webs, it makes the place look dirty. I've never seen a bug in my room besides flies and moths before, which I tend to kill before the spiders, so I'm not sure does that mean the spiders are doing an excellent job or there's no need for them.

youtube.com/watch?v=xWVKzaJc9GE&feature=youtu.be

...

Why is Sup Forums obsessed with that book for the past couple of days? It's not even very good.

>why are a bunch of autists obsessed with a book about autism?

But there's apparently a boy version too, but I've only ever seen the girl version posted.

Most of Sup Forums is male and wanks to the girl. Also there's no full pdf for any of Tom's books, yet.

>Most of Sup Forums is male and wanks to the girl
I'm actually surprised that the book was so up front about depicting the nudity and masturbation. What struck me as odd though is it never touched on pornography or what a teen might be thinking about when masturbating. It was just presented as something that people do as if it was a common hobby, which I feel is skirting around a fairly significant aspect of masturbation.

I guess because the book is written for children/12 year olds who are just learning about wanking they didn't want to seem like they were advocating pornography, which might turn off some parents.

>they didn't want to seem like they were advocating pornography, which might turn off some parents.
True, but the reasons why they feel the urge to masturbate that a teenager might be struggling with (especially an autistic teenager) are left unaddressed. I just found that unusual given the rather frank nature of the book in most other ways.

Now that you mention it it does seem like the book was more about not doing anything inappropriate in public than it was about wanking. Maybe "Tom/Ellie Gets Off" is coming down the pipeline.

>Maybe "Tom/Ellie Gets Off" is coming down the pipeline.

>Ellie wants to look at pictures that make her vagina feel good
>Ellie knows where to find pictures like this
>Ellie turns on her computer goes to Sup Forums.org >Ellie opens the /d/ board and looks for pictures she likes

>Ellie shlicks to r34 of herself getting impregnated by a tentacle monster
>Tom gets off to traps, sometimes he wears his sister's underwear to enjoy the feeling of the fabric

>Ellie knows that she must never talk about the tentacle monster impregnation in public. It is something private that all girls do.
>Tom knows that he must never get caught stealing his sister's underwear again. Tom can't blame it on his autism again like he did the last time.

brazil is gonna fall apart for the hundreth time this year

coincidentally, ireland allows visa free entry to brazilians

i guess im irish now how do i fit in

Protip: don't spend all your time hanging with brazilians at shitty nightclubs like Diceys. Best way to fit in is to integrate yourself with the city, not just live there and continue to do brazilian shit.

There's a ton of BR's up in Mayo if you want to be around your own. Also what's happening in Brazil?

>automatically assuming a hue is going to dublin
hate this city

How come none of the Irish that post here are non-nationals?

WHHAAAAT! I LOVE PINTMAN AND IRISH SIMPSONS XD

fuck the outside world

we impeached our president
now we are about to impeach the president that replaced the last president

oh, and the rival candidate for last-last year's elections was caught on tape saying how he wanted to kill a snitch.

oh i won't, i don't have any interest in nightclubs and normie stuff. is learning gaelic essential?

>is learning gaelic essential?
hahahaha

LOOK AT THIS FATHER TED MEME! IT'S RELEVANT BECAUSE TED LOOKS LIKE HITLER AND SO DOES TRUMP! I SHOWED IT TO THE MAMMY AND SHE THOUGHT IT WAS AWFUL GAS XD!

>is learning gaelic essential?
This is the equivalent of someone asking you if learning Tucano is essential for living in Brazil. Irish isn't spoken here other than in remote bogs. You could live here for 20 years and not here a native speaker and of the few that exists they also speak English.

I was out, I'm tired now

If you live in dublin you'll regularly hear some, if only because Gaelscoileanna are chic with the middle class

Lads would it be really shitty if I didn't go to my uncle's wife's brother's funeral on Saturday?

I never knew the guy and people know that, but I also know that any funeral absences can be frowned upon

If you have any connection with your aunt, then it would be nice to go for her sake.

Do you have to travel far? Are you close to your uncle's wife?
If its the death of someone you didn't know associated to someone you only barely know through a non-immediate relative then I wouldn't feel too much expectation to go but it depends on the family.
I'd probably ask my parents what was expected of me and do that.

>I'd probably ask my parents what was expected of me and do that.
>Implying their parents won't feel that their absence would reflect badly on them and expect them to go

Killed the thread again lads.

Killed Jaggy's uncle's wife's brother again lads.

If it's nearby then you should, at the very least go to shake hands and offer condolences.

Good job.

I never go to funerals unless it's a close family relative.

Might have Gyno lads not sure.

You the lad who lost all that weight?

You should continue exercising and give it more time. If you're not terribly self conscious about it you should see your GP too.

That, or get fitted for a nice frilly lace brassiere.

Might by tapeworms to lose weight lads

You dickheads. I thought I could give this awkward outing a miss.

Yeah this is the sort of sentiment I will latch on to when mulling this over tonight. Thanks user

>want to skip a funeral
>we're the dickheads

Business idea:

Bras, but for testicles.

Is that not what a jock strap is?

I wasn't really passing a judgement, unlike you.

It's just that there are some awkward things for me in this side of the family, and not only did I not know the guy but those that did know and love him either don't know me or don't care about me going.

Hmmm, I shall return to the drawing board.

made me chuckled

I wasn't judging I just said it'd be nice if you showed for your aunt's sake. Even if you don't know anyone else there you do (presumably) know her and she'd appreciate your presence. But I don't know your familial relations so I'm only looking at this as if it was one of my family member's relative.
If you don't want to go then don't go, you don't need us to justify it.

youtube.com/watch?v=ckQQAhYdlDA
Nice try.

>the zimbabwe theorem is not only still running, but is doing better than ever
how?

Excellent thread.

How would that even work unless you have some medical condition that leaves them permanently dangling?

Watch it turn into a Code Geass thread.

>zimbabwe theorem
What is that oh wise and merciful Swissyank?