hey Sup Forums, i want to start a mafia in my 11th grade class, called "The Bluejay Mafia". Basically we do shit for people like beat up anyone they don't like, pull pranks, possibly hack grades, all for a reasonable fee. We'll sport fedoras with blue stripes and blue feathers at the right side, coupled with white buttoned up shirts.
Yeah, it sounds fuckin' dumb, but anyone got tips on starting it up?
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actually have friends
>11th grade
Abort abort
If you can get away for a couple days, go out of state and visit a cemetery. Find a grave of someone age 21 or so. Order birth certificate. Now you can get a driver's license and other ID as that person. Boom! Fake identity.
Now you can get guns and ammo and other toys under an assumed name. Take a "lock sport" class or two. Maybe some other fun shit that'll let you get up to sneaky or destructive activities.
got plenty, just need to convince them and look out for the snitches. already appointed my Consigliere.
select distinct 1 2 3 1 go.
explain to me local file inclusion
not really looking to have guns and shit,though lock picking does sound fun.
little young to be on Sup Forums?
>little young to be on Sup Forums
>still thinks pepe is relevant
FYI, this retarded plan of yours isn't going to get you laid. Being the 11th grade mafia doesn't make wearing that stupid shit and having that stupid name any less cringy.
I don't like Donald Trump...how much to troll his ass into hell?
i'm not looking for pussy you cuck, i'm bored and i want some moola
Instead of 11th grade mafia, call yourselves the triple F, feathery fedora faggets?
Get a job
sounds neat
your cool guy hackerman
what, work at some shitty fast food place and deal with unruly customers? nah.
thanks mate
you gotta have a hustle, selling drugs works and you gotta pay off the cops
there's probably already some kinda mob set up in your area so either go to them in goodwill or just outright join them
good luck and don't be afraid to smash some knees with a bat
well, i know where i can get some of that "special leaf". having titanium baseball bats is actually a good idea.
any ideas on a hideout, OP?
in my cafeteria we have a game room, so that's a possible place.
what are the ranks
The Don-Me. Authority over all.
Second in Command-Authority over all except the Don
Sparrows-Right hand men. Bodyguards.
Consigliere-Adviser. Has authority over Robins.
Robins-Entry rank.
Certain things earn more feathers to your fedora, etc. consecutive successful jobs, or something that really stands out, like defending the entire group from an investigation.
This is a spectacularly terrible idea.
why so, user? is there something i could do better?
wew
well you can't have a mafia without guns so make sure you guys bring your parents' handguns to school
if i got arrested for possession of a firearm, me and my crew do an epic prison escape??
or we just use baseball bats.
You have to kill someone to get started. If you don't do that, you'll always just be a bunch of lame kids that go around pretending to mean business. You need some glue to really bond yourselves together
> Robins
>Sparrows
you wouldn't get arrested because thats the point of the firearm
someone already did this and it was way cooler than your post OP
The head of the gang was a downs kid called "the don" they had amassed a huge gang that beat up people and got teachers fired, theres some greentext of it somewhere, I sure as hell dont have it. It was one of the best greentexts I had ever read
>enforcing a uniform
>"Bluejay Mafia"
Prepare for your worst two years of high school, faggot. The first day you do this everyone's gonna laugh at you and your crew of autists and never let it die
I hope you and your blueball mafia get fucking bullied
You're going to have to kill an unpopular teacher for the publicity. Don't get caught.
sell drugs
understandably, people will laugh. i have a solution however!
my father works as a blacksmith and he has a supply of bullet shells and an oven for metal. melt the shells into brass knuckles, paint them blue and fuck up whoever laughs at us. will we bullied then?
>Hes completely serious
I can see the school paper headline now:
>"The Blue Man Group leader gets his tits flipped by chad after lightly tapping him with pig-iron knuckles"
>mfw i see some autist with a fedora and a feather reach for blue brass knuckles
>will we be bullied then?
Yes holy shit you really are retarded
fuck jobs nigga
so...no brass knuckles?
alright, titanium baseball bat it is.
might as well get some normal brass knuckles and jb weld a blue buttplug to the end
>titanium baseball bat
where have you ever seen this?
>titanium baseball bat
>being this autistic
You're getting laughed at by other retards on the internet what makes you think a bunch of highschoolers wouldn't light you up harder than everyone in here?
they literally sell it at the sport shop down the street
...
why would you spend $200+ on a unusable bat that would just get taken from you instantly?
You know most metal bats are aluminum right?
what if i got the two fat downy kids? hey, they'll have some friends, and fuck up anyone they need too.
(also my bro does boxing with me so i can handle myself in a fight decently.)
Kill someone. It's the only way
so what's our weapon? not using firearms, that will get me at least 5 years in juvie.
You can't have a serious gang when its 100% downy kids (or at all really)
katanas, definitely
Your autism seems weaponizable
hmm, no one i know owns a katana, though some fat redhead in my 7th grade class did. could i just beat people with my fan? how would baking soda bombs do?
...
why not melt the brass you were talking about earlier into a katana
because i'm not a fucking weaboo. i don't even watch TV. the only thing I'll use Netflix for is stranger things.
I want in the screencap
i want to know what the pull out poster is
maybe it's just that. a "pull out" poster.
>kids in school wear fedoras with blue feathers
>call themselves a mafia
>carry baseball bats and blue-painted brass knuckles
>"Will we be bullied then?"
but user, what if we beat them so bad their limbs are contorted in the wrong way and blood is gushing out of their orifices? i dunno, would you fuck with people who did that shit?
>h-hi wanna j-join my mafia?
>we w-wear fedoras and have a blue feather in them
>w-we're gonna b-beat up the kids you d-don't like for a f-fee
>like my t-titanium bat??
Kid, I'm going to relate to you a bit. I'm 18 and just graduated. But when I moved back to my hometown, I tried to start a biker gang. The idea was to have our own little exclusive group to ourselves, and a plan to go to Sturgis as a group. I had plans up the ass for it, and had about 25 people on board. The problem was that not all of us had the money to get everything, and not all of us had motorcycles. I almost bought an old building to use as a hideout. The only reason I haven't done anything to help those ideas now is because I had to abandon the idea after my arrest, and since everyone was going to be busy with college. If there's one thing I want you to learn from this, it's to maybe wait a bit of cash later in life and more respect before you try to start your own club, gang, or mafia. I think I'll start it back up in a few years, but not immediately. Just thought it'd be worth sharing with you, since we both had the same idea.
the girls are like "damn, he must have a huge cock!" and the guys are like "oh god, i hope he doesn't beat me up with his mafia!!"
right user???
O R I F A C E S
Dude, you are so edgy, it hurts.
OP, post a picture of yourself. If you look like someone who could pull it off, then maybe we'll give you decent advice.
How about not being a fedora wearing faggot?
I bet you're a faggot who wears a sons of anarchy leather cutoff and rides a rebel 250.
with or without the guy fawkes mask
Without
I don't watch Sons of Anarchy. Leather is for try-hards. Denim is the shit. I don't have a motorcycle yet. I kind of just wanted to get a name for a club before some other douchedick does. I also just wanted to start a clique exclusively to I and my friends.
If your school have a band you should be able to get some good makeshift weapons from the percussion section (drumsticks can be thrown and used to beat along with various mettle rodes and things) and running gambling / betting at lunch and shit also drop the fedoras and the bird theming it’s gay as fuck
Without
Did you clear this whole idea with your mom yet?
Don shithead eat a bag of Dicks
I don't live with my mom. I live a state away from her.
Best Marine General impression
>Bluejay Mafia
>fedoras with blue feathers
>hack grades
>blue brass knuckles
>titanium baseball bats
>soda bombs
>being edgy
>guy fawkes thread
>mfw this thread
lol, reminds me of that faggot from last year who wanted to start a "guild" on Sup Forums called
>shad0w guild
Everytime people laughed at him he'd always reply in caps lock at ppl to gtfo of his thread
But in all seriousness, you seem to be lacking alot of street knowledge and life experiences to be coming up with ass backwards retarded idea
You do realize that a clan, gang, mafia, brotherhood, [insert fuck knows term that people would use] has always a main objective and it always has something to do with criminal activities that pays a shitload which in turn links you to bigger network of criminals dealing business and have your crew be badass enough that no one even thinks looking into what you guys are up to
All you're trying to tell us is that not only you're a fucking lame joke for all us to laugh at but you don't even have a slight idea of why you're even doing this other than project an image of something you're not
Be real dude, this is fucking retarded and you should simply not consider this option unless you want to be a retard and waste valuable time you could invest on yourself to better yourself
Nothing against people doing criminal shit but have in mind that it requires a great deal of self knowledge and pretty much knowledge in general coupled with some genuine reasons other than trying to come off as some edgy scary dumbshit
My fucking sides are in orbit
ok, i guess i should be honest. i want the money to pay for my cousins medical bills and the old lemonade stand trick hasn't worked. just thought i could raise some funds and have fun doing it, but if i look like a total dumbass then maybe it isn't a good idea
Someone please archive this thread for future reference
Bats doesn't take kindly to stealing his robins
You couldn't just ask the school to help start a fundraiser, or charity?
Sell drugs, no money in weed anymore so just sell psychedelics
it's a charter school so they don't have much to begin with
Nigga, use GoFundMe
>Sparrows
>Robins
>Blue brass knuckles
>Striped fedoras
>STRIPED
tried five times, no one cares
You realize that most people who buy and use drugs try to avoid directly going through organized crime groups as much as possible; it's risky. But your idea is also autistic as fuck, so they'll stay away from you because your operation would be a total joke. The only way you would have any success with this sort of thing is if you got the other dealers to stop selling.
>guize, i wanna start a mafia at my high school
>we'll wear liek sooper duper cool fedoras with blue feathers and i came up with this sooper badazz ranking system cause i'm such a mastermind motherfucker
>we'll rock titanium bats and brass knuckles from my daddy's
>we will 1337 h4x0r poeple who deserve it and offer it as a service
>we will pull primary school pranks just for the LOLz
>we will call ourselves the blue jays cause we're soo cool you guize
That's how you sound
If you wanna help so bad pay for your medical bills, try to start selling weed and gradually start selling pills and cocaine when you get more clientele and some legit hardasses to back you up if shit hits the fan
If you go down that path, you'll earn some serious money if you're not a retard and act intelligently
Also, going down that path will lead you to meet some people with whom you'll do business and from there, the further you go, the more hardcore it gets and you reach a point of no return
Then with all the life experience you will have gathered, you'll cringe fucking hard of this thread i'm actually wasting my time on
This. I used to buy a sheet of RCs for 37.00 and sell for 1k
Have your blue Jew mafia buy sheets off you for 500 a pop and sell it to their friends for 10 a hit.
I get a gram of deems for 80 and sell it off for 20 a point, and I'm younger than this kid. OP I would kick your ass mercilessly if you tried a fucking bird mafia with your downy friends where I come from.
You're not getting the word out properly. Launch it onto a local news network. Make social media posts. Anything to get the word out.
You should start selling 25b. You get higher margins and it's a more durable chemical
My Experience is rc is harder to push. Deems is rare here and its got a decent demand, small return market but the ones that come back come back every 1st and 15th
...
Is Sup Forums Really this stupid these days? Ffs this is obvious bait.
Wake up, America.
how did you obtain an image of our mascot?