Well Sup Forums. Who has considered suicide, and why?

Well Sup Forums. Who has considered suicide, and why?

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I'd tried to do this a few times, for no reason.

>666
Well, someone has to kill themselves tonight after this.

16at the time and a rotten piece of shit looking for easy way out..
10/10 happy i didnt, life is FUCKING AWESOME (21 now)

No edge here. Regular thought process for me, minimum of at least once a day since the age of ten (23 now). Tried once a year ago. Shotgun, don't remember why i didn't. On the bright side, pretty awesome PC setup at this point.

Huh. Guess people recover from it. I ironically never thought about killing myself until I turned 21.

I am 23 now, and life just doesnt seem worth all the fucking hassle. Been curious about other peoples experiences though.

On a real note though, what makes it a hassle to you?

Well, the world is on fire and instead of putting it out everyone just wants to bitch about who started the fire.

I have depression. I was on anti depressants, and they worked for awhile. I just randomly stopped them when I felt like they werent doing anything anymore and never cared enough to talk to my doctor about it.

People I went to school with are starting families and I am up at 3am on fucking Sup Forums.

I feel like my life has no direction, and I dont care enough to really fix it or anything. Idk, it is weird.

Btw I am not one of those >muh depression muh anxiety fags I actually have been diagnosed with it.

I feel like the only reason I dont is because I could miss some next generation memes that bring me joy for no fucking reason.

I hear ya, but you have to see the world has always been shit OP. Its just new shit every year, sometimes its spicy shit. My parents tried to put me through psycho therapy (lasted one session lol) and put me on anti depressants. AD are fucking trash. You're 23, you don't need to be going anywhere right now. You were born in a generation of free fall. So just fall but enjoy yourself while you do, but not recklessly OP. Those fags starting "families" will either divorce at some point because their parents shoved it down their throat or they fucked up and just got pregnant cause the're fucking retarded and don't want to look like idiots. Free fall OP, that's this generations job until the generation before us dies off. Get a job you like, buy the things you like and do whatever the fuck you like. Life is a fucking adventure not a journey from one end to the next. Enjoy yourself OP shits hazardous but can be exciting even with shitty feelings.

Depressed most of my life between 12 and 16, hate everyone and think the world is against me like a faggot. Got really bad junior year at HS (I was 15) dont even remember reasons but i was home alone and figured if i was dead i wouldnt be sad anymore and swallowed half a medicine cabinet. My dad came home and i got a stomach pump at the hospital, then was at inpatient for a couple weeks. One day months later I just stopped giving a shit about myself or what anyone thinks so now i just make memes

Literally every day. Not even when I'm down or depressed, but when I think clearly. So far I think that paying someone to procure me a lethal dose of phenobarbital. Everything else is too messy, difficult or painful. Nobody wants extra agony, geez.

That is some of the best advice I have gotten in a long time. Thanks.

Damn dude. How old are you now?

I feel ya on that.

Been dealing with this shit a long time. Been in a pit of depression many times. Gotta take that advice and be aggressive against your days. Not pissed off but just aggressively attack your days like its a fucking fist fight. Glad it was somewhat helpful.

Mostly I've considered it because i'm extremely dissatisfied with my life. I should have joined the army and done something useful with myself. I'm intelligent but I want to do something good for the world not just for myself. I'm stuck in a rut of trying to do well for myself now, NEET, in debt, alcoholic, confused about medications and treatments. Now I seem to fail at everything I try to do to get on my feet. Even picking up a shitty job. For some fucking reason it just never works out.
I've never attempted but I did get *this* close to putting a gun to my head. Turns out I was too afraid of death to pull the trigger. It would have jammed anyway.
I was far too afraid of what's on the other side. Now I just suffer day to day and continually try to quit drinking.

I agree with you wholeheartedly on how to live life, "freefalling" and such. But I'm curious why you say this generation in particular is meant to freefall... what's your rationale for saying that? Why this gen rather than others?

Yikes. I do fine at my job because I can put on a good facade by acting hyperactive. Fake it til you make it, I guess.

I have been afraid to drink or try drugs because not only does addiction run in my family on both sides, but with how shitty I feel most of the time I could easily see myself becoming addicted.

My dad always told me in the case I ever did become an alcoholic/addict. An alcoholic isnt going to stop until they want to. Like, when you reach a point of disgust with yourself beyond anything you ever thought you would. And even then, it isnt easy. You still want it, but you dont want it more.

He also recommended eating a shitload of candy to fight cravings.

Because we were born at a point where we couldn't enjoy what the previous generation was forcing us to enjoy, we've been caught in a loop of fuck ups due to past generations and rapidly growing technology. We couldn't enjoy anything really, our generation bonds over depression and fucked up memes, i mean just look at this shit. We cant enjoy anything until the previous fuck ups die out which leaves us in a free fall. Things are slowly patching themselves to our gen and the next gen. Like fuck, i cant get a loan for a business without a fucking angel investor because the previous gen fucked that up for us. Just a long list of fuck ups and rapidly growing tech we use every day were now left conflicted with leaving us in that state of depression requiring us to free fall and just simply enjoy what the fuck we want to do. I know im fucking up spelling somewhere and repeating myself but im tired and dgaf.

vocaroo.com/i/s0sQtsJzx8fH
-Koi

between cycles in the past, I binge on soda with lots of caffeine and dump gobs of sugar in my coffee. better than nothing i guess. sometimes I take a shit load of tylenol too. calms down your emotions. never gone over "daily max dose" though. I like how you say 'dont want it more.' I'll try to keep that in my mind, thanks user

pic related it's me

made me smile thanks

makes sense, basically

>baby boomers fucked it all up for us
>all this crazy new technology no one knows how to react to, and we're stuck at the heart of the change

I feel like the internet has not only caused this nihilism, but it allows it to grow and grow, because nihilistic thought really is contagious.

Hell, I wouldn't even be familiar with many philosophical concepts that define my worldview and actions (hedonism, nihilism, antinatalism... etc.) if it weren't for the internet allowing me to find this info and others who agree so easily.

also keep on doki-posting pls

i really enjoyed the game and all the different paths but the Sayori arc hit me hard

There ya go, you're getting it. Only part i enjoy about all this bullshit is the technology and science honestly. My addiction to technology keeps me going.

True. We dont need to search for anything in life. Most knowledge is just a click away. The stuff that isnt known is hard to get into, so it is discouraging.

vocaroo.com/i/s09i9pjzoeqG
-Koi

attempted suicide awhile ago, posted pictures actually while i was doing it.

my knife wasn't really sharp enough though so i lived, maybe if i had a cleaver at the time i could have done it right.

the game made me uncomfortably introspective (im already way too introspective normally) for quite a few days

it really fucked with my head. it was far too relatable for me, that's why it fucked with me so hard. Brought to the surface many problems that I had either gotten rid of, thought I had gotten rid of, or just buried away

should have taken that psych horror tag more seriously I guess

Sayori arc almost made me cry, iirc

Had to take off my headset and leave PC multiple times during act 2, the distorted visuals and audio made me so goddamn uneasy

10/10

also Sayori best girl, fuck Monika

Because people are garbage and the

only here to bump this vn. its a good one.

Its the flickering that got me. Combined with the soundtrack, the flickers and blinks every now and then fucked with my head for days

Im failing school and just feel absolute miserable overall, tried to overdose before but survived.

I'm also glad to be able to take part in all this, but at the same time we all have to question if we'd be better off without all the shit the internet shovels into our brain. Guess there's no point in worrying about it since it's impossible to remove now, but it's certainly interesting to ponder.

Personally for me I keep going with the goal to travel and see the entire world, not literally in its entirety of course. I've recently found that experiencing foreign places and being forced to have human connections (even small ones, im not really used to that whole thing) is great. Wandering for 15 miles in 1 day in a totally foreign city using nothing but your mind and your surroundings is truly liberating.

I'll probably keep chasing that feeling until it gets boring. Luckily the world is huge so it should last a while, I guess.

>We dont need to search for anything in life

i disagree... if all we're talking about is knowledge then yeah, you're right. but there's so many things, on a personal level, to discover and explore just without leaving your desk chair


do you regret the attempt? wish it would have been more than an attempt? how'd you feel immediately afterward?

I agree.

Sayori was so relatable it kind of, hurt to watch it? And after... well. I wont spoil it for anyone who doesnt know, but it really shook me. Like, how many more shit days would it take for me to get to that point?

the usage of distorted visuals and audio really made the entire experience so much more intense. The theme of depression, suicide, etc. was already heavy but that horror element, combined with a feeling of uncertainty and dread that anything could happen... fucked me up

also posted wrong doki :

ive tried 5 ties the past year 40 times in my life ive tried hanging oding on multiple things electrocuting myself and the list goes on but im still here ;( feels bad man

...

agreed. Sayori was built up to be immensely lovable, then on top of that immensely relatable... and then BOOM.

A lot of the feelings she described were things that I had experienced and not even realized until playing ddlc

I just played that game... Honestly was fucking terrifying.

I spent over 7 hours on it.. .and still dono what happens next

i tried for a different reasons but as i go on the reasons have stacked the first was when my only friend got hit by a bus and died

Holy shit. What brought that on?

didnt see the and why until after i posted

I may perceive this kind of thing differently than most, but I wasn't disturbed and didn't feel weirded out by any part of the game. I mean I'm not diminishing the effects or anything but during the second part I just sat there laughing at all of the weird shit. I saw the absurdity and laughed in enjoyment at how well done the absurdity was made.

Life is boring and I feel unfulfilled in every way

My favorite was Natsuki. Of all the girls, she was the one I liked the most.

this is probably a normal reaction for anyone who wasn't just completely immersed in it

for me it hit me so hard because I was 100% immersed and not even taking the time to realize i was just looking at some pixels

also when it's so relatable it becomes much much more "real" to you personally. That definitely helped envelop me in the characters' plight

Yeah. I just kind of coped with my depression for awhile and it just kind of, was a part of my normal life. It was bad, but it became normal. Then it just, kind of brought it back up and reminded me it isnt and it got worse lately.

your friend would want you to live!

Well everyones different i suppose. I sat there half fucking terrified but if you thought it was amusing well... Its one way to perceive it

Yeah same

That is tough. I hate when something big happen that brings you down, and so many little small things stack up on you while you are trying to process the big thing.

well someone does after 40 separate attempts probably the Jews for my money

same. I haven't really felt depressed in a while, thakfully, but ddlc definitely brought a lot of that pain back for me for a short time.

if I can give advice... don't just bury and accept it.

imo personal problems are only completely solved via head-on confrontation. it can and will be really painful, and most of all uncomfortable, to 1v1 the shitdemons in your headspace, but i believe it's worth it.

feel free to ignore that. I know how useless that advice is to someone w/ depression. Maybe it will help someone though.

I wasnt so much terrified as well....

I felt like my depression went super saiyan on me while I sat there crying.

yeah ive evened out now but i could probably try again if pushed into it that or turn psycho also i have flat lined and there is nothing beyond life so there is no reason to fear really now im still alive to see some anime come to a close after that who knows

I have, my gf broke up with me. I felt guilty, I felt nobody could ever love me anymore like she did, I felt that nobody could replace her and I felt like the future I was building was meaningless if I were to be alone. Over two years have passed. I don't think suicidal thoughts anymore. I am stable and I found another partner who is even better.

Well, I got a lot of helpful advice in this thread. I am taking note of everything and hopefully I can idk, make changes to myself and my surroundings.

I went the natsuki route but felt genuinely guilty for letting sayori die. I felt like I had failed her in some way, like how I feel with alot of people irl. It hit something deep

you don't have to find peace and joy to be able to help people by speaking to those who are also struggling with suicidal tendencies. Think of how much personal value you can help others find in themselves. Isn't that worth living for?

I went the Sayori route first because I felt like it was the default way you were supposed to go.

Yeah, no matter what you do it always happens.....

And like, I thought how it would work, is something happens to the girl you pick, but it is always Sayori. So like, I was picking Natsuki and just praying in the back of my mind nothing would happen to her because I liked her character so much.

>mfw this turned into doki thread

Yep theres no other way. Thats one of the worst parts, knowing that you cant do anything to change it

yes i am a fountain of knowledge but it does not mater how much knowledge i possess for in the end i cannot pass it on to anyone for they are to simplistic to understand and so walk right into a situation that i try to help them get out of also a good 85 to 90% of people have negative brain cells and as such are basically monkeys

I havent even played Yuris route because I dont think I can handle another play through.

Me. And it seemed easier when nothing else worked and people disliked me. Tried to with a car accident and a knife, but didn't die in either instance.

Exactly my feelings as well. Hoping that everyone would be ok no matter what I did

Yup, sorta.

We are still talking about depression and suicide, but I guess the two go hand in hand with Doki.

I'm a professor and a Title IX complaint was made about me. I've been working my ass off for over a decade to make a career and my career is now over.

I might still do it. I might staple the Title IX complaint to my chest and jump off of a campus building. Maybe having to explain that will start to show that schools can't do this anymore. I doubt it though. They'll just paint me as a rapist and a white male and that will be the story. I'm crazy, and that's why I killed myself, and to make it worst, I'm a rapist.

I didn't rape anyone. I didn't even ask a girl out. I didn't even make a joke. I waved at someone.

did anyone else think the Literature Club was just a big metaphor for life? a lot of lines in the game pointed me to that interpretation

Rough man. We live in a society where men are guilty until proven innocent, it aint fair but there aint much we can do about it.

Well. OP is going to bed.

Thanks for a wonderful thread and the wonderful advice I got. Hopefully you guys can still talk to eachother but I am about to pass out.

Pretty much

bye user

also good job leaving with a triggering image

hang in there profanon. clearly you can be successful at anything you set your mind to even if it means no longer pursuing your career.

I will. I don't really have a choice, but the fantasy gives me a lot of satisfaction. Like the school would have to explain it. The student would have that on her conscience and maybe that would make a bit of difference. Would she really be so misguided as to take pride in my death rather than go, "You know, maybe people who work hard at their jobs take them more seriously than any level of offense a normal, sane, rational person would take in that situation."

well, at least you can now quit using your time to educate entitled libshits and use it to make bank and become a hedonist.

or you can just play vidya all day.

Yeah I think a major part of it had to do with the fact that I could not relate at all to the characters in the story, or what was going on. For me I was viewing it as pure entertainment. That is probably it.

perhaps on the side of your new route, you can bring light to the disgusting way that women sometimes treat innocent men. Even against all odds, the fire rises
I'll vouch for you and others that are wrongly accused. you dindu nuffin

For sure. My advice to someone I recommended it to was to make an effort to become fully immersed. Without it the game probably is just shit, I assume, and your testimony seems to back that up.

still am going to read all the other routes... but they all kinda end up being the same. the outcome being the same that is. not really a spoiler, as much as just... I hope it doesn't disappoint you