Foods to fuck thread?

Foods to fuck thread?
Already fucked a bagel and it was great. Wanna try watermelons but it seems like a lot of prep work and cleanup; worth it? Any other suggestions? Thanks

Nigga what is wrong with you

Im thinking roasts... Lite oven cooked.

I know black people don’t use Sup Forums, stop appropriating their culture and grab a bagel microwave it for like 10 second out some butter around the hole and relax my dude

what the fuck user

>lots of prep work and cleanup
Just get a woman. Same thing.

Have one, they get boring

Genuinely surprised the degenerates here have zero suggestions.

Kiwi. Just one that's a little soft.

Cut open one end. Scoop it out with a spoon just a little. Make sure you cut away the brown hairy around the hole too, that shit stings.
Heat it in the microwave for ten seconds.

And now you have a perfect mouth. Stick your dick in it that hole, feels exactly like a blowjob. You've gotta go slow on it, otherwise you rip it up, but fuck it feels great. I usually hold it in place against something and slowly grind it, like I said, exactly like a mouth, cumming in it is amazing af

Your homework is to try it and report back to me.

Alright user here's a suggestion but you gotta timestamp this

get a very large pickle, make a hole and put your dick on it

but it has to have Rick's face on it

Ripe mango. Remove the seed and fuck it.
Alternatively, shove an unripe mango up your arse.

Ham sandwich extra mayo

How do you think fucking lettuce would feel

Thanks I’ll try this

Stick an over-lubed cucumber in your ass, that made me cum so hard

Pretty well versed in anal play, mostly looking for suggestions of things I can stick my pee pee in to make the fun cream come out

OP, I think you need to have a sit down and think about the direction your life is taking.

I've successfully fucked a peach before. You'll end up shredding it though.

I've heard meat, like raw steak warmed up feels pretty similar to pussy. Might have to give it a try.

This should have a nice, meaty feels. Just the right mix of slippery and sticky.

If you actually do this, plz post pic. I need a good laugh.

That reminds me got a whole lot of sliced ham that is just a day or two old. Gonna lube it up and give it a try when I get home.
Usually best to put something like that in between mattresses. Holds it in place, you can pretend you are fucking a chick from behind. Tend to come pretty quick

Does this count as necrozoophilia?