Green text story time:

green text story time:
All I wanted was a ride to the airport.

Part I:
Hello anons, I am a 32 yo engineer with a modest middle class house and income. I work in a office with about 50/50 men to women ratio, the men are mostly engineers and the women are standard office people and pencil pushers. I have a huskey build and played football in college, i was a lineman. I have a alpha body but a beta personality. The following events are from a company get to geather at a local sports bar. All I wanted was a ride to the airport.

>be me
>forced into going on company get togeather with everyone from the office.
>not just the engineers but everyone.
>havent been in a relationship for a few years and dont want to be, I have it good.
>Ive had a few drinks, started talking with others I see in the office but dont talk to.
>I just want to put names to faces and get general info about them.
>Basic white girl office chick that I absolutly hate comes over and starts talking with us.

>I started talking about how I was getting ready to fly out to las vegas to help upgrade one of our clients systems.
>start talking about other things including shit I honestly never wanted to talk with her about. I hate this bitch, she annoys the fuck out of me being all basic and dumb.
>this girl is the definition of a waste of space, you can put a traffic cone on her desk and it would do the same amount of work she does in a single day in about an hour.
>several drinks went by and sphagetti user starts to kick in, this is when I start slurring my words and become more noodle like when walking.
>She asks if I needed a ride home and if I needed a ride to the airport.
>"thats really thoughtful" i replied, ya I do need a ride.
>she says great Ill take you home, and crash and drive you in the morning.

(law and order dun dun) MISTAKE NUMBER ONE: apparently when you take a girl home from a bar they expect things to get saucy.

Pre type your green text next time

part II:
>we get back to my place and I show her to the guest room, it has a bathroom attached with a shower and a TV so she should just leave me alone.
>I tell her I would be downstairs playing on the xbox for a while. She says "ok user" all slutty like. I didnt realise at the time what was going on, I just thought she was going to drive me to the airport.

>get downstairs and open the fridge, and get out a bottle of bubbly. Man I love drinking the bubbly especially when im already drunk. It doesnt even have to be a special ocasion, i drink it like beer.
>take out a glass from the cubbord and start pouring myself some bubbly for game time.

(law and order dun dun) MISTAKE NUMBER TWO: appearently women think that the bubbly is romantic. This drink somehow escilates the "romantic encounter."

>Go sit down and start playing when i get a tap on the shoulder.
>think to myself "what the fuck can this bitch possiably want."
>Turn around and answer her by saying hey, i kinida slurred the hey because i was drunk.
>she says "user where is my glass?"
>I get up and pour her a glass, and then we both sit down on the couch, I ask do you want to watch something on Netflix.

(law and order dun dun) MISTAKE NUMBER THREE: apparently Netflix is designed to increase the intimacy of romantic encounters, and somehow by binge watching TV shows humans reproduce.

Part III:
>she picked a movie called "Drinking Buddies" a movie about flirty coworkers who go on a craft brewery tour and get bangy.
>we start watching it, it seemd like every couple of minutes she would get closer and closer to me until she was practically laying on me.
>Oh fuck, my arm is about to fall asleep, better move it before I die.

(law and order dun dun) MISTAKE NUMBER FOUR appearently moving your arm because it is falling asleep signles to the female that you are willing to wrap it around her and snuggle.

>we are now engaged in intense snuggling, O MY GOD WHAT HAVE I DONE. ALL I WANTED WAS A RIDE TO THE AIRPORT!!!
>mistake number five came straight after mistake number four like it was almost part of the same mistake.
>I began to lock eyes with her.

(law amd order dun dun) MISTAKE NUMBER FIVE apprarently locking eyes signales to the female that you want to kiss as long as mistakes 1-4 came before this point.

>HOLY FUCK WE ARE MAKING OUT AND NOW MY HANDS ARE AUTOMATICALLY GRABBING AS MUCH ASS AS THEY POSSIABLY CAN
>body engages in autopilot, things begin to get really saucy.
>she begs me to carry her upstairs, and i complied.
>lay her dowm on the guest bed and continue making out with her.
>in my head I was thinking that this could not get any further than it already had.

(law and order dun dun) MISTAKE NUMBER SIX apparently carrying a female upstairs to a bed even though it is not your bead signals to the female that you are willing to mate.

>she begins to undress on the bed and all my almonds started to melt. I began to take off my clothes when she pushed me over and started to rip off my clothes.
>fuuuuccccckkkkkkk I cant believe that I am about to fuck the sole person at work that I hate. who whould have known.
>proceaded to fuck her brains out on the bed, then on the chair across from the bed, then on the floor across from the chair and then finally finishing up in the shower.

>we sleep together in my bed because it is clean.
>she does drive me to the airport and dropped me off, I kissed her before I left.

My comfortable bachelors life is over and ive been in a relationship with the most basic office bitch on the planet ever since. All I wanted was a fucking ride to the fucking airport. I like her to much to go back to being single, this is my life now. fuck.

Should have just taken a Uber

Is she at least hot?

Should have posted this in the robot zone to trigger a mass suicide.

I know but i was not thinking at all

She is pretty good looking, thick ass but dumber than roadkill.

I didnt want to upset the robots

Well man you got two options tie her up and fuck her to death or break up with her and no one does the whole “ how could do that she loved you” bullshit at work

They're already upset. Fuck 'em.

what's the conversation like? can she cook? does she leave you alone at least for short amounts of time?

she wants to move in now, people say we are "so cute together". she comes over and cooks for me now, she goes through all my stuff, internet history and phone. she is like big brother but dumb.

you lost me at huge invasion of privacy. bitch gotta go

Post pics

she does make a mean cheesy chicken pot and thai wings.
She talks with me everyday, its having its effects, sometimes i call her to report in.

nope, she doesn't let me save them from snap chat because she knows id paste her ass all over the internet because its delicious

You fucked up man gotta drop the bitch people in your office are going to mad but just ignore them do your job it will blow over soon

she doesn't care if i watch porn or Shintoist, she just doesn't want me talking to other girls. She is very territorial.

This

the last time she went through my phone i said "you can check my phone while sucking my dick" she did just that

Well when you put it that way...
Still, I'd freak out. Thank heavens for the fingerprint scanner and app which sends pictures to my email when people fail the scan.

at first i was totally against it but she lets me do the same to her so i don't know. i just cant believe that she likes me this much to get this territorial. She really is growing on me, at first I wanted out so bad but now i'm starting to get the hand of it so to say. I think im going to let her move in less "privacy" but more pussy, and food and company and kisses and pussy and food.

(law and order dun dun) MISTAKE NUMBER SEVEN

Well if you're that easy going, I'm not sure there's a problem.
I lol'd

>Post pics
POST PICS

wow you take less agency for your life then a basic bitch, congrats you played yourself

i do feel like im going in that direction, im so conflicted its bad

whenever I want to break up with a hookup, I always give out the:
"getting back together with my ex" excuser
..

you could spice it up and enhance story and claim ex also flew to las vegas, the sparks re-ignited, and you told her everythign about office hook-up...

unless vegas trip was too long ago, and just stick to the 'getting back together with ex' story. that story alwasy works. these exes, in my stories, always live about 60 miles away, which helps explain why she isnt around more often, in case my story time gets challenged

Or just ignore her it tell her it was a one night stand

...

its been like 5 months since the airport, ive dug a very deep hole