Ask a guy who slept with both of his female roommates within 3 days of moving in anything

Ask a guy who slept with both of his female roommates within 3 days of moving in anything

How fat are they, honestly?

How ugly are you all?

Was it a 3 some? Otherwise not interested

Did they know about each other?

Nah.

Not fat at all, not even in the slightest

Both of them are about a 7 out of 10 by conventional standards

I'd consider myself a 7 or 8. I've been told by multiple people (including both of them) that I should take up modeling

Unfortunately no. One of them would be down, the other isn't. The one who isn't is my best friend and she would probably only have a 3some with me and her ex, but he wouldn't have it

If I wasn't getting hit by seasonal depression and was actually going out regularly the other one and I would probably have taken a random girl home by now, but alas...

The one who was my friend before we moved in together knows about the other. She was actually pretty pissed off when she found out, but it was because she's jealous despite the fact that she won't date me because she's still seeing her ex

The other one MIGHT know but we've never talked about it and I don't know if she would even care

post ur pic faggot or u are full of shit

Pic of what? Me?

Are you a pathological liar, or is this just a random lie?

That is what the phrase "ur pic" would mean...

>The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.

Is your family concerned about your ongoing delusions?

How do I talk to girls?

Neither

Not comfortable posting a picture of myself (or them) on Sup Forums, but here's some proof

This is a text convo with the one who's my friend that I screenshotted. She was asking why I was uncomfortable when her ex would come over

like people

Bullshit. I know it couldn't have been a threesome, but one and the other after, believable.
Regardless, I need an explanation, including time of day, weather, location, and every other detail that is necessary.

You sound like a real bitch.

As lame as it sounds, working out will do wonders for your confidence.

If I had to recommend any two things to a guy who was interested in learning how to pick up chicks it would be
A) work out
B) read Models by Mark Manson

Getting outside of your comfort zone to start is terrifying at first but after a couple of weeks you end up feeling empowered and it becomes almost natural.

In order to have things to talk about and improve your conversational skills it helps to have an interesting life. Traveling, going out more, picking up interesting hobbies, etc.

Even if you manage to get yourself out there you could hit a wall when it comes to talking to girls if all you ever do is sit in your room in front of your computer and your favorite hobby is jerking off to hentai, but hell, even my friend who lurked for years in the past found a girlfriend who knows all about his hentai stash and his anime body pillow

this

Did everyone clap?

It'll take a couple of minutes but I'll get back to you here in a bit. And it wasn't a threesome. I still regularly sleep with one of them (literally just fucked her like an hour or two ago before she left to go on a date with a guy I went to high school with)

Ehh, it was a heated time and we were fighting alot. There were some pretty deep feelings involved so when she found there were a lot of lengthy conversations about the whole ordeal

Wait how long did you know your best friend's roommate?
And had you already had sex with your best friend before or was that a first time thing?

So in case you were wondering, yes, you're a real bitch.

kek, even if this is true you now have a live-in relationship with 2 women, and you're cheating on both of them with the other, it'll go badly.

lol you wouldn't be able to make eye contact with her if J* came over? you're a lil cuck aren'tya

Part 1:
>move in on Tuesday
>go out Friday night with both of them and with my previous (male) roommate
>get home from bars, everyone's drunk as shit
>despite the fact that my previous roommate knew I really liked my friend he was flirting with her the entire night
>he basically got her as drunk as possible and tried sleeping with her that night
>see the two of them go into her room
>get pissed off and storm outside
>smoking a cigarette with the other girl who came outside with me
>"i don't even know why she chose him over you user. he's not that good looking and you're obviously an objectively attractive male"
>walking back up to apartment
>turn to her outside the apartment door and say "you know, I've never kissed a girl who smokes"
>kiss her
>she was into it
>we run inside to her room (right next to my friend's room) and start fucking like animals
>blow my load all over her and her sheets
>wake up in the morning and binge watch the last 3 episodes of season 7 of GoT that I hadn't seen with her

I hate you. I've been trying to bang mine for a year and I'm about to get kicked out of my group house because of that.

But I mean...

Can you blame me?

Continue... Remember, more details. I wanna know everything. Did she suck you off? Did you go in raw? Was she tight? loose? Wet or dry? Come on OP you gotta give us details.

it was because by that time her and i had slept together and she was on the fence about her ex, so her and i would say/do inappropriate shit around him, crack jokes and throw each other sexual glances. he was getting cucked hard until I got tired of feeling like it was a game and realized I wasn't going to end up dating her

...

The one I banged in part 1 plays sports. She's small, petite, and fit. Blonde. Her pussy was freshly shaved, and I've never fucked anyone who gets as wet as her. It's absolutely crazy how wet she gets, especially in comparison to the other.

She's not the tightest girl I've ever fucked but I still enjoyed it. Yes, I fucked her raw. She's on birth control and condoms are a pain in the ass, she doesn't mind.

I can't really remember the specifics about the sex we had because it was a while ago now and I was pretty drunk at the time. I surprised myself with my stamina though, I usually get whiskey dicked pretty hard but I went at it for a solid 20-30 minutes in several positions before cumming all over her, you may find the ensuing sexual encounters over the next couple of days more interesting, stay tuned

>binge watch the last 3 episodes of season 7 of GoT

Pleb

Enjoy the syphilis. You really think someone who smokes cares one bit about personal hygiene and not spreading diseases? You're screwed, OP.

What's your system for food? Like do you write your own name on all your milk and bread and shit?

Do you have a roster for cleaning the kitchen and bathroom or does that just not get done?

Do you pay the same evenly for rent or does the person with the larger bedroom pay a few bucks more?

If I visited in April would your crappy plastic Christmas tree still be up?

I'm interested in these as well

it sounds kinda like you're a lesbian

Duds deserves answers.

Also, well done OP.
How different did their pussies feel? Were they as tight as each other or was their a noticeable difference

Part 2:
>friend doesn't yet know about me sleeping with other roommate
>now Tuesday of the following week
>talked with friend and we worked everything out
>about 8 or 9pm we find ourselves in my room
>giving friend back massage
>her shirt comes off and I unhook her bra as she's laying with her face in my pillow
>continue giving back massage as my dick gets throbbing hard
>she notices, reaches her hand back and grabs my cock
>starts playing with it for a couple of minutes but then stops
>teasingly say something about her blueballing me
>tell her "I'm just gonna jerk off and finish on your back"
>"how did I know you were gonna say that user?"
>she continues laying there as I jerk off with one hand and massage her back with the other
>feel this pent up sexual energy welling inside me
>blow by far the biggest load of my entire life all over her back
>even though she can't see it, she can feel the insane amount of cum I've just blasted all over her
>she says "oh my god user!" and starts laughing
>we both laugh hysterically for several minutes while I grab a towel from my bathroom to clean up

>Duds
Fucking auto correct madness ruining my posts once again.

Shoulda fucked her then

Or rubbed it in like suntan lotion...

Or licked it off while she prepared the strapon to peg you

how old are you three?

Or used it as lube before she stretched your anus out.

No real systems in place. We're all grad students so if things do get messy we understand it's hard to consistently keep up with cleaning when we're drowning in work/schoolwork.

That said, my friend is the cleanest, I'm comparatively very clean for a male my age, the other one is somewhat messy and doesn't do the best job of cleaning up after herself.

I don't mind cleaning and my friend can't stand living in a messy apartment for very long so she'll go on cleaning sprees every once in a while if things get bad, which I'm more than happy to help her out with.

For food we don't label anything. The pantry is the only thing that's organized but we basically just know to only use/eat what's ours.

Rent is paid separately and we each have a separate lease. The rooms have slight variations and we picked which ones we wanted in the beginning, no problems there. It's 3-bed/3-bath so we each have our own bathroom.

Not sure what we're going to do for a tree. The "other" girl and I have been collecting Lagunitas beer bottles and plan on making a Christmas tree out of beer bottles, we'll see if it happens tho.

Or do all these except with her ex, and you're wearing a dress

So, when is someone moving out?
End of the month is my guess, if not sooner.

>binge watch
>three episodes

That is 3 hours tbqh

And some cat ears (just to be sure)

How did you get them to sleep with you?

(Shit was so cash)

Awesome. Can't believe you answered. Thanks dude!

Total fist pump on the scoring pussy business too btw

Probably

Part 3:
Messed up my timeline, had to look at a Calendar to get the days right. Part 2 happened on Saturday during the afternoon. I.e. literally the day after I had fucked the other one

>Now several hours later, still Saturday
>this time we're in her room studying
>she lays down on her bed to rest
>I join her
>end up putting my hand on her crotch, applying pressure, and moving it around
>noobjections.jpg
>my hand finds it way into her pants
>start playing with her pussy
>wait a little bit to warm her up before i slide my fingers in her panties
>shes breathing heavy and starts unzipping my pants
>she spits on her hand for lube and starts jerking me off
>friend has this uncanny ability to produce the slipperiest spit that works just as good as lube until it dries out
>continue playing with her clit until she has a wild orgasm, clenching onto me and breathing heavily with her face buried in my chest
>she cools down and continues jerking me off
>"where are you gonna finish user?"
>"ummm...in your mouth?"
>"how did I know you were going to say that"
>rolls her eyes
>getting close and she can tell
>takes me in her mouth as I shoot another gigantic load that she swallows like a champ
>go back to studying until we pass out together in her bed

>seasonal depression
How white are you?

Im not 3 im 22

Just enough to rule the world

So when do you fuck her?

How does it feel to lie?

Never, we're probably all going to renew our lease. We enjoy living together and have a lot of fun when we have time to go out on the weekends and do shit together.

I didn't "get them" to do anything. They wanted to. I tend to be a very fun person to be around when I have my shit together and I'm not depressed. Couple that with my attitude about sexuality and I end up getting quite a few women who want to have sex with me. My mentality is just that sex isn't as big of a deal as some people make it out to be. We're all human and we all want to and enjoy having sex. When you have that attitude, you take care of yourself (hygiene-wise) so that you look presentable, and you have a positive, fun, energetic and outgoing attitude that make people enjoy being around you, sex just tends to come naturally.

What a colossal faggot you are.

Man, I share the attitude but I'm also in a committed relationship with a prude.

Help

Lets just pretend for a second you're not making all this up.
You're only a few days in... give it time, it will eventually get toxic, with chicks feels are always involved. Enjoy the pussy while it lasts.

Nothing like keeping two female roommates from killing each other.

23 actually, good guess though

Part 4:

>now Tuesday
>back in my room again
>another massage (friend REALLY likes back massages)
>same routine, shirt comes off, bra unhooked
>start massaging her ass, she likes it
>pull her pants down just below her asscheeks and continue massaging
>rubbing my cock against/between her asscheeks
>havetoriskittogetthebiscuit.gif
>pull my cock out and continue rubbing it against her
>she pushes her hips back and up a little, inviting me onwards
>she's wet enough that I forgo grabbing the lube from the bathroom and just lube up my cock with some spit
>she's still laying down on her stomach, face in my pillow
>pants still on pulled down below her asscheeks
>slowly slide my now throbbing hard cock inside her wet pussy
>she moans
>lean forward and start kissing her upper back and neck
>things get heated
>she turns around and takes off her pants, i do the same
>get up and turn the lights out
>I had been wanting to fuck her badly for a long time
>only other time we had sex we were both drunk and I whiskey-dicked hard, it was an embarrassingly awful experience that neither one of us has ever brought up again
>decide now is my time to make up for it
>proceed to have crazy hot sex with her for an entire hour
>(leaving out details because I'm tired of typing and need to go meet up with her at the library on campus here soon)
>finally ready to give it to her
>turn her around so I'm fucking her missionary, obviously for the sole purpose of procreation
>right as I'm about to cum I pull out and intentionally try to shoot my hot cum as forcefully possible towards her face
>ends up all over her stomach, neck, face, and some in her hair
>"god dammit user!"
>we both start laughing
>hang out for the rest of the night and pass out in my bed

So, you didn't even make her wet?

...

>bangs his two roommates like some shit out of a fucking movie
>is depressed
get the fuck out.

Sometimes life's so good you start thinking about how it's gonna end and that fucks you up right proper

This all started in the past. We've been living together for 3 months now and things are fine. Friend has started seeing her ex again more frequently so now the other roomie and I just fuck every now and then until/unless the guy she's been seeing finally mans up and makes a move.

All 3 of us have very similar attitudes about sex and we've all been very adult about the situation. Only mild issue now is that my friend doesn't like feeling like a third wheel because the other roomie and I have gotten to be pretty close, but she hasn't been making a big deal about it, it just annoys her because her and I don't spend as much time together as we used to. We still consider each other best friends though.

>seasonal depression
you sound like you don't even fucking know what depression is. You attention seeking whores make me sick

smoke weed faggot

things to actually be depressed about:
>losing a loved one
>having no money
>feeling like your goals are impossible

things not to be depressed about
>banging your two average-hot roommates like some kind of fucking superstar

David is that u lol

You did it backwards OP, enjoy your drama. I fucked my roommate silly the last 2 weeks we lived together and never talked to her again

I know, right?

Sex isn't everything. It's nice and it definitely helps but my depression is more related to how I consider myself to be doing overall in life (work, school, health, getting enough sleep, eating properly and working out).

If I'm not doing some/most of those things or happy with how I'm doing in them then the sex doesn't make up for it.

Not all women are created equal. She doesn't produce very much natural lubrication at all and is definitely the driest girl I've ever known. That's what lube is for my dude.


Anyways, I'm heading to the library to meet up with her (best friend). I'll see if I can keep this going on my phone for a while.

No sir, I am not David.

Well I guess I got my shit together then because the only thing that ever bums me out is not getting laid.

Another 12 year old too stupid to talk about feelings

The girl sounds like a dumb roasty i can already feel the stupid drama from this text, mindbreak her and get her to stop bitching or its a lost cause

>751216423

are you fuckin 12