Be me

>be me
>be a good guy
>love to cook and shit
>total night owl
>move into duplex apartment
>$1400/mo, absurd, but standard for the city
>like to have dinner late, like anywhere from 8-10
>landlords are autistic old fucks
>start demanding that I stop cooking after 8 pm
>also demand that I don't cook before 9 am
>also demand that I don't shower after 9 pm
>also demand that I don't shower before 6 am
>also demand that I stop leaving lights on
>also demand that I don't have women over

>start getting paranoid that my liquor is disappearing
>home during the week for an odd day off
>hear shuffling in my kitchen
>peek around a corner, it's the old man
>decide to not announce my presence, curious wtf he be doing
>he leaves
>go to my kitchen
>everything looks normal
>had left an open 12-pack on the counter with 7 beers left...don't remember drinking that much
>start Sherlock Holmesing the situation
>match serial nums on the bottom of cans in my recycling vs unopened
>beer is unaccounted for
>suddenly realize my paranoia was legit, he has totally been doing this a while and I'm not becoming a forgetful drunkard

>find out the apartment isn't legally registered
>realize I can get away with anything with no repercussions
>they literally can't evict me even if I stop paying rent

What should I do?

stop paying rent

stop paying rent

torch it

paying rent stop

whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa slow down bud
what city is this duplex in
landlord tenant attorney here

Do yo live in a state w stand your ground? Shoot faggot landlord in the head next time he breaks in.

you're gonna wanna stop paying rent

Change locks. Cook and fuck women in the shower. Don't pay rent.

Seattle

you're just a fucking squatter if you stop paying rent. do that. you're a protected class in seattle if you're a scumfuck piece of shit, i hear.
just don't pay rent for 3 months.

get guns, stop paying rent, if they attack you kill them

Hot water doesn't get hot enough to cook a woman in the shower

Plz respond

Also have utilities in my name, I think I might have a claim to the property now

Renting should be outlawed in the United States. Just the term landlord itself is outrageous. Nobody should be able to make money simply because they sit back on their ass and let other people use their shit. It is 100% non productive and offers no benefit to society.

...

so if the duplex isnt registered, he can still evict you, he would just have to register first.

they cant place those limitations on you either. just do them anyways. ignore their complaints.

also the landlord doesnt have the right to enter your property other than for emergencies or with reasonable notice. so set up a camera and catch those mother fuckers going into your apartment.

make a long list of these complaints. then threaten to sue them for violating your covenant of quiet enjoyment.

dont stop paying rent, because likely it will cost less than 1400 to get registered, inspected, and evict you.

in the mean time figure out why theyre not registered... theres probably some element of the duplex which would run afoul of the code. request records of the registration and inspection history of that apartment. see if it used to be registered or if they have had inspection problems in the past. use this to your advantage.

recognize that none of this will matter at the end of your lease because they dont have to renew.

More...

>exgf was poo-in-loo
>pretty and awesome
>landlords meet her
>call me and ask to talk later
>ask me if she is homeless
>I say no...
>then she should go to her home, she's loud and increasing utility costs
>I laugh because she WAS loud when I fuck her
>but I don't give a fuck at this point

>advertised yard and patio
>put up my baller ass patio set
>they get upset
>demand I remove it because it's clutter and casting a shadow that will kill the lawn

>have a bike
>store in the garage
>you need to ride it more, or get rid of it
>ignore them
>few months later bike goes missing
>oh we don't know user, maybe a homeless person took it
>possible, so I let it slide

>landlord insists on bringing my mail every day, despite me asking him to stop
>he keeps opening my mail on accident
>i keep telling him to stop
>but he keeps doing it

Did you just post this same thing on /ck/?

Poor non land owning faggot

From my research, if I report them, they get a fine, and have to pay for my relocation cost, and I technically have no legally binding agreement to pay them anything

but then how would you handle high density housing, like apartment complexes. Someone has to build them and maintain them.

lmao yeah, but thought it could use its own thread

You’re only supposed to have 7 letters in Scrabble

My family always plays with 9. Do some research.

Opening mail like that is illegal user, more dirt you can use to for your lawsuit

It's definitely not up to code on many levels, faulty wiring, no smoke detector, single entry/exit, plumbing issue which led to my favorite request

>user, please stop flushing your toilet paper, it's bad for the pipes.

>put it in the trash like we do!

You live with some retards.
Put some slippery shit in front of the door for when old man walks in he'll get fucked up

it's illegal to open mail intended for others right?
once is an accident, repeated occasions aren't

Yeah, luckily he always scrawls some form of 'sorry' on the envelopes, which is nice evidence

are your landlords hispanic?

>user, please stop flushing your toilet paper, it's bad for the pipes.

>put it in the trash like we do!


>put it in the trash like we do!

>put it in the trash

>like we do!
Autism confirmed. yeah

lawyer user here again, that long post was me obviously

none of that is acceptable behavior

document all of this on a list, with dates, descriptions of the problems.

note their unpermitted illegal entry into your dwelling
theft of your property, including bicycle and beer
interference with quiet enjoyment including illegal restrictions on activities and hours, restriction of use of common areas
interference with your mail, a federal offense

assign each item a % value of the effect it has on your tenancy
like
revocation of use of patio and lawn: 5%
revocation of showering or cooking before 6am or after 9pm 10%
interference with right to have guests 10%
unlawful entry into unit 5%
theft of personal property including bicycle and beer 10%
interference with receipt and privacy of mail 10%

total: 50%

due to your illegal interference of my rights as a tenant, i am abating my rent by 50% from this point forward, until such interference ceases.

deliver this letter 10 days before rent is due. they have 10 days to remedy the noncompliance. if they dont stop, you can break the lease and demand your deposit. or you can stay and abate your rent. they may register, try to evict, and you will have HELD THE ABATED AMOUNT. DO NOT SPEND IT. then they will have to answer in court.

can't he just switch lock?

Mix something in with your booze. Laxatives maybe?

Thank you friend

if you want to leave, yea, i can see seattle making them pay for your relocation cost. but you have a right to be there as a paying tenant, the more fun thing to do would be to force them to bring everything into compliance and treat you with some respect lol

Not op but if I ever have a shit landlord I'm capping this for reference. Fortunately my landlady currently is pretty nice... Actually I've been a bit of a dick to her kek

just a sidenote to everyone with landlord issues OR no landlord issues (yet):

photos. make lots of photos. the day you look at the flat with the landlord, the day you move in, every occasion a worker does maintainance or in case any changes are made.

don't be sorry afterwards, prepare for any scenario.

Found the socialist...

afraid of differing concepts from your stubborn way of thinking, eh?

So you live with them? Wat lol
You don't make much sense.

just remember it depends on where you live, you cant do this in florida where i am, you can only withhold rent in escrow, you cant repair and abate. depends on the state and city, always consult with a LT attorney first, they are usually happy to give a free consult and if not the legal aid society in your area usually has free attorneys.
yes photos are key
also putting everything in writing, signing, dating, keeping a copy.
dont text your landlord its the dumbest thing you can do
email is best
certified mail is worth its weight in gold

They advertised it as a duplex apartment, separate everything, nothing shared except walls. But, they can't seem to let go of control of the space.

lol this is so fucking stupid
please explain for us how things would work after you "outlaw" renting in a democratic society

But, I've been googling and it seems that the city would call it an Accessory Dwelling Unit

lawyer user again
this is a common problem especially with older people and inexperienced landlords
especially where they used to occupy the space or a friend or family member used to live there
they just mentally cant stop thinking of it as "their" space, and they cant conceptualize the idea of ownership being different from total and absolute control of every aspect.

to them its still "theirs" because they own it, you pay for the privilege of staying there, but they think you should still have to live by their rules because they own it.

FUCKING RETARDED I HATE STUPID PEOPLE AND I HATE ASSHOLE OLD PEOPLE
FUCKING DIE ALREADY

ugh i deal with this so much on a daily basis i have no idea how ive held on to my sanity

We end up in government housing like in the UK and look how luxurious and pleasant those shitholes are

lol, when I heard 1400 for rent I knew it must be seattle. I live in Burien. Tell me why you're paying so much fucking money instead of moving a bit South

I accidentally texted my previous landlord
>hey, does he still insist on us painting the walls, the cunt?
because it was meant for my roommate
good thing the landlord has never paid taxes correctly and was afraid we'd snitch to the tax office about his false contract.

I wonder the same thing myself sometimes, the best reason is that I can get to work in ~15 mins.

we dont know enough about how the property is constructed to make that call

it matters whether its a house with a garage converted into an apartment, for example, or a duplex building with the landlords living in one half

either way, the same LT rules apply, theres just different permitting requirements

Yeah, duplex style, they live in the other half.

What do you do? I work at a restuarant on Cap Hill. While I admit traffic is a real fucking bitch, the Light Rail and bus system pretty much allow you to go anywhere in Seattle without a car. Even still I end up driving to work. TBH I would definitely love to live in Seattle too, but 1400 is jsut ridiculous

move out, they're obviously fucking batshit insane.

when you stop paying rent you'll wake up gagged in your bathtub missing a kidney

In some countries (cant remember which) you're only allowed a certain area of land so you cant become a greedy landlord

oh yea i forgot to mention, i would definitely add some sort of measure to prevent their entry while you are home, at least lol i dont trust these fucks at all

This doesnt seem fun at all

>What should I do?
pee in their butts

You answered your own question....
sue the shit out of them if they have a problem with it. They led you in to a bad deal.

i think thats pretty retarded
if you have money, and can buy the property, its a business. just as if you bought a restaurant. or a store. you have to maintain it, manage it, pay for its operation, etc. there is risk involved. its not like you literally sit back and do nothing.

its passive income but thats smart, i cant wait to have enough passive income that i dont have to work everyday

Also, what exactly does a lease mean in an unregistered apartment?

Is it even legally binding?

Could they shoot me with some castle doctrine shit if I really become a dick? Or vice versa?

Can I fall and sue their homeowners insurance?

If people as a whole demanded better, there wouldn't be a problem.

>i'm entitled to be a jew
Give it back, Shlomo.

>roofies=lemon party

Jeez, the answer was so simple

lawfag again
lol no its not really but im an asshole and would derive unbelievable amounts of pleasure from making their life fucking miserable

if one of them died during the legal battle i would pop some champagne and fuck my loud ass GF in the shower with a roast in the oven at 2am

its just the sort of justice i live for

im the kind of person that would go into their house and drink their beer in the middle of the day and leave the empty beer cans out intentionally. shit in the top tank of their toilets. smear shit under the door handles of their car. run the shower at all hours of the day and night. play porn loudly everyday. make as much noise as possible during legally permitted hours.

fuck these people they are scum

true.
happened to my gf, landlord couple was fucking annoying controlfreaks and over-protective.

OP here

I think we're soul mates

Not at all. Socialism has just happened to fail every single time it's been implemented, usually with the side effect of millions of people dying in the process.

>inb4 that wasn't real socialism!
Yeah, it was. It was socialism as applied to the real world. There is, and never will be, a utopia.

>inb4 but social programs, roads, hur dur, they are all socialist!
No, they are forms of social welfare, which is absolutely not socialism. They have existed, in different forms, since the first societies existed. Socialism is a newer economic philosophy based entirely on class dynamics (which have been disproved) and eventually shifted to power dynamics with Post Modern philosophy (which has also been disproved).

>inb4 but muh Scandinavia is socialist!
No, it's not. The governments there reject that label. They claim to be capitalist economies with strong social welfare programs.

>TL;DR
Socialism is a massive failure in every way. And you are either fucking retarded for believing in it, or a fucking evil person for wanting to inflict that type of misery on the world, again.

lol give it back to who? why? someone willingly sold it to me? what the fuck are you talking about? did you graduate from fucking highschool you tard?

Despite being a shit hole, the place is worth a cool million with the land value.

If I managed to squat long enough until they die, could I have it? They're in their 80s

Now that is retarded.

Yoy wouldn't say that if you ever had 1 single tennent shitloard.

Uncle sam already tried it. To date they are the worst ratholes ever built

>muh absolute ownership
Ownership is what society decides, not you.

>which have been disproved
6/8 such laughable bullshit

lol fun story
my parents moved into a new house, converted the garage to more living space. now, theres no garage for me to work on cars in. so i built one. but no i didnt get permits because fuck the county they do nothing to guarantee safety, they selectively enforce rules, its all a money making scheme. so fuck them.

but their asshole neighbor calls and complains that we dont have a permit (which he didnt even know, he just wanted to cause trouble)

this old fuck was all crippled up, limping around, find out its bc he had a stroke. fuck him the old miserable piece of shit youre not taking it out on me.

well Home depot delivers some wood one day and uses part of his driveway to get to the garage because its behind my parents house. he runs out screaming and yelling and literally hitting the truck with his cane. doesnt want us on his property. ok buddy, chill.

he puts up rebar stakes in the grass along the property line. i get pissed and say its a fucking hazard, worried that my parents will fall and impale themselves. later that night of course I FALL and rip my pants on one of these things and hurt my leg.

demandletter.jpg

she sends me a check for the couple of hundred bucks i demanded.

when i built the garage i intentionally placed the window facing their property. every time i come to my parents house i put a boombox in the window and blast nasty ass old school rap and spanish music at them. flick him off every time i see him. tell him "hope you have another stroke" "your wife looks like a man" etc this was last fall.

by spring, they sold the house and moved out.

fuckyea.jpg

>Ownership is what society decides, not you
Maybe in a shithole country.
Where has socialism worked?

adverse possession requires open, notorious, hostile occupancy for at least 7 years.

living there while paying rent does not count
most likely you would be ultimately ejected, and saddled with a large money judgment for unpaid rent

this is the stupidest idea ever just put it out of your head

It took you trillions of dollars to sabotage it, nigger. Socialism is the steady state of non-psychopathic society.

sounds to me like you have anger issues and a lot of hate to give

wishing someone to have "another" stroke is pretty vile and nasty.

without permission, people are very likely to build additional space way too close to property borders, which is illegal as well and reduces the value and comfort of the other property.

Are you gainfully employed?

Lol good to know

underrated

Self-employed and not ameridumb enough to have literally no identity outside of my lord and master employer.
Unlike you, larping neet just waiting to inherit daddy's property.

We havent tried true socialism as it was intended by the Venus project.
look it up. Machines will run the world one day.

Lol I'm not OP or anyone discussing property. I own my house. I'm glad you're employed though. Do you enjoy your government taking money out of your paycheck and giving it to people that refuse to work even though they can?

lol generally im not an angry person
and if the county came and said hey you need to have permits id be like damn ok you got me and pay up, which is what i did

but that old miserable fuck had no business sticking his nose in. ironically, i built everything to code, and observed all proper setbacks. but when i reported him to code enforcement they made him tear down a shed because he had built it right on the property line.

ironic, isnt it? such a hypocrite he was. just a shitty unhappy person. it really bugs me when people meddle where it doesnt concern them. he had nothing to gain by getting me in trouble. its just that he derived some sort of pleasure by making my life worse. so, i returned the favor.

i understand the purpose of permitting and zoning. ideally, it makes sense. but in practice, they dont enforce those rules uniformly. and many have little to no common sense basis, and the bureaucracy is unbelievable. and the expense. its ridiculous. AND theyre fucking idiots to boot. i had to correct the permitting office's math twice when computing the % coverage of cement on the lot.

you know what the electrical inspector told us? we needed "goof rings." what the fuck is a goof ring? he couldnt tell us the proper term. asked our electrician; he had never heard it. took a week to figure out that what he wanted was gang box extenders on any outlet not flush with the drywall. fuck that guy, compliance shouldnt be that much of a burden on the homeowner.

thats why fuck permits

where i am a verbal agreement is enforced

>parent was judge dealing with this shit constantly

>thinks the government takes money out of my check
>owns his own house
Shut up, shill. You don't own dick.
I am extremely bothered by the government using my check for corporate welfare money which just goes "offshore" and I'd rather they did just give it to the niggers who will at least keep it in circulation.

same, theyre hard to prove, but they are enforceable if one year or less

if that guy pulled this shit with the property line on you, it was legit how you acted.
bureaucracy is a bitch. i've worked an internship at a local city administration and the shit i've heard on the phone was the worst whining out of shere boredome i've heard in my life. people complaining about "trees being to big" and it being the city's responsibility to cut them down, as the leafs clog the pipes. yada yada ...

>My family plays it's own way, do research
How the fuck are they supposed to research how your family plays scrabble?

lol only socialism makes hitler look like the little leagues

You don't have to believe my property status. I don't care. I'm glad we can agree on some points

well if you have furniture and make out a cheque for the same amount each month then the owner becomes a defaco landlord regardless of contract

kind of make sense to me

You're a fucking retarded jackass. Suck start a shotgun, faggot.

exactly
everything has been dumbed down by lawyers to cater to the lowest fucking denominator. its not like lawyers want it to be that way, but nobody has any personal responsibility anymore, and we got tired of people claiming that the city should have protected them, etc.

i know how to build a garage. its already been through a fucking hurricane and it didnt even move. my parents house, ironically, lost a few shingles. some others in the neighborhood lost roofs. but you're going to pick on me? why? because i didn't fill out your little form? fuck that. if it blows down, or kills me, or crushes my neighbors car, its on me. i own it. its my responsibility.

its funny, there are some things that are legit complaints. uneven sidewalks are a big one for me, they can be really dangerous and are a particular hazard for kids and old people. that sucks, we owe them special care. but people bitching and moaning about their neighbors when whatever theyre doing doesnt even affect them? ridiculous.

renting a commercial property out right now, and the city wanted a "transportation analysis" from some parking software which verifies that a truck of a certain size can turn around in the driveway. tenant was like... i dont know what that is, i dont have that software, but i have turned larger trucks around in that parking lot. just come watch me do it. ill bring you a video of me turning the truck around. "nope we need to see the software."

WHAT?!?!??! FUCKKKKKKK YYYOOOOOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU

but its hard to prove whether there is a month to month agreement or a long term lease in place. month to month = they can terminate at any time, vs. long term = they can only terminate if you substantially breach.

if you dont write it down, how do you prove its a year lease vs a month? pretty tough.