I don't know where else to ask this but I have some questions following my short incarceration and eventual stay at a...

I don't know where else to ask this but I have some questions following my short incarceration and eventual stay at a psych center last year. Have any of you been locked up either in jail or in a psych ward and experienced strange communication techniques and body language such as hand signals, leaving items around, ways of speaking, clothing and such? I'm going to go into detail about a few instances that stand out to me and hopefully some anons can help decipher them.

I've had a couple psych ward stays. I didn't consciously pick up on anything suspicious like what you say. I was kind of little one of the times though. Maybe your comments will jog my memory. What sorts of things are on your mind?

>near the end of my stay at holding center
>have had a few visits but because of my behavior my last visit was behind glass
>had been banging my head against bars for who knows why
>had clothes stripped off and was in a "turtle blanket"
>am given orangies to see my visitor
>when being walked back im told
if youre good youll get a conical visit
>schizoid mind thinks its my ex
>try "being good" by following OCD routine to a T
>after a bit of waiting a guard comes out to the other hall across from me with a bag
>feminie walk to him
>this is unusual guards never have bags
>starts pulling out treats for himself like a sucker, starbucks drink, candy
>my mind twists this into him being my ex
>he comes out to the walk with the sucker looking seductively at inmates in their cells
>looks at me for a bit
>moves over next to me to the new guy pedro
>were all in the mental health wing so hes not too stable either
>had pedro put his dick through the bars and the guard sucks him off
>inmates hear this and cheer and hassle
>he does this a second time to pedro
>my mind twists this act into how my ex had cheated on me
>am depressed because "she" didnt pick me
>lay down and fall asleep quickly
>wake up next morning and im moved to the psych ward at the hospital

Wow, what the shit user.

You got mind fucked by someone so intent that he'd suck a dick just to piss you off. That's pretty hardcore.

i spent a couple weeks alone at the hospital in a criminal unit alone in a cell making sure i wasnt dangerous. the "solitary" added to my schizophrenia and by the time i got to the proper ward with other patients i was fully into a trip over freemasonry and shit
>meet patient on the first day
>comes to meet me in main dining room where im alone
>we start talking
>im very careful with my words now
>he seems to take a liking to me
>acts as if im some long lost reincarnation of him
>find out he was also in jail at one time
>we form a bond
>always wore a sweatband on his left wrist
>for some reason right after i met him he moved it to the right wrist while i was out and when we sat down lifted his sleeve to show me he had moved it
>he did this in an inconspicuous way as to not attract attention

There are alternative explanations other than that there was a guard who acted alone or as part of a conspiracy to fuck with you.

Honestly, this just sounds like paranoia, OP. I've been there too and I'm not trying to belittle you. It's a shitty thing to have.

my beliefs are it was a conspiracy, those mfs hated me to the core. i had lost my cookies in there and began doing insane stuff. i was naked about 90% of the time. i had flooded my cell which caused them to shut my sink off so i drank from a toliet. they then waited for me to use said toilet (which took a week) and shut that water off too so i couldnt drink from it. they spit in my food and labled it INRI because i was on a religious spiel (i did witness a miricle) but the worst part for them was that the inmates "liked" me. i would talk to them and even got an atheist to accept Jesus again (he was an old guy who was raised catholic, after our talk one day and after my explinations of faith he just broke down saying oh my god over and over and for the rest of the time there he started taking his meds again and praying) the guard called me "coon boy" cause my eyes had dark circles from banging my head and later on i was "the ghost of delta block" reaffriming my belief that i was dead and in pergatory. i could go on and on about the holding ceter, most of it i had mentally blocked or lost details but some is starting to come back

How are you feeling right now?

I went to jail. I was bored all the time and ate shit food. That's about it

i know most of it was paranoia now which upsets me because i was too scared at the time to take full note of what was happening and the lines were being blurred. one instance at the ward i dont get is after this old black guy came in, he kinda changed the atmosphere from a peaceful place of rehabilitation to "jail rlues" and we started to segregate the ward into black and white sections subconsciously. on his first day i remember he was drinking coffee and got up and started to do this strange zombie walk. he was an old nigga too, spoke only in jive the whole time. my friend there who had also been to jail i guess kinda understood jive and was able to pick up what he was putting down

woke

now? my life is great. good job, ive got two months clean time after going to horizons. i wrecked my car this summer (after all this bs happened) while i was on acid, had a bad trip, drove on the highway, rearended another car at 70mph. ive got a dwi case on my hands now but thats being complicated due to my prior arrest (the one ive been talking about) because that charge was dropped due to me being "mentaly unfit to stand trial". with this dwi case now it says i should be on meds to understand whats happening but i had an adverse reaction to my risperidal so now i cant take meds. but being clean has helped me a lot. weed fucks you up man no matter what people say, and abusing it is worse

>i know most of it was paranoia now which upsets me
I know what you mean. My psych stays weren't mainly for psychosis but I was prescribed anti-psychotics I just didn't take them because my stomach is weak.

I'm a lot better now but I get angry thinking about how much paranoia stole my life from me. It doesn't feel fair. I'd avoid a lot of great opportunities and basic things to help me grow in life because someone was planted to gather information on me to help spring a trap later on. I'd know from some little things they say or do. It sucks.

>weed fucks you up man no matter what people say, and abusing it is worse
Agreed. I don't smoke at all anymore. No psychedelics either and you'd probably be better off if you didn't either. I only do stimulants now, which probably isn't good either, but it at least doesn't get in the way of my basic life functioning.

I'm glad you're doing better.

i dont like that term because it reminds me of teens who drop cid and this they understand it all because theyve experienced time distortion. i wouldnt say woke, just more that im aware that evil does exist in this world and you get what you put out. my time in "purgatory" is because of my actions, which i am deservedly afflicted. i thank God every day for opening my eyes to the evil in this world and though i may not be able to stop it, and can change my own energy and put out what i believe to be good. i looked in to deaths eyes when i spoke to the mental health counselor in the holding center. she had no white in her eyes, pitch black, and she didnt want anything to do with me. i saw her again when he came in and i was laying naked on the floor asking to use the phine in jail, you do actually get the one call bs but youve gotta keep the paper they give you. while moving me around cell to cell they made me leave all my possessions i had (a blanket, cup, toothbrush, and that paper) behind. when i saw her again she was a caring compassionate woman, evil had left her

I was being ironic its a fucking stupid term if used seriously. The fluidity of time is indeed a son of a bitch though. Sounds like you got your head in the right place atm user keep it up.

i can no longer enter that state after my accident, it just brings back anxiety. its a strange world you enter and theres no way i can explain it

another story, with nick names
>in the ward
>its now me, my friend sam, this guy st. james, a crazy biracial bitch D, the old nigga, this younger quiet nigga, and sam 2
>st. james, sam, and a couple orderlies are talking in the main hall and acting funny, im hanging out with them
>the old nigga is in the common room watching tv right in eyesight of us
>the others are in their rooms
>the one orderly gets up from the cair and i see hes left a shaving razor behind
>they all glance at me real quick and i take it as my hint to get it
>i quickly jump into the cair but the old nigga saw the razor and get up and does a walk by giving me the worse stink eye id ever seen
>i hide the razor in my pants and soon we all move to the tv room
>while in there i put it into a news paper and try to give it back but the orderly wont take it so i move it into my sock
>next were in the "quiet room" me, sam, and the orderly who left the razor
>i flash him the razor at one point, and he does nothing about it
>after that we all go to our rooms, and as the old nigga walks by i accidentally drop it in my sink making a huge noise
>i hide it behind my books and the next day we went to rec
>when i get back from rec another orderly comes into my room and says
during checks we found this razor in your room, if you ever need one to shave just let us know and we'll get it for you
>tensions were high after that

This sums up my stay perfectly

Seymore-Baker?

st. james was in interesting character
>quiet white guy in his 20s
>very fit, very polite
>i knew he had been to at least the holding center because he had on the same ID wristband that i had on when i was there
>always walked with his hands behind his back
>would make strange hand motions while walking like this
>called me, and most others "brother"
>one day him and the old nigga got into an argument while waiting for coffee
>dont know how it started, but old nigga got real loud calling him a faggot as one does
>st.james never lost composure
>kept hands behind back at all times and calmly said something like "i mean no harm brother"
>old nigga goes "i am not your fucking brother"
>st. james says "you are my brother"
>again "i aint your fucking brother"
>again "you are my brother"
>nigga just goes "fuck you" and walks away to sit down

Sorry, Dont know

I went to jail, it was like being in daycare as an adult.
You sound like you experienced a paranoid break.

That's what happened to kyle odom

im currently reading the kyle odem thread on /x/, i do see some correlations but my parinoia has gone away for the most part. now im just curious about what the fuck happened to me. i know most of it was a psychotic drug induced break, but i know whats real and i know how these people acted. what did it mean

Mary
>Always did some weird hand signs at the cameras whenever in a room
> pointed at herself then some random person
>Nodded
> Returned to doing hand signs
>Wasn't ever anything close to sign language
> Squeezed my hands hard once under the table across from me and told me " they're watching us"
> her eyes were in full on panic
>She wouldn't let go
>Thought she was crazy
>Discharged
> As I'm discharged I learn her husband worked there and the workers watch all the cameras for abnormalities.
> She was reporting people breaking the rules

If the guard sucking dick thing was actually real, it was probably just a freaky guard and had nothing to do with you.

It meant you was fucked up in the head.
Seriously, other than that it didn't mean shit.
Now you know what to do, just like we told you, go do it.

i still dont understand the comment i was told before
>if youre good youll get a conjugal visit tonight
the way the one guard said it to me was in a tone that was just.. off

t. correctional officer

this is God. I'm sorry that I forgot about you. I'm not myself right now.

OP going to bed, fts, night