Hanging out with girl I've been close friends with for years

Mason Lewis
Mason Lewis

hanging out with girl I've been close friends with for years
not attracted to her at all
sitting down talking to her and out of nowhere she grabs my face and starts kissing me
half-heartedly kiss her back because don't want her to feel awkward
she gets on top of me and keeps kissing me
asks me to spend the night
ease her off and make up some bullshit excuse why I cant
leave her house and driving home thinking what the hell that was all about
think back and realize so many advances from her over the years that I was completely oblivious to
realize she mustered up so much courage to just lay it all out there like that and I just completely shot that shit down
firmly friendzoned and probably severely hurt somebody that has always been there for me

Feels fucking weird. Like a total role reversal from the way things were when I was getting rejected in my late teens/early 20's. I know what that feels like and it sucks thinking I just hurt someone close to me like that. Feels bad.

General feels thread I guess. Whats going on with you guys?

Jace Watson
Jace Watson

I'm taking a shit and thinking about what I'll make for dinner today.

Isaac Lee
Isaac Lee

Nice m8. What time is it where you're located?

Colton Ramirez
Colton Ramirez

Fucking blows dude but if you can't reciprocate the feelings then it's better to cut it off before she could get hurt more. It was hella brave of her to do that and props to her. Like damn. But in the end, its better if you don't fake it.

As far as feels for me? I just had arguably the best week of my life. Everything I have been working on in school paid off and now there's a good chance I can get a major publication deal worth some coin, three research papers, a letter of reference and summer work/experience. Plus some other shit that has happened to me. Not gonna lie, it was a fucked up long period of time for me and this past week has been such a 360 turn for me whenever I think of it too much I have to hold back crying from happiness

Lucas Johnson
Lucas Johnson

360 turn

Wyatt Collins
Wyatt Collins

Not understanding quantum turning

Aaron Nguyen
Aaron Nguyen

That does suck... oddly enough I've been on both sides of that situation before... and oddly more enough with the same girl at different times.

Isaac Hughes
Isaac Hughes

story time m8

Brayden Adams
Brayden Adams

see

Kevin Rogers
Kevin Rogers

plus some other shit that has happened to me
Do tell

Cooper Diaz
Cooper Diaz

Dude turn around an go back and fuck her. It's called a courtesy fuck, and tomorrow have a sit down with her and explain to her that this will not work. I know it sounds counterintuitive, but it is better for both of you if you have sex just once and then still remain friends

Colton Hernandez
Colton Hernandez

Must suck to have a girl come on to you

James Wood
James Wood

5 girls that i liked asked me if i did and said no and now im still a beta fuck who hasnt had sex since i was 12 and those memories are kinda shameful tbh

Tyler Young
Tyler Young

12?
greentext that shit

Robert Gonzalez
Robert Gonzalez

sounds like a bad plan dude. It's gonna hurt her bad and I'm not really into having casual sex anymore.

Lucas Kelly
Lucas Kelly

Probably going to be too long and boring, but sure
Be Me
Maybe 16
I've been friends with this chick since 6th grade
Gorgeous tall light skinned black girl "S"
She is a social out cast though, very shy
Get along with her because I get along with awkward people
I'm one of her few friends
She obviously likes me for years
I don't notice.
I'n 9th grade I'm obsessed with girl, lets call her Val
Just moved in next door to me, is my best friend, she is Ukrainian
Skinny and flat, but fucking godly in proportion, silky skin, legs of a super model
One of the few 10/10 girls I've ever been close with
Obviously I'm head over heals for her. In fact everyone assumes we are dating.
I eat lunch with S everyday though, and she seems to be getting mad at me when I invite her to join Val and the others
One day after school S and I are hanging out and she keeps getting closer
She grabs me in a tight hug for a while, I hug her back
I can tell she is nervous
She moves her head and kisses me... instantly "I'm sorry" and leaves
I try to be her friend, but she is just to awkward.

time goes on, Val and I still hang out all the time, but I fear I will never be more than a friend
push my luck, we do some stuff, kiss, cuddle, ect... as you do in 9th grade.
But she was just experimenting, it goes nowhere.
She starts dating another guy, things get awkward
By 10th grade we are arguing a lot, have to end things.
Devastated

It accrues to me how S must have flet
Start talking to her again
Start hanging out more
I start liking her
Not sure if she likes me
Try being a bit flirty with mixed results
One day we were joking around and laughing, and I just lean over and kiss her on the check
confusion.exe
oh shit
she did not like it

I explained things...
Was awkward, we were never as close

William Martinez
William Martinez

aww damn dude. You goofed

Brandon Ortiz
Brandon Ortiz

not fucking her and then breaking off the friendship

Easy there Chad, you might wanna take your bullshit over to /fit/.

Justin Taylor
Justin Taylor

Well, ya boi had yet another weekend of self loathing. Been a year since I'm kissed someone, that being my ex who broke up with me. I feel like I can't move on when I still can't stop thinking about her.

Ian Wilson
Ian Wilson

on a cruise
meet a girl in the kids group i went to to play vidya
meet girl
shes cute but its only a week so just made friends
become good friends and learn a lot about each other
shes two days younger and likes almost all things but she wasnt that into vidya
everyone gets their own room keys so kids stay out late
after one of the little partys in group we're eating food as usual around 1:30 a.m.
see her face as we're talking and she notices so we both go in for a kiss
she tells me her parents are in the casino deck and invites me to her room
honestly not sure what to expect, i hadnt discovered beating my meat yet
we get in there and start kissing awkwardly more cuz im semi-germaphobe and that shit was new
she notices my erection and grabs it asking if i know how to do it
reply no and she says shes seen it a few times and can show me
rubbing feels good so why not
we go straight into missionary and i go for like 8 minutes before i cum
dont remember pulling out rip
post-nut clarity wakes my anxiety realizing her family coming in is a possibility
i try to fix myself and the bed up and hug and kiss goodbye
relatively same remainder of the cruise
after its over realize i loved her and felt sad
mfw i miss you tasha
Realistically got over it but the memories are real gross 12 was not a good age to get succ would not recommend

Caleb Parker
Caleb Parker

I know how you feel.. The best you can do is try and take that pain, and turn it into a bit of anger, turn it into motivation to improve your self and your life, and move forward.

After my last big break up everyone was telling me "You'll fins someone new" and I know I will, but I could only think of wanting her. It was not until I let myself feel angry, than I could see what I needed to do to improve myself. And sure enough as I did that, I started to care about myself more, and being able to be happy with out other people. And it is that self assurance, that makes it easy to move on and find new people, and connect even deeper with the next one.

Asher Lopez
Asher Lopez

Yikes, that's cingey. Feel sorry for you user.

Noah Brown
Noah Brown

hella

Isaiah Taylor
Isaiah Taylor

Thanks for sound advice, man. Now to just try and actually hate.

Asher Sullivan
Asher Sullivan

You have to realize that whatever once was is gone. It sucks absolute shit but believe me i know and im still going through it. After i started to realize the pointlessness of dragging the regret sadness and self-blame on, i got a lot better. Its only been 5 months and i was with that girl for four of some very hard years.

Jason Gonzalez
Jason Gonzalez

The only positive to any of that was trips

Parker Peterson
Parker Peterson

Fuck, didn't even notice em. And 7s no less.

Thank you for more advice, man. I'm just taking g whatever might help at this point.

Ryan Taylor
Ryan Taylor

Well to hate is another thing. Honestly my ex and I had a smooth break up. She was very civil about how she did it, and even stayed one more night. We continued to be friends, hanging out often, and even sleeping in the same bed and cuddling from time to time.

I don't know if I would have actually gotten over her if things continued like that. She started to see a new guy, and we were still insisted on hanging out, obviously no cuddling or anything like that. It tour me up a bit but I understood, and I started to think about dating others.

One night out of the blue she just cut ties completely though. I was mad because she told me so many times she wanted to be friends, and I had made sure to not be a burden, I never talked to her or hinted at feelings for her, or was not clingy at all.. because she was such a good friend.

What ever happened, idk if it made her new bf uncomfortable, or if she felt guilty, or what not... But I'm glad it did, because after a few low weeks and a lot of gin and Whisky... I cleaned up and feel like a new person this past month,

So don't lose hope.. and donn't feel like you have to hide behind hate either

Anthony Scott
Anthony Scott

This is why I love these threads. I appreciate hearing input from other people who've had similar experiences. Thank you man,

Angel Jones
Angel Jones

No problem... Someone has to look out for us..

I'm amazed how common it is, that is a girl breaking a long term relationship, and the guy being taken by surprise.. and just kind of broken.

I know so many people who this seems to have happened to at lest once or twice. Maybe its just a by product of supply and demand, the average female has more power to find a long term relationship than the most alpha of chads.

Ethan Brown
Ethan Brown

Compare this, the way a guy reacts to friendzoning a girl and vise versa. Yet it's the guys who are considered heartless

Samuel Carter
Samuel Carter

I'm socially inept due to losing all confidence after a bad first year of high school, bad grades and low social status after being the king of primary school.
The lack of confidence led to depressive moods and suicidal thoughts.
friend introduces me to his old school friends via Skype. Get along real well with them.
Eventually start talking to one of the girls more and more each day. Become best friends.
We meet once and hung out. Was real awkward but was nice to see her in person.
This year I tell her i like her, she feels the same way. Never been happier.
We went out for a few dates, had first kiss, oral and grinding, never fucked because no condoms.
I'm not allowed to have a girlfriend, strict mother.
Eventually she found me looking at a picture of her.
She felt betrayed, basically disowned me.
Mother treats me differently.
The psychological struggle between the love from a girl and the love from a mother killed my brain. >Eventually breakdown and cave. >Break up with girlfriend.
Never talk to those friends again. >Mother treats me basically the same as when I was in a relationship.
Never felt more alone.

I don't love her, I don't miss her. I just want to be loved and be normal.

Aiden Anderson
Aiden Anderson

I think this kind of stuff is just part of life. I hope you can look back and remember the good memories you two have. You should really try to stay friends with her.

I was in a similar situation with my friend M. But after a year of college I realized I didn't want to date anyone there, and I can home and asked her out. We've been dating for over a year now. You really never know whats going to happen in life.

Brandon Long
Brandon Long

HOLY SHIT MAN.
Move out the day you turn 18
Seriously your mother is psychotic, go to college, take loans, work. Just get away from her

Parker Myers
Parker Myers

It's been a handful of years now. I've had 2 serious relationships since. I think she has had one, but I don't know how it ended.

I still talk wit her on Facebook from time to time, we go to different colleges but are still decently local, and studying in the same field. We even hung out a few times after high school, but it's been at lest a year or two now.

Thinking about asking if she want's to get lunch at some point... but I'll have to talk with her a little and kind of feel things out.

Luckily I've learned a lot about reading nuance since 10th grade. kek

Liam Gomez
Liam Gomez

Yeah see

You should try to start talking with that group again... It's going to be hard and awkward, and maybe not end well for you... but talk to your ex, be honest and explain what happened. Just being honest and forth coming can be hard, but is probably the most important thing in any close relationship

Jason Howard
Jason Howard

I wish the best for you man, good luck with S.

Do you have any tips on reading woman? I honestly can't tell shit. To the point where M has admitted to being miserable for week. Apparently it was because I was late too many days and she interpreted that as me not caring/loving her.

Adrian Ramirez
Adrian Ramirez

I agree with this guy, sit her down in person and explain the whole situation from the beginning. It's not going to be easy but I can guarantee you will feel better afterwards. You were forced to break up with her so hopefully she doesn't blame you. I imagine she's confused and hurt but talking will help.

Aiden Mitchell
Aiden Mitchell

Got a 2k scholarship, job and more

Adam Diaz
Adam Diaz

Same, except I'm on year 5. How's that for feels?

Jason Clark
Jason Clark

I have nothing in particular to say... I've just always got along with girls, most my closest friends have always been girls. They feel comfortable around me, and I guess I'm kind of lucky because both my exs were with me because they knew me first... I'm not bad looking, they are just way out of my "league" from a shallow surface level sense.

What I can say is that being open and honest is just the most important thing. Establish that if she is down, or if you do something she does not like, that she can bring it up to you civilly.
Tell her that you struggle to see things the way she does, and that if you do something, it's not because you don't care. If you want to be with her, and you do care about her, actually listen to these things, and when she sees you do listen and do care, she will be better able to see your side of things. You aren't late because you don't care but because you are busy... Make it aparent you rather be home with her than out late at work.

Honestly the best time to bring these things up is while laying in bed cuddling.

if you can communicate with someone at this fundamental level, things work out better. For me when I'm out driving with someone at like 2am, that's when I can just understand things.

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