>be me >sitting at home watching Big Mouth on Netflix >doorbell rings >open it to see a guy holding a bucket >asks me if I could make a donation to the local hospital to afford a new sperm storage freezer in their fertility lab >timeformydailycommunityservice.jpg >tell him to hold on as I close the door >head to my bathroom with a fitness magazine >spend about 3 minutes beating my dick harder than a Muslim beating his wife for wearing shorts >hereitcomes.gif >jizzum in a solo cup >quickly throw on my pants >run back to the door with solo cup in my hand >see guy with the bucket just walking away to the next house >yell "Hey faggot!" >he looks around confused >I run over to him with the cup >I dump it into the bucket >his face is a combination of shock, horror, and disgust >he says nothing and proceeds to the next house >I walk back in my house >I resume watching my Netflix show >I lay back in my recliner with a smile on my face knowing I just earned my ticket to heaven >mfw
Landon Nelson
kek
Adrian Allen
fucking christ user
Andrew Harris
>anything.anyextension >mfw
Isaiah Lopez
Someone needs to screencap this shit
Jackson Roberts
top tier
Evan Ortiz
moar. we need moar
Jeremiah Brown
I will gladly make moar donations, if you wish
Kevin Perry
>spend about 3 minutes beating my dick harder than a Muslim beating his wife for wearing shorts
fucking hell
Austin Turner
Kaio-kek^10
Easton Mitchell
Does anyone have a screen cap of yesterday's thread where the guy made a ball of his own semen?
Elijah Edwards
bump
Jayden Ross
Noice
Mason Mitchell
...
William Reyes
bump
Thomas Adams
This fucking thread feels like it was made by bots. Wtf
Austin Davis
Trust me man, I'm not a bot.
Joseph Torres
...
Hunter Ortiz
...
Logan Scott
Bump
Jack Robinson
fuck
Xavier Wood
Holy shit put me in the screencap
Alexander Watson
...
Levi Anderson
OP here. If any of you guys screencap this, post the final version in this thread. One of my biggest life goals is to have one of my greentexts become famous on Sup Forums.
Samuel James
Some top quality greentext >today >going to store to get food >get my things and proceed to checkout >my bagger is a tard >lolniggawut.png >an actual fucking tard in the flesh >never seen a tard in person >short neck, box head, spaced eyes, special bicycle helmet >reach for my cart and talk to the tard >"how long have you worked here?" >speaks in tongues and tardonese >puts up both hands "dis many, eleven" >has held a job for 11 years >he grabs my wrist and starts screaming >"LET GO OF THE CART IM NOT DONE YEET" >robotanal.wav >scared out of my mind, tard strength crushes my wrist >tard wranglers hired by store pry him off >hear him screaming "YEET YEET PARAKEET" as he's being dragged off >got the fuck out of there >go to my car >look in the bags >mfw all my shit was smashed up >tfw I can never shop there again
