I JUST SAW THIS EXACT SAME KIND OF SNAKE GOING DOWN MY BASEMENT!!!!!!!!!

I JUST SAW THIS EXACT SAME KIND OF SNAKE GOING DOWN MY BASEMENT!!!!!!!!!
PLEASES HELP!! WHAT DO I DO?
IM SCARED TO DEATH AND MY DOGS IS IN FULL DEFENSIVE MODE AND WON'T SCREWING AROUND THE DOOR. FUCKING HELP!!!!

snakes are allergic to cum, you just need to cum on it and it'll run away or die

Have you called animal control user?

Fuck it to show whos boss.

Isnt that a black racer? Those things are borderline harmless

I love you, Sup Forums.

No, and my mom isn't home.

It's a racer... Chill the fuck out

Spray bottle o' Raid should do the trick

You see a problem, I see a free fleshlight

Forgot to mention: non-venomous. Calm down, nigger

Omg OMG omg am fucking shaking

Call 911 and ask for their animal control. Tell them you have a snake if youre too puss to fish it out.

If youre not get a cardboard box and try leading it into it. Make sure its in all the way before closing it.

>run away and then die.
There ya go fixed that for ya...

Its highly venomous. You're probably gonna die OP.

Am too scared am not even going close to the door am standing in our drawing table

Where are you located OP?

>my mom isn't home

Hasn't been bitten ya fucking faggot

No fucking doing that, I think I am gonna run outta my home

how are you gonna cum on it from there?

man up faggot. get some porn on your phone, start jerking it, and then slam open the door and cum right in its eyes

Probably won't help. If you have seen one then that means there is a high probability that you have more than one racer in your house.

If that's the snake you saw just leave it totally harmless

San Antonio, Tx

Wtf dude don't talk shit am fucking gonna cry

Post picture of the snake

almost 3 in the morn wtf are you doin? lock up and worry about it when you wake up

Call the cops dude.

Not a big deal. I live in Florida and whenever we get the newspaper sometimes I find one sleeping under it.

Got a pot stash youre afraid theyll find?

Black = Venomous
Snake or Skin.
Kill.

It's in the fucking basement and am no fucking way even getting close to that

Damn nice black snake ya got there user... How can white snakes even compete?

Have you tried shoving it up your ass?

I'm too fucking scrared like am choking

im not joking op
call the police theyll get rid of it

get a hoe or shovel and kill it? if you saw one theres usually another close by. probably in your bed most likely.

Fucking hell duddeeee

Put on shoes or some boots with a long leg pants, get a flash light and get your ass down there with a knife or bat and kill it

Lol

Snakes understand some english so if you keep yelling at it to leave, it might. Then again, snakes can be very stubborn so it might not. Just don't step on it.

Am not some fucking redneck dude am a weak lil white boy. Fuck that

trips of truth

why you scared of kevin durant

...

Obviously, got some other shit.

You just buy a fucking aardwolf!

Jesus, you guys are stupid.

checked

Lol

get a box, find snake, put box over snake, put something heavy on box

If I were in your situation, I would either call animal control like these niggers here are saying, or I would make sure there is no way the snake can leave the basement, so you close all the doors, stuff the gap under the door if it makes you feel better, make sure you plug any gaps it can crawl out of, then get some paper or a white board and write that there is a snake down there. Finally, there is one more crucial step to making sure you wont get bit.


Cum on the snake.

My dogs gsd but she's just 15months old and dumb as shit. Should I unleash her on it?

You're a fuckin' pussy cunt

Hahahahahahahaahah im crying with laughter

Cumming near it would kill it?

Dogs understand some english so just calmly explain the situation to her. She'll let you know what she thinks is best.

Ahahah you guys are killing me

ideally right on it, but near might do the job

You need to stop dude im trying to go to sleep you keep making me laugh

But, what if it fucking bits me?

Ask your dog to distract him and sneak behind his ass

I got this.

1.stfu and grow a pair
2.This sounds crazy but trust me. Get naked(snakes fear skin)
3.Put mustard in to a boot(snakes love mustard and dark spaces)
4.Get a small trampoline and cover it in Vaseline
5.Grab your cock and do the helicopter trick(you know swing your little willy in circle)

The snake will try to bit your willy, you jump to side and the snake hits the trampoline and fly's into the mustard boot. You now have the snake trapped.

Dude this is why i said wear some boots and a long legged pants or jeans

Lol you fucking troll im dying

...

I swear to God Fred, fuck your weird ass traps. Ever since shaggy got you on weed you been weird as hell.

Lmfaoooooooo

Lol this one of the funniest thread ever

Snakes have three types of bites:

-nips

-grabs

-rEAL bites

Yuo only have to be sacared of the rEAL bites; nips are just testing touches ans whule the poinson will still get in your vein it'll only hurt a little and he wont' really mean it

-grabs are when they do a hard nipp and try to wiggle around your body to crush you to death. You might have to worry about that with your fragile womanly frame btu I think a t owrst he'll cut off circulation in tyour legs

fINALLY is the rEAL bite

***VERY DANGEROUS***
He chomps you as hard as possible, on the balls, the hand, or even the legs He just goes for broke and really getss in there and bites real dang hard tryin to get ya it's like a nip but from hell and I think this is what you're afraid of
the trick is when they do a rEAL bite their mouth openes way wideer and if your timing is good you can come right in its venom sacs and neutralize the poison, killing the sanake

i wish you luck; may you only feel a nip

Dude lol cumming on a snake is deadly lolololol

for the snek

By now im guessing there might more than one snake down your basement if i were you i would get my knife or machete and chop that fuck i hate snakes

>make dog protective mask out of plywood
>lead dog to snake with treats
>distract snake with defense dog
>sneak behind snake
>quickly cum at least near but preferably on said snake, vanquishing it for good

No for you it will grab your c@ck and bit that shit lol

Lol you need to stop man cumming on snake really lol

yeah they're known to multiply quite quickly in times of distress if you don't hurry the babies might climb places; snakes can carry egg sacks in their bodies that only burst during signs of danger

Dude you will die if you don't get your ass down there

Well user is fucked

Wtf?

Does your basement have some cracks and holes or too much trash?

Do you mean to say that that snake have been living down there with probably few others?

Oh boy he's fucked

Harmless snake, just grab it and throw it outside in the grass.