What is the dirtiest/weirdest thing you have done during sex and did you enjoy it?
I haven't done it yet but my girlfriend agreed to let me pee in her vagina the next time we meet up so I'm lookig forward to that.
Share your experiences because I need ideas!
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Bitch's pussy smelled and still went down on her because I was horny. Worst decision I've ever made during sex. To this day I think I still have the smell of her pussy on my face.
My wife pee'd on me once. Didn't really enjoy it. Not my cup of, haha, tea.
Damn man you know she had to of smelled that shit when you came back up to kiss her. Did she have anything to say about it?
I wonder if females become unaware of their own scent even if it is foul
Nope, she licked my face clean after she came all over it. That girl was a fucking freak.
...
A couple of one's I know definitely are. Not just aware - more like self-conscious.
Is it that hard to keep a pussy clean ? I keep my asshole and balls clean as fuck.
I've done that. Also in her ass. She pisses while I'm inside her, too. It's fucking hot. Literally.
Was it like licking a nine volt
It's really not if she's attentive. All she needs to do is clean her pussy with anti-bacterial soap, warm/hot water, and a cloth.
One of my girlfriends had a rough sex fetish (yeah i know all do, but this one was next level), one time she asked me to "rape" her a random night around 03:00, like in waking her up slapping and tossing her around, tie her hands with a ziplock, gag her and fuck her silly.
fucked her ass with a dildo while fucking her pussy.
fucked her pussy with a dildo while fucking her ass.
i'm into pretty vanilla shit here.
Eeewwwwwwww
Sex in the missionary position for the sole purpose of procreation.
It was worse.
This would be funny, if people actually referred to piss as "tea".
But it's not, and they dont. Don't quit your day job, user.
I fuck my fat gf's belly all the time. Armpits, too. Sometimes I stuff her panties in her pussy.
>hanging out with junkie girl
>she has tracks (bruises/scars from needles along a vein) on her neck, which i think is sexy
>girl is just as much of a hardcore junkie as me
>as invariably happens when you sit around doing huge amounts of oxy, coke, and crack with a girl.. SexyTime.Begin. even if you're a 2 and she's an 8.
>she wants to shoot up during
>fuck yeah
>while fucking and shooting up, she says to backdraw a full rig of a blood
>she does, i do
>then we fill up a couple more
>proceed to squirt eachothers blood all over our bodies
>fuck covered in eachothers blood
nice girl, but she got arrested and i never saw her again
>nice girl
Mmkay
Just a heads up OP, when you have an erection, your body cuts off the urinary tract. It's not impossible to urinate with a hard on, but it's difficult. It might even hurt. It also might kill your boner. Not permanently, I'm just letting you know the mechanics so if you're there with a softie and she's wondering why, it's biological maaan.
You could go reverse, nut first, then as your dick is cooling off piss right in her, that would clean out some extra jizz right into her, if you want to come inside her anyway. Oh yea, keep that in mind too, don't piss in her after ejaculation if you don't want any getting in.
>A boy falls in love with a girl.
>Unable to confess, he is gifted by a deus ex machina with the girl's phone number.
>Never minding the strange area code, he immediately calls her, and is overjoyed to find out that she has a crush on him as well.
>But, the next day, when he recounts the previous day's confessions to the girl, she only looks at him with a perplexed expression.
>After some investigation, he finds out that the girl he called is not the same girl he fell in love with.
>In fact, she doesn't exist in this universe at all. She is the girl's alternate universe counterpart, who has fallen in love with the MC's own AU self, who too is blissfully unaware of her crush.
>Hijinks ensue as the two strike up a deal to give each other their darkest, most private secrets in order to equip the other with the weapons they need to conquer the heart of their other selves.
>While the two chase their respective loved ones, DRAMA ensues as they begin to fall in love with each other instead and question the NATURE of LOVE.
>Don't quit your day job, user.
Wasn't planning on it. Comedy is kinda overcrowded anyway.
A _____ falls in love with a _____.
Unable to _____, _____ is gifted with by a _____ machina with the _____'s phone number. Never minding the strange _____, _____ immediately calls _____, and is overjoyed to find out that _____ has a _____ on _____ as well.
But, the next day, when _____ recounts the previous day's _____ to the _____, _____ only looks at him with a _____. After some investigation, _____ finds out that the _____ _____ called is not the same _____ he fell in love with. In fact, _____ doesn't exist in this _____ at all. _____ is the _____'s alternate _____ counterpart, who has fallen in love with the _____'s own _____, who too is blissfully unaware of _____ crush.
Hijinks ensue as _____ strike up a deal to give each other their darkest, most private _____ in order to equip the other with the _____ they need to conquer the heart of their _____. While _____ chase their respective _____, _____ ensues as they begin to fall in love with each other instead and question the _____ of _____.
yeah thats right, i knew lots of junkies that were good people, guys and girls.
I have anal sex with a female friend to ease her constipation.
Mine doesn't. I can piss rock hard, no problem. Comes in handy...
Stop posting that because it's already a thing.
I found a girl to let me do it, i was inside her for 20 minutes trying to get the pee to come out. Any tricks? I came inside her after awhile to try and go soft to pee inside too but nothing.
>Keit-ai is a meme
>a manga
>a wordpress story
>a record breaking animated feature
It truly finds a way
I do this for my gf
*highfive*
You need to do dildo and cock in the same hole for a change. Then throw another dildo in the other hole.
I find that I have to hold still with no stimulation. It takes a couple minutes to get the piss flowing. Doesn't matter if I'm in her pussy, ass, or mouth. I just need to hold my cock still and have her not stimulate me. I can usually stay hard and start pissing. Starts off slowly, but then you can ramp up the flow.
*highfive*
Thought i was the only one.
Shaggy Dramatically Reads Keit-Ai.
...
For some reason I dont understand, I picked up a bottle of aerosol spray on suncreen in a metal bottle and put in my girlfriends vagina. Was going to town on her with it and she seemed to like it until either her or me (dont remember) pressed the end of the bottle which shot sunscreen inside of her vagina and she started crying because it burned so bad. Meanwhile, Im kind of freaking out because we had been dating for like a month and her mom was nosey as fuck (at her moms place) and I had no idea on what I was going to tell a doctor as to how sunscreen got sprayed all in her vagina. Douching didnt occur to me. Luckily she felt better after a couple minutes.
If you're talking about with morning wood, or a piss boner those aren't the same thing. Morning wood isn't a real erection.
Two muscles are used in an erection, one muscle we have is tense almost all the time and hold blood back from the spongy penis meat. The other lifts the cock up. Morning wood is a time when the penis muscle is actually relaxing and letting blood fill up the penis, but the erection muscle isn't cutting off the urine flow. And a piss boner is kinda similar, just a distress situation like a full fire hose.
But if you mean full on horny erection, urinate no problem. Well then. I don't know if it's bad for you, maybe your urethra is routed a little differently or something. I guess you can use this power for good or evil.
Sup Forums.
the place to find jokes about minor genitals.
You sound like a boring sod
I hope you got tested for HIV after that...
Mind over matter? I dunno, I've never had a problem pissing when I'm hard. Just have to concentrate for a second to get it started.
Or any of the hepatitis and diabetes
Diabetes? You're high?
Ahhahahahahahahahaha sex hahahahaha
That probably means the tension muscle that raises the cock in erection has gone down, but the blood is still in the penis so you're still engorged.
You know how you can make your dick bounce up and down with a muscle when you're hard, if you can make that dick bounce and piss, then that's something, because that's the muscle that normally cuts off the flow.
No.. diabetes is contagious you stupid twat
I use my power for evil, and piss all over and inside my GF. She likes it because she's a kinky bitch.
Yeah right...
Durkey dur durr me no think diabetes bad dirkey Durka DUUURRRR
just urinate on anyone you can when you go in to walmart. it's better to do it in the produce section.
What's wrong with you are you a leaf or something
why its not like i injected it; didn't share needles
and f->m vaginal transmission is virtually impossible
but anyway yeah ive been tested since, completely clean
From experience. It's hard as fuck to piss when your dick is rock hard. I don;t know the human anatomy well enough to know why but trust me it's much harder (almost painful) to piss while your hard as fuck. Try it in the shower so you don't look/feel like an asshole if you can't perform.
When fucking with blood, even the tiniest scratch can be enough to get infected.
Fuck, if you were shooting up with her moments before that, if some got over the injection point, the puncture would've definitively been fresh enough for getting it.
or a plane could have crashed through the roof and killed me
>anti-bacterial soap
No no no. That is how you get infections.
back to le reedit
But that's severely unlikely statistically.
I've never been much for anything too dirty or weird. Probably because I haven't had enough sex in my life to get bored, definitely not long enough with the same person.
I have found that although I'm not into choking in any way. I really like holding a girl by the throat during sex. Very gently, but in control. I also found I can get any girl wet by working her neck. Like that's really the secret erogenous zone. I don't mean just kissing it, but blowing on her neck, getting some heat going, if you can give a shoulder massage, work the neck softly, blow on her ears, kiss them a bit, then kiss her neck, shit you will see her making life decisions at that point. Like you've just flipped the switch to on and now she's gotta figure out if it's your dick or her vibrator at home that's going to finish what you started, but it is fucking ON.
How the fuck do you figure? My girlfriend used it and never once got an infection. Unless she was giving herself rashes from rubbing the cloth too hard against her crotch.
You're talking about 2 junkies who fuck and probably share a needle. There's nothing a little blood sex is going to introduce that they hadn't already shared.
exactly
so is catching a disease from skin contact through a tiny holy thats not even bleeding any more
i never shared a needle with anyone, even girls i was dating and fucking raw all the time.
Are you talking about externally or internally? Externally is fine but internally is fucking terrible. Those are delicate mucus membranes that have a delicate ecosystem of good bacteria keeping it clean. Douches fuck it up and cause a bunch of problems down the track.
He daughter was asleep in the bed next to us. I rubber her clit and slit when I was on top from the back, and eventually when she woke up I make lewd faces at her and stared into her eyes as I came. She was maybe 5. Never spoke of it again.
Are you trying to say disease transmission among intravenous drug users isn't a statistically significant phenomenon?
". One recent study found that 64.7 percent of IDUs who had been injecting for 1 year or less were already infected with the virus. Overall prevalence of HCV was 76.5 percent among IDUs who had been injecting drugs for 6 years or less."
Externally. Internal requires a different method. Tampons are the reason my girlfriend prefers the vaginal pad.
disease transmission among IDUs who never share a needle with absolutely anyone and only have insertive vaginal sex isn't worse than the general population no
plenty of junkies are stupid enough to share needles, i'm not.
Far too many hippy or grotty girls use this as an excuse not to wash and get stank vag, there is nothing wrong with washing the entrance, the flaps and folds with warm water and scent free soap
There is a difference between general cleanliness and shoving a garden hose in there on full blast
You're spraying each other's blood all over yourselves. Each of you have fresh punctures from your IV drug use. The odds of a drop of blood getting on your track marks are definitely higher than those of getting hit by a plane.
Add to that the fact that you're both IV drug user and having unprotected sex with someone you barely know, and the odds of one of you having some blood borne disease are quite higher than regular joe getting HIV by fucking some random whore without a condom.
But then, having been an IV drug user too, I can understand reckless behavior. Still, getting HIV or hepatitis and wasting away for years is another thing than dying of OD. When I was using, I couldn't have cared less about not waking up after doing too much dope in one shot. Having OD'd a few times, I'd say the unpleasant part of ODing is waking up from the narcan shot, or on the floor in a pool of your own vomit.
But the idea of a disease killing me slowly is definitely less appealing.
what's a he daughter?
Wife had a seizure during sex. Clamped down so hard on my cock I couldn't pull out and it forced me to cum in her. When the other part of the seizure kicked in, she became very limp so I could pull out, but she pissed on me. She felt really bad when she recovered. I just treated her good and love her - not her fault.
Another time, I took a sleeping pill to get more rest. She had some weird partial seizure at night and ended up blowing me for hours in our sleep. I woke up with half a purple cock, teeth marks and bleeding, painfully sore, and really turned on. Every step I took gave me a painful erection. Was purple for several days. Painful for a week. She didn't remember doing it and woke with a sorry jaw and odd taste in her mouth. We don't do oral or anal sex, either. So, it was a surprise for the both of us.
>Each of you have fresh punctures from your IV drug use. The odds of a drop of blood getting on your track marks are definitely higher than those of getting hit by a plane.
those punctures are tiny and clots close them in seconds.
the transmission odds can't possibly approach anything that's reasonable to worry about
>Add to that the fact that you're both IV drug user and having unprotected sex with someone you barely know, and the odds of one of you having some blood borne disease are quite higher than regular joe getting HIV by fucking some random whore without a condom.
It's really not.
>But then, having been an IV drug user too, I can understand reckless behavior. Still, getting HIV or hepatitis and wasting away for years is another thing than dying of OD. When I was using, I couldn't have cared less about not waking up after doing too much dope in one shot. Having OD'd a few times, I'd say the unpleasant part of ODing is waking up from the narcan shot, or on the floor in a pool of your own vomit.
I've been shooting up for 14 years and have had plenty of unprotected sex with girls that shot up too
i've never overdosed and i've never contract hepc, aids, gonorrhea, syhphilis, chlamydia, hpv, or herpes.
Kek. Wat the fuck.
Probably not even washing it with water tbh.
>She had some weird partial seizure at night and ended up blowing me for hours in our sleep
First time I've heard of this shit.
went ass to mouth.
I do this too. It's so humiliating to her.
>the transmission odds can't possibly approach anything that's reasonable to worry about
I think the odds aren't as low as you seem to think they are... but then, I'm not a doctor, so who knows, maybe you're the one who's right.
I just can't help but think of other things going wrong with playing with blood-filled needles while having blood. Even if the odds of getting infected are that low, a small unfortunate movement and then the odds are pretty high again...
What's your belly-fucking technique? I could get into doing this
Her belly button is wide enough and deep enough to get the head of my cock in, so I usually do that. Sometimes fuck her fat folds, but I usually go for the hole. She hates it when I cum in it.
not me
me
It depends on how fat she is, but I usually have her kind of sit up so there's a fold, then fuck her belly button.
I've always wanted to piss in a cunt, but it just seems to fucked.
fair enough. but consider too it was a one-off thing, not something i ever got to do regularly.
...
can confirm nice girls and crack heads are synonymous.
>be me
>be 22 yr old working for company as supervisor
>new hires come thru
>hell yea get to teach idiots shit about computers, fun day
>new hires pair up 1 to each supervisor (3 supers)
>i get this girl, probably in her late 20's, she never told me her age. her name was C
>C knows her shit, tells me everything i'm doing and why, said she used to build computers for people back in the day
>we bullshit for a good 4 hours until lunch and she invites me for a smoke
>a smoke
>i was thinking cigarette, hoping for a blunt >nope.jpg
>its a chicken bone
>never smoked crack wasn't gonna start today
>C sparks up while i hit a cig, we're in her car
>asks if im doing anything that night
>yea coming over to your house
>C agrees
ff to that night
>C already left work after lunch i got her number and she texts me her address
>tells me to bring some green
>bring what i had on me, a blunt
>i get to her house, old double wide trailer
>literally only has 2 rooms, a living room and her bedroom
>we chill in the living room on the only couch, i spark the blunt
>says she doesnt like to smoke weed
>why did you want me to bring some
>says she wouldnt have any for me and she knows i dont smoke crack
>i hit the blunt, she hits her pipe
>we talk (she fucking runs her mouth seemingly without remembering to breath) until C decides its time to give me head
>mfw i approve
>C sucks me off, i can never nut from head though, she's nothing special either
>seems dissapointed i tell her its not her fault, jack off and bust on her face
>she lets me stay there for the night, we end up fucking from midnight to 5 or 6 that morning
>she makes breakfast, tells me thanks for the company and sends me on my way
that entire night was dope as hell but unfortunately she got into a car accident not long after and quit coming to work, we never met up again. she was a nice girl
Wut?
Children discovering ancient knowledge for the first time...
The neck is not a secret erogenous zone, it's a fucking great big obvious erogenous zone that has always been known as an erogenous zone by countless generations.
Read newer romantic fiction user, you're well behind the curve.
Did a piss enema. It felt good doing it. She said it felt good. Ended in disaster. Would not do again.
>>fuck covered in eachothers blood
hnng
a leaf on the wind...
Drank all of my wife's piss. She let it go right in my mouth and I swallowed as it came. We were in the bed and I did it half because I didnt want to get the bed wet, and half because I wanted to drink her.
>She had some weird partial seizure at night and ended up blowing me for hours in our sleep
Its okay, we are all Sup Forumsros here. You stuck it in her mouth an she freaked, you popped her in the face she had a seizure on your cock again.
>plenty of junkies are stupid enough to share needles, i'm not.
I kept my kit separate from my wife. Still got hepC. Bitch got into my kit and used one of my needles when I was asleep. Fortunately, I've only tested positive for antibodies. All of my viral load tests for the past 15 years have been clear, thank god.
She was a freak, though. She'd do anything, MFFs, anal, etc... The only thing she had an issue with was my fingers up her ass. Toys, my cock, and everything else were okay. She also really got off on watersports.
>She had some weird partial seizure at night and ended up blowing me for hours in our sleep.
That's what she said...
Let my gf fingerbang my prostate during a bj. Was hot but painful. If I ever do again will tell the girl only use 1 finger.
Pissed on each other a few times.
Want to chow down on Dat ass next kinky time.
Well, since my gf is my first, I can't talk about much.
I put my finger up her ass and felt the shit inside her.
Didn't care, kept on fucking, was still in full boner mode.
Question:
I'm 21 and lost my virginity with that age.
Always had lots of female friends tho, which didn't just question my virginity, they straight-up called it a lie until I insisted that I am.
Am I still normal, or considered a beta?