Whats the fastest way to kys without your parents knowing

Whats the fastest way to kys without your parents knowing
Sup Forums

Wait until they die of old age then kill yourself with whatever

Cant wait

Wave a cellphone at a MuriKKKan policeman.

No americans in Bulgaria, i can wave a pistol and they wont give a shiat

How can you kill yourself if you're already dead inside?

Kill your outside to complete the cyrcle

Halp

what?

Use a strip to block the main vein leading from the heart through your neck into your brain. It's painless, and you will die within 20 seconds.

Just make sure the vein is exposed properly (use your fingers to push it forward, preferably in front of your wind pipe) and make sure to strap it as tight as it goes.

stab parents, wait till dead, then proceed to stab self. They'll never know you offed yourself

Go to different town, jump in wood chipper.

Theres no towns in my country

eat 100gram of dog sperm

Disnt work

Doggophil

OP, visit your guidance counselor and talk to them about what makes you feel this way. You are young, things do get better. Talk to someone, please my friend.

Disappear in the ocean

Already cut my toung cant talk to anyone

Damn. Well please text a helpline, d00d. Wednesday is coming up soon

No worries then, you will be bleeding to death shortly.

Stupid get cocaine and hookers and tequila ... It will change ur mind

Didnt help last 5 years

Did ya try it?

Yeah, pbbly doing it wrong send me a tutorial with details

Did your parents notice?

If you do it wrong then you would have suffered severe brain damage,

It's really hard to fuck up

They dont live with me

Damn... How about anti depressant medication? What happen to you anyways why so serious?

I assumed you were an underagefag. Youre parents will know youre missing at some point if they aren't shitty parents, in which case why would you care? Maybe if you sent them a letter saying youre moving to france or some shit then mutilate yourself somehow beyond identification.

My 1080ti ran out of cooler paste, so i ran to the shop asked for one and the owner said im not a gamer if i havent try a suicide

Im 21 m9

Are there wood chippers?

Theres no wood only chippers

Just.move to.germany

And live with 58% gipseys, i prefer antractida

I think bout laying in the snow falling asleep

Kill them first, then kys

I really did not find this funny.

Its written by a 6yo what do u expect

Well shit.... Maybe fly to some sunny place where people are friendly

Hi

...

Start telling people you have information on hillary clinton that can send her to prison. Shouldn't take long.

Kys parents then kys

I better hang myself then wait 21 more years

not suicidal in the least bit but it does cross my mind if i'm diagnosed with a terminal illness or something like that. i'm terrified of reaching the age where i won't be able to take care of myself either.

i wouldn't want to hurt the ones i love either. so my plan is to score some heroin(enough to undoubtedly overdose on) and wander far far far into the wilderness or desert and shoot up and let the coyotes and nature do the dirty work. maybe my body will be found years down the road but the cause of my death would more than likely remain unknown.

Thats the dumbest idea yet, die like a wild pice of shit with heroin in the veins. You stuped

>find a concrete block
>take boat out to a lake
>tie the concrete block to your feet
>zip-tie your hands behind your back (this is optional)
>roll yourself into the water
>leave a suicide note on the boat if you wish
>parents will never know and they may never find your body

Cutting both your legs and hands will be painless

Don't tell them after you've done it.

Ok we found the solution.
You won my respect bro

Step in front of an oncoming plane.