What is the fastest way to get THC out of your body?

What is the fastest way to get THC out of your body?

Discontinue ingestion of marijuana and wait 4 to 24 weeks depending on usage.

Die

meth

Not being a fuckin' pothead.

drain your blood, insert new blood (that doesn't have drugs in it)

Suck a lot of dicks...

drink a lot of green tea

this

exsanguination

Weed doesn't stay in your system for that long after quitting.

leeches

Exhale

Missing some crucial info OP jesus fuck
Why do you need it out?
How soon do you need it out?
How much do you smoke?
How fat are you?
How much are you willing to spend?

If you down bout a shot glass of bleach it'll do you well

Quality advice from Sup Forums, as expected.

um... just used the marijuana central calculator and these are my results

Dialysis with new blood, enema, full body scrub, shaving of all body hair

Physical exercise. Literally burning fat. Sweating doesn't speed if up. Legitimately the only way to speed up the process of getting it out of your body. Sorry op... There is no quick fix other than time.

Literally none of that information is necessary to answer his question.

Therefore, your claim that this information is crucial isn't correct.

>Why do you need it out?
I could have a drug test coming up.

>How soon do you need it out?
Not sure.

>How much do you smoke?
I was smoking almost daily for the past two years

>How fat are you?
5'10, 201 pounds

>How much are you willing to spend?
$100

And there's that
THC is fat soluble

Wow.... you're fucked.

Just buy a niacin detox drink at a Walgreens or some shit. Start exercising, anything to get you sweating profusely. Those two combined should do the trick.

Im much smaller, 6'1 160lbs, but was in the same boat 2 years ago. Stopped 2 weeks before a test, took some niacin and ran my ass off and came out clean.

Are you fucking retarded?

THC is stored in fat cells not blood, draining the blood wouldn't do shit.

Even 4 weeks is a very long estimate. 24 weeks is insane.

Drink a ton of water. Don't smoke. At all. Just go cold turkey (seriously, other than a few nights of irregular sleep patterns you'll have zero withdrawal).

Just get fake piss. Also you are a dumbass for no stopping smoking way before even applying for a job. At no point were you like "what if they drug test?"

I'm not applying for a new job, i'm a security guard and just found out last week that i'll be becoming a commissioned guard in the near future, which means i'll likely be tested since i'll be carrying a gun.

...

Security guard with no gun? Rent a cop but soon to be a real guard. How long is the near future?

Yes it does, depending on how often you use it and your body fat.

Lmao it’s in your body for 24 weeks. Kill yourself retard.

maybe do something with your life instead of wasting tax payer dollars you dumb nigger

How is he wasting tax payer dollars?

You know how much money is wasted when these idiots OD and waste room in the hospital??

No one OD's from weed.

Typical libtard response by an idiot who doesn’t know how the world works. Just because your mainstream media says that doesn’t mean it’s true lol

Stop smoking
Get some detox running.
Lots of water and cranberry juice
Lots of exercise, like shit tons of it. Thc is fat soluble so you have alot stored up in those munchie rolls.
I've had friends pass with niacin, gal+ h20 a day, and 2 weeks of working out -which is good anyways.

Health departments are trying to push to 'Overdose' word onto canabis.
As more than the 'intended' dose.
We all know and treat OD as a life threatening/ending thing. But they want to equate greensick to popping too many oxys.
Cause muh fake news isn't fake news.

The 24+week figure is due to THC metabolites getting stored in fat (it's oil soluble). It builds up, and when you go on a diet or even skip a meal before a drug test, it'll be detected.

This is why advertised cleanse methods sometimes fail. The trick is to do a cleansing flush with Gatorade/cranberry juice and just a little salt, eat something fat/greasy (5 pieces of KFC usually does it), and pop a b-complex multivitamin a few hours before you pee in the cup (so the urinalysis won't show your urine to be too diluted, meaning you were trying to cheat the test).

if youre really that dumb, im sorry, i dont have enough crayons to explain it to you.

The trick is how much time you have to prepare.

If you know 12-14 hours before the test, you can solve it with simple water consumption.

You just have to have clean piss (assuming piss test) at the time of the test. You can get clean piss if you drink a fuck-ton before the test. Your piss will be very diluted and you'll likely pass.

Just quit now and hope you have enough lead time.

If it's a blood or hair test, you might be fucked.

OP to pass a urine drug test just drink an absolute fuck ton of wate. the water will dilute the THC and you will test negative

>becoming a commissioned guard

OK I was a security guard and know they take the cheapest route out of everything.

The test will be close to a joke.

Just get some tea for drug tests and you'll be fine.

go look up 'the jello trick' my friend toked hours before his probation every week and passed every time

simple, dipshit

from what I heard, its present in your saliva/sweat/urine for a week at most, in your blood for around a month and in your hair for up to a year.

Each one is exceedingly more expensive to test so a drug test shouldn't require you to draw blood unless cops are involved.

>weed
>overdose
Pick one you fucking retard..

I was in rehab with a guy that failed drug tests while inside (basically jail) for 3 months straight. And he never touched the shit while we were in rehab.

Counselors said it was because he was fat

Buy fake penis from Amazon ( not kidding) and get clean urine from someone else

>dont have enough crayons to explain it
Kek'd

>and get clean urine from someone else

legit. but make sure its from someone of the same gender. they can tell

The standard testing here in my country are stated like this;

Blood up to 24 h (48 rare cases)
Urine 48 h up to like 6 weeks (in most cases)
Hair up to 6 months
Saliva up to 24 h (48 rare cases)

Yeah THC is fat soluble hence why fat guys would retain it for longer.

Its why you make edibles from cannabutter. You could probably fry your mate up and make some pretty dank brownies.

>Yeah THC is fat soluble hence why fat guys would retain it for longer.

Fuck man. Is there anything Veganism can't fix?

son
Your FUCK UP

fastest way is not to be a degenerate and put THC into your body.

gj you fucking pothead for using something that stays in your blood for a long fucking time when you're going to get tested for it and lose/not get your job.

Enjoy sucking dick at truckstop restrooms.