Feels thread. Help me feel something again, Sup Forums

Feels thread. Help me feel something again, Sup Forums.

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I wish I died in September.

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shit like this hasn't affected me since highschool and yet now I feel it again

Im fucked

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>31
holy FUCK. that actualy hit me like a train. seriously

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i had a relationship like that, and like an idiot i let her go, thinking something better would come along. 20 years later and she's still the one ive loved the most.

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here are some difficult ones

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Help me Sup Forums
What to do if she feels friendship is something she can't give up on. She has few friends and she doesn't want to lose me even though she has feelings for me that mean more than a friendship?
Has anyone ever been through something like this? What can I do to convince her?

Ever since I was little I was made to feel like a freak by my father and my classmates. My father back in his day was some sorta off Alpha. Kicking ass taking names banging loads of chicks , apparently all most got a squalor ship to play basket ball at UNM. I loved to hear the story's of him being this seemingly invincible awesome guy. But now I look back on it and realize he told me these old story's to cheer him self up. To talk about all the things I would ever become. He thought there was something wrong with me. Because I loved video games and science. But to my Dad if it wasn't out side or had to do with a car he hated it. He would say I was sick in the head for being different then him. For not likeing sports or this or that. In elementary school things were not any better. No one liked me. Not even the teachers. I was the one and only fat kid of the school. My father drove my mother off as well and leached off her to support the family while telling us she was evil. I had no friends. No sanctuary. My father still loves me I suppose. But he still thinks I need to be fixed.

From my experience friendship may be for the best user

if you're going to be her friend, then be her friend. don't be one of those "friends" who ended up that way involuntarily

holy. fuck.

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>when someone slowly starts acting differently
>slowly stops treating you well
>slowly won't let you love them anymore
>slowly stops loving you
>slowly stops messaging you
>slowly stops connecting with you

How can someone enter and basically leave so quickly

these fucking thread tear me up man. but they help a little, because i usually dont ever cry. these are my exceptions. my weak moments. thank you all.

yep. lost my shit. going to bed, fuck all you guys.

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Im not feeling anything other than being horny and angry. The rest of the day i walk around like a zombie. I can't find a job, im looking and looking and really selling myself, but no one will take me. I haven't cried in a year. When people show me affection i get angry, i think theure pitying me. When people compliment me i get confused. I want to talk, to feel again. But everytime the moment arises. Everytime someone's there for me, i shut down. Almost like its too much. Bianca is a good friend but i cant help but want love and affection from her but i know that she is attracted to me in no way whatsoever. My life is nothing. I am useless. I will work to be useful and will die before i become some fucking bum on the street. But right now, in this moment in my dark room. I like feeling this painful nothingness. Because it means im feeling something, right?
>BlackMetalFaggot

I like her as more than a friend too anons. I want to be with her, grow with her. Help each other and all that but she feels like she can't gamble this away

Just take it easy then, you'll both know it when the time is right

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Have to keep this fairly vague cuz I have some clever friends that browse here, and I don't want them knowing how I fell.

>Be in highschool
>Be terribly sick for 8 months and can't leave home.
>IThinkI'mDying.jpg
>Friends don't visit me.
>Friends don't talk to me.
>Sleep 20+ hours a day to avoid feeling like shit.
>Contemplate suicide
>Start messaging a girl I used to be acquaintances with.
>Doctor finds out whats wrong with me and I get proper treatment.
>better in 2 weeks.
>start talking to girl more often.
>Get put into continuation school since I did no work while sick.
>Principal- "user unless you take 9 classes in one semester you won't graduate with your class. I'm sorry."
>FuckYouBitch.jpg
>Start making time and seeing girl regularly while taking 9classes.
>Finally ask girl out
>Girl-"Y-YES! Omg user I've really been wanting to go out with you."
>Friends with her Friends and her sister.
>Hitting the books like a fucking champ and still seeing her 3-4 days a week.
>Unbelievably stressed, but I've literally never been happier in my life.

End of P.1

Damn.

>mfw I'm also unemployed
>mfw I also can't talk to people
>mfw I'm also alone in a dark room

Your father doesn't love you, user. To love somebody is to understand them and enjoy them for who they are.

We wouldnt have to say anything. We can just play vidya, call eachother a camping faggot and eat food.

But I'm scared she won't change her mind about me

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Here's one for you, mate. Don't give up, resist, don't give those who hate you the satisfaction of knowing they won.

I've reached the point where I see or something funny and I'll laugh, but only briefly. Then I just sit in silence and realise how lonely I really am. Just wasting away.
Not that it matters to you, though.
>pic related

If she really cares for you user she won't, and if she does she doesn't deserve your feelings

I'm terrified. I think I'm the one in the poem

This one gets me every time.

Realized I forgot to say girl is 9/10. She was a Strawberry blonde with freckles. Now back to story.

>My best friend leaves for military, and he was dating my girlfriends sister.
>Feels like I lost a brother.
>Girl and I have been dating for about a month.
>Go to watch her play her sport. (Purposely Vague)
>Her stepdad is there.
>OhShit.jpg
>I'm literally the only one at the practice besides him, so he comes and sits by me.
>SD-"So I've noticed you're the only one here. Are you waiting for someone or are you some kind of pervert?"
>"Well sir I'm here to see my girlfriend since I don't have a lot of free time I try to see her whenever I can."
>SD-"Well a young man like you shouldn't have to worry. I remember when I was in high school I would just skip class and sleep around."
>Bust out the most awkward laugh of my life.
>We continue talking before we exchange names, and joke around a lot.
>GF comes up to me after practice.
>GF-"Hey user I see you've met my SD!"
>"Haha, yeah he seems cool."
>SD looks confused. Looks to me then to her, then back to me.
>Lightbulb.jpg
>SD-"OH YOU'RE user!?"
>Confirm his suspicion.
>We both have a laugh, but there is definitely and awkward feeling in the air.
>He asked about why I was sick and how I got over it.
>Explain to him I couldn't take medicine to alleviate the symptoms.
>He smiles and slaps my back
>SD-"It's okay if you do user, I can't get through a week without medicine of my own."
>Get really nervous at this hint towards drug use, but try to pass it off.
>GF is happy I finally met her SD and I didn't blow it.
>Everything is coming up Milhouse.

End of P.2

Thanks user. This is scary business

that's the piazza navona in rome its awesome

You are welcome, hope it turns out well

>Have to start studying more.
>Start going to her house more often, but it feels weird cuz I never see her sister anymore.
>Find out sister is actively avoiding me.
>UhSure.jpg
>Stop seeing her as much because we are both busy.
>Get all my work to get back into normal school done with a week to spare.
>Ask her if we can hang out because I'm excited and want to talk.
>GF-"Uh sorry user I can't I've got some family stuff to deal with, and practice."
>It feels bad, but I understand.
>See friends and run into her sister.
>Get to talking with her, and joking around.
>Her sister starts making sex jokes and stuff around me.
>I try to pass it off by saying, "It's funny cuz it would be hard to get laid, because I don't have a place to do it besides my truck."
>Explain how small a single cab truck is.
>GF Sister proceeds to describe all the different ways to have sex in the truck with me becoming progressively more uncomfortable.
>Ask her stop repeatedly.
>GF Sis-"What's wrong user it's just sex!"
>"I'm dating your sister. Due to process of elimination who do you think I'm most likely to sleep with?"
>Her laughter stops abruptly.
>everything becomes really awkward.
>Go home
>Get a text from GF
>"Hey user. I'm actually free tomorrow after all. Can we hangout at the school before getting a ride home with my sis?"

End of P.3

Hey anons. I am actually so relieved I found this thread. My girlfriend and I are on the verge of breaking up. We got into a nasty argument today, then at the end of it she was just sounding sort of numb. I asked if i could see her tomorrow, but she said after her therapy, and im so fucking scared shes going to decide in therapy if she wants to stay or leave me. I dont know why, but i feel so much love to this woman. And another aspect thats killing me is that she has a private instagram account, which she blocked me on earlier today. I know the log-in info, but I dont know what to fucking do. I dont know what I would be without her, I love her so much.

>stole her drum
wow youre some kinda evil, user

every minute that passes, the feeling of throwing up and crying get more intense, and everything just hurts

Gotta warn the eager crowds away user

Calm down user. Take a deep breath. Take as many deep breaths as it takes to calm yourself down.
Now, you love this woman. The emotion is clouding your judgement. While you love this woman, your entire life should not revolve around her and her alone.
Sure, if she decides to leave you, will it hurt?
Goddamn right it will. You sound like a man with a deep sense of loving. But the truth is, love can be found just as easily as it's lost.
If she loves you, she will want to be with you. You don't want to be around a woman who doesn't love you. So, if she breaks up, it's for the best. And if she doesn't, then that's evidence that she loves you and you should be with her.
Arguments, fights happen. It matters if you choose to stay upset together or stay upset without each other.
I hope you get happier by the end of this user

>Meet up with her the next day
>Tell her I've got big news
>Tell her I'll be graduating with her and all my friends.
>She just smiles a sad smile.
>ask her whats wrong.
>GF- "user, I think we should break up."
>Wat.jpg
>GF-"I can explain why if you want to know."
>Tell her no.
>Explain that I felt like I did everything I could to be a good boyfriend.
>Explain that I don't think I could have tried any harder.
>She nods.
>"I'm sad this is how you feel, but can I ask for one more thing?"
>Ex-"Anything user."
>"Can I have one more hug?"
Ik this was beta af, but I didn't know what to do.
>Still ride to drop her off with her sister.
>Sister invites me to go hangout.
>Explain what happened and why I didn't stay.
>Sister says if I need anything I can ask.
>Sit at party surrounded by friends for 25 minutes with a blank stare.
>Decide to just walk home.
>Get home go in room and just cry for 4 days.
>See a lot of friends during this time, but I'm still really broken up.
>Try to get better for a month, but just lie to myself that I'm better.
>Get a text.
>It's from ex.
>"Ex-"user, I'm having a birthday party in about a week and it would mean a ton to me if you would come by."


End of P.4

Why didn't you hear the explanation user?

Thank you user. The reason im so terrified is because she is my first real true love. And the thought of losing that and never being able to find it again....

Trust me user, from an user who was in a similar position. Met incredible girl. Instantly each others closest friend. Her depressed. She says similar to what you said. I push and take her on a date anyway. Most amazing night, both of us know we need to be more than friends. We date, her still depressed unstable. Not long after her only other friend kills herself.
my girls world pulled away. She pushes me away. Young me unable to - continued >

>Goto party cuz I'm lonely.
>See her in swimsuit very happy to see me.
>Joke around with her and some common friends for a while.
>Go swimming.
>See her parents again and hear how much they miss me and how mad they are at their daughter for dumping me.
>"Uh thanks nice to see you guys too."
>Stay at party until 3am.
>We tried watching a movie, but mostly everyone fell asleep.
>Ex sits on sofa with me
>She brought strawberries and we just ate and talked.
>Pretended everything was fine while trying so hard not to break down.
>Feel like we are having a romantic moment, but don't wanna say anything and ruin it.
>Talk until 6am.
>Feeling in air that we miss each other, but idk what to do about it.
>We both decided to goto bed.
>Say goodnight and she asks for a hug.
>FeelsGoodMan.jpg
>Almost say how much I miss her, but when I take a deep breathe to speak she interrupts me.
>Ex-"user please don't. I just... Please don't say anything about this. I really want to have you in my life, so we can't I'm sorry."
>Goto bed downstairs feeling like shit.

I was being prideful and felt that it would have made me insecure about future relationships. This tore me up for a year tbh, but I was too stubborn to admit it.

End of P.5

Young me unable to understand why I cant be there for her. I push hard. She breaks up with me. Im crushed. I block her on everything. I dont understand. I lock my self away. She had no one. hear in news she killed her selff. Unblock her on everything. So many messages from her. She wasnt ready for realtion ship. I pushed her into it. She was emotionally not ready. I should have waited. Let her choose when. Be patient

>Forced to be partners with here in Economics Senior year for the entire year.
>Go to tons of parties she invites me to hoping she will change her mind.
>Spend senior year feeling unbelievably lonely.
>After half the year I'd decided I'd had enough.
>Start talking to one of her friends I saw at most of her parties.
>Gonna call her Chris to avoid confusion.
>Chris and I had really hit it off.
>Starting to actually get over Ex.
>Chris is 5'2", 102lbs and a solid 7/10.
>At one of the last parties my Ex heald I really realized I liked Chris.
>The entire party stayed up all night playing games dancing and burning things like responsible young adults.
>Ask if anyone wants to watch the sunrise with me. (We were out in the country, and the sun had to rise over the mountains 10/10 recommend)
>Chris and Ex volunteer to come out.
>On the way out Ex is grabbed by her best friend who said she needed her help with something.
>So I sit down for 30+ minutes just talking to Chris waiting for the sunrise.
>She gets cold so I give her my jacket
>Chris is shy, but I'm able to get her to talk.
>We have a lot in common.
>Decide "Fuck it" and ask her out thinking that I needed to start dating again even if its just a fling.
End of P.6

I have been there user.
Your first one always hurts. You're irrational, unreasonable and you inexperienced. You give it too much sometimes and too little the other times.
But it's the first time you've felt something real for another person. Something that people base their whole lives around. Something that adds meaning to your own life.
But the beauty of it all is that you are capable of falling in love again. You are capable of being whole again. The only factor required is time.
And you never forget your first. And in a way, that's good because it becomes something you compare your future love with.
You are capable of so much more love than you know user. You'll find out soon. Good luck user. I wish you nothing but happiness

Thanks user. I'm sorry you had to go through that
I hope you're doing better now

I hate this time of year hate hate hate it too much joy and fake smiles. What i hate most is family or just grandma. bible thumping grandma basically she pulls shit like i know you only play video games because your in a wheelchair user i prayed for you last night so god will heal you and you can walk. the one thing THE ONE THING that i cant stand every year she sets in stone were haveing xmas at her house. Every fucking time is so dissapointed that i did not show up and how i must hate her she has 4 steep steps into her house i cant go up them. So this year start telling everyone that ill host xmas start saying this in july say it alot. BUT nope its the THING to goto her house and once more she will be soooo sad im not there and then ill get a phone call a few days later saying i prayed for you why don't you come to my church you know because you don't god has yet to heal you. sorry if this is just bitching just fucking hate this time of year and the fact grandma makes me want to be a hero more and more

Got me on the hook user

fyi i may be a bit high right now

Sorry this is so long guys I just need this off my chest.

>Chris and I have been dating for almost two years now.
>We lost our virginity to each other.
>Strong emotions towards her.
>Find out Ex didn't dumb me cuz she hated me.
>Find out Ex's sister was sleeping around and cheating on my friend in the military.
>Find out I almost caught her a couple times.
>Find out she gave my Ex an ultimatum. Dump him or I will literally never talk to you again.
>Ex spent a week trying to decide.
>Ex's sister started making her life a living hell
>Ex only dumped me cause she was forced to.
>Went to party with Ex and Chris only 1 time after Chris and I started dating and it took an entire year for that to happen.
>While I'm in bathroom Ex tells Chris she still has feelings for me in a drunken stupor,
>Chris gets really embarrassed and doesn't know what to say.
>Ex-"Hold onto user. He is a good guy. Don't let him get away like I did. I've cried over him for a year, and I still miss him. You have no idea how much you'll miss him when he's gone too."
>Realize all those times I've wanted to be with her she has too.
>Realize our lives of sexual and emotional tension have been mirrored all this time.
>Realize after me she started dating assholes in an attempt to fill a void.
I heard she lost her virginity to a fukboi. I've never been so jealous in my life. He came and went, and just left her a mess. I think I've made a mistake guys...

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Oh i forgot to mention.
She has been avoiding Chris and I so she doesn't interfere with us. I miss her a lot, and I can't tell if I long for her romantically or just miss her in my life in general.

sounds like you miss her in both ways

Have you ever tried to get her back into your life? I mean hell clearly both of you had feelings for each other and got put in shitty circumstances. But hell why not try

You just described how Schizoid Personality Disorder feels like, I was diagnosed three days ago.

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I've considered it, but I've been in a relationship with Chris for almost 2 years now. It hasn't been perfect, but she does keep me happy. Plus I lost my virginity to her, and its really been taking a tole on me. Like I don't want to throw away a healthy relationship for one I don't even know will work. She is also busy with college as well as me now. I don't know if we could find the time, and I'm just scared.

I also found out she tried to ask a guy out the other day whom she had a crush on all semester just have him giggle and say he is gay. :(

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Well yeah but you could just have her in your life as just friends as opposed to you breaking up with Chris? Which would fill a void of her not ever being in your life again.

I got something
Imma try to greentext but I'll see how it goes
>Be me senior year of high school
>Been focused on attending military college
> Been single for some time but me and this girl who's a junior at the time start to get closer to each other
> Found out she likes me but don't want to fall in love cuz I know I will be leaving soon
> My stupid ass falls for it and so me and her get together
>December comes and found out I was admitted to Senior Military College
> Still stay with her
> The months go by and it's time to leave for college
> We spend time together and have sex
> Talk about probably breaking up but decide to talk about it once I return for thanksgiving break
>Finally I leave to college
> Time goes by and relationship gets tough
>We fight sometimes and talk about possibly breaking up
> We decide to leave that discussion for when I return
> I am sure we will break up and go different ways and so I start catching feelings for some other girl
>Thanksgiving break is closer and we'll soon break up
> The time arrives but there's something I wasn't expecting. She told me that she's pregnant and the baby it's mine
> I am shocked by the news since she lied to me that she was on birth control the entire time we were together
> Now we are arguing about what to do
I feel like shit now. I don't want to leave her because of the baby but me liking some other girl makes me feel worse. I know we won't be happy like this but she insists we stay together. I hate myself everyday for this

That's true. I'll try hitting her up and seeing if she wants to party or hang out, I'll have to run it by Chris though cuz she has been feeling like Ex alienated her. When Ex left us alone she kinda took all of Chris' friends with her unintentionally, and that left a bitter taste in Chris' mouth.

Well damn. But yeah I mean hell do whatever you feel is right. Take care and good luck user

Thanks for letting me vent my frustrations user.
Have a great night and sleep well Sup Forumsro.

Thanks for the greentext and have a good night. my ass has a final in 7 hours