You're at a club and this guy slaps your girlfriends ass

You're at a club and this guy slaps your girlfriends ass.

What do you do?

Call NASA

ask him why he looks like the turd my impacted colon unleashed upon my anus

We are his bitches now

call Animal Control

> On Sup Forums and says that lurkers here have a gf

What?

She has probably been blown through the wall and killed so i'd leave it be.

Never happen, motherfucker is so muscle bound he couldn't lift his arm up

Have a civilized conversation with him about why he shouldn't slap the opposite genders behind, and that he shouldn't assume someone is the opposite gender, and ask him if he thought it was a woman, and then tell my girlfriend to pull out her cock and deepthroat him.

i don't think he'd be able to swing his arm fast enough to hit me.
>all strength
>no speed or mobility

Attend her funeral

slap his ass and bolt

Probably go for the legs, maybe slice some ligaments in his legs, immobilize him for my bidding, then probably take out the target before showing dominance over him, proving him to be inferior to be.

Then probably get sent to prison and get shanked in the gut while taking a shower, bleed to death, freeing my soul from this earth.

Shoot em. He's muscly, not invulnerable.

Stick a pin in him and watch him fly around the room.

helicopter dick blocks ur bullets. wat do?

Stick a "Kick Me" sticky note to his back, he'll have no way of getting rid of it.

Stand behind him, could never reach me.

Stick a "Slap my ass" sticky note instead
????
Profit

Beat him with my superior int and dex.

>Ask to solve for x, if 2/(2+(1/x)) = 2
>Get him confused
>???
>Profit

I'd throw down a freezing trap and then aimed shot + arcane shot should bring him down.

attempt to punch him in the face. seriously. i know i'll most likely get destroyed, but in the off-chance i knock him out, i look like a freaking king in my gf's eyes.

Compliment him on his One-Punch Man Cosplay

...

stab him with a needle and watch him deflate.

Ask how many genders he can life

Wouldn't that be a High 5?

TFW you will never be a freaking king

...

make the guy literally eat lead or some kind of poison that will kill him

Show him my shirt is made of cotton.

I'd call every juggalo in the state and we'd give him an old school beat down. I'm talking wicked clowns who would do anything for family. We don't allow our women to be assaulted.

...

the most faggy answer in the thread

Shoot him.

POP HIM, and watch him take off

Stand my ground and cap this meathead with my degle.

Take a needle, puncture one of the balloons and watch him go airborne

snap his neck OP. big nig doesn't know how to fight

A tiny .22 trumps a giant muscle-bound freak.

attend her funeral

Lurk him and ambush him in the dark with a tazer. Bring him home and rape his ass for days until he starve to death. Drag his dead ass out to my farm and let my crazy donkey fuck his dead ass until its turned to a pile of rotting mud. Collect some of it in a jar and masturbate on his remains for years to come.

Pull out my gun and shoot him.

Yall don't even know. Google is your friend.

dare him to try to wipe his own ass after taking a shit

That shit just gave me brain AIDs. Most juggalos most mobile possession is thier home on wheels

offer him my coat, it's a cold night out

Say that she's taken, brush it off and ask if she's alright

Because I'm not looking for a criminal record

Poke him with a needle and watch him fly around the room like a witch.

...

put a sticker on his back and watch him struggle to remove

Pussy

You do not need to be ripped to pull a trigger