Best injury for scoring pain killers?

Best injury for scoring pain killers?

I'm covered by my parents insurances which would make pills free, completely theoretically, If I wanted to hurt myself what's the most strategic way to do it?? not a cry for help.

Try getting beat up

Breaka finger

Smash hand with hammer. Has to be a break. Go near radiation until u get cancer

Seems where I am I get the slightest cough and they give me a bottle or two of lean

T3s blow
How to get laughed out a doctors office 101

Replace mattress with stones, get black out drunk for a week or two.
Get your doc to book a back ex Ray
>.... His backs totally fucked..... Write up script.
Enjoy your drugs?

>not a cry for help.
Says the 'man' willing to injure himself to get free painkillers off of his parents health insurance. The jokes write themselves. If you're not a troll you need mental help before you literally hurt yourself. Got dayim, son.

Kidney stones guarantees you Percocet. But with the opioid epidemic, it's going to be very hard to get good pain killers without proof.

Get your wisdom teeth removed.

play in traffic

Heroin is cheaper

And easier to get

>
New DEA licensing requirements and crackdowns means any physician who doesn't want to lose their license will probably only give you tylenol #3 or #4 (tylenol + codeine)...

Why dont you just kys? faster that way

>I want to willingly get addicted to opiates
Are you fucking retarded?

Might as well start sucking dick to get them, because that's what you'll end up doing, anyway.

This actually works every time:
- Hide a safety pin or needle in your pocket.
- Go to ER or clinic saying that you have had increasingly intense dull pain radiating from your low back (kidney area) around to the side & front for the past few days.
- Say that it has been increasingly difficult to pee over that same time period & that your pee has looked weird.
- When the examining doctor pushes on your lower abdomen (they will) wince & jump like it is causing sharp pain.
- They will now ask you do go into the bathroom to pee in a cup for a urine test.
- When you pee, prick your finger slightly in a hidden place & squeeze a few drops of blood into the cup.
- Mix it in.
- They will do a quick lab test while you wait & you will be diagnosed with bladder/kidney stones.
- Standard procedure is to send you home with a few paper filters for you to pee through for the next few days along )to try & get a stone sample) along with instructions to see a specialist (urologist) if it doesn't get better.
- Since it is widely recognized that bladder/kidney stones are extremely painful they will also automatically give you about a week supply of Oxicontin, or something similar.

Ya, I'm retarded, that's why I didn't keep my though to myself so I could see how it looked from a different perspective, I said in OP that it's theoretical, it's something I'm thinking about but I'm keeping options open.
how about you take your own advice.
I wouldn't know where to get it and it seems more dangerous.
that'd be cool, where do you live?
I'd have to make it believable somehow, like to start working out and mess up something with that.

dude, this sounds legit. thank you

Also, don't forget to have a distressed/miserable look on your face the whole time that you are at the clinic even in the waiting room.
They actually look for this to decide if you are legit.