What was the worst sex of your life? what happened? what was she like?

what was the worst sex of your life? what happened? what was she like?

>be me 10 year old
>over at cousins house, same age
>steals something i brought and tells me to undress and she will give it back
>notevenhard.jpeg
>she gets on top of me and just grinds on me with no clothes on

was the closest ive ever gotten to sex, 23 year old now

... Fuck. Hard to narrow it down.
I have a handful of bad experiences.
Could you be more specific?

Got a damaged girl when I was sixteen she was eighteen just laid there looking at The Wall no sounds no movement I was like are you not enjoying this she said no I am I came three times eventually I found out her dad has raped her since sixteen so it was ocwoard as fuck..

A girl I convinced to have sex with me in one if the big locker rooms of the public pool was a lot less attractive with her clothes off. So it was kind if mediocre floppyness

Since 16? Weird of him waiting 16 years to rape her, just doesnt make sense.

eating out a fat girl

i really mean the worst. the one that wasn't enjoyable at all

>>be me, drunk
she, astronomicly fat.
Horny af
Felt like fucking a giant squid.

Doesn´t matter, had snu snu.

Client and I got fucked up on booze, weed, coke, and Xanax. Tried to fuck a hooker and couldn’t get it hard. She tried sucking my flacid dick for 30 minutes. Got hard enough at one point, but when she climbed on top, it died. At least she wasn’t a real person. She was a hooker. Essentially a household appliance for rent.

could you tell us what happened in more detail?

Well.. There was a first and last date that ended up in a parking lot.
We were making out, and I was feeling her through her leggings.
She started blowing me, and once I was just avout ready to cum I went to return the favor and eat her out.
The moment I pulled her leggings and thong off I was shotgunned in the nostrils by the foulest stank I've ever encountered.
I put on my poker face and saddled up.
After making an excuse that the car was too stuffy I rolled all the windows down.
She was so fucking loose though.
I literally couldn't believe it.
It took all of my imagination and determination to cum and even then it was more for my reputation than it was for her attractiveness.
She was so cute.. But that vagoo was a toxic cavern.

I was seeing this girl for a little while who was pretty cute in her own weird way. Not the best looking girl, and I had definitely been with much hotter girls before and after. But she had something about her that I liked. Anyway, the third time we hung out she decided to suck my dick. It was the most boring, unskilled, and dispassionate blowjob I've ever gotten. In, out, in, out, she could only take the head in her mouth, there was no suction, it seemed really dry; you know that saying "bad pizza is better than no pizza"? Well I would rather have had no pizza that day. Gave her pointers which she ignored, gave her encouragement which she ignored (Oh, that feels great! Keep doing tha....oh you're doing something else now that doesn't feel good". So after a few minutes of the worst head I'd ever gotten I told her to just stop, went into the bathroom and jerked off real quick. Came back and she was crying, and she had some sob story about how she was raped by every guy she'd ever known. I didn't realize at the time, but apparently allowing her to suck my dick of her own free will with nary a prompt from me for her to do so was RAaAAAAPE and she went around telling everyone that we knew I had raped her. I mean, we didn't even get to have sex and she was telling people that I raped her. I found out shortly afterward that she's a narcissist and a control freak and her telling everyone we knew that I raped her was her pre-emptive strike against me in case I told people that she gave terrible head. Thankfully the people she told were more my friends than they were hers and no one believed her because she had the same sob story for every guy she hooked up with. And she hooked up with a LOT of guys as it turns out. Girl was a super slut. Found out that she got gangbanged by 5 guys at a party while everyone else watched and cheered them on, as well as other super slutty shit. Apparently her pussy looked like a landmine went off in her pants.

meet her again and fuck her for real

>ocwoard
Fucking what is wrong with you?

>ocwoard
i'm here for you user, its awkward

>be first
>first sexy time
>cum in 3.2 seconds
she texts me several times to hang out but i never talked to her after that. missed opportunity for a fuckbunny

did you actually eat her out? did it taste nasty or did it just smell?

ive got no drive to talk to women let alone talk to women for sex.I will just die a virgin i guess

I tried using my left hand...

I didn't.. I almost barfed being in proximity. The whole fuck I was mouth breathing to avoid taking it into my nostrils.

Was messing with this girl in my car. She wanted to suck my cock. Never sucked cock before. She was all teeth. I had to stop her. Told her to get out.

Got with a girl who number 1 was fatter than the pics she was sending on whatsapp and number 2 when she bent over her pussy stunk like steamy horse piss so I just went floppy and wanted to punch the fat cunt for not having a proper clean pussy

A girl who I use to work with, then started hooking up with. She had the weakest pussy, EVER! She couldn't take it hard, or fast, or deep. Yeah, it was pretty tight, but I had to fuck her so slow & shallow, I'd go limp before I could cum. After the third failure, I bailed. She then proceeded to talk shit about me, to out coworkers. She told them that all I did was use her... fucked her and dumped her. After a few of our coworkers confronted me about this, I filled them in on the details. Sorry, but if I'm not sexually satisfied, I'm moving on.

Worst sex of your LIFE?
You kids aren't old enough to have had a sex life, unless you're talking about the worst jerk-off session you've had, which isn't considered to be a sex life. What's the worst that can happen during masturbation, you're caught by your mom or dad, and they gave you a lecture?

Post this thread again when you're old enough to have had sex with another person.

"worst sex of your life..." LOL

I'm in my 30's and have lost count of just how many women I've fucked.
Your condescending tone tells me that you're jealous because even these stories of bad experiences are better than the zero play you've gotten.

Yeah, worst sex of someones life up until now? You want them to post the worst sex of their life, when they are in their death bed, fool?

virgin spotted

she?
>dry spell
>on grindr for lolz
>guy says he'll suck me if i fuck him
>exchange pics
>go to meetup fantasizing about it but don't intend to tell him which car I am
>spots me from pics
>gets in
>starts touching me and I start driving
>guess i'm doing this
>park. he sucks me some, and then we get out and he bends over hood.
>don't know how to get out of situation, so reluctantly stick it 'in'
>trouble staying hard
>finally in and thrusting
>he's moaning but it's not doing nuttin for me
>fake it
>he's all talking up next time in ride back.
>drop him off, drive a block, stop, get out, vomit.

>hottest girl I've ever dated
>10/10 body, super cute, thin, busty
>only wants to have sex to get pregnant, which she doesn't tell me (long story, found out later)
>she lays like a corpse during sex
>She has almost no sex drive other than desire to get a baby and doesn't moan or even change expressions
>complains the entire time because I'm bigger than average
>says it hurts if we go longer than 15 minutes and makes me stop
>refuses to do oral, handjobs, anything else.
>she used to be kind of slut, slept with 17 guys before me, and it somehow killed sex for her.

Rest of my sex life has always been fine. Hottest chick and I could barely keep it up because she was such a robot. Shame.

dunno why but this made my day

>Be me, on a first time tinder hooukp
She comes over and we started watching a movie, like 10 minutes in she starts grabbing my dick
>kinda sketched out how easy it was to get in this girls pants, so i leave to grab condom
>We start fucking (I'm on top) and after like 4 pumps she pulls me out, rips off the condom and puts me back in
>Half worried about getting the clap now but i let it happen
>After a while she begs me to hit from behind, so i flip her over and she sticks her ass up
> STANK.jpg
>bitch smells like she hasn't wiped in a month
>dont have the heart to tell her
>fake cum after 30 seconds and gtfo
>tell her to leave because i work in the morning (I don't)
>never call again

I can deal with stank pussy, but fuck man... wipe your ass. My nostrils were assaulted by poop particles in a way I've never experienced.

No stds though thank god

Why you trying so hard to sound alpha, you virgin cuck

First time I fucked my friends mom
>15
>At friends house
>We were watching nemo in her room
>her mom comes home from work
>tells my friend to help her with preparing dinner and I'm left alone watching finding Nemo
>sudden urge to look for her panties
>find her drawer full of them
>pull one out and that's when her mom comes in
>she just stared at me to a while and smiled gently
>That's when she closed the door and locked it
>she came and sat me down and said "have you ever had sex"
>not really only a few times by my sisters friends
>says she could teach me a few things for the future
>at this point my heart was racing and I was like ok let's fucking do this
>big tits, red hair, big ass and fit
>but this is where it got bad
>when she sucked my dick I came right away in her mouth and she laughed it off and said alright put it in
>pushed me to the bed and sat on top of me
>she bounced so hard I cummed again inside of her
>My dick was hurting and I didn't feel comfortable so then I changed my focus to nemo in the background the part with the dentist
>lady let out one loud af moan and i cummed again inside of her as Nemo escaped the dentist
>she quickly got off and put her clothes on and left me naked in bed watching Nemo
>i laid there thinking about what I'd just done my dick hurt and I wanted to cry
>later found the strength to put on clothes to join them for dinner
>she kept looking at me and smiling and my friend also stared at me with a weird look like she knew I'd just fucked her mom
>Finished awkward dinner and went home
>didn't fap for days but eventually came back
>started dating friend after some time but somehow kept having sex with her mom
>Ff 9 years later I married her daughter but we still have sex
>it was just the first time that I hated so much

sadly I'm virgin.
this means that my worst sex will (erm, may) happen somewhere in the future

> meet girl with friends
> hit it off and take her home
> total starfish
> ask her if she's enjoying herself
> says she only gets off to anal
> figure this is my lucky day
> spit on my cock and work it in
> she wants to be on top
> now she's slaming down in a squat position
> feelsgoodman.jpg
> she starts cumming
> I start cumming
> she lifts off upon hearing I was cumming
> her gaping anus just empties all over my legs, stomach, and groin
> it was like tapping a beer keg wrong
> just a few hard poots and a stream of chef boyardee gravy
> she freaks and runs for the bathroom
> leaving a shit trail behind her
> she was in the bathroom for an hour too embarrassed to open the door
> meanwhile I'm soaked in feces and really NEED the shower
> I ended up breaking into my own bathroom and walked right past her into the shower
> when I was finished she was long gone

Never saw her again.

First time I fucked a guy.
He sucked me off but his teeth kept touching my dick, painful. Then he wanted me to fuck him with no lube. His dick smelled so bad, I wasn't even near it and I could smell it and the whole time he's acting like he's amazing and doing me a favour.
The whole thing was so bad, couldn't even stay hard enough to get my dick in him. I just got dressed and left.
Thank fuck as well, if his dick smelled that bad there's no way he cleaned his ass.

Turned me off dudes for a while, I cancelled the other hookups I had planned. Took me over a year to realise that HE was what turned me off, not that I wasn't into dudes.
I shed a tear when I think of the cock I missed out on because of him.

>halloween party
>everyone is leaving
>just me and hostess
>tell her good night
>"wait user, you're drunk. get your ass upstairs. my room is at the end."
>diamonds.jpg
>fuck around, eat that pussy raw
>fucking dog is standing in the doorway panting
>fucking dog sits next to bed panting
>fucking dog starts sniffing me
>fucking dog's name is brutal, a pitbull
>"brutal no" "brutal go away"
>i lost all will to live
>never saw her again
she was a punk girl but well off, extremely smart with dat ass. i honestly didnt even know i had an in, i was just chilling and drinking. spent the night there and left at sunrise

Be chilling with my best friend, his gf, couple other people. Lots of booze, couple joints get passed around. Clothes come off, everyone chilling in boxer/panties, lots of friendly groping/petting going on. End of the night, me and best friends gf are the only one still awake, she sitting between me and him on couch, topless, reaches down, starts jacking us both off. Whiskey dick fully engaged, pretty much no response from me, friend mumbles incoherently, is rock hard. She climbs off couch, kneels in front of him, states straight at me, starts sucking him. About 5-6 minutes later, friend grunts, can see his balls twitching, he unloads in her mouth. She pulls back, very obviously swallows. Never breaks eye contact with me the whole time. My dick is now hard enough to hammer nails with. She looks approvingly at my hard on, smiles, stands up, motions for me to follow her. We go to basement garage, where there is a big couch. She slides her panties off, has nice little landing strip, lies back on couch. I lick her a couple minutes, the climb on top and start fucking her missionary. She moans, tells me to be rough with her. Really slamming her now, she's coming like crazy. Suddenly, my dick slips out of her pussy, slides between her ass cheeks, along couch. At this moment I remember that this old couch is the one we used to have bags of road salt and sand stacked on top of all winter. It is covered in a fine layer of grit and salt. All the skin on my dick, from head to sack, is immediately ground raw by the force of my thrust, and salty sand fills abraded wounds. I let out a high pitched, girly scream, and fall down off the couch. So much blood. She screams, runs back upstairs. I lie there a while, too agonized to move. Everyone else in the house slept through the entire thing. Buddy's gf never told him. Had to tell my fiance I passed out, dumped an ashtray on my lap, and that the wounds were from irritation. Dick healed, never got caught cheating.

...

This. I've experienced this.
It's almost like being able to touch them is such a privilege they don't figure any effort needed.

Ha ha!! Wow, thank you for that story. I nearly pissed myself at "chef boyardee gravy".

nice~! any pics?

that was fucking hilarious user

Glad you enjoyed the story.
It wasn't fun cleaning that literal shit up.

Consider yourself lucky the dog didn't think you were hurting her, or considered your slapping nutz a kong toy.

The worst sex of my life was with this older guy. He was at a bar, and he played the nice guy card waaaay too hard, but he bought me drinks all night and was good conversation. I figured "aw fuck it" and went along with it.
We got back to his place and it was awful. He thought being aggressive or dominant or taking charge was "mean," he was at least ten years older than he had told me, but most likely more. He went down on and and tried to get me going but couldn't and he kept apologizing.
So I just left. It was awful.

This isn't supposed to be a cringe thread.

>had a workplace fuck friend.
>sex in parking lot, bathroom stalls, empty office, usual.
>diamonds all the time with this chick
>went to her apartment
>sadtrombone.jpg
>could only do this shit in public.

>be me 17 yo
>obsessed with some goth girl in my school, i want her as a gf
>i was rather timid but played all my cards, she didnt gave a shit so i got friendzoned
>fastforward to the end of the year, i meet a new girl even more of a qt
>get into fight with new girl so im rather pissed
>cellphone rings
>its the goth girl, she owes me some money i gave her to grab a cab one day so she wants me to come to the house to give it back
>i know where this is going
>i honestly didnt want anything from her, never forget and honestly i never brought bitches to the house, i used to live with my mother, little sister and grandma so its a matter of respect
>whatever so i got outside and goth girl appears with her friends, she is all drunk and fucked up, they leave her with me
>she wants to go upstaris, i dont want because there is my grandma and sister enjoying a comfy night, im not going to get in my room with a bitch
>i tell her to go away, she insist
>after 20 minutes arguing in the entrance of the house i tell her "fine lets fuck"
>but on the condition we use condom
>she doesnt want, i tell her if not she gets the fuck out, she accepts
>tell her to not vomit on the house, go upstairs, grab condom come back
>honestly i would fuck her raw but i dont know where she has been or if she play me and someway she ends up knocked up
>start kissing, she tastes like vomit, whatever
>tell her to lay on the floor
>put condom
>fuck her till i couldnt any more
>take her ouside
>put her in cab
>go home
>never talked of it again, start a relationship with other girl

slapping nutz would infer i had an erection and was fucking her. my sex drive went into the negative as soon as that dog was in the doorway..
>negativeboner.jpg

Tell that to Mr. Niceguy. If he only knew I just put a post up on Whisper and went and fucked the first guy to message me.
I hope he never touches a woman. God it was creepy.

> what was the worst sex of your life ? ;

..... Land whale

> what happened ? ;

..... blubbering uncontrollably :

> what was she like ? ;

..... land whale .

You sound like my type of slut.
I'm pretty rough on Whisper hookups.

Hard to say, probably a toss-up between one of two jewish girls.
Better make that three jewish girls.

She just layed there ... just fucking layed there and done nothing

>I got together with my friends sister after years of mutual tension between us.
>One day we went to her room, making out on her bed.. getting touchy, she's this cute girl with a great body.
>Get ready for sex, it was her first time so I figured I'd be gentle and made sure she was really wet.
>Get my dick in, and it was like throwing a sausage in a hallway. My dick is actually a good size but she was so big..
>There was like no resistance at all.

What exactly did he do so wrong? He bought you drinks and cared enough about you to apologize if he wasn't doing well enough.
People like you who reject awkward guys are the reason we have mass shootings.

Wow.. You've surpassed Beta and entered Omega territory.
You've got zero concept of what actually turns a woman on in the bedroom.
They aren't vending machines that you pump friend-tokens into and expect sex from. They like to be taken, despite what the sjw crowd tells your virginal ass.

Fucking tragedy. It broke my whole perception of hotness. Never fucked a fat girl, but maybe there is something to that thing people say about them trying harder.

last time had sex 3 years ago mom hooked me up a blowjob form old junkie for 20 buck me not want waste 20 for blowjob talking into fucking her body not look nice old ans needle marks brother yell at girlfriend about halfway quit happy i quit it that was the 3rd time i got laid no fun glad i didn't bust nut i really regret that time

I'm the femanon. Its not my duty to fuck every gu y that's nice to me. Plus, it was already a pity fuck, and he managed to fuck that up.
If you're trying to fap and it's not working, do you still do it because your hand sure tried hard? No, you stupid faggot, you quit.

had to predend that I came. some random girl at a festival

You sound like a lust. A gross, gross slut.

Bet you're fat.

why do you think about women like "bad boys"? because they are dominant and aggressive. I'm sorry but it's the truth. you can still be dominant and aggressive without being an asshole though. i consider myself a nice guy but in bed? I'm dominant and aggressive as fuck

Started off alright but then I tore the ol' banjo string. Hurts like crazy but carry on and even manage to finish. Pull out and there's a bit of blood so I tell her she must be on her period. Kick her out and go for a shower then off to work I go.

>had good sex

> If you're trying to fap and it's not working, do you still do it because your hand sure tried hard?

Lol antagonizing you lonely virgins is fun as fuck.
No, definitely not. But you almost certainly are.

Some try harder.. But they're insecure.

>g
>o
>o
>d
>f
>o
>r
>y
>o
>u

What

don't listen to those retards. you shouldn't pity fuck guys though. it'll be better to just straight up reject them.

>posting a pic without timestamp

Suuure landwhale, sure.

She didn't let me eat her out, not even touch her nipples, I don't know if she was afraid of something or just shy, didn't even suck me. The only memorable thing I remember are her dark long hair covering her tits while riding me. But overall it wasn't great, I prefer a bit more of action.

Hooked up with a rando off Tinder and she was like a 3/10. Put a condom on and fucked her, came, realized condom came off inside her somewhere. Said she wouldn't get an abortion. I panicked for a short while after that, but never spoke to her again and never heard from her again.

>dry period with my wife
>she finally decides it's time for sex
>lots of foreplay
>go down on her and get her off twice
>my turn
>start fucking her
>a minute into fucking she starts laughing
>like hysterical laughing
>I think to myself "I've waited months for this shit?"
>roll off her, get dressed and go out for a beer
>after that I just fucked fuckbuddies

First time. We were both virgins. She was curvy, nice tits, lovely girl, into me (for some unexplained reason).

had already fingered her to orgasms (she was one of those girls that virtually passes out). We decided that we need to fuck. Tried car, but too small/awkward and she was as tight as fuck (i'm a little on the girthy side, but I did not know that back then), and not super-wet even after orgasm so I didn't get in. We thought we'd go innawoods with a blanket and lube.

We walk, spread blanket, get down to it, condom on, lube her up, lie on her, slip it in, start to move, couple of thrusts, starting to feel good when she freezes and says "user! I hear someone coming" (it sure as hell wasn't me). Shwe pushes me off and grabs clothes; I get an instant soft-on and a deer wanders into the clearing, sees us and runs off. Mood is spoiled - we dress, pick up blanket and trudge back to the car.

Never got the chance to fuck her again.

>Bad pizza is better than no pizza. I would have rather had no pizza that day

Idk why man but that made me laugh like a madman

what happened with your wife after? she wasn't bothered that you weren't fucking her? why did she laugh anyway?

>fucked drunk married sister of my gf in the ass in their kitchen
>pull out, dick is covered in shit (thank god i wore condom)
>she shit all over the kitchen floor

>another bitch i was about to fuck i could not get hard at all cause i didn't find her attractive at the time
>thought i would lick her pussy at least and maybe i get hard in the process since i normally do
>pulled her panties down...pubic area crystal clean from hair
>her pussy, perineum and asshole where like a fucking jungle and was smelling piss too
>pulled my pants back up and left


>fat girl i knew started hitting on me
>heard from fucking everyone that fat girls give amazing blowjobs
>said what the heck lets investigate
>9/10 blowjob
>she said she wants me to fuck her doggy
>turns around to get fucked and all this fat and pimples on her ass just made my dick go flaccid in 1 second
>told her to leave cause i'm not feeling well


>pretty girl i used to know from high school came back in town and contacted me to go out for a coffee
>pregnant
>not pretty pregnant
>huge milky boobs though
>in the car back home i told her i want to touch her tits to see how it feels
>she let me touch them
>NOICE.gif
>dick hard so i get her hand on it
>starts grabbing it like it was her fucking life support
>girl was thirsty as fuck apparently
>suddenly she farts
>HOLY FUCKING SHIT I'M NOT READY TO DIE
>told her to leave me at my house....
>to clarify things....i would be ok if it was just a normal fart even if it was a little smelly, i'm not a fucking sicko...but this thing was like the city sewers broke loose...


>Girl i went out with for sometime was drunk in the passenger seat
>threw up all over the car...stopped the car to clean it up cause the smell was making me want to puke as well

that's the most memorable things

Did you just have a stroke or are you retarded? Wtf did I just read?

This

I don't know why she laughed. We hadn't been getting along so it didn't bother her at all that I just got up and left.

We're still together. I don't bother her for sex, she doesn't have to say "no" to me all the time so it's all good.

Does she know/care that you're fucking other people?

>People like you who reject awkward guys are the reason we have mass shootings.
I'm really glad I read that while on the toilet because I laughed so hard I literally shat

I like to retell this one just because it showed what an idiot I was back then

>going to go to high school dance with friends
>one of the girls brings along her friend, Alice
>alice is curvy with nice big tits
>get to the dance and find out tickets had to be purchased in advance
>Alice and I don't have tickets so we decide to walk home
>when we get to the end of her street she points to a path leading into the woods and says "that's where kids go to make out. want to go in?"
>say yes and we walk down the path a ways
>sit on some concrete blocks
>she leans over and starts kissing me
>first time for me
>making out and I accidentally brush her boob
>being the fedora-wearing guy I was back then I apologize
>she tells me it felt good, takes my hand and puts it on her boob
>more making out, more feeling her boob
>she takes my hand and slips it under her sweater
>her satin-clad boob feel warm and soft in my hand
>really making out now and feeling her up
>she stops, looks me in the eye and says "do you want to go further?"
>I sya yes, stand up and start walking further down the path
>Alice looks at me like I'm retarded because, I guess, I'm retarded
>she says "maybe I should just go home"
>walk her to her house, she says good night and closes the door

worst sex I didn't have

>2nd time having sex
>girl is a friend of a friend
>get to her apartment, it's the lower level of her parents house
>fool around a bit
>she points me to a box of condoms on the table
>I grab the box, open it up
>there are a bunch of used ones
>wtf
>tell her I'm not touching that
>she doesn't mind bareback
>Stick penis inside
>1 pump, cum
>look her in the eyes
>looneytunesthatsallfolks.jpg

>be quadrillion years old.
>ok, more like mid 20s maybe.
>girl, huge boobs, at least those were nice
>actual sex was terribad, couldn't feel a thing in there, and she'd spasm at every touch or thrust, continuously tilting her pelvis at every move.
Turns out sex is hard to enjoy if during sex you're literally generating thoughts like "Should I be calling a priest right now?" and "You could fit an airplane in there, and possibly a maintenance crew for it as well"

I think she does. But I bring home my paycheck every week, keep a roof over our heads, food on the table and she drives a fairly new car. I think she's made peace with the fact that things would change drastically (as in I'd leave) if she made a big deal of my getting my needs taken care of when she won't.

How do I change file size? I'm bored of cleaning house and took a pic with timestamp because fuck it. But its too big?

>tinder

>kinda sketched out how easy it was to get in this girls pants

You dumb or something?

>be fag
>hook up with another fag
>good looking, hairy, nice body
>getting hot and heavy
>go to finger his ass before fucking him
>dingleberries
>yes, dingleberries stuck in his asshair
>fuck, dude, did you even shower before I came over?
>let him blow me, tell him to jerk off while he does and then call it a night

>be 19. her 18
>in a mustang making out
>playing with her tits and putting my hand in her pants
>she starts to pull her hair up in a pony tail
>gonnagetheadforthefirsttime.jpeg
>starts sucking me off
>why can't I feel anything?
>She's going to town jerking me off and sucking my dick. I push her head down further onto my cock.
>still nothing
>i can tell that this should be hot but my dick aint having it
>she gets frustrated that i didn't cum after about 20 minutes of fooling around and sucking me dick.
>We'll bang, okay?
>she gets into the back seat and gets fully undressed and spreads her legs
>holy fucking...
>think to myself, this will have to make me cum.
>i ride her in the back seat and still can't shoot it off.
>she gets up and leans over the front seat, ass in the air
>sits down on my dick and jumps up and down cowgirl style
>grabbing her ass and playing with her tits in front of me
> still nothing.
>mfw my first time getting head or having sex and I was effectively cock blocked by my own dick.
>guess I either desensitized myself through years of watching porn or it just hadn't hit me what was happening. :/

I hope you didn't do something like this a second time

Fucking kek!

Probably best you don't breed user

>be me 23 in college
>would go to bars and pick up girls from my college
>recently moved in with friend from HS so his friends are usually with us at the bar
>girl named Nicole (his friends sister) and I become kind of close
>we play wing man for each other
>she's really good at it, gets me a few take home fucks a month and genuinely seems excited or turned on by it
>she's very plain, brunette, with a thin but pretty good looking body
>she's also very crass and blunt, and turns off a lot of interested guys with her mouth
>one night she calls and says she's at the bar and needs a ride home
>she helps me out enough I oblige
>pick her up and start driving home
>she says she was out alone because her brother (who she lived with) had his douche friends over
>tell her she can hang out and have a drink at my place for a bit since we live close
>get smashed together
>she ends up getting into bed with me
>not that weird, we're pretty good friends and haven't done anything up to that point
>starts apologizing for not getting me any pussy that night
>NBD, just kind of want to sleep
>"I guess you didn't help get me any dick for tonight either"
>kind of ignore her
>she undresses in a hurry, and spoons up behind me and slides her hand down my pants and starts jacking me
>pretty hot so I'm diamonds
>roll over and foreplay for a bit
>feel her tits, one is a big C or small D
>the other is a B at best
>WTF
>move past it, start to try to fuck her
>shes dryer than a popcorn fart
>still wants me to fuck her "use some spit"
>dehydrated as fuck from drinking, can barely spit
>finally get enough lube to feel ok, she's kinda loose and too shallow to take more than about 4" of me
>totaldeadfish.zip
>no noise, no emotion, no movement
>no way I can come
>give up, roll off of her
>she's pissed, apparently she was enjoying it more than she was letting on
>rolls over and goes to sleep
>wake up and try it again
>same shit, but now I can see her mismatched tits
>bonerkill. Worst sex ever

>Have neighbor friend
>We're 14, his sister is in fifth grade (like 12ish?)
>Dresses horrifically slutty and has a rep as a whore in our neighborhood
>At neighbor's house for party, we thought it was really hardcore because we got into his bud light
>his sister is in her room on myspace because mad at neighborfriend
>Go hang out with her, talk shit about her brother with her
>End up making out, she has no idea what she's doing, also braces causing issues
>Pull her hollywood undead tank top up over her misquito bite tits (no bra necessary) and start kissing down her stomach
>she slides off her shorts and panties, but she's in a computer chair so it's like rolling around some, very uncomfortable to try and eat her out
>Finally she suggests we move to the bed, and I eat her out there
>Get the head of my dick inside after a bit more kissing, and she's like "wait i've never done this before"
>mfw neighborhood whore was a virgin who had only kissed like 3 dudes and given a handjob once
>Didn't want head because kissing was bad enough with the braces, settled for a handjob
>Made me swear not to tell her bro
>Moved away like 3 months later when her parents split up

Pure gold m8

"Dryer than a popcorn fart"
Help xD