Ask an ER doc anything, no really

Ask an ER doc anything, no really

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have you ever been caught with a boner while examining really sexy children?

how many dead bodies have you fucked?

Has anyone ever tried to seduce you on the job? Bonus if it was for drugs.

Most memorable case?

Got a scribe making your notes?

what drugs cause the most ER visits ?

Is it worth your 20's?
and sanity?

What's the weirdest thing you've ever had to surgically remove from an asshole?

boner during job? yes, you're still young in residency and get boners pretty easily and there was this one chick I rounded on during residency. her nip popped out of her gown. instant boner. im pretty sure she caught me looking. same last year, huge hooter chick lied down and saw her nip pop out. fuckin hot. we are still human. didn't affect their treatment though

Wants the weirdest thing you taken out of/put into someone.

my ex was an ER doc, she tolad me that one guy started getting an erection while she was catheterizing him

amazing how much weed causes panic attacks. the weed of modern times is different from my days of partying (meaning 97-99 weed) now weed can be kinda fucked up. cyclic vomiting, edibles causing panic attacks, not as mellow as b4

Is your name lakwhinder sinha Patel Singh

ya i lost my 20s in their entirety. residency fucking sucked. there were a few rotations I would literally feel dread and anxiety going into. the night shifts fuck you up also cuz you are on the spot and up all night... i mean i make da money now and am able to do what i want or buy what i want for my kids...i dont know if worth it....the stress did likely cause an anxiety disorder that i medicate now with an SSRI which works great lol

ever caught head lice from homeless people?

bingo, this is lak singh, you are amazing at guessing my name, here is my latest dic pick

Am a canadafag so might be different for you, but why the fuck is it so slow treating patients. I went to the emerge here and there was 6 people there and it took 4 hours for 1 doctor to see all the patients and none of them was particularly fucked up.

my work buddy caught scabies from a patient, supposedly...he also frequented massage parlors, so maybe he just rubbed on the wrong ho

that's weird. i work for kaiser in norcal, we don't do that

What would you say the greatest success story you've experienced is? Someone you really thought wasn't going to make it, but you and your department pulled them through anyway?

one guy keeps coming in and we catch him spankin it under his blanket. ya nurses have a tough job, i just leave, they have to interact more with people

i had a fat coworker who was pretty lame at her job. i was a young pup out of residency and new ay my gig. i saw a 25 year old guy with worsening wheezing, fat doc had this guy. he was going down. i saw her fuck up and need my help on an earlier case that week. i lied and told her I was "all caught up" and would help sedate the guy and get him on a ventilator. this is called intubation. its hard with asthma patients, i basically lied and then made my shift harder to prevent this numbskull from hurting this young guy. saved the guy, he was out and home in a week.

ever fingered a patient who didnt need to be fingered?

nope, i'm a skeevy perv but yet, nope

...

Yeah I don't know what the deal in Canada is but healthcare here is third world for wait times, heard numerous stories of people waiting so long for treatment people have died, people sometimes wait over a year before being able to be treated for cancer. If you need some kind of surgery for your knee or ligament the wait times are absurd.

I guess I can just chalk that up to shitty government making healthcare worse.

bugs out of ears happens sometimes, i actually pulled a tube of lube out of an ass, irony at its most anal

what's the max amount of narcotic you'll write for a junkie?

Man I wish, I am in a moderate sized city and everyone in the room looked normal with nothing serious at all.. in fact I talked to most and they couldn't of been to bad.

This was at like 4am, I usually go super late if I really need to go to avoid all day waits. No emergencies came through the door and the nursing staff literally just talked with each other the entire time because there was nothing to do.

no good solution to healthcare problems, greed makes all worlds move and less you have greed less you have progress

if i sniff out they are a junkie, zero, unless they have a good story,

I'm trying to study to get myself together but I can't make myself pay attention for more than a minute before my mind races. Any tips on how to get meds? I'm worried that if I ask they'll just not only deny me but write on DSB on my record and I'll be fucked for life.

Oh, nice. As an asthmatic myself, I can relate. Since you had to tube him, I'm guessing a nebulizer was tried but didn't take? Also, what was the screw-up you mentioned?

if you are critical then you get a lot of attention, other than that everyone is seen as kind of lame, you're at the mercy of the system then

Neurology resident here. Why do you consult us so goddamn much?

you need to see a doc and get on something if that's true, nobody abuses to slow their mind down to working levels

nebs, steroids IV, magnesium IV, bipap

What does Necrotising Fascsitis smell like?

My friend named our league team "Necrotising Fascsitis" and our doc friend sperged out and made us change it.

His reason was it smelt so unpleasant that he didn't want to be reminded of it.

We named it Necrotising Diverticulitis instead.

Ever peeped at a chicks ass/pussy that wasnt necessary?

Dont lie to Sup Forums doc!

Did you experience depression from studying? I hardly have time for anything (I'm on break/vacation now). But when the semester starts, I'm fine for the first 4 months and then it's downhill from there. I'm ALWAYS suicidal by the end of the semester. So basically I'm productive for 4 months and I spend the next 6 picking up the pieces.

cuz you are otherwise useless pieces of shit. just kidding. combination of not enough training, fear that follows, attending wants it, enough training but bad training, etc. my wife does adult neuro and she cant even remember how to replace Na after scholarship level med school..., trust me specialist, it aint ez being responsible for 35 specialties, you'll understand when you're ten years out

So basically what I meant with my question is: will I survive medical school?

What year are you in?

never seen a case personally

What was your role name in the show?

i noticed a real "let down" process where the adrenaline was high for months then i went home and couldn't relax. spending free time watching porn didn't help. exercising outside sounds like the lame advice that typically goes in one ear and out the other but it is powerful. start doing this and consider a mellow drug like lexapro 5 mg for a few days, up slowly to 10-20 mg and likely you will do much better.

I vaguely recall when I was a kid they where trying to put me on ritalin but my parents absolutely refused. So all my school was poor grades. In work they wanted me to do study some stuff at home to further myself but I couldnt study. As soon as try to study my mind starts racing and lots of thoughts and ideas flowing through so its impossible to concentrate. I read way to many stories about how if you go in and ask for stuff like ritalin or adderall they make you jump through a bunch of hoops like taking tests that last hours and too me that seems hypocritical because if you really had ADD you'd never be able to sit through all that. And also hear too many stories that they just think you're trying to seek drugs and write on your record you where seeking drugs and then thats stuck on your record forever.

I'm only joking. I have nothing but respect for you guys and am boundlessly impressed by everything you have to know and deal with. Neuro is mainly just a group of people circle jerking while localizing lesions.

if you are in med school fight to the finish, do what u gotta do, if you are asking and not yet in with that question you likely won't get in...not to crush your dream but just sayin

attending for 8 years

I'll test your legitimacy a bit with three questions. First one in the picture. Next one coming up. Make me proud.

Rodney DickHerField

It's all about triage. ER is for traumatic injury and acute 'I'mmadiewithoutintervention' illness like, say, meningitis. Anything less gets to sit on their butts until they get around to you, however much you hurt. If you start crashing where you sit, that's different, but observation is part of the deal. Same with a regular doctor's office in that regard.

i'm sorry to hear that, you've had ADHD forever it seems, see a doc that knows the condition, i mean not in the ER, you should get help and your life should improve quite a bit

Easiest way to get opiates prescribed? Around oxycodone strength minimum. Already have a klonopin script just need to lock down opiates

spondylolysis

im a random user had this as a kid in l4 and l5

second question

lol, not to circle jerk now but i see how hard my wife has to work to land on a firm diagnosis, takes weeks to months at times I respect her work as well.

not an ER question but ya the other guy gets it right

u sell it or abuse it yourself? either way congrats, i'm sure that is something you will never regret. youtube.com/watch?v=ht7mxF9XZiA

ok hahaha fair enough
here's the final question. Make me proud

i'm going with C vs D, again this is not an ER question

The right answer is D.

google man, i could just cheat, but ya, i'd guess inguinal

I've head that its common that at first they try to sell you the idea / talk you into trying depression meds because of comorbidity with add which is counter intuitive because if I dont think if I where depressed I'd want to try to improve myself. Any way to bypass all that and all the other hoops they want you to jump through and tests and just get straight to business?
I know not an ER doc obviously, but a doctor is still a doctor that has insights about other doctors.

Symptom of Centralized healthcare, others are more expensive and harder to fire people (because gov. Job).

Radiologist here. Do you fuckers even do physical exams any more? Should we just set up a CT scanner in the waiting room and pass every single patient through it on their way through the door? Fuck me, the last ER shift I was on, I read eighty-four CT scans and like 20 plain films. Get some clinical exam skills, for chrissakes.

But, hey, thanks for the money.

>he idea / talk you into trying depression meds because of comorbidity with add which is counter intuitive because if I dont think if I where depressed I'd want to try to improve myself. Any way to bypass all that and all the other hoops they want you to jump through and tests and just get straight to business?
>I know not an ER doc obviously, but a doctor is still a doct


all of "what they wanna do" is for a reason my friend, even if you find that annoying. trust the process, get well, especially as a psych patient (i am one also) you are in the worst position to try to judge the clinicians or try to influence the care protocol

Once a month take 30 MG of oxycodone but my source is in jail, prescribed klonopin 1mg 2x a day. My prescription is more harmful than my once a month recreational use.

Yeah that was too easy. Though the answers to case studies are easier in this book, the interactive questions are more specialty related. I don't know your specialty, so didn't really make a lot of sense to ask at random. What is your specialty btw?

Biggus dickens syndrome

ya, to rule out disease without a scan means you have to trust your ability to examine the patient, not an easy task. course if you could stomach seeing patients you wouldn't hind behind that big screen you biatch! my radiology buddies dad goes into a hospital for an nstemi, he asked me questions, sounded like the radiologist was a patient not a doctor. soon you will also be that dumb FYI bro. but ya i appreciate the reads, tough job

>there was this one chick I rounded on during residency. her nip popped out of her gown.

You get used to it fast, in my experience. Gynecology clinic at the university student health center was an eye opener the first couple of times, and then became a tedious job. I stuck my fingers in more sorority girls' pussies than the captain of the football team, and mostly hated it. Fucking OB/GYN was my very worst clinical rotation.

i agree, switch to ssri from klonopin, not the same tolerance issues

ob gyn, major reverse sexist cancer bitches, they hated me...mainly cuz i exude toxic masculinity, again, no really, half punjabi so i gave them major penis envy

Well, my psychiatrist actually put me on Modafinil, because depression and overall burning out was getting me to experience hypersomnia and exhaustion. I'm not sure it was the right call, but I'm only M-2. Can't really be questioning doctor's orders. Though she also put me on 20mg of citalopram.
I honestly couldn't tell you if it worked or not. By the end of this semester I was still feeling like shit. I actually nearly committed suicide.

>What would you say the greatest success story you've experienced is? Someone you really thought wasn't going to make it, but you and your department pulled them through anyway?

In my case (radiologist again) it was one of my greatest mistakes and one of my greatest saves in the same patient. This guy couldn't breathe after a CT guided needle biopsy of a lung mass an hour or two earlier. He had bad emphysema and in retrospect was not the greatest candidate for this procedure. Sure enough he developed a tension pneumothorax. I was a couple of weeks into my first private job after training and not very well trained on interventional stuff. But I got a chest tube into him with no trouble, just a big rush of air, and turned him from purple to pink in about fifteen seconds. His family thought I was a miracle worker like Dr. House. I didn't tell them I was an idiot for going ahead with the needle biopsy and not letting a chest surgeon handle it.

went to the ER for my herniated disc. was in literal crippling pain. they gave me a muscle relaxer, a norco and then a shot that i can't remember what it was. my question is
>what was mystery shot?
>they shot me up with morphine an hour later
that mystery shot worked fucking wonders

this is getting too deep for me friend, i'm ER so i'm now getting into territory where i'm the same as you

Switched to klonopin because of side effects of keeping me awake. This is for treating insomnia going to try and get Lunesta next visit. I have to take 2mg to fall asleep, then 4-5 hours more to stay asleep. I just supplement with rc benzos when I run out of my script, hopefully they will do a good taper and not a sudden drop I'd probably just off myself rather than deal with benzo wd again.

the big D

benzo WD fucking sucks.

try trazadone 50 mg, not habit forming, excellent insomnia medicine, that'd always be my 1st choice

well, case closed.

it was likely dilaudid, many addicts try to get it in ERs

You mean about the field of specialty being completely different or the feeling?

>ob gyn, major reverse sexist cancer bitches, they hated me...mainly cuz i exude toxic masculinity, again, no really, half punjabi so i gave them major penis envy

Oh, totally the same for me, the chief resident was a lesbian mega-cunt who hated all men, and I am a redneck who didn't give a fuck about the subject. Almost failed the rotation.

everyone must be fappin now, adios amigos, gotta try to figure out if i can avoid AMT with the new trump tax plan comin out

these cunts all have man envy, that's their dirty secret, simple shameless jealousy, we can all pretty much kill them with our bare hands and dont have periods to deal with and embarrassing emotions (they know how fn crazy they are) etc, much worse to be a woman and they know it...cunts

That's kind of what's bringing me down to be honest. Like I've been having to get grades that are above average so I can apply for this Harvard Research Program my university offers when I'm M-4. So, I'm studying like a motherfucker to be able to apply for it and stand out among my classmates. But at the end of the day I keep thinking that if I'm already destroyed right now, what the fuck is gonna happen to me in residency because I'm very aware the toll is heavier, much heavier than this

great hanging with you anons, fags, newfags etc. remember to jerk a little less and get outside more, with the sun and with actual relationships, adios

I've just never had luck with ssris I went through 5 before I just said fuck it and got tired of paying for doctor visits. Lunesta looks promising as it's not a benzo like ambien. I've had sleeping problems for 9 years and I'm 20 now. When I said fuck it to keeping on with the doctor I just smoked weed for sleep and it was perfect, but sadly I can't so that anymore. I've been addicted to benzos before but that was over a year ago so I don't abuse my script I just legitimately can't sleep and it fucks the rest of my life/mind up. Currently out of my script and rcs so I'll be up for 19-20 hours despite waking up at 8 today. I've done all the sleep hygiene shit and tried everything otc I just have bad issues sleeping. Klonopin helps with my anxiety when I need it but it is shit for sleep imo.

Any advice for an MS1 torn between Family Medicine and EM? How bad was EM residency? How do you like your partners?

Later, doc. Thanks for the answers.

have you tried phenibut or kratom for sleep?

take it down a notch dude, you need to bring it down a notch in performance and deal with basic mental health. M2 was the worst fucking year of my life. residency was tough at times but at least i wasnt in a corner reading for hours like some animal in a cage. get outside and get a mild cardio daily for 15 min, jerk it less, drink less alcohol for sure...your outlook and feeling burned out will be less, hang in their bro, i got therapy in med school prior to graduating near middle of my first tier med school and finishing residency in ER

That is, indeed, one hell of a screw-up, holy shit. Way to save, though.

family has less wear and tear on your soul and life as you get out, but a lot less cash and ER is fun to do cuz u hang with da homies in the pit, you fight together, good camraderie

Yeah about as effective as klonopin. Even if I fall asleep I'm awake in 4~ hours and have to redose. Lunesta seems good for keeping you out for 8 hours.

Santa Clara facility?