Can we get a Monday night feels thread going?

Can we get a Monday night feels thread going?

Bump

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have some cow ass

Wrong thread furryfag

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Stolen from another post I didn't care to go and find.
Do you ever think about the men that died at Normandy? Did they get up in the morning and shower, brush their teeth, and think to themselves "This is the day we win"? Then, as they lay there laying on the beach, know in that moment of them dying that for them, the battle is lost. They will never get to see the fruits of their labor, and for all they will ever know they could die in vain. How sad must it be to know that in your final seconds, you have no idea if you will have a positive, if at all an impact on the world? To have it be unknown weather or not you will be portrayed as a hero or villain, martyr or fool, all while having seconds left to think about it.

Damn, it's been a while since I've been in a good feels thread.
Life has been pretty shitty lately.

I dont know why im single but im lonely and want to die

Father died the week before my uni started. Emotionally and mentally unstable Mother is ill and I'm working fulltime/school full time. I'm so tired, I haven't had time to grieve for my father passing since the day he passed of cancer in front of my eyes. Mother always tells me to be a man and keep my chin up whenever I try to tell her how I'm feeling. 4 hours of sleep a day, no time for games, only a short while to post or browse in my leisure. I held up fine,totally fine for a long time. I had a woman who was 4 years older than me to love and to emotionally care for me, not that I could cry in her arms or whine about my day to her, but someone to hold and feel their love for me. She left me just today,I think this was my last straw. I don't wanna die, just disappear with some drugs to ease the pain.

Honestly, you need a male friend to unload this shit onto. You cannot unload emotional baggage to a woman, she'll think you're a Pussy and respect you less. Men are discouraged from healthy male interaction these days. I think you need a friend.

I would love to. It was already hard enough for a girl friend. But I never unloaded my emotions to her because I'm not really one to do that took a lot to happen for me to say this. All my friends were ascribed to the macho men of few emotions and more hard work. They're all working or schooling away and were never ones to share emotions

Anyone lurking?

always

Unload that shit here then. Life isn't fair and it shits on you 24/7. I grew up surrounded by women and still have trouble expressing myself to other men the way that others do.
Do you feel fucked over by how you were raised?

i'm alone i've been always alone, 26 never had a gf nor a bf virgin kissless bastard here

going to spend the holydays alone for the 6th year in a row i just get wallmart pre made shit and drink until i faint out

everyone in my street are good loving families that atleast put some xmas stuff and have kids and all that shit


me? i'm just a loney guy without family friends or atleast someone close sometimes i dont see why i keep going

i dont see why keep moving by myself, why i havent end it.

i'm guessing i'm just too dumb to realise it, the thread is apparently dead, goodnight and happy holydays

Why alone bro?
Social anxiety? Depression? Autism? Ugly as shit? A little bit of all?

I feel you, sort of, but I am becoming ok with that, I have a gf 4 or 5 years ago (the only one I have), only lasted 3 months, of that, only the half was good, the other half a lot of fucking drama and shitty situations, I was in a limit of anxiety and depression, but at the same time dont wanting the relationship to be over, funny bastard I am.

So, I dont know, I feel lonely since the past year, but when I remember the drama, I kinda feel better for being lonely, plus is way too cheap to only waste money in yourself.
I kinda realizing women are selfish, some of them are consious of that, some others dont, but act the same selfish way anyway. So, if you consider a weak or "change-able" man, be cautious, because women love tender bait.

But, I feel you, I want someone to look after me, to text or call me when I am at work, someone to spend hot nights or just chill movies night, I dont know, the kind of disney shit lover do, I am that kind of guy, but when I put my mental health in balance, I realise is a risky bussiness, because what I previously say about women.

If they can, they will rip you apart, in every way possible, and then jump on the next victim.
Too few women will look for you and will not be selfish, but even they are programed to be like that, so, will never be a decent end.
Well, at least in my short experience and looking opinions of other fellas I am realising that.

A lot of all my dude i'm not too much autist tho

i want just someone to interact to but i dont really have anyone as i said in my post really no one i'm not exagerating things

i can interact with people online but i cant really get a hug the touch or interaction irl

I am I little bit like that.
I was worse back then.
I dont just and talk to people like that, like a normal person do, or can.
It is hard to me at first, when a go to a new place (workplace, school, etc) I dont talk to anyone, I could do that forever, someone has to talk to me first, and then I become little less anxious and start talking to a small circle of people, before I wasnt able to do even that, I just couldnt.
What it help me I think is that I put myself in tough situations, working in places that you need to socialize or talk to other to get the job done, get a fellow that is super extrovert, so he wont be awkard around you if you dont talk, let them make the first move, for me is easy that way. The point is you putting out of your confort zone, make yourself awkard in social interaction, that is the only way to try, believe me.
Im still super beta, most around women, but I have grow, and I want to keep doing it, IT IS hard, but that is the only way I know.
And what you say about no one touching you. maybe is something wrong with you, wear clean clothes every day, that fit you well, decent colors, shower everyday too, put yourself together, I dont know.
I see some of my friends getting a lot of women apretiation and hugs and shit, but I wasnt, at first it was really sad, today still is, but I think I am not a "hugable" guy, my face looks mad all the time, I have a really serious face almost always, not because I wanted to, but because I born with that bitch face.
So maybe is that, people think you are grumpy and dont want human contact, even if in the inside is the opposite.
I feel you men, I really feel you.
I think not every men are made to be handsome or atrative (even if they are not physically atractive, just "magnetic attractive") nor to get womens attention, natural selection I guess.

I love someone that not only does not love me and never loved me, but is entirely incommunicado and out of my life altogether. This individual used me and hurt me. How do I forgive myself for making myself so vulnerable to someone that acted as a strict utilitarian?

>Be me, a NEET
>One day I go for a walk, very unusual for me
>Girl comes along who turns out to be an old classmate of mine
>She says hi
>Im taken a-back from my social encounter, but I'm happy that someone actually spoke to me
>We run in a couple times after that, always smiling and whatnot
>I rarely spoke back because I was insecure, but I was happy nonetheless
>Almost a year goes by and beat myself up because I can't manage a decent conversation with another human being
>She becomes depressed and talks to me less and less
>Finally pieced it together and finds out she had feelings for me, so i make letter sharing my feelings
>She doesn't give a fuck
>This is all my fault, she hates me and I deserve this, I had one chance to turn my life around
>I go into a deep depression myself after I try my hardest to get into contact with her but fail
>It's clear she wants nothing to do with me
>Is finally done with life, I'm a NEET so what do I have to live for anyways
>I attempt to jump off cliff but I fail miserably, I don't want to talk about that
>After my suicide attempt i get sent away where they can watch me for a year

Come on laugh at me Sup Forums, I fucking deserve it.

Just work on yourself, I feel really lonely this days, plus, I fell in love on a coworker that I know in fact, that will never see me as boyfriend material, and she is nice to me, but I know I am not her type, and is hard because cant stop feeling for her, plus I have to see her almost every day, the shit got so hard I change my working hours so I wont see her so much, only in the shift turn, but it is still enough to see her that small amount of time to feel so dumb in love.

Still, im gonna keep that secret to myself, not the first time, not the last, and I am doing excercise and diet, I dropped out of college last june, so need what to do with my life (recent jobs pay suck, need more cash to live decent here) want to take some classes about everything, want to improve my english, learn some art (paint or photo), some computers class (i am interested in that), learn to play some instrument, everything I can I will do it.

I am in a point in my life that I need to know what the fuck am I going to do with it, because I am 24, and if I didnt do something with that, in 20 I will be a 44 loser with a lame job, dont want that to me bro.

Human contact is so comfy, but it has a price to pay, not always is chill or nice, and in my case, I think I will die alone, never will marry or have children, even if i wanted to, but I am starting to think that is not for me, so I will keep my head busy in something that will leave me with something, fun or knowledge, and that will give me more money.

I dont know what kind of life you have and want bro, but hope you get what you want, bur remember, work on yourself, and dont expect that life came from the skies, you need to look into that, and fight for it, sadly, that is the only way.

Dont feel lonely this seasons, in my country the good stuff happens in dec 24, not the 25, the 25 is to cure the hangover and to eat lots of leftovers, the 24 is the big day, but I am going to work in the night turn, so not everyone is going to be with someone this season, lot of us are going to be alone as well.

Hope you have a decent life bro, we all deserve one.

I'm fighting that feeling again today. It's that feeling you get when you told yourself that you had what it took to go it alone and then something happens to throw that idea back in your face. Today I have what must be the worst flu I've ever had in my life. Maybe the flu has compromised my thoughts but it really sank in, the choices I've made, when I buckled a trash can into the passenger seat for me to puke in should the need arise on my way to the grocery store to restock my empty home with the food and medicine. It's these kinds of moments that remind me that isolating myself from the world has marooned me. And in these moments I can't help but think about the lonely years to come. It makes me think that waiting around for someone worth caring about the show up is a farce. I've been thinking a lot lately about just finding someone reliable and settling down. Gay men marry straight women for their own ends. Would it be so wrong if I did something similar? If I found a reliable person to mix my finances with? I could pretend to love them, pretend to be attracted to them. I'm not sure what would be better. Me, alone, struggling, but true to myself. Or financially stable but living a lie?

I watched a video the other day, it says that society program us to feel us bad from being lonely, and that society shame us for being that way, like words like "why are you alone" "You are not married?!?!?!?!?!" "You are weird for being alone", that kind of shit.
The video says that is not bad doing things our own way, but we feel bad when society shame us from doing that, and to me that makes a lot of sense.
Yeah, in bad times, like sickness, it would be great if someone could be with us taking care of us, but answering your question is better to live alone but free and mentally sane, that a big lie and hating everything around you for life just for a few cuddles and some to bring you hot beverages when you are sick.

It takes courage to accept that way, accept that maybe we are not made to be with someone, or that we are not made to being loved, dont know.

It is hard, to me is, every day, waking up and accepting that, and I think always will be, but I remember my first and last gf, some things were great, but all ended up really bad for me, and when I think how bad I was feeling, and how I feel today, it is better today.
I feel like shit these day, dont get me wrong, but is better that those day, filled with self hate, anxious as fuck and depressed for being in love, it just suck.

Bump, while I prepare my story

Went on a date with a Tinder chick to practice more. I still can't get physical enough to go for the kiss during the date... idk, I'm just too friendly. We talk and laught, but I can't take it there. I have no problem when I hit on the in the club, because the atmosphere is right, or when they agree to come by my place and fuck. But dates seem retarded to me, I just start talking and chilling with a drink in front of me... it all feels too friendly.

bumping with feels

Ok Sup Forums here goes nothing
>be me
>2014
>fr3shman in highschool
>goes by QUICK but not fast enough to see a sore thumb
>decent 7.5/10
>see her one day
>never shows up for the rest of the year
>ok.wav
>enter sophomore year
>become friends with smoll friend
We'll call her men
>have biology with her and become good friends
>find out she's friends with 7.5
We'll call her Marx
>nem introduces me to Marx
>Marx is ball of nerves and has many an anxiety problem
>never get the chance to actually get to know marx
>have a thing for nem at this point so fuck off Marx
>enter junior year
>have almost all classes with nem and Marx
>finally get through to Marx
>hitch nem up with a bf
>pout about it for the rest of the year
>finally get over her
>during this time become good friends with Marx
>get signs that she might like someone
>definitly know it's not me
>still have good friendship
>enter senior year

Cont.
>jump into school
>don't worry so much about having a gf or many meaningful relations
>nope.jpeg
>Marx start a growing on me
At this point in time, I have been doing a good job of suppressing my emotions and keeping grades in check
>one day after school I stay behind with one of the cooler teachers
>ohlook.webm
>Marx is there
>... oh I didn't know you liked to stay behind here after school too user!
>yeah... totally...
>teach is getting ready to leave
>ok,, best be on my way
>Marx and I head out the door together
>I'm going back to the doors user...
>asks if I want to come with
>Sure.gif
>walk her back to her room
>make awkward small talk the whole way
>heart beating like a Jack hammer
>say bye and walk away
>I guess this means I like her...
>over next few weeks grow a little more attached
>start writing journals to clear my mind
>one day she brings up the topic crushes
>user do you like anyone?
>...
>c'mon, you can tell me!
>...
>fine then I won't tell you who I like...
>ok.jpg
>he doesn't know it, but he's already my husband
>sweating bullets, heart going APE
>never bring it up...
>few weeks go by, still walk her to her dorm on occasion
>one time she even asked if I could and sounded upset when I didn't give a straight answer
>fine.mov
>almost end of first semester
>crushes start to become a focal point in conversations regularly
>confesses that she likes some other guy and asked me if it was a good idea
>say go for it, and to not hold back
>mfw she does it...

You need a break from life before you force yourself into one with either drugs or death. Fall semesters should be over soon. Take the next semester off and focus on your mental health. I said i was going to take the semester after the one i was enrolled in off for mental health and got dumped from a girl i legitimately loved for three years and got three Fs. No one should long for death. I'm still trying to muster the courage to get up and going again. Im going back to school to fix my gpa but i got fat as shit from not doing anything and still feel like ive failed but i got help and they helped me understand what i value in life and how to try to value myself as much as others.

>she never gets any,actual sign from him
>heart broken that I'm not,the one she liked
>still maintain happy demeanor while I'm with her
>nem becomes like a sister to me and is willing to be my wing man
>never take her up on her deal
>few months pass
>prom is in a few weeks
>be in cafeteria
>Marx tells me about how she has a wager with some of her friends that if they can't get prom dates they're going to go together
>awkward silence because if it were any time before she told me her crushes name, I would have happily asked her out
>eventually asks me
>never answer her
>she follow up with telling nem if i would have been cool
>men says to wait and let him think about it
>yeahno.png
>feel guilty about leaving her unanswered
>message her that I'm sorry for not answering her before
>says she already asked out her crush
Long story short, both end up going to last prom as singles

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>senor trip announced
>LA for a week
>room with 3 other people
>Marx is ecstatic to hear I'm going
>depart at 6am while still freezing balls
>brought along plush "Cadillac of comfort" blanket
>be on bus
>Marx walks in and sits next to me for a second
>sings up to me and says that I looked nice and warm
>OHSHITWUT.avi
>Marx gets up and moves to back of bus to be with nem
>bus stops a few hours on the road for restroom break
>Marx is one of the first to get off
>sits down next to me to let other people pass
>highs and rests head on shoulder and says I'm like a teddy bear
>gets up and leaves for the bathroom
>never see her for extended period of time on the trip
>last night of trip
>down to get beer and play cards against humanity
>go to all other rooms to see if anyone wants in
>hang out for a while in Marx room to talk to nem and another friend
>tell them if they want, to come up for pizza and cards
>don't actually say Marx was invited
>eventually a few show up, and the party gets started
>roomies pull out Xbox and hook up the tv
>knock on door
>every one thinks it the hotel security
> calmly get to door peephole and it's Marx

>be bi-curious
>be extremely lonely
> to the point of having two breakdowns in one week
>go on /lbgt/
>post my body details
>get a reply from a guy who says I'm cute
>start getting an erection
>learn he is In Canada\
>I'm in Texas
>add him on discord
>talk to him everyday for a month straight
> sexting and video chats
>we (or least I) get really close to him
>October
>silence
>text him trying to get a response
>silence
>go through a lot of emotional pain
>november
>sends me pic related
>I take him back
>we talk for a little while
>video chat once
>usual small talk
>get caught up with work
>tend to forget stuff
>don't talk to him a little bit
>go back
>text him "goodnight"
>this message could not be sent
>wtf
>right click on hsi icon
>we are not friends
>try sending him a request
>get the invalid id error
>he blocked me
>without even saying why
that is all I want,a why.

im a retard who failed to an hero
TWICE user
im pretty sure there is someone who failed three times

>let her in
>wuts going on?
>uh... nothing illegal
>user! Let me In!
>give in, whole room lives back up once they know it's not security or a chaperone
>have the same "Cadillac of comfort" blanket on the bed
>I get in bed and she follows suit
>says she's cold, and to her defence it was
>just use my blanket Marx
>thanks user
>we both get under the covers
>eventually at 5am it's time for everyone to get ready to leave
>Marx leaves, thanks us and for a to her room
>fold up my blanket, and still has her faint perfume smell on it
>fast forward to next week
>assembly for senior trip
>show up early and nod off to speech about decorations and donations
>feel light pressure on shoulder
>probably one of my guy friends trynna be cute
>ignore it
>hands and arms creep behind my neck and across my cheat
>this is a little too friemdly...
>still don't budge
>hands cross, and pulls me in for a hug
>smell Marx signature scent
>HOLUPTHEREFRIENDO.exe
>too nice a moment to ruin
>she finally let's go
>disturbed yet slightly amused i try to ask whats going on
>she leans in for one more "over friendly" hug but this time when it's over she does this little dopey smile

Yep that's true.
Personally I would have make you see the good side of being single, bringing you to luxury prostitutes, when drunk and talking about your feelings... until you will feel better.

So what's you discord m8?

toast#4305

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closest I've ever been in my life to someone who I've been crushing on
>nem looks over and tells her to quit it and stop being weird
>never ask, OR pursue Marx because of my competition
>graduate
>finally free from the Marx menace
>she texts me when she moves into her college dorm
>has bad anxiety about college
>still try and keep up an act to seem like a "cool friend" but getting tired of this act
>start to message more often
>finally get over not having her as a gf
>talk on phone more frequently
>a few days ago she asks if I want to "do laundry with her"
>uh.html
>sure...
>video calls me
>hold awkward conversation about the bull shit we faced this semester
>all our calls go,until she is tired and falls asleep
>most calls end with her in a sleepy haze becoming an autist