So I've been having an issue lately Sup Forums. It's pretty serious

so I've been having an issue lately Sup Forums. It's pretty serious
>be me
>be alcoholic so I pass out after I fuck my wife pretty much immediately, unless it's in the morning where I shower and go to work
>be uncut
>when I fuck at night I don't wash my cock after bc Insta sleep, and just recently, by the time I shower in the morning, my cock is a bit red and itchy around the head.
>brb researched it and discovered its yeast infection (aka thrush)
>brb went to potato doctor (female) and she glanced at my cock for a few seconds and said convincingly that it's the herps
>brb 3 days of living hell but finally got results back
>female doctor tells me it's just thrush after three days of living hell but no apologies bc doctor
>my wife doesn't experience thrush, just her juices seem to give it to me. She should be the one with issues bc I just raw dog her bc she's on the pill so you'd think my millions of dead swimmers up there would cause more of an issue compared to a little pussy juice that I quickly wipe off prior to passing out.
>why now after so many womens and so many nights the same all my sexually active life?
My immunity has gone to shit? How to fix? Any med-fags? Inb4 aids.

Also true weird sex/major scare stories thread. Maybe we can learn something on Xmas day.
Pic unrelated. Wait wat?

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Thrush is in your mouth, same thing, though. Candida. Yeast infection.

If you really think you have a yeast infection, get some Monostat, even better, just buy the ointment, which is sold seperately, always store brand. Look at the ingredients for the 1 day, go find the ointment, buy 2 of them, shower twice a day, dry off, and then apply a layer.

Your doctor didn't tell you it's thrush on your dick, either. Stop lying. Christ you can't be this stupid.

med fag

Mr doctor sir I have a question to, can I get rid of worms with eating garlic with milk?

Doctor said it's herpes. For a med fag you should learn to read.
I have ointment for thrush and it's working. Just perplexed why I'm suddenly getting it now when wife doesn't have. I thought mostly girls suffer from it.

Disgusting

Epsom salts user. A few heaped spoons in water and a few more glasses after that.
Thank me later.

sounds like you need to start condickting medical experiemnts by letting other guys fuck your wife and then examine their penis regularly to see if there are similiar development

Yeah good idea if I was a cuck :/

that's not cuckolding it's for science
how do you know your wife hasn't got some mutant alien vagina? you seen the movie aliens they like spit acid and stuff

Nice trips
Doesn't change the fact that you sound 12.

>apoLOGies

You're just insecure.

Coconut oil. I had a similar issue a while ago due to an ex that had a recurring yeast monster for a couple months. Would pop up after her period and on two occasions we banged before she realized.

Take an oral antifungal, and rub your dick in extra virgin coconut oil a few times a day. Its a powerful antifungal and antibacterial, and it will soothe and protect your rotten dick flesh. I got cracked dry skin from the yeast and it helped with that as well. It works pretty well.

I found the creams they prescribe also tended to kind of irritate and burn my skin, but coconut oil did not. I know it might sound like hippy bullshit, I was certainly skeptical at first, but there is some sound science to back it up, and it worked well for me.

Wat? How do you get that conclusion about OP? Or just a pre-neckbeard brat?
You will lose your v-card someday user. Have faith in yourself.

Hello user, fellow alcoholic here, also a microbiology fag (8 years in).

Alcohol intake tends to create the right conditions for candida and other fungal overgrowth. I wouldn't worry about it too much. If you are able to cut down on the alcohol consumption, then your fungal infection should go away on its own.

You know there are consequences to this lifestyle. This is one of the least worrisome.

Get cut or learn to clean your anteater dick.

Thanks user. Do you know if the coconut oil alone works? If you are taking other stuff with it, I'm thinking the coconut oil just made your dik nice and soft skinned. (Mrs has a jar of coconut oil so if I'll try)

Don't be mad you can't enjoy sex nearly as much as I do user. Or at the very least project that anger onto your Jew controlled rents.

My cherry got popped when I was 14.
OP is obviously a typical male with a fragile ego. women are not property and it's childish, immature, and takes a lot of insecurity to pretend like they're a personal dick sleeve.

Ty user. Alcohol is the devil for me. I actually could have had a great life without it.

I had sex with hook. She sucked my dick bare and I spent a week freaked out thinking I caught herpes. I tested a week after and 5 weeks after. Both were negative. I still get anxiety over it though and wonder if I should retest again.

If "enjoying" is getting that shit on your dick, I'm glad I'm missing out.

The reason why you're getting thrush is because of your shit diet, shit drinking and shit lifestyle.

One day you're gonna come home and find your wife getting fucked by NIGGER Chad Thundercock because he doesn't flop down asleep on her after giving her the worst 3 minutes of her life being 2 of them is getting you off of her.

The shower for your wife is probably more pleasurable so she can wash your greasy stink off.

Hooker...damn auto correct

I'm uncut and I've never had problems. Basic hygiene applies to (sadly not) most to us.

>huehuehue

not gonna get a pity party here pussy, quit that toxic bullshit & just drink every now & then or you deserve all this shit

Experience has shown that coconut oil alone seems to work fairly well. I just suggested the oral antifungal to be extra safe.

Make sure its extra virgin, and ideally organic. The reason has to do with how its processed and what the oil contains in the end.

found that delusional autistic faggot who actually thinks his opinions matter

Same shit happens to me. On random hook up with girls I have to wash my cock very well after to get all the lube and shit out from my foreskin or I get thrush or balantis. Also some women's vag flora just doesn't jive with my body and I get thrush if I'm not careful.

Keep that shit clean op. Baby wipes are a quick solution also if your outdoors, camping and such

And that's why I got the circumcision so I don't get cunt cheese dickitis. I feel like Fucking invincible like I'm Superman over here, you dick cheese sufferer you!

Imma try this.

You're not wrong. Men should almost never get a yeast infection unless their lifestyle and hygeine is awful, unless its passed from an infected parter.

OP Your girl has been lucky so far if she hasn't caught it, and it says something if she's healthy enough to fight it off and you arent.

Do you ever put it up her ass?

Except you're wrong and you can still get it. You mutilated yourself for no good reason.

Another foreskin loser. Ahahah! I'm cut son, dick is like a refined cut diamond. You jelly?

LoL, the broken English really made this gold3n.

Yeast and dick cheese are not the same thing. If you weren't mutilated you'd know that. Dick cheese is just a byproduct of natural oils and dead skin cells and what not. You wash your dick whenever you have a shower, its non existent.

Yeast is a fungal infection. A foreign organism, which your mutilated genitals could still get.

You’re a disgusting fuck, dude, take a shower and get off that bottle. Nothing but fucked up shit is going to happen, if it hasn’t happened yet.

It cool to get fucked up drunk but man, if you can’t get a hold of your shit- you know it’s got you by the balls.

Take up another hobby- like chronic masturbation. Totally safe and you feel like you’re on crack after your 12th session

Addendum to the coconut oil thing, its also a great massage oil and lube. Some skin types may suffer a breakout though, so experiment a little first.

I had one ex who brought home a jar, and we'd massage each other, then have delicious coconut sex. It was amazing.

News to me, and I'm 43. Had more partners than I should have.

Yes, for absolutely no reason mutilate your dick.

Sex with a hook.

No, I have still have all my nerve endings and natural skin. I'm not missing part of my dick, I don't need lube to jerk off, and sex is far better.

Listen son, the boy gots bitch cheese on his glands and it colonized. My glands are dry. Who wins?

I had an ingrown hair on my john and thought it was herpes. Once after a hot tub which was being cleaned and an anal sesh my sick was burned and I thought I had a really fucked up Sti but I was only allergic to chlorine.

You chose to get it cut bc you had phimosis. Be honest. No sane adult would do it for any other reason.

Heigine is shit as I mentioned bc I don't wash after sex just pass out bc alcohol
Clearly health is shit bc alcohol

Ever think to not sound retarded and actually tell an user something They don't already know?

I know I need to quit alcohol. It's just a lot easier said than done. Weak minded, whatever you want to call me, it's something I want to do.

ITT: Uncut fags troll other uncut fags by pretending to be cutfags.

Uncut fools are more likely to suffer STDs. Enjoy your dick fungus.

Ahahahaha, yes, I had phimosis. I'm safer because of it though.

Not you. Dry dick is not a good thing. Its meant to be protected and kept moist by the foreskin. Having a dry cracked leathery penis is not ideal. I bet its calloused and lacks feeling too.

Don't think being cut makes you immune to infections, that is a dangerous lie spread by cutfags to justify their mutilation. There is no science behind it, the one so-called study that gets cited has been debunked and discredited due to a total lack of scientific rigor or method.

No you aren't. That's an urban myth. You are not safer.
Also phimosis can often be treated without surgery. American doctors push mutilation as a first approach for some bizarre reason but it should be last resort.

I don't know your situation but I would not be surprised if surgery wasn't necessary.

Couple of times but most recent was a good 3-4 months go. Can't be related.

Oh laws. Delusional much?

I can't do the chronic masturbation thing. I never fap with my wife in play but the rest of your post is spot on.
I need a new hobby most deff.

Lube? You sure? It seems unnatural to stick up there..?

I win user. It'll be gone in a few days. You forever have dry dik. Sorry.

My dick is safer. The only weird shit I've suffered were those spiny like postules that comes and goes. Sweet fat girl I sleep with now and again, nimbled on them. Had me screaming like a bitch.

I know that feel, been an alcoholic for 9 years now.

No the one you replied to, but if you go bareback with every pussy you encounter you deserve to get a STD.

>why do I have to use lube errytiem I fap?

No they aren't. that is a blatant lie used to promote mutilation. There is no science behind it.

If anything having a dried out cut dick is more dangerous. What happens when dry skin cracks? microbes get in and take root.

Your dick is not safer. That is a lie you have been fed to justify it. It makes no difference.

That was twenty four years ago. Surgery was the only method. Had a 14 year old girlfriend who told me I was cheating myself out of a good time, and when I pissed foreskin ballooned. Right after the cut, say a week, she licked it. I trembled like an earthquake. Had head before but after the cut, it was too much. She made me cum with a few licks. I miss her.

I can cum much easier after no sex for a week. You couldn't fap for a week so you could cum easier. After all these years you still haven't realised that? Jesus user, think outside the box much?

Maybe. Or maybe it was the exposed glands that finally got some air.

We'll tell it straight user. Can you still cum so easily?
Was it just lust and super cum filled balls at the time or has that always been your experience?
If not then you know I'm right.

And by air you mean chaffed on the inside of your underwear forecer more. Face it man, eveyone cums in secands after not fapping for weeks, If i dont fap for a few days/a week and then get some head, i cum alsmost straight away.

Cut user left bc he knows you are right.

You were 14 and couldn't jerk off for a week, a light breeze would have done the trick.

This is wrong, that shit is just old wives tales and also you're gay

Its all the same, so maybe because I'm older and I'm just out there to get off. When I was younger I was more overwhelmed.

I've come almost every week for years now. I try to masturbate but its kinda dull. You pay on the front end or back end. What I mean is, you pay to get off or pay a girlfriend with time, money, resources and lots of words, to get off. I prefer to pay up front or find a girl who wants a few dollars.

I was 19 and had stitches in my dick.

I don't know how much incompetence it takes but your doctor is fucking bullshit and you got lues. The thing on your dick is called primary chancre.
Observe your lymph nodes and get fucking penicylin injection.

Also if it was that bad, you never had head with the foreskin rolled down, right? That is how its supposed to happen. The outer foreskin is insensitive and basically a meat shield.

You'd have gotten the same experience if you'd cured it without surgery.

In any case, being cut for medical reasons is pretty valid. Your shit works and you're happy with it, so power to you.

Its when people do it to infants that is becomes an issue.

Just don't buy into the myth that it makes you safer, and don't assume it makes you better than natural folks. It's fucking obnoxious and just promotes the culture behind mutilating infants for no good reason.

Ah my bad I misread that and thought you were 14 as well. That is kind of sketchy TBH, how was that not illegal?
in any case, you were a teenager still, same point applies.

My Urologist disagrees with you.

>illegal

CIA deals in coke to fund black ops. Its my dick and its their pussy. If they're down I'm down.

I prefer to 'pay'a gf through affection and good times and wake up beside her and have her willingly suck my dik and have her cum, as opposed to a whore who hates every second of it and just forces herself to put on an act to hopefully get you to come again so she can sustain her crack addiction or pay her bills for her half nigger kids.

You can't possibly think your lifestyle compares? I am sorry you are not good looking enough for a gf user but at least you have a job to pay for nasty hookers so you doing better than 90% of Sup Forums user. Never forget that. You are top 10% of the bottom 10%.
There has to be some comfort in that right?

Never has there been loli hotter than this camsexter.com/babes

Fuck off faggot.

Your diet and general health might be worse than hers. You should think about your diet and ph balance. Maybe your woman has pro biotics inside her that you dont have. If the herpes was a one time thing maybe you had a cut on your dingus that got infected.

I'm happy, or at the very least satisfied. Sure its a shit show life sometimes and its lonely sometimes, but I live according to my own rules and the best part, I get to cum.

>loli
>faggot

Retard.

I NEVER GOT THE HERPES. OMG LEARN TO READ Sup Forums.
I don't believe I could live your lifestyle user but I respect you for making something out of what you have. I hope you meet a nice girl someday. A soulmate even? Just don't expect an 8. You are a three so expect a three. You are a five, expect a five. That's how the world seems to roll in essence. Unless you are loaded with cash.

If I could line every one of you pedifile but too scared you'd be beat up by a 12 year old wannabes I gladly would. Gtfo of this thread. You alone are worse than 100 alcoholics.

Donest change the fact you'd be murdered in prison. 14 when you are 20 is creepy as fuck.

I remember seeing a high cheek bone African woman who was dating a tall chad. What the fuck does he see in her, I wondered. I worked in retail at the time, and as luck would have it, she joined our work crew. She wanted to be a nurse so she joined up to afford school. Curiosity took over and fuck me, her accent, her intelligence, everything about her. She was Nigerian. Fuck me, she had that ugly High cheek bone look, but she was velvety. I wanted her. If I could marry one like her, I don't care about the race, it'd be swell.

Boy, I'd fuck a 14 year old right now if it'd be just between her and I. Fucking DOJ is okay charging young teens as adults when it fits their narrative. Fuck them all!

Look, i low key agree with you, id fuck a 14 year old aswell, but it doesnt change the fact you'd be murdered in prison. Depending where you got sent

If you have the coin just import her. Hide 90% of your assets. YOLO user