Merry Christmas eve Sup Forums

Merry Christmas eve Sup Forums
Anybody got any Christmas stories

merry christmas OP, hope you have a good one, don't have a story though.

Merry Christmas eve Sup Forumsro
Dont have story as well

No story but merry christmas. :)

why not celebrate Hanukkah?

Merry Christmas user

hanukah ended dipshit

Merry christmas, asking for stories.

Merry Christmas, OP.

merry christmas to all of you faggots

I got a story: I fucked you are Mom

...

Its Christmas morning here ya cunts.
Merry Christmas ya pooftas

...

Merry Christmas/b/.

Honest story from shopping a couple nights ago.

> late night shopping, my typical thing.
> finish up at Khols around 11pm, still missing stocking stuffers for the wife.
> every year I usually get her some inappropriate stupid gift just for laughs.
> head downtown to our only adult store, decent place but shit selection.
> walk in and get the typical "hi can I help you find something."
> say nah, just looking for ideas for the wife.
> walk about for a few and grab a couple things, FUCK WATER lube and 10" dildo as a joke.
> go to checkout and realize the lady working behind the counter is our neighbor.
> not really a big deal, say hi and chat for a minute.
> she bags it up and throws in a Penis Lpstick for good measure.
> as I walk out "hope she enjoys the present!"
> "Well, we share a wall. You'll know as soon as I do."

Now I need to figure out how to wrap up a 10" dildo and lube so my kids don't have a clue...

Merry christmas guys.

As for a story, the only thing I have to tell you is the story about how my girlfriend got mad at me for some unclear reasons and me getting drunk on wine atm.

I'm just glad I'm drunk and not with her.

Hey man, every relationship has hiccups, I'm sure it'll turn out fine, just enjoy your alone time now.

holy kek

the only way to be happy in a relationship is to have no expectations at all

bump

Merry Christmas Sup Forumstards!

Found out that my ex girlfriend has a new boyfriend today. According to my friend hes a massive downgrade haha

>be me
>yesterday
>best friend hits me on whatscrap
>oioi my could you do something for me?
>beta me: sure anything
>i didnt had any time for shopping my brother brother wanted this 100$ speaker could you buy it for me and ill pay you back?
>beta me: yeah sure thing
>be me today
>sitting in front of the compyoutor writing this feeling like i cant do better then this at life and should continue with what i have

Twas the night before Christm'ass, when all through the house
Not a creature was slidding, not even my ass;
The niggers were hung by the chimney with care,
In hopes that Andy Sixx soon would be there;
The children were molested all night in their beds;
While visions of suicide danced in their heads;
Then aandy sixx showed up and fucked everyone's throats with his hot logs of shit

Use it as a coffee table decoration. That's what I do.

kek

Have you ever eaten just one of anything?

>Christmas 2k16
>Sitting and drinking at parents house after the christmas meal
>go outside to have a cigarette, let the dog run around too
>the dog ruins to the top of the garden and wont com back down
>go to investigate
>HolyShitTwoDogs.Jpg
>random black stray with no collar and a white spot on his head is peeking over the fence
>the house behind mine is empty
>Oh shit free dog
>coax the dog inside with dog treats
>this, scared but very friendly dog
>Family member suggests we call the non emergency line to see if it's a lost dog
>thirty minutes after calling in we get a call from a guy who lives nearly forty miles away
>"you found my dog"
>guy shows up with chocolate and wine, the dog looks happy and excited.
>tfw I am a Christmas miracle

nice story user

merry christmas Sup Forumsrothers