ITT: SHARE YOUR SECRETS / CONFESSIONS / FETISHES / RETARDED OPINIONS / ETC

ITT: SHARE YOUR SECRETS / CONFESSIONS / FETISHES / RETARDED OPINIONS / ETC

Retarded Opinion: your a faggot... and a tard

I once stole a plastic plane from school

I have a question since I know this thread will blow up any minute now.. what does it mean when an ex girlfriend messages me... Even after we argued continuously. She still tries to message me. She messaged me saying merry Christmas today... And now she wants to talk again even though she's still dating someone else.

I have a new girlfriend too and I'm just wondering what the fuck she wants...

Also secret of mine
(I save nudes)

bump

Pic related is friend of mine. She had recently broken up with a bf, and had a new BF that drove hours each weekend to visit her. I also found some nudes on here of here, and fuck can she suck a cock. Does she give off a slut vibe?

These threads are shit and belong on /soc/.

Oh wait, that's not a secret, or a retarded opinion. It's just a fact.

>she

>puts in the effort to use proper capitalization and english grammar
>uses or instead of nor
go to bed, kiddo.

>implying it's hard to utilize proper grammar
>kiddo
Underage faggot detected.

I raped my girlfriend in high school and then left after she got pregnant

dawww babby is butthurt. go to bed already.

So nice of you to take a break from sucking your dad's dick for 5 minutes to reply.

I went to pick up my friend one morning at his place because he needed a lift to court. I was still alittle drunk from the night before so i felt like shit i kept smoking cigarettes every 20 min so that didnt help my appearance. I get there and im waiting for the elevator with this arab lady and her baby. She had some bags and the baby on one arm. So i enter and click the floor im getting off and so does the lady. While were in the elevator the baby kept staring at me. It was like a cowboy Scene. None of us 2 bllinked. I thought he was gonna smile but nothing...just a blank face from the baby. The elevator stops and the lady prepares to get off. Right as shes leaving i make an ugly face and scare the baby. The doors closed and I continued my day without telling enyone

it was like 20 seconds

His dick must have been pretty hard to resist.

Do you regret it?

I cut ties with my family this year and I don't regret shit

A little. I've always wondered if she kept the kid and if so what it looked like

Probably came out looking like a nigger. You know, because the no dad thing and whatnot.

GF shot a man, and i made her preggo....

stuck my dick in crazy, fml

Hey, look at the bright side. She is crazy enough that anal will probably be a rad idea to her.

There is always a silver line. :)

>me 30
>at gf's parents house family christmas gathering
>some distant relatives come
>fun day, pool, sun food
>im sitting in the den chilled out
>one of the relatives daughter comes up to me and asks me to come upstairs
>eh? K i guess
>go up and she says shut the door so I shut it behind me
>she straight up takes her gown off and is completely naked and asks
>everyone is teasing me because I've never had an orgasm
>I won't tell anyone but can you please give me one, I don't know what to do, what is it and what do I do
>ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
>let me get back to you on that
>bail out of the room and then about 20 minutes later left for home with the gf
>been sitting here wide awake since freaked the fuck out
>have to go back to another party on NYE and theyll be there
>fucks sake

Well I'm white, she was a latina

Cut ties with friends I've known for years. Made me feel a lot better than I thought it would.

Look, man. It was a joke.
I am well aware that black people are not made simply by a father leaving the vessel in which he planted his seed.
It was just a small attempt to bring a smile to someone anonymous.

My fetishes are posted every thread and nobody seems to give a shit.

There. That's my secret. I'm the fag who cums like this around men in uniform

The Last of Us, Half-Life 2, and Ocarina of Time are my top 3 video games.
I've cheated my way to an A in multiple uni classes.
When I was younger, my dad used to shave me, cut my nails, trim my pubes, pop pimples on my face and back, would smell my penis to make sure it smelled nice, would do the same for my armpits, and would sometimes shower with me. This went on until I was around 16 and he would also beat me if I ever denied him.
I have a three inch erection and I’m circumcised.
Every weekend for the past four years, I’ve gone to the movies or taken a nap in my car and told my mom I was out with friends. I’ve also told her I’m dating a Korean girl who was in one of my uni classes.
When I was younger, girls at school used to hug me and random and would also tell me they loved me. Eventually I found out they would dare each other to hug guys they found especially creepy/ugly and I was a prime target. One of them also started a rumor I was stalking her because we lived in adjacent streets, after which most of my friends stopped associating with me.
Last semester I got screamed at by my dean for a solid 20 minutes for not registering in the proper classes. He told me I looked liked shit, said I was a lazy, stupid asshole, and asked repeatedly if I had psychological problems. I barley held it together, but I burst into tears as soon as I left his office.
Batman v Superman is my favorite movie
I like the band Echosmith
I hate Pixar. The Incredibles is one of the worst films I've ever seen and I cannot understand the following behind it.
I went to a dominatrix a few months ago and I'm probably going to go again soon.
I write shipping fanfiction and cheesy high school romance.

Poo?

I tell my family and friends I'm single because I work graveyard shifts 5 times a week but in reality I'm just afraid of commitment.

I make up that I had a 5 year relationship with this chick anytime someone asks me about my dating history.
Our "relationship" is made up of stories of how I asked her out a few times and how she played me because I paid attention to her..

This looks like something i've seen before. Either way, my favorite game is Resident Evil 2. I dont know why but i can literally beat the game over and over again and never get tired of it. The game is overall perfect to me.

My strongest fetish is bestiality and fuck i wish it wasnt, even just videos of animals fucking each other gets me rock hard.

I frequently jerk off to bears fucking. And my boyfriend is cool with it

ignore the bitch, i have ex's msging me just cause its christmas, leave them on seen and/or mute them.

faggot detected?

fucking loner cunt i hope you kill yourself

I'm married to my tulpa

>not a pony
>not undertale
>none of that autistic shit

i biggest secret/confession is i purposely ignore women that are really into me because im scared of the commitment and i jack it too much to porn so i know i wouldnt be able to stay hard during sex, so i skip the embarrassment that way. Also, i have had a threesome with a friend and his girlfriend multiple times, sometimes got hard, sometimes completely soft the entire time. I want a relationship and to be intimate with someone but refuse to fuck myself over with it. As to stop jacking off, i cant stop to save my life. I live to jack off to stupid shit. its not even normal videos anymore, slowly starting to venture into more gay stuff now to get my kick. Eventually i will get my shit together but right now im split between being content and motivated to change my life. Just jacked off 20 minutes ago :)

You failed because the joke was forced and wasn't subtle.

I manipulated everybody around me for so long it's become second nature. It's rare for me to ever hear "No" anymore. My ex-wife probably realized this before she left me, but I doubt it since she still tries so hard to stay in my life.
Some of my manipulations have even formed a weird form of cult where Im a sort of demigod. Because of this, I have people who thank me for things I had nothing to do with, like their boyfriends getting physically better from drug addiction. Honestly I kind of want it all to stop, but it's so deeply embedded in my friends and relationships, I wouldn't be able to without losing them all.

>pool
>christmas

You some kinda polar bear?

Indeed. He is fine with my zoo side. Wants to dabble with me.

The more I think about it, I really could go Charles Manson on people if I really wanted to. It kind of creeps me out at this point, since this has been going on for around 8 years.

same for me too, i dont know why it became such a strong fetish or how but theres something about it, probably the taboo-ness of it. its so fucking hot seeing a pussy of another animal. i honestly could die happy if i could fuck a bitch or a mare and cum inside the deepest i could possibly go

if u really manipulated everybody around you then you wouldnt of even stated that or replied tot his thread gtfo you aint even close to a sociopath.
REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Loner? I'm in a relationship, and my "family" are drug fucked fraudsters. They drained me of thousands of dollars, my time and energy, and ability to care.

You go think about how you jumped the gun, just now.

gottem. And Ive always wanted to try and get back with that girl. She was insanely hot

end your fucking life loner
REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I dont think i could ever tell anyone about it. Ive never donw anything to an animal but i have a lot of pets and I know my partner would be disgusted. Probably just gonna hold it in for the rest of my life

I've never had a girlfriend before and dread anyone asking me that question. I just make up a random name and years we been together with a easy to understand reason why we split up, but always keep it consistent. rather sound like an autist then straight up tell them that i've never had.

Honestly biggest secret is all the experiences I've had with family members.. M/23/bi.. Shit is honestly crazy. But it all turns me on. Can't really say.. Add my SC: anonguy316

Fuck, i'm sorry man. That's no way to live. I got incredibly lucky, smoked some weed once and admitted I was a zoo after a few months of joking about dog and horse cock. Showed my bf my stash of videos. He doesn't care at all.

Maybe find someone who will let you be you.

Im not a sociopath. I do it because I like to have control over my life, not people. Honestly I only said it to feel better. Ive never said it before and it honestly stresses me out. Regardless of whether anybody believes me, I just feel better saying it.

some things are best left untold, i know as humans we want to rant about shit. but beastiality is one of those topics you just dont, usually. we are in the same boat, i will take it to my grave as well. not risking anything.... now i wanna jack off to some ani pucci boi

I thought my neighbor was trying to do the running car in the closed garage suicide thing and I was just gonna watch while I waited for the bus

I once got ahold of a girls nudes that i know then posted here and then showed her the thread as a concerned friend and helped her figure out that it must have been this creepy guy who stalks her. I litereally just did it for the attention from her. Worth it. Would do again

You ever been asked out? I got asked out to lunch twice.
It only gets harder the older you get.
Pick one girl and stick with it, weave this rich backstory and say you guys did 4 or 5 years and it fucked you up for a while. That's how I'm staying alive.

Shit user i had the same question. I still dont know what she wants.
Maybe she only wants to rise her ego.

Just ignore her. Bitches like to play mind games. You guys are exes for a reason. Just let it be.
I have to remind myself this shit all the time, or I'd lose it every time my ex messaged me.

Yeah, been asked out a few times. The good thing tho is i havent been asked that question since high school, but i can see how it would be difficult. Also sounds like some good advice and i most likely will start sticking with it, thanks.

tell the gf.

>"Yo, one of your crazy cousins asked me to give her an orgasm and I fucking noped outta there. You handle it."

That really is lucky as hell. Thing is I dunno if i wanna be myself, Ive tried just not looking at porn of it but theres times where nothing else will get me off, I feel like its a problem i need to overcome. Also the fact that Im kinda furry doesn't help either, cause people often associate the two regardless. Feels nice to talk about it though

no prob, bro. Us relationship virginias gotta stick together. We're a dying breed. like 10 more years and we get wizard powers.

when I was in the death throws of my last relationship I used to expose full blooded rock hard dick and balls under bike shorts and tight pants to her sister when she was over. One night we were drunk as all fuck and we both forgot that she was staying the night with us and I lit her up in the living room and railed her within an inch of her life, shit was making noises like a wild animal and the next morning the sister comes out and says to me "I saw everything" and I replied "did you enjoy it? Maybe itll be you soon" and her face went red and she got up from the table and ran out of the room haha fuckin hell I didn't give a fuuuuurrrk

This.

Do this shit before her cousin spins some narrative making it look like you approached her. If you tell her upfront, she's more likely to believe you than if she finds out from your cousin

i like to expose myself to young girls and i do

You're just realizing that human pussy is obsolete nowadays. It's all about fortune cookie pussy... mmmmm warm like apple pie

same
its fuckin evil but the raw curious thirst in a tweens eyes is addictive

I want to fuck my cousin cause shes hot af

I also once masterbated to her pictures

Not much of a secret or confession but here you go.

>During my entire childhood and teen years in Sweden, up until about 10 years ago it was considered normal to go swim at this lake, naked.
>Pretty much everyone's house is built around this large lake and near the lake was like a hangout place after school and such.
>"Want to go for a swim?" was a spontaneous thing and no one wanted to get back to their house first to get swimwear
>So guys and girls all swam there naked and everyone was used to that anyway since their parents and their parents etc etc. used to take them there
>Even during teen years this kept going, and of course there was some messing around every now and then, and awkward moments when getting a boner seeing your crush, but it was all accepted
>It was very easy to get intimate with girls because they were not prude or scared to be or see a guy naked
>If you liked each other, whether lust or love you could simply find a private spot and do your thing
>I mean it's not like everyone was fucking there all the time, it was usually just swimming
>Of course not very safe at all, I don't think many people brought condoms when they did, let alone take precautions for STDs
>It's pretty much how everyone experienced their first sexual acts, including me.
>Nowadays it's considered unsafe to swim naked there and people take over American culture much more so I think that's why people are much more prude.

i have a friend that dates his hot cousin, but i dont blame him. if that was my cousin i would do the same exact thing! blackmail her and fuck her hard

Had sex with my sis at a Christmas party today, few hours ago. She was passed out. I started just fapping with her underwear but was drunk enough to just do it. I still dont regret it. Maybe that comes in the morning...

did you ever swim deep underwater to jack off and cum so no one would know when you saw your crush?

If she asks fast enough, the girl won't have enough time to come up with a lie.

It means there's a piece of her that still wishes things were like old times. It's not good or bad, just something humans do.

Why would there be any regret? You did the right thing user, maybe the only regret you should have is cumming deep in her pussy. If anything, if she brings it up just fuck her again. And if she wants to tell anyone just rape her to let her know shes down the rabbit hole and she is your sex slave.

Not really, I would usually stay under water and hopefully lose the boner so she wouldn't see. Can't say I've never secretly fapped when seeing my crush though.

But not cum, it's not that easy under water.

did you keep them?

hope your drunk pull-out shit is good.

was it possible to have goggles, go underwater, and sneakily swim over and just look at their asses?? damn, i wish i grew up with sweden.

The underwear? No, should have though. And yeah my pull out game isn't weak

Yeah it was! Water was pretty clear. But you would see their ass, pussy, tits etc. out of the water plenty of times as well.

I mean it's not like you could stare at them for too long, but girls weren't shy about it or anything.

Good idea the problem is that she a good Christian girl

man, what a shame, coulda shared em with us

hope it's good under the influence

Dam thats smart usually i just strut my cock at her

Did you cum inside?

Don't ignore or supress who you are. It will just create problems.

I'm a pedophile and I hate myself for it.

Lol well then

you monster....

Sup Forums used to be the real representation of the internet. I dont know what happened or what went wrong. Now it's different, and Reddit is assumed to be the front page of the internet =(

Hell no. Wasn't leaving evidence

Later im gonna go fantasize about my hot cousin

Maybe he lives near or south of the equator.

those countries don't have internet

I put the milk first, why? I will know if I ran out of milk before putting any cereal

when id get blackout drunk id abuse my ex gf. Hit strangle then fuck her while degrading her...only beer nowadays

i discovered that im really turned on by girls wearing high heels and sucking dick when i was like 16 or 17. From then on all my porn had to include high heels, the whorier the better. by the time i was 20 i started fantasizing about wearing them myself but discarded the fantasy as a misunderstanding of my head getting horny, also started getting hotter when the girl was also wearing stockings. By the time i was 25 i was already fapping to the thought of me wearing both heels and stockings and being forced to suck a dick. now I own a couple pairs of stockings and one pair of low heel shoes (the only ones i could find on my size in a walmart) and have worn them to suck dick behind my wife's back. hopefully she never finds out and i get to keep on doing it every couple months as im doing it right now.

pic related, i want to wear those while sucking a dick someday

do you tear off pieces of toilet paper to make sure you have enough before you shit as well?