Okay Sup Forums, I need money...

okay Sup Forums, I need money. What are some small crimes I could commit that if I got caught for would only result in me serving a small amount of time in jail? I consider myself to be a very cautious person and I believe I could execute them out well over a period of time. Ideas? also it would be much appreciated for helping me out.

Littering

Try getting a job. If it doesn't work, go to your local store and steal some video games (preferably the triple AAA games/brand new ones. Sell them on Craigslist for $10 to $20 less than the original price for quick cash.

usually, at least at gamestop, the newer / more valuable games on display are just empty cases to prevent shoplifting.

I heard only 1 in 6 bank robbers actually get caught. Most people don't stop at just one robbery, though, resulting in a high amount of robbers being caught overall.

crimes take advantage of other people, innocent people. why would you want to hurt others, who have done nothing to you?

Unarmed robbery

yeah, walmart is pretty good though.
The older games are usually in a big pile but if literally ask someone to open the glass doors for the newer games you could do this:
>ask them to open glass doors
>get the most popular games
>ask them if you could pay at the front since you need to "get groceries"
>if they say yes,
>proceed to steal them somewhere.

Steal ftom wallmart 2 town over not at the one you go to day to day. Also about the asking part dress like a cuck

I got you op.

If you go to this place called a job and work for an extended period of time, they will give you money for your time.

Keep this on the down low though. We can't have people find out.

Do the TPB thing, steal change

Stealing grills from people's front porch

Oh definitely, it becomes an addiction. I don't ever see myself getting to that point though, considering I have a good amount of self control. as well as I would never commit any crime so drastic.

Not necessarily, it just depends on what crime you're committing. I'm talking about more petty crimes, like siphoning gas or something. and I hate to sound edgy, but I'm sure you realize most people aren't innocent and commit many crimes of their own. I don't have any psychopathic tendencies and I wouldn't say that I lack empathy or anything, most I can say is that my moral compass is a little bit off. But I could never bring myself to directly hurt anyone. I'm simply looking to make a decent amount of cash over a long period of time.

I've heard there is some money in loitering and tax evasion but im white so those are the only crimes i know about.

The shit apple don't fall far from the shit tree, Ricky!

sorry, but what you're doing is making excuses for hurting people.

Steal carts and fix them, then sell to other retail store

Or, you could get a job, keep your life options open, and not win a goddamn darwin award, you drooling moron.

Nothing you just said it's stupid as fuck. You have no experience with crime and will fuck it up.

TPB reference? My man!

steal some copper or electronic. Beyond that, committing a crime is not worth it, unless it generates enough cash for the rest of your life. Go big or go home faggot.

>electronics store
>buy something cheap that comes in a box
>empty box and fill with expensive stuff
>leave

>I need money
blowjobs are always profitable. Or you could just get a job and stop being a degenerate.

>Beyond that, committing a crime is not worth it, unless it generates enough cash for the rest of your life.
Agreed. Now what is a good low-risk (and lucrative) crime that's good for an older white guy with absolutely no criminal record?

this is now a TPB thread

getting a job isn't as easy as it sounds... Trying though, is the best option. Only time you should resort to stealing or other crimes is when you dangerously broke (like, homeless and not enough money to even buy food broke).