Hello b

hello b
it's been a while
make me say stuff

4 proof
vocaroo.com/i/s1khRT2adsE3

Other urls found in this thread:

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twitter.com/NSFWRedditVideo

Startin' off easy:

"He slams his fists against the posts,
But still insists he sees the ghosts. Also fuck you Dan, you can go the fuck home."

vocaroo.com/i/s1fT7yBNxuza

"Woah! Settle down there, Beavis."

Hank Hill would be proud
vocaroo.com/i/s0qVq3bUzFiZ

Nice. Thanks, user.

Here's another:

"Explain it to me shitlord! Explain this shit then! I'm waitin'! I'll stand here all day, cock in hand, waitin' for you to explain to me how we STILL don't have affordable abortion machines on every corner. I don't fucking get it. You Trump supporters are all Nazis. I'm literally shaking right now."

"arugula quit smoking all the pasta also asahd, I so proud of you"

...

welcy welcy chocly melky

call me house cat
vocaroo.com/i/s0m4dtkW2AG7

vocaroo.com/i/s1oMN0ExxJlM

vocaroo.com/i/s040vuw15uHD

kekd, tenku OP

Thanks beter, made me lol

pls feed me more lines 2 read

"WE WUZ KANG AN' SHIT NIGGA"

"Was I sleeping while the others suffered? Am I sleeping now? Tomorrow, when I wake, or think I do, what shall I say of today? That, with my friend Estragon, at this place until the fall of night, I waited for Godot?"

vocaroo.com/i/s1G4gChgy1ic

vocaroo.com/i/s0ZkN5RCHyuo

In under 5 seconds say the following three times: Icky, picky, Nickey, tricky, Mickey.

"HI BILLY MAYS HERE WITH HOLY FUCK LOOK AT THAT GUY JACK OFF!

WITH HOLY FUCK LOOK AT THAT GUY JACK OFF, THERE ARE NO MORE MOMENTS OF NOT LOOKING AT THAT GUY JACK OFF.

HOLY FUCK LOOK AT THAT GUY JACK OFF IS GREAT FOR PARTIES, WEDDINGS, TAKE IT TO THE OFFICE AND EVEN ON THE AIRPLANE.

HOLY FUCK LOOK AT THAT GUY JACK OFF COMES AT A RETAIL PRICE OF NINETEEN NINETY NINE

BUT

IF YOU ORDER NOW WE'LL THROW IN A SHIT IN MY ASS AND TWO FUCK ME SIDEWAYS THAT DOG'S BALLS ARE HUGE

like this dad?
vocaroo.com/i/s0do7iwglfpV

vocaroo.com/i/s1KAOoOgKf2K

With a special touch :)

No, in the exact order I wrote them, then repeat.

I think I got it
vocaroo.com/i/s0Gip6U6tZYL

Good dog. You may touch yourself one time.

holy shit 10/10 kekd my face off

Requesting:
"W-What's happening? How is he over loading our detectors? This machine was designed to test autism levels of entire worlds, you imbecile! Autism this powerful can't possibly come from a single user. These readings are off the charts...And now the damn meter has broken! This is unfathomable! What the hell is he? WHAT ARE YOU? You-You monster! You have to die! You're far too dangerous to let live!"

a swedish dog says "bjork"
a finnish dog says "jeyoark"
a southern dog says "wuuf"
a northern dog says nothing, since dogs dont live up north
except in the tetons.
Ya welcy!!! glad u laughed : )

I'm a proud ethnic Kekistani. For centuries my people bled under Normie oppression. But no more. We have suffered enough under your Social Media Tyranny. It is time to strike back. I hereby declare a meme jihad on all Normies. Normies, GET OUT!

vocaroo.com/i/s0oxnQetKOdR

You are opressing me because of my Kekistani heritage, aren’t you? Just because my brain was stricken by the Giza Mass Autism Array at the end of the Finno-Korean Hyperwar, you think it’s ok? Think again. Pepe and The God-Emperor will vanquish you. All shall Praise Kek.you are the embodiment of everything I hate. I am readying my advanced Pepe Meme Bots and readying Kek spells with my autistic brain. My intense memory and autism will see you destroyed. I am also notifying Mike “The Electric Fence” Pence about you. Get out Normie. I have thousands of years experience as the High Meme Dragon of Kekistan. I have the highest level of Autism possible, and I have downloaded Reddit and Sup Forums into my brain. My Autist brain can easily crush your weeaboo brain with my Keks.

>Kekistani
KYS

vocaroo.com/i/s1wd4OhtjvX4

The pizza bagel song except instead of 'pizza' say 'penis':

>penis in the morning
>penis in the evening
>penis at suppertime
>when you've got penis on a a bagel
>you can eat penis anytime

Kek'd hard

I need you to immortalize my experience tonight for the sake of saving mankind from making my mistakes.

So I decided to buy myself a Tenga Flip Zero at the tune of 64 dollarydoos for myself this Christmas off of Amazon. I never used one before but my expectations were fairly low since my sensitivity has been reduced to almost nil since I used to beat my dick several times a day back in high school. I was even able to go 14 times in around 6 hours. It was actually rather damaging to my attendance record but that isn't the point to this story. See during Christmas time, I'm with my Mom and Dad separately due to the fact that they never married. I was over at my Dad's when I got the thing and it was magnificent. It is honestly the best 64 bucks ever spent in my life. I could never bring myself to pull out before finishing because of how great it felt. Which is why I would wash it every time in the bathroom sink. I never felt any sort of guilt over washing the cum out in that sink since it's a nasty fucking bathroom anyway. After a week I went to my Mom's house. She moved in with some guy and his house is pretty clean so I didn't want to stain their sinks with my sperm. Plus I'm a lazy fuck. So we get to tonight, after about 4 days of shooting my load into this onahole without cleaning it out. Everyone's asleep right now, so I figured I'd get some fapping in. Now, there are two facts to bring up. First, this puppy has a plastic case for when it's not in use. Second, something that hadn't come to mind since I'm retarded, is that sperm is organic matter. And thus, can expire. I nearly vomited just from opening the case alone. 4 day old rancid spunk hit my face like a goddamn truck. I immediately went into the kitchen and cleaned that motherfucker out, even going as far as to let it air out unlike all the other times.
Moral of the story is to clean your onahole out EVERY FUCKING TIME.

vocaroo.com/i/s0HRJgfQZbjd

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I suck, but that's just entertaining to say.

"I’m a nigger from mars with rocket launchers biatch!"

vocaroo.com/i/s0ieR4OgjqmI

>vocaroo.com/i/s1IqrIjlqgu1
LMAO

Please say with a Jewish accent "Hello goyim - I mean fellow whites. As a WHITE man, I say we should let all white people die out. Except in Israel; Israel has a right to exist."

fuck the welfare niggers that dont work and the mexicans that took our jobs

vocaroo.com/i/s0KnuiyT5BTR

I would buy this album. You are doings the work of gods.

vocaroo.com/i/s0iEanqW1U3Y

Not OP and not as a Jewish "man".

I cannot jew for my life
im too white to jew
Pakistan for life
vocaroo.com/i/s0IkQjcUKinQ

>vocaroo.com/i/s0ieR4OgjqmI
Is it me or does this app bass boost and distort me a bit?

hard to tell on the bass, but the guitar sounded distorted.

odd
usually comes clean on my albums

oh whale

any more request?

Thank you but don't bullshit me.
There's no possible way anyone could go 40 times in an hour and if you continue to make such allegations, I will have to request some proof or else you are a giant pussy.
I love you but you seriously can't just talk all that shit when we both know you couldn't ever go that much for so short a time in even your wildest dreams.

Kind user, would you please use the same "female" voice again and say:
"Oh that's quite expensive, Goy. It's going to cost you six hundred dollars. Do you have that much, or do I need to extend you a line of high interest credit?"
"Oh? That's sweet dear, what is it you do for a living?"
"I will glady accept your money, Goy!"

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Like this? vocaroo.com/i/s1zLMC89Ugjl

vocaroo.com/i/s1AFPxhVLBBp

Yes, thank you!

Should probably listen to

i go sleep

night night

Goodbye forever user.

"Suck my weed lovin ass you Iowa cornfuckers, cus colorado is the best state"

Do it op

Shit I'm too late

"Hey Ronald, where's my Mulan Szechuan Mcnugget sauce you clown? You're going to give me some of that Szechuan sauce you've got hidden in the back, or I will leap over this counter and find it myself! Y-Y-You slapped me? You can't slap me! I am the customer- Hey get back here and fight me like a man for that McNugget sauce you coward!"

Really now? You think Alex Jone's artificial nutbladder boosters could ever level your ass up enough to reach me when I was in my prime? Let me tell you something pal, I don't know your name. You have that point, I admit. But I do, however, know YOU. I know your kind. Too weak to build up your cock's strength with nothing but shear, human spirit so you resort to the equivalent of genital steroids just to fill the void in your soul. YOU are the weak shit son and while you may not believe it, I will prove to you just how much I love you in spite of all that. I may not have the vitality of my younger years but with Zordon as my witness, the fury of my mighty cock shall be known to all once more. Just as it will be known to you, in hopes that you REPENT for your sins.
So prepare yourself, my friend, for the reckoning that is coming for you.
Because I assure you that I will be doing the same.

So what's the deal with weed in Colorado? Anyone can just come buy a small amount of weed and smoke it in their hotel room, or how does that weed tourism work?