ITT: how you lost your virginity

ITT: how you lost your virginity

by having intercourse with the opposite sex

My mom took it when I was 13. She fucked me in the ass with her strapon.

Greentext? Tho I’m almost afraid to ask lol

A girl tripped over and landed on my dick

give me a bit, I'll need to get drunk first

looks like we've got ourselves a comedian. got anymore jokes you'd like to share with us boy?

I didn't.

nice dubs

>15 yo
>being horny af
>having jerked off twice on the morning
>mom's at work until 9PM
>chatting with these girl I know she likes me
>ask her to come to my house
>she accepts
>she arrives
>i was preparing some excuses in case she refused in the end
>she did not
>broke my bed support and finished on the couch.

>8th grade
>finally at that point where im more teen than boy
>through 7th grade girls didnt really pay attention to me
>thanks to summer girls forget about all the stupid shit from earlier years and see you as a somewhat new person if you look different
>no girls are outright hitting on me, but if I flirt iwth some they flirt back
>there's one girl named jessica i had my heart set on since 5th grade
>other people thought she was into me even back then but it never really panned out.
>we spend the first semester flirting around but im too nervous to make a move
>finally Angelina starts inviting everyone to her party
>this has been a tradition since 6th grade, and each year it got a little better
>little did i know this would be my last year invited, but more on that later
>Its not an open invite sort of thing. Angelina wasn't 'popular' this wasnt like one of those movies, but she was rich so even if you werent into her the parties were high end enough that you really wanted to go
>she had two parties a year, once right before christmas, and one right before summer (her birthday)
>the christmas party would be at a hotel where they'd rent out a hall and decorate it lavishly
>its probably cheaper than i remember but in middle school seemed like a big deal
>angelina and I weren't really friends, but we hung out a lot on the playground back in 4th grade so she felt obligated to invite me i guess
>there was about 2000 students in our class alone, and she was only able to invite 50
>i was stoked when i got my invite again cuz i wasnt sure where i stood with her (friend wise)
>unfortunately jessica did not get an invite cuz jessica and angelina didn't know each other
>i spent the next few weeks begging angelina to let me have a plus one
>she said she'd consider it but i had to d oher homework until the new year
>december had virtually no homework except math so i made the deal. it was the same as in my class, so i just had to copy my existing homework.

I lost it when I was 15 or 16 in HS to my then GF.
Nothing all that exciting, just awkward adolescent pokin'.

Quadruple dubs

so answer the question

>three days before the party i ask if I can get that invite for jessica
>angelina is embarassed, she admits that she can't actually get me another invite and had assumed that someone else would cancel on the party thus allowing her to invite jessica
>im freaking out cuz ive been doing extra math homework for weeks
>she threatens to take away my invite as well, so i shut my mouth cuz id rather go to the party alone than not at all
>a few days later i show up to the party in my cheap little suit
>when i get there most of the other people are there
>i go to say hi to Angelina nad give her a christmas gift (i was the only one who showed up with one it was embarassing)
>but when i find her shes not alone.
>SHE BROUGHT JESSICA!
>angelina says she and jessica started hanging out cuz angelina wanted help with math homework and jessica offered to help her
>they became fast friends and she kicked out 'daniel' in order to let her come
>i was estatic but a little nervous now, daniel wasn't like some archetypal bully but he always me nervous
>talking angry school shooter type, another kid only invited cuz angelina used to play with him on the playground years before she even met me
>i try to let it out of my mind and spend most of the night talking to jessica, getting her drink, getting her food
>too nervous to ask her to dance but she finalyl asks me to dance.
>im freaking out
>at that age any contact with her would give me a boner, and she kept trying to push closer so i was worried she could feel it
>after dancing a few times she starts to look bored, almost sad
>we sit down and watch other people dance for awhile
>its a really awkward silence
>i finally ask her if she wants to dance again
>Shes all excited
>we get up there and she immediately pulls me close
>after one song she rolls her eyes and pulls my hands down her waist and towards her ass
>im kinda freaking out, i must've looked retarded but she looked so confident

I lost mine on a pullout bed...the irony.

Quaddubs holy shit

Fell onto a cucumber one day

Like three months ago in a dorm room. It was fine I guess.

>be 16
>met fucktard and his gf
>gf breaks up with him
>rebound.jpg
>ask if she wants to hang
>”wanna have sex?”
>”sure”
>ask stepdad to drive me over to her place
>told him to hang around the area since this won’t take long
>penetrate her and last way too long
>decide to try everything I learned in porn
>cowgirl jackhammer time
>she cums all over my dick
>still can’t get off
>went home and blew the biggest load of my life while enjoying the sweet smells of vagoo on my meat whistle

Continue

>my dick was diamonds the entire time
>then sudden;y she rubbed right up against it
>she clearly knows what shes doing, holy crap she wnats the D
>i was freaking out, i wasn't even ready for sex yet, we havent even kissed or been on an official date
>after a few more songs of her doing this and me essentially just standing there she gets looking bored again, the nsad again
>she goes to sit down again
>i sit down, not sure what i did wrong, she begins to tear up
>'d-did i do something wrong?'
>Jessica: i thought you liked me but you wont even do anything unless i make you... boys are supposed to like me...
>'i like you'
>we both turn around
>its ed, some half latino half chamorro kid in our class
>im freaking out, hes handsome af, even i kinda wanna do him tbh
>jessica brushes him off and scoots closer to me
>my heart slows down a bit, shes in to me and only me it seems
>ed apologizes for interrupting and leaves
>i finally ask her if she wants to dance again
>yes, just dont be a pussy
>im kinda shocked, i never expected her to say things like this
>we get on the dance floor and i ask if she ever talked to ed before
>she admits they kinda dated before
>ui was surprised id known her for 3 years and hadnt really heard of this
>she explained that her parents dont let her 'date' until next year so she had to keep it on the down low
>suddenly Ed appears again, on the dance floor
>he wraps his hands around her waist, i can feel them overlapping my hands.
>hes dancing iwth her from behind
>im dancing with her from the front
>she laughs and tells him to get out of here
>he says 'come on, its an oreo (he and I are somewhat dark skinned and jessica is pure white)
>she laughs and says fine
>im standing there awkwardly swaying but this guy actually knows how to dance
>hes basically artistically dry humping her ass and shes no longer moving the way i move
>shes moving the way he moves
>i tell him he should go, Jessica's here with me

The have the grammar of an autistic Jewish chinaman

Pulled a massive icicle from the barn eave. Running to the house to show my family. Slipped while crossing driveway. Fell and huge icicle penetrated my anus.

>she is sucking traps dick
>you can clearly see another pair of boobs

>my childhood crush but was lesbian
>she had a bad breakup and decided to try out dudes
>luckyme.jpg
>lost my virginity to her, shit was cash
>thought we were in a relationship was super stoked and can't remember ever being as happy, couldn't stop smiling when she would text etc
>TFW she dumped me via text, I lost my shit and ended up in the back of a police car and homeless

Craigslist whore. In my car, for $60. It. Was. Awful. I couldn't even cum.

What did he/she look like?

How old are you?

>'we never agreed on that!' jessica said, suddenly mad
>i try to tighten my grip on her to get her to move with my hips, but she pushes me away
>I explain how I worked so hard to get her invited to this thing
>she gets mad at me asking what shes tlaking about
>i explain the whole homework situation with angelina nad how she faked needing help afterwards to become friends with jessica for me
>Jessica smiles thnking its sweet
>Ed: dude, thats stalker shit!
>me: w-what?
>ed: you've been stalking her for years even when we were dating and you went through all that just to makme it seem like you were in the same place together
>me: n-no i wanted to invite you but i thought i couldn't
>jessica is suddenly not as flattered.
>i reach for her but she steps back, into EDs arms.
>he smiles slyly at me.
>at this point a lot of people have stopped to watch what was going on
>he points down at my crotch
>'anons got a boner'
>everyone laughs
>im horrified and run out into the hall.
>i see the door of the hotel and think of making a run for it, i can get on the Navy bus and get back to base in an hour if i remembered to bring my military ID
>Angelina suddenly rushes out and meets me in the hallway
>she asks if everything is okay
>i explain what happened, and she laughs too
>i feel awful
>she puts her hand on my shoulder and tells me its okay
>she offers to get me home via taxi
>i cant find my ID so even with a taxi i can't get back on base
>she says she'll come with me and use her ID
>she wants to leave her own party to make sure i get home
>i smile and agree

And how many track marks did she have on her arms/body?

>be 13
>dad deploys to Iraq
>I miss him all the time, his unit is always on he news taking casualties
>sleep in mom's bed occasionally
>one night she was really drunk
>she's 6'1 and lifts competitively
>I'm asleep in her bed and she comes and turns me onto my front
>she ties my hands to the frame, takes off my pajamas and rubs something cold onto my anus
>she says "I love you son"
>now fully awake as she pushes her dildo into me
>starts off gentle, but gets harder as I loosen up
>hits my prostate and I start crying
>I start getting hard and semen starts to drip from my dick
>after 15 minutes she unties me and cuddles me until I fall asleep

...

Robin

>Be me, 19, at college.
>Friday night, bongloaded, doing laundry.
>Housemate comes in, "user - Girlanon's at the bar being pestered!"
>Wut? 6/10 friend a few years older, but not my monkey.
>"She wants out!"
>Fuuuu... Laundry's dry enough. Pack it up, go white knight mode.
>Arrive at bar. ShesAloneAtTheBar.jpg WTF?
>Sidle up, talk.
>"Wanna go home user, but too drunk."
>Gives me keys, I'll drive. ...
>Deserted road, find myself in oncoming lane.
>"Shit shit shit - keep awake!" Just a few blocks to go.
>She doesn't notice.
>Help her up to apt.
>She goes to bathroom, comes out in nightie, goes to bed.
>"I'll leave room for you, user." passes out.
>All my underware's in the laundry pile.
>Join her wearing T shirt.
>Sleep.
>Wake later, not so stoned, now imagining possibilites.
>She stirs.
>"You awake? Are we gonna sleep all night?"
>She giggles, rolls over to me.
>Dunno how this came, out, but asked, "Birth control?"
>"Pill."
cont...

sounds like some pedo shit

Nonfactual and homosexual

Robin
...cont:
>Autopilot - I have no idea what's going on, but my hand does.
>Reach out, slide nightie up, feeling smooth leg - wowsoft!
>Pass over the bush, come back and explore for a while.
>She gently wraps her hand around my confused but happy cock.
>Never been touched before - the feeling is total surpise.
>I feel the wet, know enough to play, but am not familiar enough to be sure it's right.
>She coaxes me on top while spreading her legs, reaches down and guides my cock to her opening with her hand.
>feelsgoodman
>Going slow, she's liking it.
>That's making me like it even more.
>Trying to absorb all the sensations.
>I always liked how girls looked, now I know I like the feel.
>Want it all the time.
>I'm guessing she's getting there.
>Feel the deep wave building in me. Can't stop it.
>"I'm coming, Babe."
>"Do it."
>Go atavistic - Hug her hard, rapidly pound like a piston, can't help it.
>Explode, HolyCow_I_Get_It!
>Spent, start to pull out.
>"Leave it in, user!"
>Wu? Okay. Starts going soft, no choice - it worms out.
>It's all good. All good.
>We get up, She takes off nightie.
>Glad that wasn't earlier - Sloppy baggies for tits.
>Get dressed, she drives me home.
>Be me, pondering what just happened. I'm a man!

That's just plain silly.

>we get into the cab
>shes rubbing my shoulder most of the way there, its a long drive from Tumon down to the navy base, and she lives on the anderson base in the opposite direction so i know something isn't 'normal' here
>over the course of the ride we get closer and closer, and end up moving ot the middle seat in the back and wrapping my arm around her
>We talk about how much we miss each other nad how much things have changed
>she admits she always liked me, but she thought it was just a kids crush
>when we get past the gate i think about what happened with jessica and i dont want this to happen again.
>i decide to makme a move, i lean in and kiss her
>shes shocked, but then she returns the kiss to me
>we spend the next 15 minutes going from tiny pecks on the lip to awkward mouthfuls of tongue
>the driver in the front chuckled once, condescendingly but we ignored him
>we finally arrive at my place
>this is my chance!

>I invite her in
>she looks at me
>'what for?' she asks
>'to... you know'
>she loses her smile
>'what?'
>'i mean... we don't have to... i just thought'
>shes offended
>im scared and just say sorry and get out of the car
>she gets out to
>she comes up behind me and pulls me back asking what i was tlaking about
>'y-you know...'
>she slaps me
>this is why we can't be friends you think all girls are whores
>allofmywhat
>she gets back in the car and drives off
>i go inside
>dad is there
>i start crying
>he holds me tight
> i feel so safe in his arms as he tells me what a big man im becoming
>why cant it feel this way when women hold you?
>in my fathers arms theres no games, no tricks, he just loves me and wants me to feel better
>'i thought i was going to lose my virginity tonight'
>he laughs and flicks my boner through my pants
>'not too late for that' he says
>im freaking out now
>somethings not right here
>i get up off my dads lap, i realize im too old for this
>i say i need to go to bed
>he follows me right to my room and i try to lock the door on him
>without the tears in my eyes i get a better look at him
>hes clearly been drinking
>he tells me im so pretty like my mom
>tells me that he really misses her
>i try to hold the door shut but im too weak
>he gets in
>that night he made me take his dick
>it hurt so much, i was bleeding afterb ut he wouldnt take me to the doctor
>instead he just kept me out of school for a week while it healed and all the students thought i had comitted suicide from embarassment at the party

and that kids is the story of how i lost my virginity

8th Grade

Militarty Base

What?

with a rim job :/

military families live on base. even Guantanamo allowed families at one point (and yes i did live there too) do civilians not know this?

monkaS

Some apparently don't.
Ignorance is rampant.

plot twist

tenouttaten

where does the navy base come from all of the sudden?

>be mardi gras 2002
>be 19 (late I know fuck off), too young to buy alcohol
>find a QT redhead on HotorNot who is going to same uni, message her to meet up
>missed connections a couple of times, but end up at her place drinking watching Knight's Tale on Mardi Gras
>drink too much to walk home, she has me sleep with her on her paper-thin futon
>goodbyespine.png
>go to sleep making out
>wake up in the morning, get frisky
>rides me like a cowgirl, bareback, has incredible muscle control from being on the college track team
>squeezes my cubes right as I nut
>pleasure is a brief distraction from the agonizing pain in my lower back caused by her cheap fucking futon.

Honestly not as good as I'd expected, but still fun times. I never did get the blowie she promised me.

It took an unexpected turn to the gay at the end.

>sleeping @my best Friend (female) i was 18 and she 17
>because her Parents went on Holidays and she is Scared being alone
>looking tv in her bed as Always
>I try to sleep
>only underwear ( was normal for US to sleep together in underwear bc best Friends but Nothing Happened in the past
>i closed my eyes to sleep
>she started Sitting on me and Rubbing her pussy on my dick but Underwear on ans she Kissed my body
>it was very warm and wet
>i opened my eyes and then she asked if we should have sex ( Both Virgins)
> Took so much Time to put on the Condom ( she said she bought them a day Ago)
>fucked like 1-2 Hours
>very Nice , she Fell in Love with me
>her Body is Very hot , but Face normal , Long blond Hair

>that Happened 1 year ago
> Had so much sex With her , 1 year Every week
>we became a Couple
>but Never Had Sex this good Again.. my 1. Time was the best sex i Had

>i Broke Up with her 1 Month ago, i Wish i didn‘t :(

...

>Be me 17 Year Old High School Senior All American Lacrosse Player and Star Football Player
>I got kicked out of private school my junior year and have to go to public high school
>Private school was all boys so I never really had a chance to talk to girls except apps like tinder and hot or not.
>Go to Public school in nice area on the East Coast
>Live with Grandparents in their nice ass house because parents don't wanna deal with me
>Show up to football first day of summer practice >Beat out starting senior in my position for the starting spot
>School is a big sports school
>Flash forward homecoming game
>We win
>Classmates rush field
>Everyone is celebrating
>This point I barely know people only 5th week at new school
>Teammates tell me to come to their house before party for a pregame
>Go to pregame
>Hot girls everywhere
>Start talking a girl named Madison
>even to me it obvious that she wants dick
>Go to party get drunk and have fun, but no sex
>Ask Teammates about Madison
>They say she is insane, but great in bed
>One day after practice on friday she texts me
>asks me to come over and "hang out"
>I have prepared myself for this moment
>Drive over to her house
>Holy shit it is huge what the fuck is this
>Knock on these giant steel doors
>She opens the door dressed in nothing but a tshirt and underwear
>Immediately start making out with her
>She than decides that we will do it in her parents bed
>she has major daddy issues
>We start going further and undressing eachother >I pull out condom she says we don't need it
>Fuck it I'm going in raw
>I start penetrating her
>It hurts her at first
>We tried using spit as lube but didn't work
>we go down stairs and look for stuff that could be lube.
>Find coco butter
>Put it in the microwave
>Shit feels so good on my dick
>Slide into her
>Start actually having sex
>Hour later she is getting sore
>I haven't cum
>she is confused
>we have to stop because she is sore
>she starts crying
>I leave

1 year every week i wish i had that much time in my life

I lost my virginity in the woods beside my high school when I was 15 to a pretty small goth girl. Good times.

You sound like an idiot

Get in a Relationship with a Girl who Really enjoys sex and you could easily fuck more often then i did my friend :)

What's the deal with all those caps

Why?

Boned my first under a blanket on her parents couch while her parents were in the other room.
I am glad I ruined her and made her into the slut she is now.

10/10 user, you got me

Met a girl a few weeks before new years. New years eve she told her mom she was staying at her friends for the night but we really went to my friends party. !0 minutes after midnight we went into friends spare bedroom and I ate the puss for maybe 20 minutes then we fucked a few times and just crashed in the room. Woke up in the morning and fucked again then I took her home.

Lrn2wright fagit

I don´t

Are we just ignoring the fact that the guy in OP's pic has tits?

Ribs moron

You got rid of a good thing, please tell me why you broke it off with her? Also I'm just bitter jealous and alone so excuse my tone.

i fell for the trap meme, and ended up meeting a guy in a hotel room to fuck me in the ass.

i lived on a navy base in guam. it wasn't really pertinent information when i started the story, but it explains why i had to take a cab home with someone else. you cant get on base without someone having their ID

My uncle John came over for thanksgiving

ITT: Things that didn't happen.

Underrated post

>i had sex with a girl

ITT: Things that didn't happen.

A school in Guam with 2000+ kids in a single class?

I was quite old, at 25.
I had the opportunity many times before, even before 16 which is the legal age but I was quite young for most of them and so it never happened.

Basically I've had a good friend for most of my life, which is a girl. We have some feelings for eachother, which are mostly lust feelings but the lines get blurred sometimes.

When we were 14 or so she was my first kiss, not long after I had seen her tits which she wasn't shy to show me at all. At 16 she jerked me off in her bedroom on her birthday itself, and we did some feeling around, fingered her and this went on for many years.

We were pretty much boyfriend and girlfriend all this time, and we did everything but actual sex. Not just sex, we'd hang out and she's very cuddly so all of that as well.

Then at 25, she had a boyfriend for 2 years so we didn't do much at all. They broke up so she got kicked out of the house pretty much, and came to my doorstep.

Her parents asked her to come live with them, but she preferred to stay with me if possible.
Sure, I mean I lived on my own and lead a pretty good life so far so it took some time to get used to it.

After a while I really loved having a girl around the house, just the smells etc. and she felt really at home and her smile came back (she was really devastated over the breakup)

Then after some time, we're pretty much boyfriend and girlfriend again. She sleeps with me in my bed, we're getting horny again and she gives me a blowjob.

Tell her to stop, she knows I'm a virgin.
She knows exactly what I want and climbs on top, rides my dick like a pro and I cum within minutes.

It only took a couple of times before I got her pregnant and now we have 2 daughters and are married.

It never happened because I didn't meet many girls after school and stuff when I was young btw*

i dunno if having a blowjob counts?

>I got her pregnant
I... don't know what to say. I'm so sorry, user.

be 21y old virgin

failed attempt at gf turns into friendzone

get real close and always playful

one time we make out and she slides down on top of my dick. Cum instantly whilst she is still sitting stil. Mfw first time sex is ruined orgam. She moves up, it's flacid and empty and drops out.

A hooker. experience was overall was a 7 out of 10. would do it again.

I don’t know .. i felt like i deserve someone even hotter, because other girls always said you could have a better girl ...

But now I rlly regret it so much I swear I‘ll never get a awesome girl like her again

We planned our future , everything we had our whole future in plan and she wanted sex every time and she was so awesome

.. but I broke up and now I regret it but she don’t want me back

She called me for 2 weeks all day like 100-500 x per day and cried and wrote so many massages

.. then she started to cut herself , whole upper body even her tits and her arm ..

She is in psychiatry now because of heavy depression

And I feel so bad for her because I said everyday that I will never leave her and always make her happy
.. but I didn‘t

I’ll never be happy again I swear I hope god forgives me and someday maybe I can make her happy again .. or somebody else

I had 1x sex since that happened with another girl and it was horrible It took me so long to get a boner ..

Pls guys love your girls . And don’t let any other girls talk you into breaking up with your girl .

Fucking logged

It's not too bad when you have a good foundation in a relationship, especially when you've known each other for so long!

>be me 19 year old pathetic virgin
>meet 15 year old slut
>be friends with her for a while
>start messing around
>she gave me my first blowy joey in my car and i fingered her
>first time i ever touched pussy
>couple weeks later i fucked her in her room while her mom was on the other side of a paper thin wall
>was FWB with her on and off for half a year
>fucked her probably 50 times over that time period
>she was a huge slut and let me do whatever the fuck i wanted with her
>got to do all the kinky porn shit i wanted to do with a girl, like cum in face and what not

as a side note, the age of consent is 16 where i live, so its not THAT bad

Same here
Little hmong hooker I bought
No regerts

>Be me 16yo
>A party where i only like know half of everyone here
>Start chatting up this girl with braces. 6/10
>She is 16 as well, and knows one of the hosts
>Within minutes we start french kissing like mad
>There are people in every room, except one
>Ohshit.jpg
>Guide her out to the bathroom
>We both undress, i put on a condom and we start fucking.
>After doing various positions i get her on top to catch my breath
>mfw this bitch is expecting me to do the work with her on top.
>I here rattling at the lock, and knocking on the door
>Some dude outside the door starts yelling
>"who is fucking in my bathroom"
>We both begin to observe the door, and start fucking "faster"
>I finish in the condom, and toss it out quickly.
>We get clothed and get out of there.

>A week later i find out she wasn't actually 16. but 13
>she also took a "regret" pill, because the condom broke
>she also want to fuck again but this time with BDSM
>Hell Nah.wav

Well, best of luck living with that regret bud

I was five and he was six
We rode on horses made of sticks
He wore black and I wore white
He would always win the fight

>5th grade
>recess
>girl from my class I never even spoke to drags me off to this secluded bushy area in the back of the school
>takes off her shorts and underwear
>makes me pull my pants down
>strokes my dick until it's diamonds then gets on top of me
>humps me for like 30 seconds, I think I cum inside of her
>she puts her clothes back on and leaves
>I wasn't even sure what happened until like a year later

>Dating Kristin, high school classmate from Wheaton. Cute, blonde cheerleader.
>Gets us matching purity rings.
>Okay.
>Go to party. She gives me a hard time about something stupid. Leaves with friend.
>Head downstairs with teammates. Have my first beer. Then second.
>Gf Kristen's cheer teammate sends her cousin, little Italian hottie from rival hs over.
>Head out to gazebo. Start to make out. Figure it's not cheating, etc.
>Get rock hard, she unzips me and I think she's about to blow me, but comes up and just wraps her legs around me and slides me in.
>20 minutes after meeting her.
>Three sessions.
>Ended up crying all the way home.
>Stayed with gf for another year, would get knowing looks from her cheer teammate all the time.

>be me, 11yo M
>parents go out of town for the weekend
>mom has friend/co-worker come stay with me
>she’s in her mid 20s,
>I know her enough
>she’s always super nice and engaging
>she’s always around, even when I’m changing or bathing
>think nothing of it
>in the bath on Saturday night
>she tells me she’ll help wash and rinse my hair
>ok
>after she’s done, she tells me to stand up so she can wash me better
>I’m clueless
>she starts washing my dick
>diamonds
>she washes of the soap
>nice and clean
>BOOM! Dick in mouth while I’m standing in the bathtub
>feels so good
>I let it happen
>I shoot a blank load
>she laughs and smiles: asks, “want to so mine?”
>of course
>she warns me we’ll both get in huge trouble if I tell anyone
>it’s a secret
>she strips and gets in the bath with me
>we touch for a bit
>then she guides my duck in her
>blanks shoot immediately
>she fucks me a few more times randomly while babysitting

You cry after sex?

Hooker
50 bucks 30 minutes 9/10 girl but defenetly not worth it
The brothel was so unerotical it killed it
With eyes shot I could barely cum

i know a BS-story if I see one

heath ledger got u laid!

>girl on OkCupid hits me up
>says I look like Jimmy Urine from Mindless Self Indulgence
>lol okay? we decide to meet up downtown
>we meet up and start talking
>she explains that she's in an open relationship and has permission from bf to fuck me
>sorta weirded out but im down
>cant go to her house so we walk to wooded area of cemetery
>make out, she sucks me off, doesnt want to fuck bc shes on her period
>tell her i dont care, she shrugs, and bends over a rock
>start fucking while getting blood everywhere
>finish and throw condom on a tree branch
>get McDonalds then go to her boyfriend's house to talk about how it was
>play halo with her bf and go home a couple hours later

Your life is a BS story.

>be 16
>girl lives down street from my cottage in southern Ontario
>right next to native reserve where they hunt fox and moose
>one morning get text asking me if i wanted to go sneak through fence to smoke weed in hunting shack by the lake
>fuckyes
>bring pliers and cut hole in fence for us to squeeze through
>shack door isn't locked
>natives rich as shit so shack is actually more of small cottage and has shower
>joke about taking a shower
>she says yes lets as she takes out a small pipe
>i'm diamonds
>we smoke and she teases me about my boner
>she takes the lead and grabs me by the shaft and leads me to the shower
>water isn't connected
>She says oh well and turns around, thinking shes leaving
>bends over and pulls down her sweatpants, ass facing me
>not wearing underwear
>end up fucking bareback in the shower with no water
>both high as shit
>fucked her against the wall
>left a man

Fuck I miss that cottage

Sold a bitcoin back when they were $50 to buy tickets to a old school drive in movie. Me and my girlfriend fucked in the back seat of my car. I FUCKING WISH I STILL HAD THAT COIN!