Childhood misconceptions thread

Childhood misconceptions thread.
You post your childhood misconceptions, believes... Like there were Pentium 5, or GTA with exact copy of your town...

I believed, that in 27 I will not shitpost on Sup Forums.

I used to think that mothers taught their sons how to have sex by having sex with them when they were old enough.

This is the tip of the iceberg, I was a sheltered child.

Lol, that is not quite bad.
I know people, who thought that you should fuck in the ass...

I though that when you put it in a girls vagina you just leave it there until babies lol

Oh boi. The most exotic misconception about most common misconception topic.

I thought, that I'd have a car, a house, a whore, a gf...
Still living with parents...

I thought by 19 I'd have a gf and an education but instead I live with my grandparents and want to kill myself. If there is a god I don't understand why hes so cruel to me.

...

I thought he liked me back

I thought, that stick is difficult to drive and it is made only for truckers to make them suffer.

Kill yourself faggot

Thought frontage road was some long ass motherfucking road that stretched on forever.

Lol you're probably in the same boat

Don't but it

Buy*

I live with my best friend and I have a gf. That’s two up on you, queerbait.

I thought oral sex was poisonous until like 13

I thought women had fewer ribs than men

I used to think that my life existed in the mind of a giant who was reading a book about me and imagining what he was reading. I was like 4.

Sweet I got dubs on my 22nd birthday

I thought babies came out of belly buttons. I also thought girls had dicks as well, and that you rubbed them together until she got pregnant

I thought my family was poor. Turns out we were just wasting money on dumb shit.

I thought that AIDs happened randomly if you had sex and the only way to prevent it was to wear a condom. So if you wanted to have babies you risked creating aids.

>I also thought girls had dicks as well, and that you rubbed them together until she got pregnant

sword fighting with Uncle Earnest a lot as a kid?

Because old TV shows and movies were in Black and White, I used to think that in the olden days, *everyone* could only see in Black and White. Then some amazing event occurred that gave everything color.

Same lol

When I was little I believed almost anything possibly poisonous could kill instantly no matter how little contact

My mom had to explain to me that all babies are not born via c-section. I watched a lot of TV showing c-section as a kid. I must have been like 6

"put your wiener inside her and pee"

Happy birthday user

I thought, that automatic transmission reads the road signs and keeps the speed and driver had only to brake and steer.
And also I thought, that manual is for men only.
I was 7 years at the moment. Said it to my dad - he laughed hard, but he explained all mechanics of car...

Also I thought, that parents are keeping very interesting anime on VHS on high closet... Once they forgot to extract it from VCR, and I watched it, turned on the sound... My dad came into room... And he had to explain all. I was 9 at the moment.

I used to think that when a family moved, they traded houses with the family if their new house.

I also thought that only boys pooped.

And that Canada and USA were at war with each other.

Thought, that arab is born, when a man fucks a goat.
I was 12...

>And that Canada and USA were at war with each other.

Canada and the US went to war in 1812, the US lost. Faggots will reply with "nu uh, it was a draw." because a draw looks like the canadian army burning washington dc to the ground

Happy Birthday.

My mom was going on about how we were broke but my dad pulled in over 100,000 a year. Scared me to the point I thought we were going to lose the house. No wonder I'm a nervous wreck today.

me too.

My friend at 15 or 16 thought you would die if you touched regular train tracks with shoes on.

I thought that all cats are female and all dogs are male and that they mated with each other. Female offspring would result in a cat, male in a dog. Yup. I actually believed this until I was about 11

oh similarly i thought if you put your dick in a vagina it automatically created pleasure, like there were nerves that just sensed the nerves of a vagina and caused tinglign

Lol, you were not in museums, where paintings are much older and color?
I don't believe that someone is THAT stupid.

Yes, I know this.

I thought they were at war when I was a little kid. It was based on nothing, if not the fact that I didn't know shit about the world and always heard about wars.

Shit man, where to begin ...

not me, but this guy i used to fool around with wtih refused to bottom for me for the longest time. like i got tested and showed him the results but he said he wasnt okay with it cuz 'we could still get aids'. he thought it happened randomly when two gay dudes have sex, that it'd be created spontaneously.

I believed that my uncle worked at Nintendo.

We're talking about 6 year old shit. If you're under the impression that everything spontaneously gained color, what difference would paintings make? None. You do realize kids will believe *anything* right?

thirdworlder here
I thought, that English were invented because our language is old and not fun at all...

Your best friend is probably fucking your girlfriend

i thought it was done the same way, cuz i knew me and my brothers were all C section. i kept asking how cave people survived and everyone refused to explain

Not a lot of people take their kids to museums these days, and the fucksticks I knew couldn't care enough to pay attention anyway.

I thought I could join the marines and kill sand niggers. I had drawings of wars and people getting rektd in kindergarten. Parents got brought in because of it. 20 now and I can't join the marines because I'm missing a kidney.

>something that should have been childhood.
My 50 year old dad thought that Neil Armstrong could walk on the moon because he had weighted boots. I had to explain that's not how gravity works.

Yeah, but even in 6 years you should know about old books or pictures, or stuff...
At three years - OK, nobody will take that toddler to museum of some sort, or explain something... But in 6 brain starts working, most children realize that santa is daddy or other man and so on.
Not museums, old photos in family archive, or something colorful from grandparents, who is 100% were alive in b/w tele era.

I just don't believe that there are such retards...

I thought the star wars prequels already existed and were from the 60's, me and my friends were huge star wars fans and some kid at school told me about it's a kid named anakin that becomes darth vader. that was before the first prequel came to theaters.

I thought that 'real life' have some cheats, because most are like poor, but minority is rich and they are cheating hard.

I thought my parents grew up in the black n white days. I would see a show from back then and it was black and white. All footage was black and white so thats what i thought...LOL

It's called a misconception for a reason. It's retarded to think a 3 year old even has a concept of time, color, etc to begin with. You're vastly over-estimating average 6 year old intelligence. The same kids that believe monsters are in their closets and Santa gives every child *in the world* presents in ONE night and climbs down a chimney?

The fact that you can't conceptualize why a 6 year old might come up with the Black & White/ Color paradigm shows the limits of your current intelligence.

I also believed the force from star wars was a possibility, if I just tried hard enough, and that magic and ghosts were proven facts that everyone knew were real.

You'd be surprised. Idiocy knows no bounds. My dad works with niggers and they trash the bathroom for another nigger to clean. If they work in an office they will wipe boogers on the doorknob only they use and have to look at.

Have a happy birthday, and remember to give that Waifu the worship she deserves.
*Exceptions include lolis and traps, fuck those (not literally).

When I was a kid I thought Hitler was the bad guy.

They put cigarette butts and toilet paper in the urinals. Almost all of them are functionally illiterate. And they work at a 25$+ union job. I bet tgey still believe some weird things.

Wow, you're applying way too much logic to kids that barely have those skills, lol. They literally thought colors magically happened one day. Wtf difference would color pictures and old items make? It's not meant to make sense.

When I was little I thought the Founding Fathers were good guys.

>The fact that you can't conceptualize why a 6 year old might come up with the Black & White/ Color paradigm shows the limits of your current intelligence.
No, I meant that you are really retarded, if you thought like that in 6 years.
>You're vastly over-estimating average 6 year old intelligence.
Where are you from?I guess something is wrong there. Lead in water, radiation, food, environment....
Because in my country kinda all children at 6 year old were smart enough to make bombs out from matches... And majority didn't believed in Santa nonsence (some saw dad dressing, some thought a little bit...)
And it is not my thoughts, my mom was a kindergarten teacher...

I guess the Hitler's plan worked in our country... Kids were smart...

Islam?

jeez

that life is worth living

Nigga, where are you from?

Yes, because making bombs at 6 years old is a totally average thing to do. I live in the U.S. I've been in honors programs my whole life and double majored in CompE and EE. But hey, I must be retarded for having a childhood misconception, yea? Lol.

used to believe the earth was a spinning ball floating in space created from a random explosion out of nothing for no reason

I didn't have any childhood misconceptions because from the day of my ninth birthday until I was sixteen my UNCLE BRUTALLY RAPED MY ASS EVERY FUCKING DAY

>thirdworlder here
>I thought, that English were invented because our language is old and not fun at all...
This is actually true

>Yes, because making bombs at 6 years old is a totally average thing to do.
Also disassembling stuff and figuring how it works it average too. And it requites the same level of intelligence to find out that there is no Santa, that colors were invented way back before color TV was invented...
> I live in the U.S.
As I know, copper piping is common thing. And sometimes it is welded with lead-solder back in the day. Now it totally makes sense, why nigger are paid money for being black... And your underdevelopment in 6...
>I must be retarded for having a childhood misconception, yea? Lol.
This misconception is too strange for normal.

Tao.

I thought until now that earthquakes are something rear and dangerous... Until I visited Japan...

As a kid I thought the penis unsheathed like a dogs, being circumcised made the idea horrifying

...

>Misconception too strange
You legit have 3 people who thought the same thing here, lol.

>disassembling stuff, figuring out how it works
Part of why I'm a CompE now. Been doing that for ages...

>underdeveloped
literally skipped 3 grade levels.

>lead in copper pipes
Nah, my house was built in 1884, but it was remodeled in the late 80s before I was even born. Lead free solder. Dad did it himself

Idk where you're from but santa, monsters in your closet, and a lot of admittedly 'stupid' things are common place among our children. Perhaps it's unfathomable in your country, but here this is probably one of the less weird ones, to be honest.

I did disassemble things but I was a tad older. But I agree. Americans are retarded.

piss is stored in the balls

Not the faggot you're replying to, but you drank water at school right? LEAD PIPES. ASBESTOS. Even in HS our water was so full of flouride and heavy metals that if you took fountain water and put it in any container shit would stay cloudy for almost 5 minutes. Tell me that's good for you. You probably did still drink flouridated water.

>You legit have 3 people who thought the same thing here, lol.
Ok. Maybe it was common in US.
>literally skipped 3 grade levels.
Good for you.
>Nah, my house was built in 1884, but it was remodeled in the late 80s before I was even born. Lead free solder. Dad did it himself.
Okay.
>Perhaps it's unfathomable in your country, but here this is probably one of the less weird ones, to be honest.

Fuck, I just realized that I am more retarded, because in our country we had no way to have fun, but you had color TV that were working normally... You didn't had hard time, that is why you didn't gave a fuck about this back in the day.
>LEAD
Small amounts are not that bad. At least he wasn't drinking it all the time.
> ASBESTOS
We had it in our country,

that lead from a pencil was the same and poisonous lead.
got poked by my pencil and literally thought this is it, i'll be dead in a few minutes

Dude me fucking too

When I was in 5th grade, the rest of the class went to the gym for some reason, but I didn't want to go. The teacher said that I needed to clean the windows if I wasn't going, then. There was no window cleaner around, so we went to her house just about a block away. I remember there being a cat. I really remember washing windows. There's a chance I was molested in 5th grade.