Sup b, so I might have a problem

Sup b, so I might have a problem

>Be me
>22 years old, straight, male, into ass play
> Kept it a close guarded secret that I like performing anal play on myself
>I've had dildos for years, literal years, stored away and no one has ever found them
>Was able to event keep it from my girlfriend who was living with me and my parents
>We move in together think I have to give it up
>I throw them all away
>Few months later start to get the urge again
>Order a new one online gets delivered to a vacant home and pick it up
>Comes in an inconspicuous box, brown 4 inches by 15 inches
>Hide it in boxes in our guest closet in my old trading cards
>3am start going to town

Now for context the dildo I ordered was fucking massive, I mean the biggest one I've ever ordered

>She knocks on the door
>"user let me in"
>Wtf what is she doing up at 3am
>Get my clothes back on she's getting impatient
>Oh fuck oh shit fuck shit fuck
>hide everything under a towel next to my computer desk
>Unlock the door and she comes in
>immediately notices the forearm length box on the floor next to the closet door
>"What does this go to?"
>"Some cards I was looking through"
>"oh okay... well come to bed"
>"S-sure, I'll be there soon"
>She wakes up earlier than me and goes through the closet until she found the box
>Told me she's fine with it but things I'm secretly gay now


How the fuck do I get out of this situation?

You don't
Stage your death, get a new identity

OP is a fag confirmed

I'm gay I get it. It's hard for some people to accept who they are.

You tard you could've said you ordered it to spice up the relationship also you are indeed bisexual

ass play doesn't make you gay

What do you think of your sexuality? That's the important question. It's a self-definition.

See I had the same thought, but men aren't attractive to me, and the thought of fucking a dude is unappealing

Try ordering a strap-on and see if she'll go for it. If she's actually into it, buy an engagement ring next

I have had her finger my ass once, didn't really like it. I think it's something I'm more comfortable on my own.

I like ass play and I've had my wife peg me. It's no thing at all now for her to pull out a dong and work my ass. Makes me cum buckets.

I also aren't attracted to dudes. They kill my boner.

Some people think the ass play makes you gay but I say you define you.

I mean first of all you set some boundaries about privacy. If you remove the context of the thread, she really shouldn't have been rifling through your things, especially since she did it purposefully while you where asleep.
Secondly you should play the trust card, that she probably has secrets from you, and you from her, and you weren't ready to talk about some of yours yet, and she forced you to, She violated the trust in your relationship not only physically (as above) but emotionally.

Go buy a locker, put everything of yours in it, Playing cards, money, keys, photos, everything of value to you. (But don't put your toys in it, leave those in a box somewhere else) Keep it locked and keep it as a reminder to her that she violated your trust.

She said she thought I was cheating on her or some shit, but I do see your point.

Problem is I have no dirt on her, none. But I also don't really give a shit if other people found out either I mean I saw my stepdad watching a video of him and my mom having a threesome so no shame on my game.

Faggot.

This is the 'I want my relationship to be contentious' path. Honesty and openness feel far better.

>this

she shouldn't have been just rifling though your stuff in the first place, ex once just picked up my phone, started going through all my facebook messages and asking me about them. And I didn't have anything to hide but it still really pissed me off

Just explain that you are into ass play, it's as simple as that. If she acts weird explain that fear of judgement and being ostracized is what made you keep it a secret in the first place.

>She said she thought I was cheating on her
Women will always find a way to make you the bad guy. My mom was reading my mail be cause she was "worried about" me. Don't know how to counter it, if you object at all you're typical male being angry and unreasonable.

Same, except I'm a 25y/o virgin with no girlfriend and people thought I was gay before I started putting things in my anus.

There is literally nothing homosexual about being attracted to feminine penises, shoving things in your anus or admiring muscular men.

Or just act cool. Who gives a fuck.

Pretty sure that's some kind of abuse, careful with that shit, you don't need it.

>this

the thought of naked guys or dudes fucking eachother without me even having to be involved at all disgusts me

turned on by women, turned completely off by dudes

>fellas, is it gay?

How a dude fucking you? Is that also unappealing?

i liked this greentext also my name is noah

A lot of women do this instinctively, It's partly just because their interested in you (And what you do) and partly because for women 'your stuff is their stuff'.
It's why setting boundaries with women is important, not only with young women, but adult women who have gotten away with this shit in the past.

>She said she thought I was cheating on her
This is the same as blacks pulling the race card, or cops pulling the 'smell weed in your car' excuse.
She can't rifle through all your stuff on a whim, then pull the old 'I was worried' to justify it, see It completely undermines any and all trust in the relationship, and confidence in the person.
You should be double weary, in most cases when a person is paranoid about being cheated on, it's because they have cheated on you, It's a self projection on the relationship.

So say you cheated on her, and she forgave you but put a tracking app on your phone. It's like this but: She cheated, and demanding you put a tracking app on your phone balances out the cheating in her mind.

just fucking say it was for her and you wanted to keep it a secret and you wanted to open it to see if it was the right one