Be me

>be me
>31 years old and in debt
>no choice but to live with parents
>2 jobs, work constantly
>never had a girlfriend
>still a virgin

Soon I will have paid off all cosigned loans, then I am thinking of killing myself. How should I do it? I would prefer not to make my family suffer in any way beyond the possible pain of loss.

just get into crypto and ride wave while it lasts

you might get rich and not want to kill yourself anymore lol it's not like you've got anything to lose

I have no money to invest into crypto...

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lmao! im going to be 33, in debt, have to live with parents, don't work, have many different girlfriends, still a virgin, saving for marriage..

you're doing it wrong bro.

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Sell off everything you have that is worth anything, then spend the money to travel someplace you always wanted to go.

When you get there, just get by for a while however you can. Try to get a job or whatever, or try crime.

If you find a happy life or if you run out of money, can't find a job or crime doesn't pay off, send your family a letter/email whatever telling them you love it in the new place and you won't be coming home.

Then either live new happy life, or find some remote place to kill yourself. Find a hiking trail spot with a cliff to jump off, OD on drugs out in the woods, whatever.

start WW3 like south park season 20

Oh look, it's that wheelchair bound poster!

You should kill yourself with years of heavy drinking and hookers like a real man

Cool story, you literally just said, "my life is better than yours, you are doing it wrong!" You should be a counselor or therapist, you have a knack for it.

That's not a bad idea. I could sell what little I own for a plane ticket, and lie that I got a new job. Then fly somewhere and kill myself. Though I don't know if not having true closure would cause them more pain than just knowing I killed myself,

My bad bro, I didn't mean to say my life is better than yours, i was just telling you to stop worrying so much. You aren't going to jail for being in debt, I'm not a very attractive guy but I dress nice and get attention from girls from it, not much but enough. Stop caring so much my man..

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In all seriousness, how do you not want to kill yourself. Maybe you are not in that much debt, but if you are... You should realize by now that your life is pretty much ruined now. The only way out is inheriting money or winning the lottery

There is a great blog from a man who killed himself and left instructions on the cleanest way. Search car park shotgun suicide blog, may be taken down by now but that's the best resource I've read.

oh also, I have been told I should be a therapist by many people. I'm going to look into schools for it next week..

We don't care how you do it as long as you remove yourself from the world.

Oh look, it's that wheelchair bound poster!

Start a hobby of wood working.
Once it's established tell family going to forest to find better wood.
Cut down tree and let it kill you.

>implying others aren't aware of Jewish money tricks like yourself.
Debt is for the weak.

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OP here. I am overweight and can't do much. In my mid 20s I had a fairly severe back injury, I can not sit, stand, or walk without being in pain. If I sit for more than 20 minutes my feet go numb,

Ever since then I have gained weight and work takes twice as long, so I have no prospect of being efficient and doing good at my job.

There is very little for me to hope for in life anymore,

I'm going for a nice walk outside, when was the last time you walked out of your fecal cavern?

Lose weight then you fat fuck

Y'know what would make them suffer more? Doing you and leaving them in the dust. Fuck em. Once you've got all debts paid, you're a free man minus the daily shit. I'm 31 too and just got outta debt, the world is your oyster after all that dude. Get yourself an active hobby that you get a lot of passive enjoyment out of and stick too it, talk to people, you'll get a gal.

I've actually been thinking of it for myself lately but I don't want my dad to have to find me after. Was thinking of taking a train up north to like Montana or somewhere. Take one from my revolver after I hike for a day or so, I'm sure a bear or something would clean up the rest.

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Only thing I can do is eat better and barely eat. The problem is I get almost 0 exercise besides work. I won't lie that depression doesn't make me want to eat healthy...

Neck yourself ya dumb nig

1 shotgun, one early morning, one multistory carpark. Ring paramedics and let them know what you are about to do then off with your head. Your body should only be seen by a trained professional who has the correct counseling and support to deal with your selfish trauma you will inflict. Not like you care but it's nice to keep earth tidy. Thank you for doing your bit and I'll give you a wink in the afterlife.

killing myself would be a very easy way out, I don't really care to take the easy way out. I've recently interviewed for some good paying jobs with benefits. I nailed 2 out of 3.. so I have some hope.. either way, i just don't care.. as long as im not in jail, have a nice place to live and food to eat, free money, girls, what is there to worry about?

Of all the homes people break into and kill the disabled resident why not yours? Can you start shouting out of your window at the local hoodrats or nonce at some kids with aggressive fathers?

Squeeze carotid artery

>don't take the easy way out

In debt
Says he gets free money
Lives with parents

I smell shit, and it isn't the stupid log posts.

Bro thats no excuse even if you just do ten push ups and sit ups a day to start and added a few every week youd be losing. it isnt hard to excersize at home

He is lazy and uncaring. Just help him not be a strain on his family and our culture.

you could listen to jon stewert for 2 hours

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No one gives a shit about your wasted life. You're such a pussy that you'd never kill yourself. When you talk about it, you've already shown hesitation. Those that do an hero just do it and don't go out like a lil' bitch gaining attention on a third rate shithole like Sup Forums. You'll be back tomorrow or next week making this same thread so other losers like us can make you feel better.

But hey, maybe one day soon your mother will come home and find you stretching yo dick to shemale hentai (again) and it'll just break her, and she'll go on her spiel of how you were so bright as a child, with such a future, and now you're nearly halfway through your natural life still living at home, never going to give her the grandkids because your 'sex life' is at the soft, blue glow of a lonely, basement mounted monitor. Maybe...just *maybe* this would be enough to set you over the edge to die like some nutless wonder by popping all the oxy's she has in her medicine cabinet after developing her dependency a few years back from the downward spiral of her own life that led her to raising such a social and sexual reject as yourself.

Just irks me to see fat fucks complain about being fat when the littlest changes can help you lost tons of weight.

Did you read my post before? I literally can not exercise due to a medical issue. It is a large part of why I am in my situation. I was not overweight at all until I had that problem.

I have 2xgrade 5 tears in my spinal disc's a l4-l5 and l5-s1. I am genetically disposed to rapid disc degeneration and it is only going to spread.

Hey we're a first rate shithole cucklord

Take out any credit cards you can (protip: if one is willing to give you a card at your shitty score, may are; and until you use them, your credit score does not decrease), max them out buying and pawning shit (obviously at a loss but who cares you're dying), and leave your family the cash. Enough to pay for a funeral.

I just want to come home from work to be greeted by a pizza delivery gal
in a sexy cat costume, eagerly awaiting her tip with a cute shifty smile
like a Jew expecting the US to serve as its permanent army after
a convenient political alliance agreed upon during the cold war.

If Stephen hawkings can make it as half man half machine so can you. Granted you will be the poor man's model with a speak and say.

how else am I going to survive without a job? I have to leech of someone for now.. once i have a job and money saved then I can move out. Why is this a hard concept for you to fathom? Like it can't be done? There are tons of people in debt living with relatives, at least I'm applying for jobs and making an effort to continue on with my life instead of worrying about shit..

Hawking has a reason to make it.

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There are excersizes for people with injuries....ive worked with multiple physical therapists that specialize in excersizes for people who are disabled to keep their weight down...
My cousin blew his arms off in the oilfield and still hits the gym..
I have a client with no legs and he hits the weights and compression bands for two hours a day...youre just a whiney bitch and thats why you cant get pussy .

Jesus fucking christ, OP needs a burn unit.

No he doesn't. Nigga just spouts bullshit that fags who want to sound smart applaud. There are no aliens we are an anomaly accept it.

I have an appointment with my spinal surgeon Thursday, this isn't far off. They are considering spinal fusion, which will make my bed ridden for 6 months, I will likely lose my jobs (I live in shit hole Texas where you can legally get fired for no cause),.

The surgery will cost 7500, would be 98,000 if I didn't have insurance.

You've got a legit reason to utilize welfare faggot OP, that's why we have it.

>maximum autism

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The fact you have that image speaks volumes.

You are fucking stupid sir, I do physical therapy daily, and meet with trainers weekly. I can't lift more than 5 lbs. I can't sit for more than 20 minutes. The exercises I do are stretches to make sure my muscles don't cramp which could cause me to bend improperly damaging the disc's more. I literally can not bend forward, watch videos of how people with my condition have to get out of bed.

Go fuck yourself.

I live in Texas too and guess what that's how life is. If you can't work you can't expect them to support you or hold a place. Life moves on. Take your rehab time to do some khan academy shit so u can find a new job bitch. Besides if your in Texas like you say then u know there is a fuck ton of jobs available right now in the metro for crippled whiney fucks.

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>invest in crypto
>become independently wealthy
>why kill?

> I live in a shit hole too. Stop complaining, we should be happy in our shit hole.

Yes because you would be so much better off in Idaho.

good point, I was on welfare for a year, i let the benefits expire because I was getting money from my parents for doing chores, cooking, grocery shopping and applying for jobs. But you're right I should re apply for benefits..

Pro argument you got there. I suppose you would tell starving children in Africa they shouldn't complain, because they could live in Burma instead.

Just because it can get worse, doesn't mean you shouldn't try to make your situation better. The first step towards that is realizing and admitting the faults in your systems.

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At least im not the one on Sup Forums crying about wanting to kill myself faggot

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But what about at most? At most, what are you?

A man with a job his own house no debt and a pussy to fuck when i want ...
You pathetic bitch

Took you a long time to invent that story

Im getting ready for work...unlike you

Pullups motherfucker.

>be me
>27 years old with no debt
>work part time
>don't want a gf
>wizlife is great

FMLA dipshit, learn how it works.

Why would you off yourself over no gf? Pay off your loans and then have some fun, user.

Exercise, paleo diet, and lithium orotate for the depression. Counseling might not hurt either.

Read this, change your life

You love your parents OP, since you don't want to destroy them the way you know your suicide would. Partly you are blaming them though for
forcing you to pay your debt to them, as if working hard and learning about credit responsibility from the only creditors on earth who love you and want you to succeed is a bad thing. I have a kid your age OP and I still try to teach her things like I've done all my life.
Your parents love you enough to be teaching you about hard work and honouring your financial commitments. Instinctively you know this. Pay close attention here OP I'm giving you the straight skinny. You are depressed. Clinically depressed OP. Some of it may be because of your circumstances and being a virgin and all but regardless of that seek help for depression. Depression is a real disease that can be treated with therapy and medicine.
Tell your a doctor you are having suicidal thoughts and are actively seeking means to kill yourself. If what you really need is to grow up and leave Mom's basement and shave your neckbeard and learn to talk to girls, you can figure that out with therapy. Crazy mad pussy in some therapy OP, literally. Or if you need longer term help with chronic major depression, your doctor is the place to start. Good Luck OP.
Never Forget your parents love you or they wouldn't have cosigned your loans in the firstplace. You owe it to them to grow up and learn the lessons they are lovingly teaching you.

Why don't you just get the fuck off my back with all these worn out platitudes. Think I haven't heard all of this before?

Yup, sucky sucky me me me
phase of depression. Lived it myself OP.
Still a disease. Still needs medical aid.
Speaking personally and from experience here son. Reach out to a medical doctor. County hospital if you are a poor. The other colourful details and where they fit in your puzzle are ultimately up to you. Depression requires medical aid. Get some. That's not bullshit. Straight Dope

I guess this is what you live for. I think it would be good if you killed yourself just so you wouldn't be able to give out these invariable outcome belittling speeches.

go to beach, swim away from land until you can't swim anymore. become fish food.

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Okay, now I'm just convinced all you need is loud
rock and roll to make you less of a pussy. ACDC, Metallica, it's all good

Just OD with xtc and melatonin. You’ll have a peaceful death while you’re asleep

He's speaking the truth though. No one by default wants to end their lives, it's against our very nature to feel this way (at least at the level where you're actively seeking ways to do so).

You have a sickness, OP. Try to view it in the same terms as your spinal issues. If it's affecting your life in the same sort of debilitating ways as your spinal problems, who cares about legitimacy?