I have 4 hours left on a 12 hour shift. Anyone got anything to share? Feels? Autism? A good, hearty laugh...

I have 4 hours left on a 12 hour shift. Anyone got anything to share? Feels? Autism? A good, hearty laugh? Help me out here Sup Forumsros

Do you have a rare pepe collection?

Not on my phone, no

what's your job? let's talk

...

Security guard. Working the graveyard shift (in Sweden). Basically I sit on my fat ass for 12 hours at a time keeping an eye out on a lobby area.

Do you get paid well?

Nope. But I have no real expenses either so it doesn't matter

have a vaporwave pepe,

Grave server/cashier for a casino restaurant. Just me and the cook all night. The security guy hangs pops in every once in a while, might hang out. They all complain of being bored. Beats dealing with tweakers though, I'd assume.

Tweakers are fine as long as you don't interrupt them as they are shooting up. Just ask them politely to fuck off and they do that, and they rarely cause trouble in general as long as you don't startle them.

Might be different wiyh food service people. Ones I've met are whiny and bitch over every little thing they can.
This woman came in once, got a burger. I honestly messed up and forgot to put no onion. No problem, just replace the veggies and done, she just went to gamble for a minute and came back. Brought out the burger back out of the kitchen made righr, hasn't been out for more than a minute. She said it was cold and wanted it comped. Said I'd call my supervisor, got the security guy since you're supposed to during grave (like I said, it's justbme and the cook at night). Guy talked to her, and then asked me questions about the situation, and then made her pay for the meal. Afterward, told me she was on the machines shaking like a motherfucker. I don't care if someones high on shit, I'll serve whoever, just dob't be a rude fuck trying to fish for free food. I have another story that isn't about druggies.

>be me, 21 years old
>mfw girlfriend of 14 months tells me she's fallen out of love with me
>mfw every semester of college is harder than the last
>mfw I have no drive to do much of anything anymore
>mfw my meds just make me nauseous and kill my libido
>mfw I had a minor heart attack the other day and my BP spiked to 185/113
>mfw I have hyperparathyroidism caused by tumors
>mfw I have cushings, caused by tumors
>mfw I have a dermatology appointment tomorrow because of possible skin cancer
>mfw fibromyalgia and dynamic mechanical allodynia makes everything hurt
>mfw I'm 21 and I just want everything to stop

Please share, if you're up for it

>Be me
>Be American
>No universal healthcare
>Dies of fucking ebola

Shit, well I know it means jack squat but I hope it works out for you in the end

if there's any real reason I have for not believing in a God, it's Any good-hearted, sentient overseer wouldn't do that to people. Or worse, as is the case for many. I believe in higher power or greater energy than myself, but there is no organized definition for it that I've found to make sense at all. If there is a God, they're not on my side and I have no reason to be on theirs

So sec. warned me about some guy who was talking to himself out on the floor, and gave a description. I'm a nosy fuck, so when it was dead for a while, I went to the restroom (the two closest are through the kitchen, or the one just out on the floor), and took the opportunity to scan the floor for someone fitting the description. Ended up seeing both him and the sec. guy in the restroom. I've also taken my nametag off before I left the restaurant, just in case, don't need crazies remembering my name. I take my piss, go back. A minute or so later, sec. brings him, basically saying he needs to leave for causing too much concern, but is letting him get a drink really quick. I get him a to-go cup of lemonade, ring him up, even used some pocket change since he was a little short. Guy wasn't bad or anything, just totally off his rocker. Before he left, he pulled two little stoned out of his pocket and gave them to us, saying if we brought them home and boiled them in like a pot of water, they'd turn to gold.
Later on, the sec. guy came around asking if I wanted him to get rid of the rock. Told him I was going to boil it in water at home and see if it turns to gold. He just like "I'm walking away, you're crazy too.."
Later on when he made rounds, I pointed to the megabucks machine, and made a point that I can put a dollar in that machine, and have a 1/trillion chance of winning 10mill, but at least it doesn't cost me a dollar to boil a rock in some water. Still haven't done it, but I want to at least do some basic research, and make sure it isn't some explosive compound or something.

In the restroom, the guy was saying how he was part of some muslin-assistence gov. program or something, but that they kept doing what they do and being violent. When ordering his drink, it was something about how his family was in trouble, did some bad stuff, some in jail. While paying, he started talking about star wars battlefront. Was a funny night.

Here's a thought: How aware are you of the health state of every cell in your body? Ever pluck a hair, rip off dead skin, maybe jack off a little too hard?

I'm aware that most 21-year-olds shouldn't have to deal with chronic pain, tumors and cancer scares, heart disease, etc

That's empathy from one human being to another human being, another organism of similar size and mental capacity. I'm talking about the scale of human being to individual cells (or "God" to human beings). Think about it, it's taken thousands of years and countless humans to build even our current understanding of biology. You think a single entity would easily be able to build a similar understanding on a similar scale difference?

It'll be over soon bro.

Like I said, tweakers are alright as long as you don't interrupt them. First time I was on solo patrol of an industrial area I did just that. Fuck it was scary.

>when a starving man smells a hot meal he will kill to have a bite of it
>tweakers are the same regarding their poison of choice

>a guy was shooting up in a secluded area of a dockyard
>i decide to step in
>this heroin junkie, emaciated as fuck, pounces on me and catches me off guard
>needle still in his arm
>he was skin and bones so getting out of the clinch was easy
>thing is he had a shiv on him
>we wears stabil vests so we are considerably safer than without
>take one in the ear, neck, inside of thigh etc.
>brown bread
>pull my baton, smack him silly
>he still struggled after I cuffed him

Fucking terrifying

*stab vests
God damned auto correct

Shit man, you got blood tests after that, right?

Formulated that one wrong. Had I gotten stabbed in the ear I would have died, same with the neck and thigh. I came out of it unharmed, thankfully. Although I ran a fever and a cough for a week afterwards

Carcinoid tumors or papillary?

...

Thanks, I try my best

Make sure you don't have stingray aids

papillary mostly. Parathyoid tumors scheduled to be removed, pituitary is riskier business due to size and location. They don't wanna fuck me up for life with brain surgery, so they'll probably do chemo and hormone therapy

I know pituitary surgery is mostly successful, but still, considering my age, they're taking every precaution

I love night shift at any job, but only rotationally. Going in at 7 is odd but when everyone leaves and it settles down it's a cool feeling. 2-4 am are peak aesthetic hours. Walking out at 7am into the ligjt sucks though. Could never work nights full time at any job.

In college i lived at home and my buddy and I would hang out and smoke on the soccer field at those 2-4am hours when the fog was at its thickest. The night watchman at the school drove a white motorcycle and parked it in the same spot every night. I never saw the man in person, but my friend and I used to joke that he was fighting demons in the halls all night while we were high in the fog. Just a dumb memory but one im fond of.

Went to the doctor for the fever. Caught some kind of minor infection but it cleared up. Got in a fight at a different time after that, got clipped in the chest with a skinning knife. Vest took it like a champ

Papilary prognosis is excellent, it's just a matter of time to get through it. Im assuming you have some kind of pituitary adenoma. I can't say im envious. It won't kill you but it's tough to fuck around with endocrine side effects. I hope medical therapy works for you. In 5 years theres a very good chance this is behind you and you're in excellent health, symptom free.

Really want to know what you do with those rocks

Kind of funny having a couple drinks the "end" of my day in the morning, leaving the place heavily buzzed in the morning like I'm some kind of degenerate.

I plan to boil it, and probably see it does nothing. But according to quantum physics, they can still technically turn to gold, right?

pituitary tumor is causing my cushings. Increased cortisol is fucking me up stress-wise, to the point that I've been on anti-depressants for years before they did a full endocrine panel to see if there's a different cause. At the end of the day, it's just realizing that tumors are something I have to worry about on the daily, something I thought I wouldn't have to give a second thought for another twenty years.... it sucks, man. And then there's the dermatology appointment tomorrow. Within a couple months, a nickel-sized mole with irregular border and uneven tone/melanin appeared on my back, and every now and then it hurts. They'll probably dig it out of me tomorrow and biopsy, and knowing how much skin cancer runs in my family, I'm just trying to prepare for another diagnosis. It's a wonder I haven't gotten myeloid leukemia at this point

I rotate day and night. I worked day monday and tuesday this week. The lack of rhythm is causing me to constantly feel jet lagged and hung over

Man sounds like you have it really rough man. I've been smooth sailing compared to what you are going through. Hang tight brother and hope you turnout all right

A man who provides for himself recieves Gods love. Keep at it man. Try some new music.

I'm trying, man. I have a bit of buddhist philosophy keeping me going

Personal suffering comes from one's own desire for personal change: the sick want health, the poor want wealth, the lonely desire love. If you take what you've been given in life, every bit of it, and you accept it as being okay or fine (not exceptional, but also not the end of the world), only then can you truly appreciate the beauty life can give you on a daily basis.

At least, I try, anyway. I study, compose, and perform music as an outlet, but that can only do so much

I have to work 4 overnights a month. I just pack them right in a row and get it over with.

Got any recommendations?

Trust me I would love to stack my shifts and work only one or the other, but that is up to local planning to decide

Get of the internet and go back to work

what kind of music do you normally listen to? do you have any aversions to genres/etc?

I'll share some autism with you. I was at the gym last week and this girl I always check out finally talked to me (asked me if I was using the squat rack). I managed to segwey into a reasonably normal, non-autistic conversation with her and it was going pretty good. As we were talking, I dropped my water bottle on the floor with the cap off, spilling water all over the place. Without thinking I blurted out "fuck my ass" as it slipped out of my hand. I immediately realised what I had said and looked up at her with an expression of pure autism on my face. She nervously laughed and then said she should probably start her set. We used to smile at each other when we'd see each other. She's avoided eye contact with me for the last week.

Thats brutal

Beautiful words. gonna a go now and hope the best for you amigo

>mfw no face

Metal, rock, punk, synth goth, country. Would like to try different genres but most of the stuff my friends listen just doesn't work for me

...

That is vicious, dude. Keep on trucking though

>Bahamas - Lost in the Light
>Ben Howard - Every Kingdom (full album)
>Submotion Orchestra - Finest Hour (full album)
>TENDER - Erode (among other songs)
>Gustav Holst - The Planets (my favorite is Jupiter)
>University of South Dakota Chamber Singers - Let Me Fly (full album - simply beautiful selections)
>Jerusalem Trio - Piazzolla - The Four Seasons of Buenos Aires (trio version is so much better than full orchestration)

these are some of my go-to favorites that aren't exactly in the spotlight

> Hypothetically I own a firstname.lastname gmail address and other people seem to use it to sign up for stuff. In this hypothetical world I now have:

> Amazon account from someone in the UK, person A
> Bank account from someone in Australia, person B
> Jeep dealership account from someone in the US, person C

Do I buy person B a 55 gallon drum of lube from Amazon, buy person C a box of dicks with the bank account, and ship person A 10 Jeep left doors? Wat do?

>Hypothetically.

Thanks man, now I have something to look forward to when my shift ends

Hypothetically, you should buy the lube for person b.

buy person C a box of dicks and person A the lube, both using the funds from person B

Thanks for the suggestions. Remember the stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood. Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.
>This continues to be purely hypothetical and is not happening

> STRICTLY FALSEHOODS
Somebody's getting a jeep manual.

Sorry for derailing your thread OP. Just thought I'd drop in and see if I could add some fun to the end of your shift.

Can anybody recommend any good new wave tunes?

Naaah it's fine. Gave me a good chuckle. Thanks user

This gif is oddly soothing

I fucked my couch once

Cloth or leather? What was it like?

Isn't it?

I get angry when i nut

Checked
That might be an indicator of something else, have you seen a psychiatrist about it?

>dad died a week ago
>Was never really attached
>Never loved or hated
>We lived pretty much like Craigslist roommates
>I have to give a speech at the funeral
>Don't really know how to give a speech for a man that I was never interested in
>He wasn't really interested in me either
What do?

No i just nut either to early or to late

>be me
>be 16
>puberty hit me during summer vacation light speed, grew a foot and became for buff
>still kinda shy and academic focused but girls finally started noticing me
>Some Chad is throwing this super huge house party to start junior year off
>my crush from middle school comes up to me asks if i was going
>I honestly didnt want to go because i dont really dig the Chad party culture but this was the first time she ever talked to me ever since 6th grade
>butterflies in my stomach, instinctively say "I'm not sure, ill have to see. might be busy that day"
>i thought i was suave af
>"well im going and i was hoping to see you there. i never see you at these parties"
>fuckit ill go, dress up that night, but get stuck in traffic. She called me a few times and i told her i was on my way
>by time i get there she is with her female friends, looks kinda wasted and excitedly heads over to me
>"user youre finally here! come with me i have a surprise for you!"
>she goes up stairs to some empty bedroom and starts making out with me
>confused boner.jpg
>she takes off my shirt and then starts taking off her top so shes in her bra and then she gets on top of me and starts licking my chest
>feel awkward af because im sober and shes not
>she starts moving her hand down to my pants
>instinctively shake her off
>"WTF user?!"
>"im sorry i cant do this. It's not right"
>she keeps cussing at me as i put my clothes back on and leave to play runescape at home as i planned
>next day find out she told people i had a micropenis and was gay
>tfw called a fag rest of hs
>ftw no one wants to hang out with me because they would be hanging out with a fag and it would lower their chances of bagging girls
>tfw didnt go to prom and rest of hs kinda sucked because i didnt want to take advantage of a drunk girl

do you feel anything?
if no go generic. he prob did something for you

you are literally Michael Cera at the end of Superbad, you fucking cuck

Fag

no michael cera got laid in the end

You cucked yourself, brah

I'd recommend some cosmic horror like Lovecraft or Job.

Go through his shit and meditate on the fact that he is gone. You and the junk you've gone through are probably all that is left of him. Maybe you'll develop some feelings good or bad. Better than none.