Ok Sup Forums i will share a number of storys of my dad, he is and will always be the "trailer park legend"

ok Sup Forums i will share a number of storys of my dad, he is and will always be the "trailer park legend".

let me begin with a pretty interesting one.

>dad is walking along boardwalk after fishing at a pier.
>he has always lived in virginia beach
>stops and talks to sum grills
> they invite him to go to a bar so they can sit and eat
>they go and eat
>my dad still has the cooler he brings fishing with him
>instead of ordering he grabs a beer from cooler
>the moment he cracks that cold one shit goes down
>bouncer goes to him and tells him to leave
>tells him that he was bout to leave anyways
>dad goes to grab his shit and the bouncer is trying to wrangle him to the door
>dad does the logical thing and fight back (actually stupid if you didnt catch the sarcasm)

the story is pretty blurry from this point as shit is happening.

>dad fights and i guess a "good samaritan" comes and knocked my dad the fuck out with a beer bottle
>goes to hospital
>has some metal plates put on his skull
>after this he goes to jail
>jail sentence is something like 8 months
>gets out and goes to his long time GF's house after re-kindling love through letters in jail
>wtf.jpg
>enters the trailer but the only people home are her sons and daughter
.

you know they are white trash because their names where, kyle, jake, and brandy.

>see's some dudes shit in her house
>ask kids wtf is goin on
>they tell her that tyrone has moved in
>goes ballistic
>grabs all his shit piles it up in the center of the living room and burns it
>also finds a game worn steelers helmet with a signature on it
>he gets permanent marker eraser and scrubs it off
>leaves the helmet as the only thing not burned
>his then GF arrives and flips shit
>calls cops and he then returns to jail.
>mfw he literally screwed everything up on his first day out
>mfw he destroyed a 400 dollar helmet with one wipe

i have plenty more storys so bump to let me know if you want more.

pic related, thats him with a big ole red drum

i also have a shit ton of letters he sent me from jail that are pretty funny tbh.

ill also share some of his favorite jokes.

1st joke

person one: why does the face on a penny face right while all the other heads on coins face left?

person two: i dont know why?

person one: because all the other presidents turned their back on a nigger lover.

Share

Keep going OP.

And this guy had kids. Sad!

2nd

whats the most confusing day in harlem?

fathers day


many keks where shared over these jokes, especially since i was like 12 when i was told em.

Got any 757 nudes

sounds like a bro tbh. would have as my dad.

ok now that i got lurkers here lets begin.

>be me 16, about 3 years ago
>dad just got out of jail and is staying at his aunts
>i decide to visit
>my aunt is rich as fuck but hordes it like a jew
>we first stay at her second house that is only used to hunt deer
>riding in 4 wheeler
>dad finds fuckin dying woodpecker and picks it up and in the next week he cares for it and gives it to a shelter
>he loves animals
>we go to his sisters house for a bit
>that night he gives me a 4 locos

this is where i learn that any story starting with a 4 locos ends badly

>get wasted off 2 of those and like 6 beers, cant remember anything after that but i assume i drank more
>wake up with vomit everywhere wondering wtf happened
>go to toilet and clean up
>dont have any backup cloths
>we are abandoned by aunt for a few more days
>stay in fuckin vomit shirt for 4 damn days

ill cont

Is he gay?

used to but that was a while ago. that brandy bitch was quite a slut. and on that matter ill tell ya what those kids have lived up to be. brandy is a slut in her parents house, jake moved to his friends house and now sells weed for a living, kyle is pretty chill and hangs with my dad even though his moms relationship with my dad is long gone.

really was, smoked the devils lettuce with him for the first time too.

>finally get back to aunts house
>we decide to have my dad call up his friend to take us to the pier and fish.
>have fun catch some small ones
>dad breaks out the 24 pack of beer
>offers me one
>i decline
>he gets pretty shit faced and desperately tries to get with this black chick struggling to fish
>the friend there is pretty cool and is a nice dude
>tells me how he met my dad in jail
>the dude owned some franchises and was fucked over so he got his crack head brother to go and steal the money back
>goes to jail
>loses family
>loses half million dollar house
>loses marcedes
>lives in a van now


ill cont

He fucked you in the ass too.

this dude will come into a different story later and its fuckin crazy what happens to him

>midnight hits
>all normie fishers are no longer at peir
>one chill dude fishing pulls out a bowl and smokes quite a bit
>legit pulls out a half gallon of milk and captain crunch and eats it
>the rest of night is pretty boring
>go to his other friends house that morning becuz his other friend had to go to work and couldnt give a ride back to my aunts
>chill there and sleep on his carpet
>wake up to him sitting on the couch next to me smoking dabs
>fuckin 2 toddlers are right there too
>mom catches wind of this all night fishing and goes ape shit
>threatens to call police and i eventually calm her.
>aunt finally comes to pick us up
>damn this was a interesting couple weeks
>leave next day


i have more but yall dont seem interested

keep going op am lurking

now onto the most recent event

>go to dads last year
>pretty chill he is with a new GF and her son is about my age and is chill
>walk to beach every day to waste time
>the dude from the pier comes over and is staying a couple days
>probs smokin meth in their room cuz it smells like burnt plastic and they havent left the room for 2 days now
>leave the house a couple days later
>not a very eventful visit other than being offered weed by a homeless dude at the beach
>after a couple days pass my dad tells me the guy stabbed 2 dudes that came to their house
>RIP those niggers
>dad kicks him out
>gang shit is happening
>dude is found dead a couple days later


idk what gang it was bit it was a real shady part of town.

RIP him, this is what jail does to people. having a great house and Mercedes plus a family. to being found dead from gang shit.

well one thing is for sure, he had an eventful life. i think maybe a part of him knew where he was going, but he liked the rush.

This is exactly why the world is completely fucked.

my dad is now back in jail for violating probation. he says he has become a vegetarian cuz the meat there fucked him up and he works out and does yoga n shit. he compares how he looks to a "calvin klein underwear model" so i assume he is doin well.

i have more stories but they are older and probs less eventful.

fuck off, shill.

yea i think this is what he was goin for. he had a more eventful life than most. but he always says to go to school because the shit he did was all because he didnt have any options in life. no high school diploma nothin. but he says that he is a prime example of a fuck up and knows exactly what not to do and uses this knowledge often.

also ill put this here, he caught a shark with his bare hands. he saw it kinda beaching itself (looked like he was swimmin up against the shore, i was there) and he immediately ran over and steve irwined the fuck out of the shark. bonus points for it being in the middle of the night.

fuckin shilll

nah he was a fuckin man whore tho. live life to the fullest.

>"i live for a good time, not a long time."

self awareness and repentance can go a long way to repairing mistakes made throughout one's life. he obviously wasn't an idiot. just make sure his lessons sink in. have some tits.

this is the only baby photo i have of me that wasnt fucked from a flood. maybe my aunt/grandpa/random family member has some

>mfw out of all the fuckin baby photos

thanks for the tits, he is a redeemable person but he has anger issues out the ass. he has made a living and will again and he even accepts that even after losing everything in life several times he always comes back and gets his life straight then slips up. he plans to move out of virginia beach when he gets out of jail but as of yet he doesnt know where he can go and is pretty much just askin around for people to let him stay at their place for a bit while he saves enuf for a apartment.

its a bitch to ask all his fuckin freinds for their addresses so he can mail em.

what are the laws on off the grid living in your state and the ones surrounding it? i have an ex addict friend who found it very therapeutic and for a few grand managed to buy his own land and build a house on it.

if its rural he should be all good. it all depends on where cuz if there is people around it could raise some zoning shit but otherwise i dont think anything special applys. my grandpa built a little cabin right next to a highway (like a dirt road from the main road down but real close) and we dont have any problems regarding that

Fuck off trumpsters

its trumpeter dumb ass

lol, this kid.

Well if hes good with the neighbours the problems should be minimal. id definitely recommend it. its amazing how different a person can be when their body and mind is absorbed in something like that.

Your fake stories fuckin suck, fag.
And if I'm a kid, you are a sperm.

maybe you need to get permits for sewage, building permits. and if your far enough away from society there wont be any cops to fuck with you anyways. and cops are people too they wont remember all the dumb ass subliminal laws that he may unknowingly break.

well thats not OP because im OP, the stories are very real and unadultured. my aunt is so wealthy because she owns the restraunt "margie and rays" in VA off sandbridge road if that proves anything. if you want me to prove something else just ask.

>LOGical
>brANDY

When does he get put?

Fuck. "Out" when does he get out?