MAHA THE FRENCH CHAMPAGNE

MAHA THE FRENCH CHAMPAGNE

WATCH IT MASSON

MWHAAAHAAA THE WRENCH

blur the hand a little maybe?

>what is depth of field

French excellence right here

>tfw Wellesposting is making a comeback

...

Imagine being Orson in that ad and having to be all like "Muuuhaaaahhh, Paul Masson, you fuckin' fine, all delicious with your in-the-bottle fermentation and horrific faux-French monstrous taste. I would totally drink you, both in this advert and one for frozen peas." when all he really wants to do is drink another $500 Dom Perignon in his dressing room. Like seriously imagine having to be Orson and not only sit in that chair while the extra pours his disgusting California champagne in front of you, the favorable lighting barely concealing the suspicious-looking sediment building in it, and just sit there, take after take, hour after hour, while he perfected that pour. Not only having to tolerate the monstrous fucking taste but Paul Masson's haughty attitude as everyone on set says it's VINTAGE DATED and DAMN, PAUL MASSON CHAMPAGNE TASTES LIKE THAT?? because they're not the ones who have to sit there and drink the disgusting fucking piss water contorting your palette into horrific flavours you didn't even know existed before that day. You've been drinking nothing but a healthy diet of Krug and Bollinger and later alleged moonshine for your ENTIRE CAREER coming straight out of the boonies in Wisconsin. You've never even drunk anything this fucking disgusting before, and now you swear you can taste the chemical contaminants in this mass produced sham pigswill as it's poured again and again for you, the extra smugly assured that you are enjoying the opportunity to get paid to sit there and revel in the "French excellence (for that is what they call it)", the excellence they worked so hard for with fermentation techniques in the previous months. And then the director calls for another take, and you know you could break a bottle and stab everyone in this room, but you sit there and endure, because you're fucking Orson Welles. You're drunk as fuck and don't know why the extra isn't doing anything. Just bear it. Slurr your lines and bear it.

i fucking hate memes
but i love this

...

DON'T YOU EVER TALK TO ME OR MASSON AGAIN!

is that a tiny or ahuge Orson Welles

>Watch Jodorosky's Dune
>Jodorosky starts talking about meeting Welles in a small French restaurant
>Welles has drunk 5 bottles of wine and ordered more food
>Jodo negotiates a movie role but Orson won't budge
>Finally gets him to agree by promising to hire the restaurant chef so he can eat the same way while on set

Really makes you think

>tfw you want to Wellespost but you gotta go out and be a normie at a Halloween party instead

CUT MY LIFE IN TWO PIZZAS

There is a California champagne by Paul, my wife's son

>October 28/29
>Halloween party

>not having responsibilities on your weekdays

goddamn NEETs, go back to /r9k/

This.

maAaHAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

i love this pasta in all its incarnations

...

I remember getting hamemred with some freinds one night and they said I kept repeating this over and over. Fuck you guys.
inb4 normie

>He doesn't have Halloween parties to go to all weekend

Fuck are you doing with your life, man?

>Halloween party on Monday
Normies gotta get up on weekdays.

Personally, I'm gonna binge a load of horror movies on the day.

I get it

This. Halloween, St. Pat's, and New Years are literally the three most prime nights for even permavirgins to get laid.

Slutty outfits
+
Booze
+
You can wear something that hides whatever part of you is the most hideous like tall shoes for manlets or makeup for the ugly.
=
Some bitch getting the D.

St. Pat's they are just super hammered and have no inhibitions, and New Years it's a mixture of all of the above. You are guaranteed to at least get a kiss and see a tit on NYE. No matter who you are.

>CHAD MATH

I AM LITERALLY SHAKING RIGHT NOW

>going outside

It's so easy bros. Just be yourselves.

And by that I of course mean just be someone else for the night so you can bamboozle some silly ho into giving you that ass.

I was homeschooled k-12, there's no hope for me.