Choose

choose

r u kidding? 100$ every time

...

$100, obviously.

Would gladly earn 300$ a day thanks

option red
i'll pass the million in like two years and i can't live two years from one million
also, 500 free cash every day plus 500 bank for a nice house and car, no work for life, that'l be great.
people chosing option blue are stupid like a gallon wood

i think i would make more over my lifetime with the $100 per

When I was cocaine addict I'd sit in front of my computer and jack off about 20-30 times in the span of 12 hours. I would have been making $3k a weekend

$100 per fap, you would be stupid not to. It would take a while to wank yourself a house though

Are you seriously going to fap 3 times a day for the next 10 years? Or 1 times a day for the next 30 years? Or 1 times every other day for the next 60 years?
I don't think so, $1M would be better, a fatass whore won't cost a penny and will suck my dick when i'm willing to.
Blue option for me

>
How far do you really think a million dollars will get you?

I could totally fap at least twice a day, that'd come out to 73,000 a year. shit, that's damn good money.

Dubz of truth

You stupid asshole thinks you can beat those fapping numbers?
Fucking ameritard

It's more important to think long term, if you take the million, you could end up losing it all somehow, investments or what not. but steady cash flow can't be beat.

100$ every time
Masturbate 10 time a day for 3 years = 10950 masturbations x 100$ = 1095000$ in 3 years

This is a stupid question. The first one is a drastic change while the second one is better than a well paying full time job. Everyone would choose the second one if they have even a sliver of a mind.

I would earn my current salary by just whacking it 2x a day. Since I pretty much already do that, I’d take the $100.

What happens when your precious $1,000,000 runs out? At least if I could manage 5 a day, every day. I could have a good weekly figure of cash

It's simple. Grab the million, transfer it to bitcoin, then fap away. Nothing they can do about it.

Oh, and I forget to tell that I will sell my semence so I will have extra money

well if you took the $100, and masturbated a mere 4 times a day, you'd earn more than $1mil after 6.85 years. seems dumb to take the lump sum here.

Is there a bonus if I do butt stuff?

$1 million. Every time.

$100 would take masturbating once a day, every day, for over 27 years to make that much. Even assuming you did it twice a day that's still almost 14 years. 3 times a day is just over 9 years.

You could easily take that $1mil and invest it in something, and make 5 times that much in much less time.

This nigga got it figured out.

>100 every wank
fucking hell even one wank a day and i could give up work for life
and i wank 2-4 times a day without fail
i'd have the energy to bone the missus more than twice a week as well

I already beat off at work every day. Now I’d just be double-dipping.

But then you can't masturbate

If get 1 million in the same day anyways

If you invest that shit right away instead of blowing it all on stupid cars and boats, a million dollars can go a loooong way.

Aha. Making money while you make money.

I take the million with that kind of money I have a hooker bj me ever time the need comes about

But then you never masturbate. While masturbating, you can earn a better than most steady income and invest the rest of the money you don’t use for video games and tendies, since you’ll not be paying rent because of parents, you’ll have far more to invest in the long run and you can still enjoy those trap gay threads you love so much.

100$-300$ dollars a day is an amazing supplemental income.

Have some ok job on the side, put it all in savings, and never worry about having spending money again.

100$ every time, I'd make the million in less than 14 years

And? There are plenty of eager fucks out there, who will do it for free. If you're really that desperate just get a dog or something.

Obviously, from a contractual/legal standard, $100 every time I masturbate.

Using the terms of this contract, I am not bound to either ejaculate or orgasm. I can therefore masturbate many, many times a day. I could do this 10 times a day and have my million dollars in 2 years, 8 months.

100 every time
i'd be rich af

I can masturbate 3 or 4 times a day for the rest of my life.

I'd rather be able to jack it

I already masturbate 3 times a day, been doing it for at least 5 years, c'mon 10 years ain't nothing

How is this even a choice? $100 for something I'm probably gonna do daily anyway?

Hell, it'd pay better per-month than fair amount of jobs. You could wake-up, jack off, then go about your day doing whatever. Boom, roughly 3k a month.

Not being able to masturbate isn't a big loss, especially not if you can make $5mil off of a $1mil investment in 6-7 years.

100 $

Find me an investment where I can 5x my money in 6 years.

$100 every time! I'd make $1500 - $2000 every month, EAZY!

retards, retards everywhere

>people chosing option blue are stupid like a gallon wood
Not if they're like 90yo with no more sexual drive and 5 years to live.

Probably go with option blue.
It takes 6.5 years to get the same amount in money assuming you jack it 4 times daily.
Instead get rid of student loans in one go. Keep the money I make, reinvest, fuck bitches to get rid of pent up stress

$100 a wank all day long. I can easily crank out 3 a day without any effort. That is more than enough to never have to have another job.

$100 a day for a year is $33,600. Assuming you'd get that tax free you'd be set for life.

Tell me just how your view is so superior then

i'd make that in a day

>Failing the Stanford Marshmallow experiment
>Thinking you're smart because of this
Ok pal

And even if you are hard up for money, just spend the weekend beating your meat hardcore, earn a couple of grand.

I'd be like, "hey ma, going to work!" every time I head to my bedroom LOL

You didn't really think this one out OP did you?

>500% ROI in 7 years
Let me guess, Bitcoin fag?

The KEY is in what is missing in the second requirement. All you need to do is masturbate, not climax. Meaning you can do a short stroke, and you've masturbated. With a bit od dedication you can make the million in a month.

>Consistent source of income
vs
>LOL BIG MUNNY NOW PLS

You sure showed us my dude.

On Venus, maybe

Second one, I'd make a million in a single day regardless, might as well be able to do it repeatedly

>$100 every time you masturbate
Anons. It doesn't say "cum".

This includes edging.

You get a steady cashflow every time you edge yourself, and when you finally blow your load, you also get paid. Even if you want to have sex with a real girl, edge first and you still get the $100.

This is like being paid to breathe.

Reinvest with 2% earnings a year while someone masturbating twice a day makes 8%. At least I see the degree was well spent

100 bucks every time. math is too easy.

Do no fap for a week then just spend two days jacking it and I'd make more than what I usually do in a month

THIS. This dummy probably just thinks they could invest in cryptos and buy a country or something.

>Find me an investment...
I'm not here to baby you, but it really isn't that hard. 5x over 6-7 years? That's peanuts. You're making 1.4x a year on your investment. Most investments aim a hell of a lot higher than that (2-3x).

Student Here, $100 each time, Mon/Wed/Fri/Sat/Sun, 2 times on sat/sun.
$700 per week, $2800 monthly.
$33600 per year after 3 years of studies I will have $100,800.
Nice enough to save and invest then every time I want something just jerk off.

According to this, I would earn the larger prize over the course of the next 27 years, spankin' it once a day, as is my habit.

That's a long wait for payoff, considering that I could just pay people to jerk me off if I were a millionaire.

And that's assuming that, as a millionaire, I couldn't fine a wife of suitable caliber to consistently fuck. I think the million's the no-brainer option

Now I am interested too. What secure investments do you have? 200% a year, why are banks not doing it?

>doesn't understand finance
>would "run out" if he had a million dollars
>even ultraconservative investments wouldn't you $30K annually.

You're clearly retarded or 14

What?

I live in poor ass shithole poland, where 500$ a month is a typical salary.
Option 2 means I can quit my job and dedicate myself to my hobby.

What is your hobby?
Also, nice quads.

This is totally different, if you choose the red options you assume you will masturbate AT LEAST 10.000 during your life.
Depending on your age this should be pretty hard, i guess only teenagers will MAYBE have chance to reach those numbers.
Seriously, masturbate once EVERY day for 30 years is fucking hard to achieve.

>cant answer the question because he doesn't actually invest

Good returns on investments are like 10%.

protip: gambling on cryptos isn't "investing"

Earth has 365 days in a year in case you didn't know

With inflation in mind and jerking of twice a day, someone choosing the second option would outrun you within 11 years

I would earn more from the second option

Not mentioning the prices for hookers, since you no longer can fight your wiener

i'll take the 100 dollars, only because it doesn't say I need to cum to earn it.

Gime 100 bucks a shot - I'll get RICH BIATCH

ITT: permavirgins who think a wife = sex slave

I would love to make 700 a day!

But youll have to stop fapping

make that 1k/ day if u were working really hard at it

> Would never run out no matter what if I just jerked off

Blue - 1 time payment = easy loss
Red - Unlimited Income = ???

> why are banks not doing it?
Because it's not possible. That user is a delusional 14 year old who think money grows on trees.

Kek must have slipped typing that

Are you god?

100$ per masturbation:
1.000.000/100=10.000
10.000/(365*5)=5,48

After about 5 years and 6 months I would have the million full, and could still make money.

I wasn’t really asking you to help me you retard. I was being sarcastic.

I'd rather get paid for something I love then give up something I love for money.

I'd probably take the 100 a day, but will be inflation adjusted? Otherwise it might be worth fuck all in 20 years time.

But right now I reckon 5 times a day would be easy enough. 182k a year is a pretty decent salary.

You are a genius, a sick sick genius

If the red option was $1 instead of $100 then most people would choose option blue instead.
Being unlimited income is not what make red the inherently better option.

I have the REAL ANSWER.
Masturbation isn’t defined as “to orgasm”, it is “usually to orgasm” meaning just by jerking off for a few seconds means masturbating.
I can grab my cock, pull up and down twice then let go and repeat 50 times per minute, if I do that for an hour then I get 3000x$100= $300,000 for an hour, If I do this 3 times a week,’I get $900,000.
900k x 4 = 3.6 million per month, for a year it becomes 43.2 mill

43.2 MILLION USD TO JERK OFF FOR A YEAR