Ask a drunk doctor anything

Ask a drunk doctor anything.
I'm feeling like I should help people out who want medical advice and can't afford to go to the doctor or just don't want to etc
I'm going to be dumping some porn I like, so if nobody asks any questions, I don't care, enjoy the porn. Today is about you, Sup Forums
I'm a neurosurgeon btw and I just accidentally killed a patient during surgery 2 days ago. I have all the medical training that your primary care doctor would have. Being a neurosurgeon just means I went on to specialize in brain surgery, past the requirements of being a primary care doctor.

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have you ever seen a nigger in real life before?

B8

What's the easiest And painless way to commit suicide?

What type of disciplinary action did you receive for killing this person, if any?

So you trained as a general practitioner prior to becoming a neurosurgeon? Or are you in a weird country where GPs don't have additional training before working as primary care doctors?

Any nude pictures of one of your real girl patients? Just asking.

loneliness

The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.

are you a street shitter?

D E S I G N A T E D

Nembutal

I fucking hate niggers and yes
jump off of a building, at least 5 stories. you die instantly and there is barely any time to reconsider and you can't pussy out once you have jumped. pills and alcohol, slitting your wrists, all gives you a chance to reconsider and if you slit your wrists, you lose consciousness before you actually die, and often people call paramedics before that point and end up being saved. jump off a building if you really want to die without pussying out.
it really wasn't my fault, it was an old man that had a heart attack under anastasia, so the anesthesiologist is probably going to get a lawsuit, but the hospital has insurance for situations like this. i still feel like if i had worked faster it could have been avoided
a primary care doctor in america doesn't require one specific type of education. basically there are allopathic doctors or osteopathic doctors and the difference is really insignificant for a primary care doctor, at least to a patient. neurosurgeons or really any type of surgeons have to go through basic med school before becoming surgeons, so if you have a surgeon and he actually remembers what he learned, he's just as qualified to be a primary care doctor as your primary care doctor.

I've been getting the air knocked out of me while sleeping recently, could this be related to a l4 herniation? Think its serious?

no, i crack open their skulls in a room full of people so its not really feasible or possible to do something like that
no and im not a dindu either. white american, had to work harder than any other race except asians to get where i am today

what are things you look for in drug seeking behavior?

sometimes after fapping the tip of my dick starts to sting for a while. it only seems to go away, when I go for a pee and take a dump immediately. why?

I've been getting heartburn at night recently and then I assume shitting it out the next day. My bunghole burns so bad user. I'm on heartburn meds but also an alcoholic.

OK. I'll bite.

My family has gotten cold sores on our lips as far back as I can remember. My older brother is a disgusting human that has that, athletes foot, etc just because he's fucking gross.

I, in the last couple years, started getting the same grouping of tiny bumps around my cock. Not necessarily on the shaft, but in the pubes above it. It also has been on the crack of my ass.

I'm not sure if this is that strand of herpes attached to my nervous system (because it's going through me at that point) or if this is remnants of shingles I had when I was younger.

Advice?

Any tips on getting rid of a sebaceous cyst on my nutsack? Been there for like 7 years and hard as fuck.

>are you in the underground vivisection club?

It hurts when i eat and when i don't eat, should i kill myself?

sometimes I have pain in my chest around the heart area when inhaling. stressed out coffee addict law student here. Do I have a heart disease?

do you also work with spine/back issues as a neurosurgeon? im supposed to have l5/s1 discetomy for a herniation into my sciatic nerve canal and im having trouble deciding whether or not i should go through it

Other than this dude dying, have you ever messed up an operation causing irreversible damage to the patient?

I been having palpitations it causes me to stop breathing for a sec and halt what I’m doing, it happens regularly or happened. I cut out caffeine and went back to decaf and it hasn’t been happening I now strictly drink water and minimized sugar intake. I went to the hospital about it and they did a blood test and blood flow of the body test and said everything checks out but the palpitations continued. Was it the Caffeine? Keep in mind I’m 18 and they also told me my heart pressure was high for my age I forgot the numbers also what can I do to lower it?

You're shitting me, America is actually so shitty that they have no further training for their GPs? It still makes me mad that osteopaths and natropaths are allowed to call themselves doctors over there, but I would have hoped a medical doctor working in primary care would be pretty easy to distinguish.

I'm a medfag over in New Zealand if you know where that is. Just finished my PGY2 year, starting working as a non-training surg reg, still deciding what speciality to apply for. Any suggestions? Thinking I may go for plastics, but there are so few spaces on our schemes over here.

OP, does being a neurosurgeon pay well?

Also, how long and shitty was your education?

people asking for drugs that they have no business asking for, like codeine for pain or oxy for sleep problems. generally its younger people who they caution us to avoid overmedicating, and the older a patient is, the less anyone cares. you can give oxy to a 90 year old if their foot hurts in the morning, but if a 20 year old has a legitimate spinal disease and requires medication, you need extensive testing or medical records that prove their condition before writing a prescription. most of the time, if someone wants pain medication, they get it. they've just had their skull cracked open
i sincerely doubt it. if you have an l4 herniation you need to be seeing a rheumatologist on a regular basis, because they can rule out specific possibilities. there are so many factors when it comes to the spine that you really want to have it examined in person for your own safety and piece of mind. sorry if that isn't the answer you were looking for.

No. Left sided chest pain is rarely ever cardiac

whats the best way to secure an adderall prescription?

Get your affairs in order

There are brown spots appearing at the tip of my penis. Cant be std since virgin (plz). Is it skin cancer or some shit?

Been taking Ambien for 3 straight years. 10mg a night. Never took extra but rarely missed a night.

I just stopped last night and it was horrible, what's the best OTC alternative that isn't Zquill related?

My girlfriend has the flu but also wants some fuck. Is it worth?

Not OP nor a medical professional. If your BP is high, old timer doctors will tell you to eat more raw garlic in your diet. It helps decrease blood pressure. Are you overweight?

Thank you, op.
I got assigned a doctor as part of my obama care, and she is a naturopathic doctor. What does that mean?
She's very night, we've been trying different anti-depressants over the last year but unfortunately nothing has worked yet and some made it worse. Trying to keep an open mind but shit sucks, makes it difficult to work and I feel like a fag for even having issues. No desire to do anything at all, hate everything, feel like an angsty teenage girl. Social anxiety out the ass which is the oddest thing since I know how retarded it is but it's like I can't help it. Practically get panic attacks when dealing with people and I'm a big strong in shape dude (thought working out would help - it did help for getting healthy, still hate myself tho).

I write and draw for a few websites and sell complete garbage fiction on amazon. Make enough to pay off student loans and rent but that's it.
Please operate on me and give me a new brain, preferably one that can do long division.

Medfag - You're fine. Sounds much more like anxiety than anything exciting. Look up white coat hypertension. Have a nap and less coffee

How can I lower my Blood Pressure it’s very high and I’m only 18

Stop eating sugar.

my leg after i compounded my tib / fib and shattered my talus and completely dislocated my entire ankle, took 2 years to recover and had about 15 surgeries, I still ride quick and unprotected. How common are these sites?

Pic is old, just a clean out i needed to have for an infection, the real injury was 100x worse

try killing yourself

You are not good at this.

Bump this for curiosity.

roll

Wow hey thanks! Is this something I should be worried about? I should mention I did have a severe panic attack a few years back and ever since have had some anxiety is that the cause?

Oh fuck it, I'll bite. One of the issues I've had for probably 20+ years is that every once in a while, it feels like my heart has a weird beat and it kinda takes my breath away. Not painful, just uncomfortable. It's only one beat (kinda feels like an extra strong beat or some shit) and it might happen once or twice in a day and then not happen again for 2 weeks. Might happen 4 times in a day for 3 straight days and then not happen again for a month or more. Totally random. Been to SEVERAL docs regarding it over the 20 years and been told that it's "normal." It's scary as shit though. I figure a 6th opinion.... over the Internet can't hurt.

Im a very small guy, 5’4, 110 pounds (ikr)

I have a lipoma the size of a grape in my upper left arm. Aches a bit sometimes. Is it worth having removed or should I just live with it. I'll probably have to pay for most of the cost. Thanks user.

Did they not do an ekg?

I HAVE THE EXACT SAME PROBLEM

Yes they did, and blood test they said everything came out fine which puzzled me

Medfag - Essentially almost certainly the cause. Nothing to worry about. Talk to your GP, it's no great stress. Ask about CBT (cognitive behavioural therapy). Sounds bullshit but there's amazing evidence for it working for anxiety. Most first world countries have it funded, not sure about america

>anything
For real though, for the past month I've had weird ass symptoms. I'm a very high level athlete so keep in mind that I'm in shape,know how to take care of my body and hydrate really well.
About a month ago I started feeling dizzy when I was swimming,like losing my balance. Happened for around 4 days, shortly after and for about 3 weeks now I constantly wake up feeling extremely hungover, dry mouth, disorientation, dizziness, nausea. I don't know what's causing it. Took blood tests everything came back normal. Not sure if it's related but I had been coughing up white tissue, not phlegm like tissue tissue.
So what could it be?

Not doc herre but I had one on my face, surgery is the only option I had as It was growing. If yours has ceased growing you could just live with it. If it's still growing the longer you leave it the worse it will be.

You’ve given me more info then any doctor I’ve been too, thanks so much Sup Forumsro, you have no idea how long I’ve been worried about it being something worse

It's not a problem, you insecure fuckers. Oh my god, you are so afraid to die, yet you're wasting your life on Sup Forums?

Lately, I'm unable to sleep on my left side because I feel my heart beating very clearly (almost as if its bumping against the matress), anything serious?

Rub some bacon on it so it smells good and then get your dog to chew that shit off

Not OP or MedFag but sounds like high blood pressure or you’re just focusing on your heartbeat while trying to sleep

you could have a prostate infection, or your hands are dirty before you fap and bacteria is getting into your penis through the tip. its also possible that you fap too much and your muscles are stressed, which can cause you not to ejaculate properly, allowing semen not to fully exit your dick. i'd lay off fapping for a week and then fap again, see if it goes away. if not, you probably have a prostate infection and need to see a primary care for antibiotics. just so you know, you probably won't get antibiotics for a prostate infection without at least getting a finger in your ass for an exam.
drinking can cause heartburn. drink less. i mean, if you really want to avoid the heartburn then make sure you eat plenty of bread products before drinking and take antacids. get some suppositories for your small sensitive butt hole or a cream. it feels really good, user.
if you have herpes on your mouth, and you aren't having sex with someone who has genital herpes... the only way you're getting it on your cock and ass hole is if you're flexible as fuck and pleasuring yourself with your own mouth. i mean, its "possible" that it could be remnants of shingles if you had it in the past, but i would have to see it and i really dont want to see your cock or asshole, user. are you positive it isn't ingrown hairs or acne?
that sounds awful. you can always kill yourself.
you probably have ulcers. eat some vegetables and, dont eat acidic foods or foods that cause acid. stop drinking anything but water. if you need caffeine, drink green tea in small amounts. smoking also contributes to ulcers. you should still kill yourself though.
i sincerely doubt that is a heart disease. more likely excess caffeine consumption. drink more water and less caffeine. i know studying can be stressful, but remember how important it is to sleep. try motivating yourself in a way other than stimulants.
no.

Medfag - No worries Sup Forumsrosiv, hope it works out

what city?

40 year old.here. Have spinal stenosis and degenerative discs. Cervical vertebrae.

Back surgery? Or just keep taking the pain meds?

Have you ever gotten turned on my one of your patients and made them strip for an exam unnecessarily?

Yo Doc is ur job like thias?

whats the best way to cure ED?

Last bloodpressure check was 120/80 (heard it was "ideal"), but left part of my chest hurts when I press a certain part

My S/O is in their first year of a neuro program. The hours worked are no joke.

what ever happened to hyaluronic acid injections, testosterone and HGH?

prepare yourself to be dumped when she is done. Happens to about 85%

I have bad knees from decades of lugging around my big ol’ heavy log cock. Would you recommend I cart that thing around in a wheelbarrow from now on to ease the strain?

I got a weird wound on the outside part of my ear and it's like yellow crusty stuff and it bleeds if I get rid of the crusty yellow.

I had the same thing but it eventually went away on its own. I did the whole heart monitor thing too and they never could tell me what it was.

I'm positive it's not acne or hair. Red irritation all around, itches and burns. When I pop them, clear puss comes out.

I was thinking maybe I was careless getting out of the shower while drying off with my towel and it transferred that way. But again, I'm not sure. Up until that point, I had always used a condom so I'm not sure how it all came about.

I constantly produce precum when I wear my chastity cage with a urethral insert. Is there a way to reduce this?

I got an internal hemorrhoid removed roughly 3 months ago.

The location it was removed from was pain free after a month. Recently its begun to hurt in the location of surgery. Is this my mind playing tricks on me, or something I should be concerned about? I really don't want any fingers in my butt, or to do a colonoscopy again.

Are you drinking because you killed a patient? Are you ok?

Glad it worked out for you, I feel less worried now thanks :-)

On the off chance you're actually a GP, I have trouble climaxing. I have to clench my legs together, specifically my thighs, in order to cum. I can jack for ages with my legs apart and nothing happens. Wtf is wrong with me?

Dude, you're on Sup Forums, be a dick!

...

LoL they can't afford to go to the doctor HAHAHAHA typical tard USA.
Here in Spain i can go the doctor 10000000 times (and ofc, free).

gotta be wholesome every now and then :)

What do you recommend I sub for coffee or is decaf better

just to be safe i would recommend going back and insisting upon more testing. at 18 you shouldn't have any heart condition unless its stress or anxiety related. in which case, see a therapist. you don't want to fuck around with your heart, user.
they're required to have their title stated so the patient can make a decision, that's about as far as it goes. my suggestion is doing what you think you'll like the most. when i was younger, watching cadavers getting their skulls opened and peeling back protective layers, i knew that was what i wanted to do. just keep in mind how long you'll have to be in school to do what you want. if cracking open skulls isn't worth 12 years to you, pick something else.
its one of the highest paying medical professions you can work in. a minimum of 12 years schooling. i enjoyed it, but i am a nerd.
see a psychiatrist and complain that you keep getting distracted while trying to study. may take a few months. don't say that you want adderall.
id have to see a picture to know, and i dont fucking want to see that shit. go to a free clinic and stop fucking niggers and whores
no, the current flu is killing people. jerk off for a few weeks and if she lives, then fuck her.

43 yo here been drinking every night for about 10 years, have a history of hep c but got treatment. Im getting pain in my liver, like a dull ache. Alcohol numbs it tho. What do?

You didn't kill anyone intentionally I hope? They had an illness which was riskier than the operation, so you tried your hardest to save this person to the best of your abilities and this person died anyway, which would have happened if you hadn't operated regardless. Operations are always a risk, and if you weren't negligent then you should not feel guilty and instead try to learn lessons like these from the situation.

If you didn't care you wouldn't feel this urge to confess, so I reckon you are a good person and you did everything within your power.

/wholesomeb/ should be a new board

>If you know where that is
Go compare dick sizes elsewhere

please help how do i keep my cock up i have EDI plz doc

>doc
pls someone give me my daily dose

Keep drinking or you die.

I bit my Lip heavily a week ago, it has healed but since 3 days ago my face is completly numb. Did i fuck up?

A large vein in my leg, inside left, running down from groin to ankle is noticeable larger and prominent. Hurts now and again...achey.

I know it's a varicose vein, etc. I'm 43 and fairly active. Is this a serious problem? Or just an annoyance?

Hey thanks for your time OP very much appreciated :)

checked

come on op

answer

it basically means she wants to treat you with vitamins and herbs. not all of them are like that. really, it generally means that actual medications are a last resort for those types of doctors. part of moving on from depression is realizing that everyone hates everything, and anyone who is happy is insane. caffeine can help depression, weed and alcohol can make it worse. social anxiety is a matter of getting yourself out there and experiencing life more. the more you do something, the less it bothers you. the first time i cracked open a human skull, i felt sick. i didn't think it would bother me, but it did. a few years later and i don't even care anymore. its the same with anything. the more you do it, the less you think of it. here's a neat trick though. if you sleep on your back, facing the ceiling, blood will pool in the back of your brain which causes euphoria and fights depression.

Go to youtube and look for stefan molyneux. Anxiety comes from unprocessed traume and you can only process it through selfknowledge.

youtube.com/watch?v=lEHJ3EgmPgc

Yeah, but now you can headbutt people with no fear.