Jurassic World

What went so terribly wrong?

Was it
>the annoying cunt kids
>stop, wild dangerous dinosaur!
>the stupid, simple plot
?

Annoying kids are a Jurassic movie tradition.

1st movie kids weren't annoying actually. They were just kids.

Older bro was a cunt for half the movie. Shit, dude, you're never going to see these girls again in your life, just enjoy your fucking once in a lifetime dinosaur park adventure.

I feel like it wouldn't be THAT hard to take down a dinosaur if you had tanks and helicopters and shit. It had way too much plot armor from the middle to end

They didn't even try to make something more than another passable blockbuster.

The entire premise of the movie was that dinosaurs are boring. This is a bad premise for a movie about dinosaurs.

I think that's what they call character development.

>Implying Jurassic Park isn't just another passable blockbuster

>first and second movie are about how you can't tame nature and will ultimately fail if you try and control it as your own for a profit
>Jurassic world is about the park being successful, makes money and NOBODY learned a lesson the first two times. And what happens? Nature goes wild like the first fucking movie and they can't control it

Remember when this first came out and shills swarmed the board for like a month?
Notice how the same shit is happening for Dr. Strange?

The easiest way to spot a shill is simply this - their negative remarks about a film are actually a form of back-handed compliment. E.G: "My only gripe with the movie is that the action scenes were soooooo badly edited. If it'd be framed a little better then it would easily have been the greatest action scene of any Marvel film."

They only had one helicopter, though. And it was a super-smart dinosaur who used camouflage and gorilla tactics 'n shit.

i was on board until the raptors cucked starlord

>IT'S A CONSPIRACY! A CONSPIRACY, I TELL YOU!

It's not nature that goes wild, it's SCIENCE

This movie is unironically one of my favorite films and easily in my top 3 favorite blockbusters ever. I enjoy it more than the original Jurassic Park and only wish there were more practical FX in the film.

>"nature uuuuuuuuuh finds a way"

It's "life finds a way" dumb dumb

>my only gripe about suicide squad is not enough Joker

you might be onto something

And there's nothing natural about a genetically engineered Bio-weapon. That's what goes wrong in Jurassic World, not nature.

The like first scene of jurassic park 1 was that annoying shitstain getting BTFO about the raptors ripping him apart

the movie was meta and self-aware

>Implying he couldn't have had some lucky sex had he met them in their hostel room

>engineer a dinosaur to be bigger and scarier to attract customers

Why not also engineer it to be dumb as shit and just not tell anyone? Why give it two kinds of cloaking device?

the first two movies don't really exist in this soft reboot

Because it was a military prototype.

The raptor pets were so fucking retarded

This and the force awakens were just "let's copy paste the original and no one will notice"

Fuck them for starting the whole "let's make a reboot but call it a sequel" meme

they absolutely do

Militarizing the raptors made some sense because they're a pack species. You control the leader and you're leader by default. That's how it works with every other domesticated animal.

They made three of these things and one killed the other two. That's an immediate failure if you're thinking about weaponizing it.

The whole point of developing these dinosaurs was because secretly the military wanted the park to fail so they could come in and confiscate all the assets

Nothing went wrong. It made a huge amount of money and was a fun film.

>gorilla tactics

TBF the first time I saw the movie I wasn't sure if that kid was actually a kid, or an ugly middle aged midget woman

It was a decent 2/3rds of an actual movie

Shame about the lack of a first act with actual development for the characters

>first two movies
But they talked about the events of the first movie. The control guy had a fucking shirt from the original park.

As for the other two movies, they didn't really involve the park itself, so there's no real reason to believe they didn't happen too.

yeah because the dinos in the first movie were totally not bio-engineered animals right?