Tell corny jokes now

Tell corny jokes now.

A termite walked into a bar and said "Is the bar tender here?"

How are toilet paper and the Starship Enterprise alike?

They circle Uranus and remove Klingons.

Aaaaaaaaa

Who is bigger, Mr. Bigger or Mr. Bigger's baby?

Mr. Bigger's baby is a little Bigger.

What's the difference between a piano and a fish?

U can't tuna fish?

You can tune a piano, but you can't tune a fish

Rekt

Get out

What kind of cheese isn't yours?

What did the elephant say to the naked guy?

nacho cheese

It's cute, but I bet you can't pick up a peanut with it.

Lost

very scientific!

What do you call a cow with no legs?

a cow with 2 legs?

a deer with no eyes?

a man with no arms or legs lying in a pile of leaves?

What do you call a camel with no humps?

[spoiler]Humphrey[/spoiler]

nice

a man with no arms or legs lying in front of a door?

a man with no arms or legs who wants to play baseball?

ground beef

lean beef

No eye deer (No Idear)

Russel

2 guys walk into a bar. The 3rd one ducks.

Matt

home base

What did one snowman say to the other?

Hey, do you smell carrots?

I hate that there are all of these fucking porn ads on Sup Forums now

What do vampires take when they're sick?

jajaja

>not using uBlock

Coffin Drops

hmm, ublock. Thank you.

No problem

Roses are red and
Violets are blue. I like
To rhyme my haiku

What's the difference between snow men and snow women?

Snowballs

jeżyk wlazł na kamień i zdechł xd

What's the difference between beer nuts and deer nuts?

JezuzizinQuranNoPorkBecuzJews

Beer nuts are $2.50
Deer nuts are under a buck

that's not funny, that's real ! but wait, no one would give a fuck if it was explained and written in proper sentence format

I had a splinter in my hand once, but it obviously got out of hand.

DID YOU JUST SAY YOU HAD A SPLINTER IN YOUR LEG ?

What do you call an anorexic with a yeast infection? Quater pounder with cheese.

love that!!!

a classic

ugggg the wrong kind of cheezy

stop this

JUST LOST IT

Why did the golfer bring extra pants?

y

Because she got a hole in one!

lmao stfu just stfu, I don't care anymore.

A vampire walks into a bar and asks for a cup of hot water.
The barman says "I thought you fuckers only drank blood?"
The vampire says "I have a used tampon, I'm going to make a cup of tea."
Bazinga.

Oh my god it took me so long to get this

...

>a man with no arms or legs lying in a pile of leaves?

Russell.

>a deer with no eyes?

No idea?

Whats black and white and eats like a horse?

A zebra

A man, no ars no legs, stuck under a car?

ars = arms...

A man, no arms, no legs, nailed to a wall?

Holy fucking shit a little bit further down in the results and I find this
I started hyperventilating

A man, no arms, no legs, in a hot tub?

...

Bob?

A woman, sitting in a catapult?

> (You)
>Bob?

Stu.

Is this L O S S

Jack?

A guy, sitting in the bottom of a hole?

> (You)
>Jack?

Damn you're good.

okay a couple more posts, and off this shit for like ten years

Thanks

>off this shit for like ten years

Coward. Confront your fears. Release your inner child.

> (You)
>Bob?

That's a no arms no legs in a lifejacket.

A guy that fell into a vat of paint?

here's my email: corny fucker is a vegetable at home with no excuses, since you know it, email it

whats brown and sticky?

A stick

What's the difference between a cornflake and a snowflake?

I had to look it up.

I can kinda work out the joke
What happened to the sunburnt banana?
He started to peel

>
>I had to look it up.

It should have been written "Is the bartender here?". Makes it more confusing, and it sounds like you'd ask it.

well now you know

Corns are like niggers. They be yellow.

Horse saunters into a bar.

Bartender looks up and says "Hay, why the long face?".

I am 100 percent done with new jokes.

I know you know, but get to know me more, and stop playing these games with me

Speedwagon jokes will not be had here.

I only got it the second time I read it when got it and replied to OP

Piece of string walks into a bar.
Bartender looks up...says "we don't serve string here".
String leaves.
Really pissed. Gets all wigged out. Smashes his head into the wall, hair gets all messed up.
Walks back into the the bar.
Bartender yells "Didn't I tell you to get out of here?".
String says "I'm afraid not!".

>Not using Adblock