The Sanders campaign is considering sending its candidate into his rally in a rather unusual way.
Local skydiving outlets have been reportedly been in contact with the Sanders campaign, and one campaign staffer was sent yesterday for what was seemingly a "test-run".
mediaite.com
Jesus Fucking Christ, Sup Forums, what is this election?
In this thread we try to churn up enough meme magic to make sure this happens.
Other urls found in this thread:
You didn’t misread that headline: Bernie Sanders might enter his Friday rally in Cloverville, California by skydiving in.
NorCal Skydiving told Bay-area newspaper The Press Democrat that they were approached by a Sanders campaign staffer Wednesday about the possibility of making an entrance from the sky. The following day, a campaign staffer went skydiving as a sort of practice run, but there’s still no word about whether they’ll go through with the idea.
“I’ve been told they will run the idea by Bernie,” jumpmaster Jimmy Halliday said. “I can’t confirm that’s the plan. I know that’s a possibility.”
The rally will be held at Cloverdale Municipal Airport at 7:30 local time. Only adding to the mystery, airport manager Michael Morrissey tells The Press Democrat that Sanders is “supposed to make a grand entrance.”
bump
well i understand at this point he isnt getting much media about him; a stupid skydive would change that
Might as well, his campaign is going to be effectively over early in the evening on June 7.
Is it a smart idea for him to do this? Bearing in mind he already looks like he could drop dead at any second?
Would this be awesome or jumping the shark for Bernie?
Kek'd at filename
>Inb4 parachute fails and he falls to his death in the middle of his crowd.
One can hope.
Everyone gets splattered. Everyone feels the bern
so those MANPAS I stole are going to come in handy now?
Lmao this scam artist has officially lost his fucking mind
Guy has no chance of winning the nomination, he's running out of time, and he wants to jump out of a plane?
>yfw when he's chute doesn't open
The commie messiah will come from the heavens.
Whoa just like a bird.
I worked in the campaign of US Senator Broyhill, many years ago. The opponent was former Gov, Terry Sanford, who was about Bernie's age, and we had hung the tag "tired ol' Terry" on him pretty effectively.
Then a week out from the election, the bastard helicopters into a rally and jups out as the thing is landing, wearing his flight jacket from back when he was a paratrooper, smiling and waving...
Was sitting next to the guy running our campaign when it happened, he looked over at me and started discussing how we'd handle shutting everything down after the election, where to sell the office furniture, etc.
Beware elderly Democrat candidates and anything to do with jumping from aircraft.
>tfw we meme magiced this jew to stone cold steve austin the fucking earth and guarantee a hillary presidency
Little column A, little column B.
If you're going out, go out in style.
He's old as fuck and is going to botch his landing.
I hope he goes in Pinochet style
I hope he pulls a Peggy Hill and eats it.
>owen hart owen hart owen hart owen hart owen hart
GUYS WE CAN MAKE THIS HAPPEN
lol several people's life savings that were donated to Bernie will go towards paying for this stunt.
completely jumping the shark This will be his Howard Dean EEEEYYAAAAAGGGHHHHH moment.
this is a great story
probably thinking of different ways to waste money from the dipshits that donated to him
he has to show them how he spend on his campaign
>Bernie Sanders supporters
>Savings
kek
It would be a bad idea if it resulted in him dropping dead.
It would be a great idea if he looked energetic youthful, athletic and "spry."
Plus it would almost guarantee that HC or DJT would have to do something similar in the weeks ahead, or look weak.
If we could get a few weeks worth of Trump jumping 30 school buses on a motorcycle, or H'dog launch9ing from a canon... I see no possible downside to this...
he really has nothing to lose at this point whereas Howard Dean did that before Iowa.
...
Let's be honest though, this would dominate headlines for days.
t would have to be tandem -- and the visuals for that are bad it's so damn awkward looking.
Still, "Sanders gives major political address from top of tree outside venue" is a fun headline.
He should jump into a gorilla enclosure. Maybe he'd get more coverage then.
That was when he said white people didn't know what being poor was like
>clinton rigs it
>dead
More like:
fucking awesome, tell us more about working on a campaign
Yeah because he would be ripping on his socialized parachute and plastic cutlery would fly out.
>writing off skydiving as a business expensive
classic bernie
>Trump jumping 30 school buses on a motorcycle
Wouldn't that break his campaign promise?
Too soon.
Just realized that Bernie used all his campaign money to check things off his bucket list before he dies. Bernouts literally funded the accomplishment of an old man's dreams.
Space jews from space!
>Bernie Sanders Sky Dives in to his speech and lands perfectly in front of the podium.
>The first thing he says is, "Hillary Clinton is weak and crooked!"
> CNN, Fox, MSNBC, Al Jizzera are all shooting it live on air. They're fucking flabbergasted.
> Bernie wins the popular vote
Especially (hopefully!) if he goes kerplunk
>Bernie wins the popular vote
And still loses because of super delegates.
Top kek
tbqh this seems like something that trump will do senpai
I hope he BERNS up in the atmosphere.
>He should jump into a gorilla enclosure. Maybe he'd get more coverage then
Then the gorilla would get shot and he'd lose even more of the black vote.
Oh man i hope to god his parachute gets tampered with. I want him to splat in a beautiful gory mess on stage. Bernouts would kill themselves if this happened it'd be lovely.
A bit weak, friend.
>Bernie has a heart attack doing this and dies on the way down
>Somehow lands into a fire
What else did he do?
5/10. Try a bit harder, Carlos.
...
Perfect opportunity for Hillary to add another name to her list
>Trump Rally
>Everyone cuts to Trump Rally because Trump Rally.
LOW ENERGY carLOSER
>give me your $100 million shekels, goys
>oh, don't worry, funding my geriatric skydiving endeavors will surely improve my chances of winning the nomination
F-feel t-the b-b-bern!
I hope he skydives from a helicopter.
Please do this, Bernie. You would be an international laughing stock.
after raking in all that commie cash, i did not expect him to consider suicide.
>skydive a 74y/o cuck
>what could go wrong
Have you seen his flight menu? Pretty fucking luxurious if you ask me.
>Hillary has it rigged so it doesn't open
>Sanders craters like fucking Wile E. Coyote with an anvil in his chute pack
>Hillary has a debilitating stroke a week later
>gets to sit in an old folks home basting in her own shit and piss watching Trump get inaugurated on TV
>Bill divorces her, marries Monica and fucks off into the sunset
>the world enters it's second golden age with Emperor Donald I at the helm
Geeze it would really be a shame if there was some WIND
Won't happen.
Too dangerous to skydive into a crowd full of people, probably near buildings and shit.
Is the parachute worth 1000 plus delegates?
I can tell you that being in the room with the candidate and family and a computer, on election night, collecting data as the polls close, is one HELL of a lot more fun when you are winning.
Oh, had lunch one time with the lead consultant I did most of my work for, and a black politician who had been an active Democrat all his life, but who this campaign was switching sides because the Ds had nominated a guy he couldn't stand.
So the talk turns to ballot security, and then these guys have to start dick-sizing about ballot shenanigans they've gotten up to in the past.
"One thig you better watch out for, we have this trick where we'll wedga a pathcstick into the contact where the curtain rolls back after voting, so you can leave the booth, and the matchstick blocks the connection so the vote is not counted."
"Well, shit, we knew you were doing thet, so we'd send in guys to pull the matchstick and jimmy this little lever here, and the machin would stop registering Straight Party votes." (In black boxes, straight party votes are about 100% D)
"Shit, we knew all about that, so we disconnected that little lever when the polls opened, then shifted the pens over to where any R votes wound up for the Democrat one race over..."
And so on for 30 minutes.
Possibly as much as 50% of it was real.
I also recall chasing dome ballot boxes up in the mountains -- very rural area, no voting machines yet at that time, and three precincts in the ounty. When the poll closed, the Sherrif's guys would stop by each polling place and bring the padlocked boxes back to city hall to be opened and counted. Only one set of boxes, from the more Republican precinct,never came in. So we got out guys in the country out driving around looking for where the damn ballot boxes might have been dumped. Got a call, "Hey, over in Sherrif X's Uncle Billy's barn we got some ballot boxes here!" They bring 'em in, the vote coutners open them up -- they are from two elections previously.
Why the fuck did he even meet with the Pope anyways?
That shit came off as being so desperate.
When did he promise not to jump 30 buses on a motorcycle?
...
>And still loses because of super delegates.
Who can all change their minds, remember.
It would take a lot of balls for the first one to cross over an d risk Clintonian Wrath. But if a couple of them went, and Bernie was looking strong after winning CA, the race would be on.
None of them will switch to help Bernie lose by slightly less, but if they could hand him the win...?
I'm sure that's exactly how all the kids who threw their only money at Bernie want it spent.
>canned food tier
>Luxerious
Ok
Also i was tracking that but other than the parajump and menu? Not the sports car because that is being disputed if i remeber correctly
...
kek how old are you
invader zim launched when I was 8 so thats a strange image to use
...
COME OOOOOOOOOOON DOUBLE CHUTE FAILURE!!!!
Even if you are being sarcastic, you're not wrong.
I'm in my 50's Broyhill/Sanford and boxes with paper ballots, even up in the mountain counties, were some time back.
i remember when there were like 1000 fansites of it and all the teenagers at school were wearing zim shoes
>implying Bernie dying WITHOUT endorsing Hillary is bad for Trump
That would be a 9/11 tier meme. The gifs from that would never end.
Wow, can't wait to see him try landing as he breaks his frail old man ankles.
This is obviously a marketing stunt by that skydiving company
Why is Sup Forums so dumb
God damn user, I kek'd heartily
>The skydiving outlet is paid by Hillary to sabotage the jump and have Bernie fall to his death on live TV
>Play up the tragedy as a loss to the "entire democratic party"
>an attempt to coddle and comfort the Bernie supporters in the name of solidarity against Trump
>mfw when Bernie pisses himself on the way down and cannot hide it behind the podium
Trump should do this with some illegals
He won't fly so good.
>they are from two elections previously
Man that's great. I love behind the scenes stories like that you never get to hear.
...
Hillary has probably hired a bunch of thugs to rig his parachute by this point.
A U T I S M
U
T
I
S
M
>missing the signal joke.
But yes if he dies its a win.
I was talking to a friend who has worked the other side of the fence, out west, about maybe doing a book, Not sure we have enough material, though. We'd have to avoid damaging former or current clients, and that would mean "filling the serial numbers" off of a lot of stories to the point where they would be just generic "and then some crazy shit went down, if I could tell you you'd be amazed" tier. Plus it would hurt both of us with new clients going forward. Maybe when we're retired...
But people have no idea what goes on, both the shady stuff and just the day-to-day stuff of running a campaign.
Bernie Sanders more like Bernie Splatters....
Front page of reddit after his parachute fails:
>Huff Post thinks Clinton rigged it
>Guys we still have a chance!
>MATCH ME, WE STILL GOTTA PHONE BANK!
>And tonight, ladies and gentlemen, Donald Trump will be entering the debate by jumping a ten foot wall on a dirtbike
>crowd goes wild
>DJT spends a little while revving up, goes the the jump and beefs it completely, hitting the wall
>crowd silent with fear
>the real DJT comes in from backstage
>"Who ever said walls don't work? Let's have a round of applause for our stuntman!"
This.
Ol barney is gonna get schlonged by crooked killary