Hey Sup Forums

Hey Sup Forums,
You look stressed? Somethin' botherin' you tonight? What can I get ya? Name's Ben, I'm the bartender here. I can make you anything you want! So, what'll it be?

Other urls found in this thread:

youtube.com/watch?v=2XK-nlGfh78
youtube.com/watch?v=ekZTW2r4vb4
twitter.com/SFWRedditGifs

rubbing alcohol and acetone

fuck you ben, i feel fantastic

cyanide

Gimme a fat cock

either that or ben

Piscola

gimmie da pusy b0ss

We carry both here, sir. Which would you like?
Ahh the cyanide, we do have a small pint left. A double shot I assume?
Well, that's great! But ahh, I'll take the first part as a compliment. Sure I can't get you anything?

Yo Ben! You got a secret stash of brisk fruit punch?

I had one earlier, can't remember what the guy called it. I think he said it was like a Caipirinha. Tasted like lime, but it was really good. Anyways, I'm interested in this chick, and while I'm not 100% sure, I'm pretty sure she wants to fuck. Only thing is I'm super insecure about my body and dick.

I'll have scotch. Clean as useal

Here you are sir, nice dubs by the way!
I know how to make a mean pisco sour if you wanna try that tonight, sir!
Here's your drink sir! Well in my experience I've always just rolled with it, there's a strong possibility she's just as insecure. Feel it out, the situation that is, then go with what feels right!

Any preference? We carry most brands here.

I definitely whatever hes having

rum and coke, please

Hmm you sound a bit like you had too much sir. I'm going to have to cut you off for now. Sorry! Bar policy.

2 liter of coke and bottle for rum. I need to not feel feelings right now

Moscow Mule, good sir. Sucks about those kids.

you're literally a fucking homosexual ben

>2 liter of coke and bottle for rum. I need to not feel feelings right now
are you me?

Thanks Ben! I haven't had one of these in awhile. They don't sell them in Canada anymore.

Comin right up guys!
Indeed it is. came on the bar television. Nearly made all the guests sick, what a world. your drink will be up in a minute!
To be honest sir, I am a straight male.

Sailor Jerry's? I believe Ben knows what he's doing.

Yes Ben I would like two shots of Jack Daniels and a bottle of wine to go please

Can I have an obligatory nude 10 year old girl, Ben?
Also a glass of Tanqueray, straight, if you please.

user ordered him a gin and a cheese pizza, Ben

Nice to see ya barkeep! Like the ol fashioned shot of Jack and the house beer.

Here's your two shots sir and I'd be happy to sell a bottle to you! Red or white? Age?
The Comet ping pong place is down the street sir, i think you are looking for that bar.

> i can make you anything you want
Make me feel loved plz

Devil trips getting thirsty down here.

Here's your shot of Jack and beer! Our house beer is a rich mellow stout with coffee hints and a bit of espresso. Enjoy!
Tell me what's going on user.

Hey Ben.
Yea, just heard on the news about ANOTHER MASS SHOOTING in the states. Pretty upset over it. I mean, when are those dumb fuck Amerilards going to get it right. Their whole country is fucked up on guns; it's almost like first world Syria over there. Mind you, it's going third-world and fast.
Makes you glad to be an Australian, doesn't it Ben. I mean, we have it quite comfy over here without having to worry about being blow to shit the moment we step out the door. Any way mate, can I get a beer - I'll drink to those poor victims at the school.
*gulp*
Just a matter of time you know UNTIL ANOTHER MASS SHOOTING

Sorry sir, didn't see ya there! what would you like?
Yeah, seems to be the talk of the bar tonight. I try to stay away from those types of issues. I try and respect all views. Very sad though, my heart goes out to the families. Here's a long trail IPA, you'll like this one, sir!

Black and Tan mate. Any good music in the jukebox?

Here you are. The jukebox is digital, we've got just about every tune! Put on anything you'd like!

Do you have anime openings/endings too? There are some really sweet tunes I have in mind right now.

Ben, I want you to make sure you get some good rest. I dropped in out of curiosity and this place looks pretty cool. Have a goodnight boys.

Hey Ben it's cool if I'm in here right i mean I'm 19 but i won't drink anything

I could use a white russian, man

Shot of Royal and a shot of cold press coffee extract. LETS FUCKING DO THIS!

Hey Ben, could you get me a glass of Budweiser?

ehh was craving a vodka sunrise earlier, i'll take one of those.

Yes, anything that you can find on youtube i believe. haha.
Thank you sir, shifts over at 2 so, i'm here for a bit longer.
Yes, we are a pub also, may I show you the menu?
Coming up sir! Here you are.
Coming right up my man!
Tall or short Budweiser sir?

I would personally like it if you put on the song "What's New Pussycat" if that's alright, and maybe "It's Not Unusual" as well.

Tall my man, and keep em coming. Y'all got a bathroom in here?

Torn calf, got binned from a selection course for my unit because of it, have to leave all my mates there. I can try again in a year but my only option is to go to a shit unit and grizz it out. Also tfwnogf.

Alright, gonna blast this on max volume then youtube.com/watch?v=2XK-nlGfh78

Sick trips

That means we all have to actually play the song.

One jack daniels please on the rocks. I know I look young I get that a lot.

I'll have a waitress put the song on sir, i'm busy here haha. How many drinks have you had tonight? just wondering user.
Here you are sir. Yes bathroom is down the left there beside the dining hall entrance.
That's too bad user. just gotta keep going! Make sure to keep in touch with your buddies!

GIVE ME SOME FUCKING COKE BEN!!!

I've only had a couple glasses of Fireball, but I'm a lightweight so it might be affecting me more than I care to admit.

Don't worry about that bathroom thing Ben, I am afraid to inform you though you may need to get another stool

>Be me
>Realize the fake bartender forgot my order.
>Pretend like I'm not upset.
>Backs out of Bar/Thread stealthily
>Accidentally make eye contact with the bartender
>Oh fuck, he knows I'm seething with anger at him
>Dissapear

youre not the only one my friend.
... lets disappear together

Yeah actually. Something from my past is nagging at me, but I dont know why.

Hey man, wanna go to a Spiderman bread?

Hey Ben, I want a suicide of every liquor you've got, and for a chaser I want a suicide of all the beer.

>1 shot ruby red
>1 shot cranberry
>2 shots Hornitos
>lime squeeze
>club soda to top of 16oz glass

Play this when you're leaving bois
youtube.com/watch?v=ekZTW2r4vb4

We already left, my dude.

Hey, isn't Metallica going to sue youtube for that?

Man Ben, you sure are a shitty bartender

Cheers ben, just gotta work it out. Give me a laphraig on the rocks if youve got it.

Ikr

Oh yeah, ill have an Old Fashioned.

Well, I'm going to have to cut you off after a couple more shots user.
Comin up sir. May i ask what's peckin at ya?Comin up sir!
Boom! here you are sir! one of my personal favorites.
gotta love it user!
Hey guys i don't appreciate that kind of talk here in my bar. i try every night to make everyone here happy! what will you two be having?

one year ago i proposed to my ex. she left me 2 months later. now im with a girl who loves me more than anyone ever has and treats me right, but im still sad about my ex leaving. make me a bottle of bourbon.

Sure, I think it has to do with stuff that happened years ago. Three particular events stand out. Something about them is nagging at me but I cant figure out what.

Can this be a discord and someone make a ben bot

My gf broke up with me today. Surprise me.

Sweet vermouth, on the rocks, with a twist, please.

Man, did you spike this drink with anything?

post her nudes, need dat OC ass
if she has tattoos don't post though

"digital hug"

Coming up sir. One GLASS of our nicest bourbon
Hmmm. I'd suggest maybe consulting a therapist? someone you can talk to and build a bond. i've been to them before and honestly, got a lot of stuff off of my back.
I'll leave that up to someone more technically inclined. I just make the drinks!
Here's something to start, let's get it popping! how about a nice vodka soda?
Coming right up!!
No, i didn't sir, haha. But to be honest, i DID see someone fiddling with it. let me get you another on the house.

I'm getting tired of getting tired of finding that there's more track ahead. It's doing things to me I can't even describe or change. I'm just along for the ride that I keep thinking is over.

A tumbler of your strongest bitters, nothing else.

Can i get a glass of milk and some steam keys

I want to just pack a backpack and drive. Just keep driving until I get tired then I'll sleep in a Walmart parking lot of some shit. No particular destination, just wandering until I run out of money. I'll have to find a short term job to save up money for a few months then hit the road again.

i feel just angry tonight ben, got anything for that?

comin up!
got the milk, no steam keys though?
maybe it'll be good for you! do it if you can do it comfortably.
punching bag game over there in the corner hahaha. I'll fix ya a nice whisky to calm your nerves, sir.

You look stressed? Somethin' botherin' you tonight?
I just want to escape my problems, but am not really doing that, like most people.

>What can I get ya?
Gin an tonic, and then 5 of your most expensive drink.

>and drive.
Me, too. Except I want to drive fast, on technical and twisty roads, with no traffic on said roads, and sometimes I want to kick out the tail end or 4 wheel drift.

Hey, Ben. I need me some big ol' nigger dick. got any of that for me?

Ice water please and thank you.

2 shots of tequila, fruit lunch, and Nyquil for flavor

Bartender on an off night, I'll take an Old Pal or if you have Green Chartreuse I'll do a Bijou instead. Round two we can do a shot of Fernet Branca together.

a shot of fernet in a rocks glass and a pilsner

Man, I hope you're trolling. Thanks for the laughter. Can't remember how may times I've seen le fedoras sitting at the bar.

Just some whiskey and some 9mm bullets tonight, Ben.

Eh, rude. I'll go to my usual spot instead. You know how this industry works.

We've got what you need user!
Just... not inebriated.
*calls bouncer over*
comin up!
2 shots comin at ya!
sounds good user! coming right up!
good choices user comin up!
Hahaha, that's dark user!. *writes number on knapkin* *does phone motion*

just a water, thanks

1 liter of potassium chloride. On the rocks

here you are. extra cold!
nice dubs sir! hmm a liter is a lot. lets start with a glass.

LAST CALL EVERYONE!!

Thanks a hunnit, Ben. Let's see if she actually picks up.

Mix me 1 part hoegarden and 1 part framboi in a 22 oz and accompany that with a shot of Jameson. On the rocks.

Bourbon , neat anyways Ben and anyone else what values / moral do you think people need more of these days ? What problems do people have that you believe we should be looking at ?