No survival thread? How would you live off the land?

No survival thread? How would you live off the land?

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files.diydharma.org/other/John_Seymour-The_Complete_Book_of_Self_Sufficiency.pdf
lowes.ca/bath/toilets-and-bidets/toilets/type/composting/?s_kwcid=composting toilets|248338061916&af=3638&gclid=EAIaIQobChMIpPnEoJO12QIVgYB-Ch37XQRJEAAYASAAEgKH9_D_BwE&gclsrc=aw.ds
fema.gov/media-library-data/1448917365279-3a7949605bd9e03633af2473a5741aa9/Section_0_PM_Combined.pdf
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Grow a garden for starters

What fruit and veggies?

Said garden not an orchard.

>No survival thread? How would you live off the land?
Oh fuck is this getting reposted every two hours, now?? FUCK OFF WITH THE PASTA

Fruit can grow in gardens.

Potatoes, carrots, raddishes, cabbage... generally shit that is hard to fuck up.
Fresh raddiahes are fucking delicious btw

peanuts are the only “fruit” that grows underground.

Better than rate my dick pics and log threads.

/thread

I'd eat animals I'd caught and plants I'd found. Then I'd drink water I found and live in a shelter I'd built.

Tomatoes grow in gardens

Sounds easy

Can u grow pasta in gardens?

Fuck that you vegan motherfuckers, have fun dying from b12 def. You bitches can stay at home and tend to your little carrots, I'm going out to hunt and fish with ma yew bow and stone-tipped spear. and when the women see how i kill things they'll get so wet I'll never have to worry about dehydration

In a rigid airship.

I would invite my uncles to join me for companions. Nights would be a little less cold.

The pasta plant only grows in Zone IV. It's not frost resistant. They are heterozygous, so you have to have at least 20 plants or it won't bear pasta fruit. Set aside 1/4 of the plants to harvest the seeds for your next crop. You'll need a fence because niggers will steal it.

You have experience as a bowyer and string-fellow?

How about a wall

Wtf are you talking about?! Everyone knows pasta grows on trees

Yes my good sir, I was a scout for 10 years, none of that religious shit tho, here we don't stand for that. Pure outdoorsmanship

1 acre per person for garden. 2 acres for orchard, apple and peach. Goats for meat and milk. Chickens for eggs. Grow cucumbers, potatoes, cabbage, carrots, peppers, onions and tomatoes. Corn for cornmeal. Herb garden, basil, oregano, mint, thyme, sage, rosemary. Still and press for liquor and wine.

Fake and gay. Pasta plant is a climbing vine.

The ideal situation would be to learn how to build or get some help building a decent log cabin, preferably near a decent body of water with rivers near by. Hunt and fish and start storing food. Build the cabin and an outhouse. Start a garden for fruits and veggies inside of a greenhouse so i can grow yea round. Build a decent size barn so i can house livestock, few goats, cows, chickens, pigs ect. Get a wood stove and live the dream. Reminder that this would be illegal unless you own the land and pay taxes (bullshit). It would be nice to not have to be a member of society. To be able to wake up and tend to your garden and livestock. Going out for a hunt or fishing to get some dinner. Improve the property as much as possible and just live life. after a hard days work just hang in front of the fire place wich is not really needed if you have a woodstove but a fireplace makes it so cozy. you can also get hot water by running a copper coil around the stack so you could take hot showers or just bath in the river. i hate living in society, shits so fucking overrated. we need to get people together who want to opt out and build small self sustaining communities, fuck this country shit. it's all to control us and keep us as basically slaves, we need to get out of this shit.

Not that you fags are willing to read a fucking book but a guy named John Seymour wrote the definitive guide to homesteading in the 70's. It's a good read, it's basically a technical manual for how to do anything. How to teach a baby calf to suck? slaughter, dress, and butcher a pig? Crop rotation? Build a house? Irrigate a field? Identify pests and diseases? Grow and orchard? It's all there.

files.diydharma.org/other/John_Seymour-The_Complete_Book_of_Self_Sufficiency.pdf

honestly it does not even need to be a log cabin, you could just buy lumber and build something cozy. cabin are just nice because when they are built right they are very efficient.

No it has to be an underground dwelling preferably chiseled in stone. Colder summers, milder winters

Fake, there is a picture of it attacked. Do you have a picture? No? Case closed

What are you all even pretending to be doing? Pasta is a seaweed, why do you think cities in italy are near the coast?

>implying you want to survive the nuclear world war.

How do you drain sewage water indawoods?

Septic tank. It's pretty simple.

Yeah but then you need it pumped out when its full and in the wilderness far from roads that wont work.

its called an outhouse you cunts

Depends on how big your septic tank is. Big enough and it'll break down fast enough that it won't fill for a really long time. The effluent has to go to a field, but that's a different matter.

this was good

I want a toilet inside my cabin. Outhouse have no heating and im not going out to take a shit in -30 weather.

Composting toilet. They do work, but having to divert the woman's pee so you don't ruin everything is a pain and she won't do it. Invest in a sex doll.

I would build a homemade centrifuge to separate plasma from the blood of people I capture, and I could inject the plasma directly into my veins and just live like that I guess I don't see why not right

Keep doing what I'm doing now, hunting and fishing. I'll let the wife handle the garden.

Do u use a rod or net?

lowes.ca/bath/toilets-and-bidets/toilets/type/composting/?s_kwcid=composting toilets|248338061916&af=3638&gclid=EAIaIQobChMIpPnEoJO12QIVgYB-Ch37XQRJEAAYASAAEgKH9_D_BwE&gclsrc=aw.ds

Thanks for the pdf, might be a bit outdated on some parts but seems interesting

Like for sustenance? That's metal as fuck. You would make a great road warrior.

Like this.

In this case outdated may not be the most accurate term. The techniques in the book are more or less timeless. Most of it is based on pre-industrial european high farming. The content on cooking, crafting, beekeeping, animal husbandry, cheesemaking, etc. is also still relevant. It's stuff that worked for millennia and will work for millennia more. The only thing that I would say is a bit outdated is the sections on power generation. Also one thing to mention is that John Seymour wasn't a loner and didn't do this shit out in the woods, he believed people need other people and having this farm just makes you another member of the community. I will say all the things in the guide are also more or less designed for idyllic English countryside but the majority of the lessons still apply to most regions unless you live in a particularly extreme environment.

It's a cool book. Saved. Thanks for sharing user.

Very cool.

First, wall it off. I own 20 acres, if I wall off 5 of it, I have a defensible perimeter. I have the equipment to do it as well. Second, I install an air pressure system with a few 500 gallon tanks filled with pressurized air from a windmill. I can build one for about 1500 bucks and can adapt my workshop with it. Then I farm. Outside the wall, I have a 100 foot border before it hits the trees, that is where my goats will graze and can raise a crop, preferably quinoa. I can milk the goats and make butter and cheese too. Inside the wall, I make a greenhouse for veggies that can be stored through canning. I also raise chickens for eggs and baseline meat. finally, I get a beehive. Other animals to include; 2 dogs for hunting, 2 cats for mice and snakes. Pigs for scrap removal and the yearly christmas meal. I have guns. I can reload ammo until i run out of supplies. the last thing i would want is technical manuals of literally every kind.

Would you bring a kindle or boxes of books?

thank you man, pretty usefull

im laying logs down to rot, letting the fungus spread through the soil. bringing it new life. this was old agricultural land that's why it was so cheap. modern farming is a menace. it will take years to get where I want to be put I have made tremendous progress. quite a lot grows already in my permaculture

Books. Always books.

Not what you're talking about, but I've looked into mushroom farming as well. (Not those kinds of mushrooms kids.) It's pretty simple and can work year round with a greenhouse.

mushrooms and all types of fungus are great and regenerative for your soil. there are a good sign

tasty as well

If you are interested in some pretty comprehensive disaster stuff you can always take CERT training. Depending on where you live CERT programs vary in quality but the training and equipment are always free. Here's a clusterfuck of information, some of it is very good, some of it is very basic.

fema.gov/media-library-data/1448917365279-3a7949605bd9e03633af2473a5741aa9/Section_0_PM_Combined.pdf

Not often talked about, but cisterns are a real thing that should be studied by anybody hoping to go off grid.

that's adorable. too bad the dimensions are all fucked.

Sorry to same fag but there is some dark shit in there. CBRN stuff is pretty gnarly. Instructions on setting up mass morgues. Guides to how to inform survivors that their loved ones died. Triage is pretty brutal, lots of instructions on when to just let people die. The proper way to mark the front door of searched houses with number of living and dead found inside.

The book is full of weird illustrations. They convey the information accurately but the illustrator was clearly not very good.

thank you I know know how to teacha calf to suck

You have to lead by example.

Pasta plant here. AMA

...

Use that knowledge for good and not evil.

...

lol. In reality you have to insert two fingers into the calves mouth and guide its head into the bucket till it's lips touch the milk. It can take multiple tries but eventually the calf can learn to drink directly from the bucket unassisted allowing you to partition milk for yourself and still allow the calf to grow up big and strong.

Thanks dude, didn't expect something that might actually be useful

my favorite part is the assumption you will have a river running through your 1 acre.

Yea, alot of guides and information about this stuff comes from people sitting behind a computer fantasizing about going of the grid but never doing it. Having a legitimate comprehensive authoritative source on the materiel is refreshing.

You know the book talks about where to settle based on the watershed? Also teaches you how to sink wells. I think the artist was trying to portray an idyllic self sustaining farm. That's why everything is portrayed as so cozy.

Pasta plant again. I'll take the initiative
Yes, but not how you might think. I will explain later in post.
We've actually grown hardier over the years. You're right in that we don't hold to frost very well but as long as we're within the 35th parralel north or south of the equator, we tend to do just fine. You make me blush at the idea that we still bear fruit. You're thinking of my great great, great? grandfather, Riggogetti IV. Africans have all the tools and none of the know-how to grow us, but I'm pretty sure niggers are gay because they only go for our males and unassigned pastas.
You're both right, and wrong. See, land-based pastas are actually fairly delicate. While we do grow on trees and we are a vine, we don't climb, and we don't actually come from the tree itself. We're more prone to catching in the wind as our vines dangle down from the branches. Really our evolution was painfully slow until the hanging gardens in Babylon. Cultural diffusion brought us to Rome and we had what you might call a baby boom. We soon evolved to grow in captivity. I will attach a picture of myself from last summer.
There are a few species of pasta which are in fact seaweeds. Land and sea based pastas have a common ancestor as recent as 45,000 years ago. The two diverged with the sea pasta becoming more widespread for reasons explained earlier. Their evolution was slow though as man could not cultivate them to much effect. Ours was much faster, but we had to wait almost the whole of that 45000 years to really florish. It is said that the discovery of sea pasta led to the shift from greece to rome, but my history on that is rather spotty, sorry to say.

oops forgot picture. I'm really coming into my own.

just a simple pasta wrangler

Hey, a simple life is often a good one. That's why we have survival threads, yes? I'm trying to learn your human culture, and while I don't really appreciate the log and dick rate threads a previous poster mentioned, I am quite partial to the 'pics you have but shouldn't share' threads.

This is a picture of my mother when she was cheating on my father. I hate nightshades so goddamn much.