Good evening, user. What's up? You feeling sad? Need a hug?

Good evening, user. What's up? You feeling sad? Need a hug?

Let's talk.

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Bump.

Haven't seen you around here in a while

I posted one on tuesday, I think.

I am a little sad user. Life is difficult right now. But I at least hope everyone else is doing okay.

It is okay to be sad. Life can be very hard sometimes. Most of the people I know are doing pretty well right now, as far as I can tell. You have a good heart, user.

My friend and suitemate said something as a joke that I took the wrong way. Haven't talked to him in 3 months. Makes things weird when pass by him.
He said hi to me once in passing but I didn't do anything.
What should I do?

If you're the one who took it the wrong way, then it's probably only weird for you. Next time you see him, acknowledge him and talk to him normally. Try to get back together with him. No sense in letting a good friend slip away over something little like that.

...

Cute.

I forgot to mention i fucking love this movie. Thank you user.

> ESAI HARAMASUKOI

We'd been friends for 5 years, did sports together, went to same uni. The past few years I started feeling like I was a bad person (and friend) and people shouldn't be friends with me.
When this happened I figured he didn't want to be friends anymore since he hasn't said anything. I figured if he cared he might have said something.
I don't want to waste his time bringing it up if it's true he doesn't care.

It's a fun movie.

Good mug. Looks a little delicate around the bottom. Where can I get one?

I'm finishing up in highschool, turned 18 recently, but I've developed a fear of writing that's almost phobic.
I don't know how to deal with this.
I'm bombing most of my classes because I can't fix it. I'm even seeing a therapist, trying to do alternative work methods, but the fact that I can no longer write formal shit for school is fucking with me hard.
What else do I do?
How can I make this better?

Is it the fear of presenting your work or the act itself, if i may ask? Also i am not OP.

Maybe he cares, but he might not track you down and force you to start caring about him again. From his perspective, it may look like you stopped caring. If you take the initiative and start talking to him again I think you can reignite the friendship.

Have you tried doing freewrites? Put the pencil on the paper and write literally anything for five minutes before you try to write for real. It helps me a lot.

Might be true.
He was the last friend I had left, similar things had happened to the rest.
It'll probably happen again so I think I'll just leave it be and hope everyone forget.
Probably better that way.

In that case, it is definitely worthwhile to try to get him back again. I think it would not be that difficult, and you would benefit greatly from talking to him regularly again. You will only do harm to yourself and him by letting the friendship die inconclusively and without a good reason like this.

It's hard to describe. I guess it's primarily the second.
I just end up feeling like the worst person on the planet.
And just disgusted with myself, because I know, or at least feel like my writing isn't the best I can do. It makes me physically ill to think of turning it in.
And when I start writing I almost immediately have a panic attack.
It's something that's been getting worse and worse since freshman year, and this year it's come to its absolute worst.
I've been trying to do that a bit when I can. I've been progressing a little bit, but my progress has stopped recently.
Just always am only able to write a paragraph or two then it messes with me so badly that I have to go be sick.

I think it'd probably do more harm to him, having to put up with me, than it'd benefit me. I haven't hung out with anyone in a few months now, only ~3 times the past few years.
I'm getting used to not having any friends, don't have any online ones either.
I wouldn't want to waste his time or anything, that's more important to me than how I feel.

Man, that's bad. I've never heard of that before. I wish I had a word of advice, but I'm lost there. Sorry.

You tell yourself that, but if someone hangs out with you willingly it isn't the case. You can't make his decisions for him without even presenting him any options. You should talk to him, you should become friends again, and you should try to get out more and start seeing more people. It's being alone that leads to this kind of attitude, which will not cause any good things.

I always felt I got invited to things out of pity.
They told me the thought I was a good person and a good friend, but I can't believe it.
I've had this altitude even when I did have friends, I just felt guilty about having people associated with me like that. Might be presumptuous, but I'd feel bad if they worried about me or cared.

You're being presumptuous and uncharitable. It's typically best to assume that people's sentiments are genuine- to do otherwise would be to essentially straight up not believe them, which is not very kind.

hey

Hello again

It's not that I don't believe they're genuine, it's just that I can't understand why they'd think that about me.
I don't think I'm a good person/friend and it doesn't make sense to me why they'd think otherwise.

Hello.

How've you been?

You can't understand everything. You may have to settle for just letting it happening without being able to wrap your head around why. Some things are that way.

You are in no way exceptionally worse than the rest of us. Don't get all high and mighty with me, thinking you're more terrible than anyone. You're alright, man. You're good in my book.

Things have been really hard lately to be honest. I met someone who seemed like the real thing - we talked about moving in together and getting married and then things got so complicated. He told me he cares less and less every day but still loves me and that our problems aren't things that can be solved with a conversation. I am trying so hard to give him space because being near him with him not showing much affection is killing me. I don't know what to do.

Doing ok. Did some free form art doing what comes to mind while trying to make the picture balanced.

If he won't talk about it, you can't talk about it. Is there someone else he can talk about it with? Is there someone else you both know that you could talk about it with?

That's cool. Can I see?

I'm not that edgy, claiming I'm the worst.
I just see that I have flaws, and I've done stupid things in the past that bothered people. Ever since I realized that, I stopped trying to make new friends, and let old friendships fade away.
I've been able to handle it so far, so I think it's better to not be a burden on others.

Wish I can help but I got no experience with relationships other then the negatives.

I made this a few days ago. I know its really abstract. I will post some others soon.

Now this might be a long stretch, and I mean REALLY long... but have you considered an open relationship ?

If you claim that you are a bad person you still have standards that you set yourself with. Terrible people don't have standards.

Here is another. More empty but I like this one, reminds me of mars from watchmen.

user, we all have flaws. Some of us have really big flaws, but that's not important. We've all done things in the past that have bothered people. I've done a lot of those things. Too many to count. Some of them, I remember often and cringe, because I can hardly bear to think about them. But nobody remembers your past transgressions. 90% of the annoying and stupid things you've done have been forgotten. You can't remember the stupid things other people did years ago, can you?

Dude, that's awesome. Is that acrylic paint?

It's the colors that are important in that one. I like it. Almost feels like there should be a naked blue guy sitting there, dunno why.

hey flan how's it going

Pretty okay user, hbu?

Oh sure, I definitely have standards for myself.
I wouldn't say I think I'm terrible. Maybe that I think I'd rather fix my flaws before intruding into other people's lives to try and be friends.
That's a good point, and I agree with it, but I don't want to live like that any more. If that's what friendship is, it's not worth me feeling like shit.

Good, nice to see you back

But once you have some good friendships, you have some people who can build you up, who will keep you from feeling like this. What you're feeling now should not be the status quo. This is the bottom of the pit. You need to climb up and start believing in the good things, so you can feel good about yourself.

Dat's good. I'll be here for a while.

This is dumb and I'm dumb but I have to say it
My boyfriend doesn't seem like hes into having sex with me. I have a much higher sex drive than he does and I talked to him about it before asking for it more often but if I try to initiate he just isn't in the mood, which really kills my self esteem.
He works a really hard at his job, (we both work but his is a labor job) I know its not cheating he is just exhausted, but it always makes me feel so shitty.
This is the other retarded part, I can't really masturbate successfully so I'm stuck waiting for him to be in the mood.

I dunno, I think I've already been there. Even when I did have a few friends that I really cared about, and vice versa, and I didn't have any problems, just couldn't shake the fact that I wasn't good enough.
What's wrong with being alone?
I used to be lonely for a while, but I got over it.

Is it any better on weekends? That kind of sucks and I'm sorry to hear it, user. I wouldn't wish that problem on anyone.

Now I need to ask, do you go for asking, or initiating ?

And have you tried various sex toys, or just one ?

Are you happy?

I used a painting program, Painter essentials 5. I like it but a 6th one is out now. Also used my waco drawing pad for it. I see it as practice when I use real paint which I sometimes do.

I see your point but you shouldn't push away others. They can help find who you are and fix you. I understand about not finding new ones but don't push away the old. If you have to at least tell them why.

I'm a 20yr old neet who lives at home with his mom while my dad works overseas I overheard them talking and they said that it's depressing that I'm doing nothing with my life. I have ideas of what i think I want to do with my life but everytime I try to fulfill them I just stop. Overhearing my parents really hurt something inside me. Pls send virtual hugs I could use them thanks.

I'll dress up in some costumes we have or will be really suggestive but he seems to get mad if I get sad if he says no.
We used to do bondage but we haven't done that in a long time.
No other sex toys, we used to talk about that but it never comes up.

I have no clue if you remember me or not, but it's me. I said I had fallen in love with this girl but I was fucked for several reasons. Remember me?

ily
im also a disappointment

When I don't think about things like this, yes.
But I'm more content being lonely than being a burden.

thanks user. I just wish I could just brush it off and forget about it.
I can expect at least once on the weekend. He won't do it more than once a day.

*Gives an user hug*

Perhaps you should set a strict line for him saying that you want sex toys for your self pleasure, there's various toys that work miracles ! (I'm bi and have tried a few)... And please, don't pressure him like you do, with dressing up and suggesting sex you make him feel less comfortable because he can't cater to your wishes. That is probably where the anger stems from. I know you don't do it with evil intent, and he probably doesn't interpret it that way, but it seems to pressure him since he get's frustrated

Thanks for the hug.

Ahh, that's cool. I use Krita and a little bitty wacom tablet. All my stuff turns out messy though.

*hugs you tightly*

You have to grab something and stick to it, user. Latch onto a dream and start doing it, and then when you hit that point where you stop, don't stop.

I can't distinguish you based on the information you have given me. How are things now?

What if you could be a support and someone valued, and feel like you were also supported by people that you valued though? Do you feel that you could attain a better state than this? I encourage you to strive for something better, and to not resign yourself to being alone because you think you would be a burden to people.

That's a shame. It is kind of a big thing though. Is there any chance he'll be promoted and have less work to do?

Three times in the past 3 years, i have started work at jobs i love and excel at. Good, solid performance reviews. within my first year, they do a massive layoff and i get fucked. the unemployment is decent, but my wife and have nothing extra beyond food and bills. Its not like i don't apply to go other places for work either. Its just, whenever job offers go out, i usually go with the highest salary position and then the position disappears after 9 months. its wearing on my nerves and i want to have a kid. i'm in my upper 20's and my wife is almost 30. we are ready if i could just get a stable fucking job.

I never thought of it like that, I didn't want to pressure him I just wanted him to get excited to be with me.
I will probably get a toy, do you recommend anything? He expressed interest in watching but I might be too shy.

Maybe that will help

If he gets promoted it will likely be more work. He's not crazy about his job either and wants to go into another career. This is what kills me too is that whole situation is making him depressed and it seems like nothing I can do helps him.

I can't recommend much other than anthony vibes (It's a danish thing I think), but just let him watch perhaps, and then let him do the initiating. If he's cool with sex toys, you should be all set

That's awful, user. I don't even know what to say.

I don't even know. Are things any better now than they were then? What are your current problems?

I think that'd be nice, of course.
I think things can always be better than they are now.
But, I don't think it's worth it. I've already ruined a ton of friendships in the past, I went into new ones thinking I'd change things, but it was always the same result.
I'll probably just stick to myself and see how long I can last.

We don't really know the same people - the relationship is still so new. Maybe I could ask his friend to talk to him but I'm afraid that he might be offended by that... It's like I'm skating on thin ice with him, you know?

You just have to start doing things in small chunks each day. Work on a hobby like writing, drawing or even some sort of sport, although I will stay away from games as a hobby.

Turns out messy? Something wrong with the program or is the pen all messed up? Anyway I really like this one I made.

That fucking sucks. Getting a job is difficult even if your qualified for it. Only sure way to get a job is if you know somebody from the inside either from a friend or cause you volunteer someplace, but again volunteering isn't a sure fire way to land a job but it could get you noticed. Only other thing I can think of is self employment but that has risks all of its own.

I slipped in the shower and gave myself a mild concussion. I'm probably going to miss the college championships for my sport next week. I'm feeling pretty terrible about losing out on such a big opportunity from such a silly accident. My team will be less without me.

get a g-spot stimulator instead of a dildo. Dildos are phalic and do a great job of emasculating men, because its hard to find smaller dildos. G-spot stimulators, however, are curvy, bulbous and great for using in odd positions.

Why are all women uninterested in me?
>pic related its me

I've already talked about this briefly, but I'm developing feelings for a friend.
Both she and I have gf/bf, so nothing I can do, I like my gf, used to love her but not so sure anymore, she was always kind of hard to deal with, but recently she's been telling me she loves me.
I hate myself, I've been more distant to her and now she tells me, still she gets pissy at me for dumb stuff. And this other girl, well she's the total opposite, super comprehensive and caring, It also doesn't help that we're together at college all the time, my gf sadly lives 5 hours away.
I hate feeling this shit

Previously, I had said I love this girl, but one of my buddies likes her too. I've known her sense the 5th grade. I also said if I did made a move is hurt my friend. But if I didn't it would kill me to see her with someone else.


Now, my friend has claimed to have moved on but I'm not sure about that. And me and this girl have gotten closer but I don't think she really cares for me the same way.

Because you're not a skinhead

I'll try and get one, thanks.
If I let him do the initiating it sometimes takes more than a week. Is there something else I can do for now? Both with him and dealing with myself?
Honestly I had no sex ed class so a lot of this stuff I am learning from him. (and here now)
I need any kind of advice I can get.

are those the ones with the two things on there?
Are there some that vibrate? I feel like that is something that would be okay.

Have you thought about going to see a therapist? Maybe just him, or both of you together. Insurance might cover it. It's worth a look, could make a big difference.

Did you ruin them by actually doing things, or by just leaving after thinking that you had done something that destroyed them though?

I think it'd be worth a shot, but I don't know him either. Go with your own best judgement on this one.

No, I'm just not a very good artist. I like that one too. Reminds me of the little creatures from My Neighbor Totoro.

Man, that sucks. I guess there's not really anything that can be done about it though. Sorry user.

Probably because you spend so much time on Sup Forums.

If she's still with her boyfriend, stay away. Don't even consider breaking both relationships. If she were single, it'd be different. Wait. It sucks, but I think that's the best thing you can do right now.

If you're not sure she really has feelings for you, wait to see if he really did make that move, and encourage him to get on with it.

So what you're telling me is that they think I'm not trustworthy? Thanks

well, i have some contacts that can help me get set up for self-employment, as i used to work on contract for programming. I ran a successful business for 7 years, made great money too, but i couldn't handle the sitting around after a certain point. I have been working IT managment positions. 2 of the positions, i helped re-work the entire intranet they use to make it simpler to use and more secure and they laid-off my entire team after the project was finished. I found out later they then hired on some freshies out of college and paid them 20k less a year at the first place, and outsouced the jobs at the second.

Have a hug

Gtfo the thread

Thanks OP.
I'll try to make it more obvious of who I am next time

there are ones that vibrate, but its also a combination of how you move it against your g-spot.
get one like pic related for your first time. smaller and vibrates.
>adameve.com/adult-sex-toys/vibrators/g-spot-vibrators/sp-sinclair-select-body-blossom-12343.aspx

The only thing I can say is :

Sex is a thing of concience. It requires the moods and the settings to be just right. If you have a higher libido you can supress it through masturbating, or you might have to find someone else. But really, Thin out the options before you go looking.

I'd say your boyfriend is lowlibido, and that might be due to various reasons, it can be natural, it can be due to too much drinking... or it can be entirely different and be onsetting depression.

The most intricate part of sex is the feelings involved. Not in the attractioned manner, but in the "can I really trust this person?"-manner. I'm not saying he doesn't trust you, but perhaps you might have a few things you need to talk through with eachother. Just don't force him to do it, you wouldn't like if you were forced to either... give it time, and let it come around.

I was under the impression that I was just being a bother, so I did things like mute groupchats and make excuses why I can't hang out.

That's alright. As long as you make your current situation clear, the past is not so important.

Do you really think a therapist is necessary? For me or for him?

Yeah, that's a bad thing. You isolated yourself and refused to associate with people. When you do that, it might make them feel like you just don't want to hang out with them.

It may be more helpful for him. I think it would help a lot, with dealing with stress and depression, and the difference in your libidos.

I've thought about that before too.
I really want to tell them that it's not them, it's me. They didn't do anything wrong, it was just my and my insecurities. But I don't want to bring it up and make them have to take time out of their day to respond. My hope was that they didn't mind and they'd forget.
How are you supposed to tell someone you don't want to have friends anymore?

I would be open to masturbation before looking for anyone else. He is the one person I feel absolutely at home with and he told me he feels the same on different occasions.
I think that might be what really hurts, cause I feel that we can talk about anything, and we talk about a lot of fucked up stuff, but he doesn't express himself when he is sad often. There was a time when he was drinking quite a bit but we stopped bring alcohol into the place and he has been dry for a few weeks.
I know asking him whats wrong wont work cause I tried that. that's not he works. I guess I can leave him be and let him come to me?

I'm not that good at art either but I found a style for me that somewhat works. Some artists can't do certain things while they are good at others.

If you believe in fate maybe that prevented you from being hurt more severely someplace else. Anyway I feel bad for ya.

Good to hear you have contacts. Wish I can help you out more but I don't know much about programming or jobs surrounding that. Hope I gave you some ideas though.

this person here is right. I used to have a friend that I was vary close with and even told me his dark secrets. Then one day he just cut contact fro me, half a year later he shows up again and about 4 months after that he cuts contact with me again.

You can't really do that. You need to get over your insecurity and stop hurting people by refusing to be their friend and treating them improperly. Your inability to accept the fact that people might like you seems to be crippling. That needs to change.

Ah, I can do figures pretty well, but not much else. Digital art is very hard for me.

How do I even bring that up and get him to go? He sometime insists that I am the one that needs help and I probably could use it but he is not the type to seek this kind of treatment.

He probably has trust issues coming from a rough background, that's just me interpretting, but perhaps you should try and wait around, he'll open up eventually. But just recognize, it might take a LONG ass while... Otherwise I'd recommend what OP does, a therapist. If that was for you... I can't remember. But a therapist might be doing some good in the long run. The first times will seem futile, but he'll recognize the safe space when he gets adjusted

Any idea why he cut contact?
Shouldn't I work on fixing my own problems, then, before I try and be friends with people again?

You could ask him to go with you.

Some good friends will be able to help you fix your problems. Spending time with good people will cause you to become more like them. The good behavior and attitudes rub off on you. I'd be dead if I didn't have people to lean on at my lowest points.

this is shining a whole new light. I never would have thought any trust issues exist but you could be right. We have been together for almost 6 years now. What do I do at this point to gain his trust? I have a feeling this is more linked to his depression but is there something else I can try before therapist?

Maybe. He hardly leaves the house if he doesn't have to. But maybe.

The first time he claimed that I was too negative. Before I could respond to his message he cut contact. The second time I don't know. He never talked much, I always had to start the conversation first and it never lasted and he said he was always busy or tired to hang out. I think it didn't help the second last time I spoke to him I made a small political comment that was somewhat neutral in nature to start a conversation and he didn't like that at all and I would even say over react to it.

I tried once before to fix those problems, and I thought it'd work but it didn't last long. That was a few months ago.
Am I supposed to talk to other people about it or just let it go over time?
I've been trying really hard not to tell anyone.
That's a bummer, I can relate to those feelings.
I think this one's on him, but that's not the point.
What made you want to keep contacting him?
Both before and after the incidents?

If he suffers depression, I'd recommend you get him to see a therapist when he's ready for it. There's nothing you can do to gain his trust other than eating a couple of turds and showing you'll stick around. Depression, even though soft on the barometer, is a tough nut to crack, and people need to realise it themselves.

What I'd recommend, if he really is the one, is that you always stick to your guns of how you see things, and never back down.... not even when pissing him off. And then he'll come around

My girlfriend and i had decided that i should quit my high paying job due to the stress it was causing (10+ years of hell there)
It was an easy out as i had a job offer at something that would pay shit but give me time to go to school.
Girlfriend ended up not pitching in like previously discussed,I ended up picking up a second job and am currently working about 90 hours a week....with no chance of getting back to school.
Gf and i have split but refuses to answer me about anything including whether or not shes going to get herself off the lease..
Want to kill myself because im so tired of this bullshit happening because of my shit trust in people and choices...
Only problem is the girl ive always been in love with for the last 10 years cant live with herself if i do it.
She thought I killed myself yesterday and had contacted a bunch of people and sent them to my house and has 15 missed calls from her. I called her back and hearing her crying telling me she doesn't know what shell do when i go fucking wrecked me


I want this all to end so bad. I've been wanting to die for over half of my life. I just wish I wouldn't wake up tomorrow.

There...i said it. Sorry for being a bitch but i dont have anyone to tell it to. I want to fucking die.

Thank you user. I will. I feel a lot better now. Thank you to everyone with their advice.