Greentext thread?

Greentext thread?

>be me
>tired
>lonely
>legitimately stupid
fucking gamestop

>be me
>suc dicc
>feels gay
>"no homo"
>not gay
>mfw

feels good man

>be me
>hate life
>hate self
>hate people

its like I have to build on this but don't wana

>be me
>nut

>be me
>be taking a good ol shit
>see thread
>share with bros

Was a good shit too.

>be me
>don't wanna be me
>try to be op
>am fag now

>me
>stoned
>lolis and Sup Forums
a perfect night

I might dump

>kindergarten
>actually attending kindergarten not just a creepy pedophile
>have a female friend I've had since pre-k
>super close, to the point where we enter the tunnel on the playground from opposite ends, meet in the center, and kiss
>naptime one day
>she wakes me up
>leads me to the bathroom
>nanithefuck.jpg
>takes me inside and pulls down her pants, revealing tiny child vagina
>this is new
>reveal my own tiny dick
>we inspect each other, and I suggest touching them together
>she refuses
>we go back out and get in our sleeping bags again, holding hands
>woke up and ate apple slices in peanut butter

I have a ton of fucked up kindergarten era stories if anyone's interested

Interested

...

> cross country drive with my brother in 2007
> a little hung over and dehydrated from drinking in Colorado the night before
> make it to Grand Canyon, buy some tents and camping gear at Walmart
> hike down to bottom camp site
> 2-3 hours or thereabouts
> even though downhill, legs cramp up something fierce for the last 45 minutes
> humid as balls down there cuz of river
> shitty night sleep in 6' tent. (I'm 6'2")
> wake up next morening
> feelok.jpg
> make it to half way point, take break have sammich
> begin 2nd half of trek out
> start to cramp up again
> both quads, calves.
> literally falling to the ground every 30 yards in agony
> ground covered in Mule shit
> fucked.com
> ask passing mule tourist company to send a nigga down for me will pay for it.
> nope
> rangers walk by. tell me to down a 2 liter bottle of gatorade and they wil be back in 30 mins
> laying down, whole body is cramping: ribs, face, tongue, arms, shoulders, abs everything
> start back up the trail, falling in mule shit every 30 years
> get smart, stop every 30 feet --> no more falling in mule shit
> stop at 3/4 mark, drink more gatorade, eat pringles etc
> stopped for 2 hours, still breathing heavy
> blood was thick as oil
> ranger telling stories of how an Olympic marathoner died here prior month
> thanks asshole
> see eurofags wearing all black, no water, jeans casually strolling around.
> Fuck you I hope you all die
> finally get going again
> near the top, a wild desert thunderstorm appears
> lighting shooting all over the place
> pitch black at this point
> make it to shuttle bus just before deluge
> 16 hours to GTFO of that shit hole

Not sure if I should avoid that place for the rest of my life or get in such kick ass shape that I run up and down it to kick its ass.

Kindergarten fucker here. I'll go ahead and post another one from when I was around that age

>be me
>like 8
>visiting grandparent's house in the middle of Bumfuck Nowhereland
>cousin suggests we go to his house
>lolokay.webm
>traverse the barren 20 feet to his house
>his dog recently gave birth to puppies
>things go well at first, until he suggests we go upstairs
>he carries a puppy two or three steps up, sets it down, and rolls it
>puppy gently flops down stairs, no harm done
>shit escalates
>I stand at the top of the staircase, holding a tiny black lab puppy
>the poor fuck has no idea the hell that will befall him
>I launch him upwards, he sails through the air
>time seems to slow down as he wriggles around helplessly in midair
>he slams into the edge of a step, and rolls to the bottom
>he's barely moving but we don't even notice
>more fluffers are rocketed through the air to their near death until we get bored and I go back to grandma's

To this day, nobody knows that it was I who severely injured an entire litter of puppies. I hate myself a little more every time I think about it.

As bad as of a thing as it was, it was long ago. I know it might be hard, but you need to let it go. If you regret it, that's okay. You were young and didn't know how bad it was. It's a thing of the past, and the puppies are in a better place. Just chill out, and don't be hard on yourself about it.

Lol, nice meme

Someone being nice to me?
On b?

Seriously though, thank you. It's been troubling me for over a decade and you've helped me begin to come to terms with it.

i averted your experience user.

>sit in front of a computer 50+ hours/week and out of shape but still want to hike in the grand canyon
>drive to the south rim
>stay in a lodge for the night
>wake up early next morning, have big breakfast
>fill my camelbak with water until near bursting, load up salty snacks, first aid, hiking boots, hat, sunglasses
>hike three miles down into the canyon
>feeling good, decide to turn around before i get tired
>get exponentially harder to go back up with each step
>take breaks all the time, constantly panting
>getting hotter by the minute
>can't drink anymore because stomach full of water
>clouds starting to gather in the distant horizon
>stop at the 1.5 mile rest mark, drench my face in water
>get a second wind and fight my way back to the top
>clouds getting close
>nobody seems to care; families pass me going down into the canyon wearing flip-flops
>rest at the lodge
>torrential downpour and lightning for a whole hour
>still glad i went

No problem. I've got too many memories and regrets to count. Same thing people told me to try. Works pretty well.

...

>>be me
>>addicted to pepe
>>see this thread
>>perhaps an unsaved pepe?
>>no unsaved pepes
my disappointment immeasurable and my day is ruined.

...

>come to this thread
>appreciate a good pepe post
>see this post
Relief washes over me in an awesome wave and my day is made.