Gf of 5 years left me. How did you start a new life and overcome the feels ?

Gf of 5 years left me. How did you start a new life and overcome the feels ?

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Music helps for me, so I suggest getting into new music so you don't get reminded of her because of the songs you've been introduced to over the last five years. Also fapping to porn with people who don't look like her helps a great deal.

why'd she leave you?

Probably because you didnt propose over 5 years you dumb faggot

move along user, my ex left me after 6 years of relationship, get a new girl,it took me a month to 'recover', it sucks, but move along...

Got another job and worked about 60 hours/week for a year, saved up a shit ton of money from the extra hours plus not spending money on her, bought a nice ass car, back to 40 hours/week, fuck sluts and play video games now.

Still haven't. I do have one piece of advice that I learned from my experience. Please do not turn to substances to deal with what you're going through. They don't help. They only make things worse.

it's like a pet. they die eventually. you get over it and get a new one. that's part of the process.

Find enough exhuastive hobbies to distract yourself constantly.

You should feel happy that your free to do whatever you want

Between dating and being engaged, I was with mine for ten years. Caught the bitch cheating (she hadn't slept with him yet, but I found logs of voice and video sex chats, as well as exchanged pictures). This was about five months ago now.

It seriously sucks, OP; no matter what you do, there's nothing that can prevent how much it's going to tear your heart out and grind it into dust. For me, my best coping mechanism has been to just let the sadness flow out of me into anger. Get pissed off, and then channel that anger into something. I've been using it to work out daily. Whatever you choose to do, just don't bottle it up, or it's gonna drown you. With time, you'll start to have the rose colored glasses lifted, and you'll start to look back and see all the flaws, all the bullshit you put up with, and you'll find you're better off.

more creampie?

>male
>having feels

dude, get drunk and get over it

women are fucking shit, you're lucky if you find one that shares common interests and is subservient enough to not enforce any bs on you

suicide is a good tv show.

I left my girl of 4 years and stupidly kept giving her chances.

I know I sound like a sociopath but the reality is she fucked our realtionship over and over and I just thought I was smart enough to fix it. Ended up being co dependent because she was such a slave for my attention, i totally forgot how to be alone.

Getting over that shit isnt easy, i'm still fucked up almost a year after the break up. But It gets better. Believe in yourself. invest in your hobbies. Narcissism has actually been helping me. The more I accomplish and tell myself I'm awesome for it, the more confident I feel that the rest of my life is gonna be full of happiness and great things.

Sounds cheesey but, fake it till you make it. Will your happiness into existence. Even if your wish is to get back together, all you have to do is to become the most desirable version of yourself, and she'll come running back if she's not retarded.

You're amazing user, and your gf thought that about you for a long time. You can refresh that feeling in her, and in yourself, whenever you feel like it. It will just take a bit of work.

We have complete opposite minds. I am very open minded and into self development type shit and she's like a sleeping zombie just going along with the rest of peope. We started fucking since the beginning non stop for like 2 years then it slowed down but still got some . I think it was the sex that prevented us to connect since we just wanted to fuck all the time. Anyway I don't really love her so getting over her won't be so hard it's the single life that is hard I don't have any friends or shit to do

holy shit sauce on that gif?

this dude gets it

Oh, and post and nudes you have of her on Sup Forums. It sounds stupid and probably petty, but seriously, that little bit of revenge actually does help.

false, weed helps a lot if you use it exclusively for meditating/ introspection. I blew my own fucking mind open and moved past all my baggage in one night by smoking a good sized bowl and turning off all my technology for about 4 hours.

dont go down that rabbit hole with booze or any hard drugs tho

Throw shit away, get down to bare bones. Maintain public appearance. Delete shit. Exercise. Figure out goal and pursue. New clothes. Read. Go out alone and start a conversation with no intended sexual outcome.

How to win friends/influence people.

It sucks and hurts. No one cares. So what? This is a rough time - aim to come out better.

You are taking your breakup totally wrong. You need to call her up and tell her how breaking up is a big mistake. If she hangs up on you or stops taking your calls, text her with same message. Finally wait outside her place and yell that she's making a big mistake. If all this fails, then wait for her to leave her place, hit her over the head with a shovel, throw her in the trunk of your car and bury her somewhere deep in the woods.

> Waited 3 years
> Waited a little more
> Actually, pretended things were okay
> Forced myself to not fall into the abyss
> Losing her was so bad I actually didn't fully register it in my brain (unlike previous dark times that hit hard as a motherfucker)
> I will forever remember peering into the abyss for a split second
> Seeing the entirety of the pain and just how vast and deep it went
> I turned back
> I've been living in what is basically a lie
> So much so it's turned true
> I'm okay now
> But I'm not the same
> I liked the old me much better
> I can meet new women now, except there aren't any where I live (am considering moving to better city)
> Fear that new happiness will not be able to remove the darkness hiding under all that concrete
> Fear I won't be able to ever feel truly happy like I remember feeling.
> Don't want everything built on lies
> You can beat the darkness
> You just have to be sure it doesn't take you out with it
> The last battle began with no, the next will begin with yes
> Here's to having a few pixels left in the old health bar.

Lost mine of 7 years. She decided she was no longer the traditional person I met. Got hooked on drugs. Etc..... It was only a few weeks ago. But it's easier than you think. Get back on the horse and occupy your time. I focused on the bad times with her and the good times every where else. Hit some bars up, go to some friends houses and pick up a new hobby. You will meet someone better than you had before if you exercise a bit of patience. As for music, it helps if it's the right selection. I went to 60s era oldies(beach boys, hermans hermits, hamilton Joe frank and Reynolds) that's what worked for me. Your results may vary.

Swallow the redpill. It is a bitter one but it is the truth

Damn man

Never drank beer before i turned 21 always thought was gross, gf you turned my life around and made me better person left me cause i had lots of problems with depression, been drinking a 4-8 beers a day for almost a year now since she left, and ive really enjoyed different types of beer, was originally to stop being so depressed now its just for fun

Tl:Dr Became alcoholic

I started gambling m.youtube.com/watch?v=R_qaXYGdRJ0

gambling does solve really everything

It's ok user just know that you are not hurting alone.
If you decide to kys just live stream for us so you won't feel alone in your last breaths

jesus dude

as a guy who wholly relates to the diction used in your post

I legitimately consider that poetry

I was in the same boat my dude. After 4 years, she ended it and I found out that she has a new guy a week later. It tore me apart for a few months actually...lost weight and didnt have a drive to do anything.
I got myself to be a better person by hitting the gym daily and keeping my goals aligned with school/work. Best thing that helped IMO was going out and meeting new people/girls and after messing around with a few and get the idea that you're wanted by others, you start gaining the confidence and happiness back. After 3 years of being single and enjoying my time, I found myself a true keeper and Im glad it all played out that way. True learning experience. Hopefully it'll be that way with you as well. Everyone has a path

>relationship of 5 years
>she gives complete commitment
>eventually become dependant on her
>have some issues in our relationship
>don't know how to fix them
>they keep building up
>eventually prince charming faggot sniffs them out
>he starts to influence her against me
>he amplifies her dissapointment towards me
>dissapointment turns to resentment
>grow tired and sick of their bullshit
>finally expose all the petty lies and manipulative games that have been building up in the last few months
>she suddenly has the courage to speak horrendous things about me and our relationship
>dumps me because some faggot got into her head and messed up her mind
In all these years I became so dependant on her, I forgot what it was to be alone. Now I'm thinking for the best way to an hero.

the red pill is trash, and if you live your life to it, you end up a retard with a hot wife who doesnt love you, like trump.

If that's what you're into go for it, but us intellectual alphas are gonna win the long run within a few hundred years tops.

give me your steam or blizzard ID, we should chat and play some games sometime. You're not alone.

Quality advice non. In the same boat. Nice to see im not the only passenger.

Fuck off cunt. I don't feel alone. I've got too much shit left to do in life. One of 'em's happiness. I made it this far, I'm not quitting now.

Will pay for last part

I screenshot this, so i can look at this everytime i need a talk. I feel you were talking right to me user. Thank you for that.

Nothing gets you over the last one like the next one.
Find a bunch of randoms then drink/smoke and fuck your way back to happiness. Worked for me.

I can provide more details, it only matters what you mean by last part.

I have been married for 13 years. I have also been banging my ex for 5 years. neither of us like our spouses, but our spouses have good jobs that make us rich. probably better this way anyways. Dirty motel sex is the best sex.

How does one not become dependent on their other while in a long term relationship with a girl with tons of insecurities? I've been with my girl for four years now and I feel like if we were to break up I would be shattered and lost. I was never so dependent on someone before we got together. I used to be a free spirit who wasn't afraid to just jump in a car and go. Now I'm a dependent fool who can't even shop or make a meal without his woman around. I literally can't imagine a life where I'm single and it worries me. That "what if" scenario where it doesn't last. How can I be more prepared for that if it does happen?

Why do girlfriends always leave at the time depression kicks in?

I think it's because, when you are depressed you start ignoring her big time. And they love your attention. Depression makes them sick of you somehow.

You really have to prepare. The end is coming soon.

Can anyone tell me what love feels like? Like in a non joking matter. I'm in a relationship and I'm not sure if I love this women or if I'm just wasting both of our time. What does it feel like to have a girl who you truly love?

dump her asap, the sooner the better so the damage is minimized. never get into a relationship with someone that much weaker and broken than you, that's their therapist's job and they get paid for it.

they might not notice it, but these hyper dependent broken girls will eat up all your free time and thought, and they're never ever worth that loss

you are true, I'm with my bitch for 8 years and that fucking whore cheated on me with her boss on work party , but I'm too weak to kick her out of my life, she promise that she will never do it again but I'm everyday angry and sad aout that by that time , now it's two months I know it....

Could be trust, understanding and support.

To overcome it slowly, you let time pass. To overcome it for a brief moment, you abuse substances at a cost. To get over it and more, to move above it to something better, you must evaluate yourself. Your pain is you feel you're at a loss. Imagine the version of yourself that is better, that she is at a loss for losing the relationship with you. Now carve yourself into that person. This probably means sort your life out, start getting in shape, make a more attractive version of yourself.

I've been through it before man, and the only thing that really gave me any fire back that I lost from that terrible hurt was getting muscular, making more money, and sculpting a better stronger me in a lot of ways.

Literally I was depressed forever about it until I concluded she fucked me over and was a total cheating whore.

why did she leave you?

Could be, but I have that for my best friends too.

Why did she leave you?

Your course of action is really predicated on delineating your suppositions.

because they aren't worth your time.

all those shitty tumblr/twitter posts they make about
>if you cant handle me at my worst, you don't deserve my at my best

are pure hypocrisy. It happens. You're porbably better than them. Don't develope an ego about it, but do some cirtical htinking and try to understand that they probably just don't have the morals/ empathetic capacity that you do.

And under no circumstances should you start thinking that you are better than women in general. that's the red pill road, where you become angry, dejected, and unappealing to literally all other human beings.

Yeah, but you're no homosex, right?

Dump the nudes, nigga

I'll keep this in mind as I will be thinking deeply on the situation.

this is my dream girl what how do i find her and how do i prepare for the breakup

Well, no... I just have to think love is more than trust, understanding, and support. Is there really nothing more?

In other words, work on yourself and be patient. Being patient is pretty hard though, especially after leaving a long term relationship.

To me I think it's just some bullshit neurotransmitters that cycle around your neurons. Making you over-attached to the person, so that you can mate with him. That's the reason why no one can explain what love is. Because the reality is another unpleasant truth.

Women are overrated.. get a goldfish

You prepare by getting a spare girlfriend. Always have a spare. I didn't and I regret it.

honestly man its going to take you awhile to get over. You are going to hurt and get mad for awhile. Hell, i still have intermittent episodes of anger and its been almost a year ago after my last committed relationship. However, Ive had my fun with random chicks afterward and I am completely okay.

What you are experiencing right now is dopamine withdrawal that she provided you via your relationship. It fucking sucks and your chest hurts.

It took me a long time to realize this; it really does get better and you will move on my /b friend.

Fore reference it took me about 8 months to get over my last relationship of 3 years. It might take you more, or it might take you less. That is what it is.

start drinking

Pretend nothing happened, was only a bad dream

OP from this post Do not post nudes you have of her, your better than that

>Gf of 5 years left me.

youtube.com/watch?v=kdOPBP9vuZA

I think love is trust, understanding, and support.

I think ROMANTIC love is all of the above, plus sexual attraction. If you don't find him/her sexually attractive, it's friendship-love.

True love is not "one person for one person". True love is when you love someone enough that their needs equal your needs. That you are not selfish. That you think considering how it will affect both you and your partner.

You men out there bitching about shitty women. I know a girl who is married after 12 years together. He is cheating on her, and she loves him enough to keep letting him kick her around (figuratively). He is a selfish, cheating asshole, and she still makes excuses for him and would take him back even after he's told her that "if it wasn't this one, it will be another one".

Shitty selfish people are shitty people, regardless of the gender. Shitty people are not worth anyone's time....if only life were that simple.

fuck you bitch , this is how every woman should be

faggot who strokes his dick all day

I know it's not as long as yours, but got out of a 2 year relationship about 6 months ago. Found out a couple weeks after we broke up she already had a new boyfriend, tore me up as my plan was to wait a bit.

6 months later they're still together and it sucks man, but every month that goes by it gets easier and easier. I can think about her now and not get sick, like it's starting to feel more normal. Also finding other interests help like other girls that you'll end up liking even more.

All my thoughts about her go away when I talk to a new girl that's exciting and different. And when there's no girl I take up hobbies, i've been playing Basketball recently and progressing from shit to pretty decent has been nice as well it takes my mind off things at the gym. Eventually i'll be able to just think fuck her.

youtube.com/watch?v=t7Tm0SQT7N4

real talk homie

kek

also another point, talking about it does help like you're doing now. even with strangers on the internet.

You sound reasonable as fuck. Any advice you can give to me?

dont be a hero bro, its not worth it, this is my story and I know how you fell even I 'm with her I would like to kill myself or her or everyone every day

Your story is even worse than mine. Sometimes I ask myself from where do people like you find the strength to continue on with the same person who caused them so much pain. For me the feel of watching how your gf turns to a monster thanks to the influence of some faggot was horrible. I felt like my gf was dead the moment he started whispering into her year.

I dont know if I will last it , its very difficult, every day she came back from work where she is with this faggot I 'm angry, she promises that she will never do it again but I know that she is with im every day 8 hours in office...

op from here

Yes. You are going to wake for awhile with chest pains. Thats normal, we have all been through it. If you were good to her,its not you its her. If your were and asshole to her its you , and you need to take this experience and learn from your mistakes. However, do not hurt from the fact; you just were not ready for it, as weird as it sounds. Hopefully you were good to her.

Its kinda circumstantial, either way its all about realizing how to react at that point and time and learning from it if you were a dick.

Just remember; we have all been through it besides the faggots that are trolling you right now. Disregard that anyway, they are sociopaths who get off on that shit. Human nature for them.

Block her numbers; cut ties with mutual friends especially of they still hang out with her on a regular basis, and are displaying signs of picking sides. Thats on them not you.

I worked with my ex, i was forced to see her everyday so I could not heal like i needed too. Change jobs if you have too; I had too.

Find new friends, go to bars, or continue to do activities that you like too; thats inevitable.

If you can, move to an area with a large amount of people where its easy to meet people; thats what i did and its been great

Be around new people, establish relationships with new friends or more and see what comes of it.

Im in a much better place now because we broke up but it took me a long time to realize that; this is normal.

real talk; Most of us on here have been where you are besides the incels LOL. Hurting over a failed relationship is completely normal but time really does mend your butthurt. Its important to cut off all contact completely with her if its not going to get anywhere; that is what you will need to find out for yourself. if she is flaunting her dudes she is seeing in front you; move the fuck on and never talk to asshole again. She is not worth your fucking time or emotions. To be continued

Off her

same faggot from the other posts

Just realize that women and men are wired completely different. Men actually have a harder time dealing with emotional shit than women because we are typically raised via parent or culture to hold all our emotions in or not display them ever. It makes these issues harder on us, because we did not learn how to emotionally future ourselves like most woman have; this is normal across the population that Ive grown up in.

Thank you for this. Unfortunately I was the asshole. I never cheated on her, though. I neglected her feelings. I never used violence on her or treated her like shit. All I ever did was not giving the same commitment she gave to me. This started building up. Same faggot wanted her and sniffed our issues. Turned her against me. She became some passive-aggressive, vengeful bitch for months. I knew what was happening, I tried to fix it numerous times. But that faggot knows how to play his cards. At the end, when I finally exposed them. Maybe she had nothing to loose anymore, so she just released all the built up shit onto me. She even said that she doesn't feel anything towards me, and she will never break contact with him. She is now dependent on him. And I know that after our break up he continued to comfort her and make her forget everything I had with her. Horrible feelings.

I really hope you find the strength to sort it all out, bro. I'd really hate to be in your shoes.

If its like that; show your fucking dominance and confront him; never let a faggot undermine how you feel for this woman. If you was emotionally seduced by this dickhead; this might work on her. Don't do anything likes texts to him or some other gay shit; know where he hangs out and show up.

Had a similar instance of this faggotry but it turned out this girl and I at that time were incompatible, that whats I did at that time.

Its one thing if he was fucking her when she was with you, its another thing if that was after the fact. But if she is treating you like shit now, she will continue to do so in the future. You are so much better than this if true.

By being the kind of person a gf doesn't want to leave.

You're fucked, basically.

thanks man, I have a question, will you be able to forgive her and try to live with her? I've got a habit on her and can't imagine that I'm now lonely...

"if she was" correction

and worst of it feeling is that I started with her when she was 16 and she was clean girl with no mileage of dicks , now I feel she is a fucking dirty whore

I've been having the same problem for over 3 years, I can't even take any relationships with a new girl seriously and my lack of wanting to put any new effort into finding someone new is nearly gone. Just trying to wait till I get through school or have figured my own shit out personally. Hopefully after that everything works out, but its hard as fuck going through so much shit alone.

Indeed she was emotionally seduced by him. Because he was confessing her. Making her tell him all the problems she had with me, so he can know what she is lacking from me. She never fucked him. And I can't confront him physically because he is from another country. I really have this deep feeling that if she had the courage to treat me like shit until now, even if I get her back she will continue to do so. Also there is no garantee she will not do the same, once she proved she is able to. Perhaps we simply became incompatible and things had to end like that.

>I started with her when she was 16 and she was clean girl with no mileage of dicks
Trust me, I really know that feel bro. But if I have to imagine that this same girl preffered some other dick. This would really devastate me. I would try to rationalize it. I would say something like: "maybe she wanted to try something different, 8 years she was never with someone else, so maybe that's why". Deep down it would really devastate me. Because you create some perfect creature, suited to meet your every need. And eventually you feel like she grows tired of you, despite the fact that you had became extremely dependant on her. You feel like her candle has already burnt out, but yours is still going. You feel replaced. You feel like you want to trust her, but your gut is telling you not to. It would be impossible to imagine my life without her if we had 8 years together. But if her candle has burnt out, this means the tables are turned and she had enslaved me.

Thank you user. (Not OP)

>First you drink alcohol
>fuck bunch of chicks
>can be distant friends or randoms you meet at bar
>eventually you drink enough you forget her
>usually takes about 3 years
>continue with life by either fucking chicks or settling
Easy, user.

same dude who spent the time to write out all the other shit.

That realization is really step 1; after 5 years and not realizing what she has is not a good sign. However if you are omniscient enough to realize that you neglected her feelings than that could be a starting point on how to rebuild. There is a reason you and her spent 5 years together. But do not become a cuck, and don't be afraid to cut off all ties if things do not show progress

Yes I would never be a cuck. If things doesn't work out I would have a valuable lesson learnt. Lesson is:
>If you don't provide enough commitment, eventually no matter how loyal, the person will look for it from someone else.
And also:
>A guy can break up for thousand of reasons, a girl never breaks up, she is only replacing the guy with someone she things he is better than him.

rek yourself go wild go nuts go crazy after that man up and go on

Hmm, I got out of a 7 year relation ship and im 32.. Tried bars.. they worked out ok. Tried online dating. OKcupid was fucking badass. Tried out tinder.. Hooked up with like 20 chicks in the course of 3 months.

Found my wife on okcupid