>You hear a great roar in the sky
>Trumpets begin playing
>You look
>Jesus, the Messiah, is coming from the clouds
>You realize all this time Christianity was the true religion and you never believed
>Or you are a Christian and you realize you were totally right this whole time
What's the first thing you do Sup Forums???
In a completely serious context.
genuflect
Be glad that all the madness is finally over
You know it all gets worse if you're left behind from the rapture, right?
Ask no forgiveness and accept my fate.
For I do not believe that in the eyes of a god I would be seen as redeemable.
1. summon demon
2. "accidently" fuck up summoning ritual
3. get raped by a demon for all eternity
>i make my own heaven
I walk up to him, he's got some splainin' to do.
OP is a faggot
Be glad that the madness will begin. Ever read the last chapter of the new testament? LMAO some crazy shit would go down
>i make my own heaven
i bought a book called this once.
I'd rather die fighting on my feet than live an eternity in servitude to god.
I'd assume it was some kind of alien invasion / trickery and get my rifle
pic related
Scream "Allah u Akbar".
just think, if the guy in this plane flicked a flake of snot at them their whole tribe would die.
Revalations and the left behind series are both great reads
And they wouldn't even know why
Go to heaven or die....either way it’s over.
Don’t believe in rapture or eternal hell.
rapture was made up just like the trinity faggot
FUCK OFF HEAVENNIGGER WE ARE FULL
I accept my fate.
Huh, seems like I get to spend the remainder of my life fighting demons since I never believed, that sounds pretty rad.
I'd be tempted to 11th hour my way into heaven by just praying for forgiveness at the last second, but I think the G man would see through it. I'd totally be cool with taking up a role fighting demons and saving those whose punishments are penance for getting into heaven. Being a demon fighter would be awesome. Be all like, fuck you demon while you stab its eyes out. If you're listening God I'd be cool with that. Just give me a sick heaven blade and I'm down.
All stones will fall from my heart!
The very first thing would probably be to swear loudly, then realize that my previous realization is premature.
realize that christianity is a lie and awaken from the dream
nice try tho
They're always depicted as male, but maybe try to find a cute female angel?
I'd hope they have reproductive parts...
It doesn't actually get better if you're taken during the rapture. Christian heaven would suck balls.
>what's the first thing you do
laugh at all the racist Christians being sent to hell by black Jesus
like in the rapture, where all devoted christians depart to heaven, while everyone else stays behind?
Good, one defective part of the population gone.
Hopefully Allah pulls the same stunt, so we can enjoy utopia in peace.
He was a sand nigger, not a nigger
Ask what is the correct branch. My money is on Catholic until it became cucked, then Orthodox Christianity.
can you imagine a cloud with every sect of christianity on it?
it would rain blood!
How do we know it's jesus? By the trumpets?
Smorgasbord christian. He'll have a little bit of this and a little bit of that.....
>knows which bits of the infallible word of god are true and which bits are not
religiotards.
I don’t change my stance, unless I see God firsthand I still won’t know if he is real or not.
Doesn’t change the fact I try to do good by people even if Heaven and God above isn’t.
He’s a white, wavy haired brunette dude in robes.
Duh.
Ask to help him smite the fags
I’ll start by killing myself
wait....................found him
Spark up a joint and pass it to Jesus as he steps down on earth then he most likely will multiply that joint by 300 and we all get baked AF
Study more retard.
You obviously know nothing of how the rapture will actually occur
How can you prove pic related was not jesus?
Trips confirm him
Oh shit it's bluebeam day
Ask jesus why
> the trinity faggot
Whodat?
y
>What's the first thing you do Sup Forums???
Call BS
Rapture is non biblical jewish turd
A God that is willing to punish an individual for eternity for a finite crime is NOT a just God.
God would know that I have down my best to be morally just. I have nothing to fear, even if I dont go to church.
I verify what I'm seeing with everyone around me. If I'm the only one that sees it, I check into a mental hospital. If everyone sees it, I suppose I start apologizing and then ask Jehovah/YHWH why the FUCK he was so obtuse and obscure for billions of years, and why he would make it so DIFFICULT to believe the bullshit written by sheep herders.
according to tradtional catholic teachings, the rapture was 500-1500AD this was the 1000 years when the church saved many souls.
Grab the spear of destiny and kill Them all.
HEIL NEPHILIM
Helgaðe jǫtnar
Pretend to offer my hand in friendship to Jesus
Sucker punch him instead
Kick him while he is down
After I have slain him, demand my combat with God itself
Wrong, and I believe in Jesus thank you very much
I’d probably just fall to my knees. My first thoughts would be of how I’ve strayed from God these last few years. I’ve tried, I really have. I’m a teacher and I chose that profession specifically because I wanted to serve others.
But it’s hard to keep the faith. I watch the special ed kids and the impoverished kids get left behind day after day and there’s only so much I can do. It’s hard to maintain the lofty ideal that God has a plan for them when this whole world seems to have been created to forget them.
I would pray that I have a chance to ask Him why. I would just sit there on my knees and pray that he show me he never meant to leave them behind. I would beg for him to show me that there’s more to this world than what I can see around me.
For so long I had faith that there was. I looked for it and looked for it. But the human soul can only witness so much cruelty before it begins to harbor resentment.
I am glad you don't believe in hell. Keep thinking that
Jesus Christ it took you til after you had gone through enough schooling to become a teacher to realize the world os fucked up? You must have lived a very sheltered, priveliged life
this
Life is just
How sheltered am I at 50?
silly choice desu, all becasue your pride yourselfishness and silly thinking, we're all sinners, no one but the blessed virgin is perfect in the eyes of god.
Explain how life is just
This guy doesn't understand faith.
> I don't care if you can't find it there
> Believe in it anyhow
> If your well goes dry
> The tears that you cry
> Will water that thirsty ground
> When you got no reason
> Keep on believing
> Doesn't matter if you don't know how
> Never mind if that horse is blind
> Keep your shoulder to the plow
I was a Christian for many years. Don't fucking tell me what I don't understand. It's all illogical, unprovable, highly fallible, multi-translated, doctored and adulterated bullshit, buddy.
He's simply saying what 'faith' is. And he's right. Faith is blind trust.
We're in agreement there. Do you have faith in government? Banks? People? I trust and believe all of those things, but not without evidence or experience.
Ok but fred eaglesmith is pretty good though
Quickly rape and murder a child and then convert and confess. EzPz
i wouldn't believe it until i was face to face with god, and he did something to convince i wasn't just hallucinating or that all of this wasn't just some shit i didn't understand.
then i'd ask why he made me an atheist, why christianity was only introduced to me through complete retards, how come he has a sex and gender when he has no need for reproduction, and why the only thing i experienced anywhere close to a miracle was through bishamonten. after he answered i'd tell him "see why i didn't believe in you? i was never presented with anything believable."
if he's real, then my non-belief is clearly his fault.
but that counts for any religion. what if someone keeps their faith in the wrong religion? fake it until you believe it is a dumb idea that only sounds reasonable if you're extremely isolated from the outside world.
Gonna be honest with ya I just wanted to post those lyrics
It's a school
We are souls and spirits
Life grinds us as persons, refining our souls, liberating our spirits
Yup, that’s him.
throw crap at him
make an act of conrition and hooe for the best.
Never were a real christian
I'm not religious yet i have way more faith than you
What about the Mormons?
Run up and tell jesus he's a fucking faggot and his dad is a cuck too
Belief is the intangible is essential to survival and health of people (groups) as evidenced by History
Look at the 'West' rn... 3 generations of dechristianization and already dying and begging to be raped and killed by 70 IQ subhumans... who have faith
Thank the kikes, definitely so this time
That’s we’re your wrong kiddo
You’ve squandered your spring and summer. And winter has come. What do you expect?
In the intangible
Except for those who die at childbirth, right?
>Muh "No True Scotsman" fallacy.
Mmk, bud. Pride cometh before the fall.
What the fuck are you in about?
No
You choose your own epistemology (what produces knowledge)
What matters in a belief is the results it produces
Its not just the crime, you stupid nigger. Its many crimes over a lifetime+the unwillingness to surrender your soul and try to grow into a better person in His name for the entirety of a lifetime
>wrong religion
Only results matter
You goys are darwinian but dont apply it to beliefs (evopsych)
Part of the deal
You can rescind at no cost for 7 years
See
Explain what you mean by that. And please try to be more exact, and less expressive/symbolic
What?
I'm saying you are and were a poor Christian
your belief wasnt sincere, it didnt come from inside
I wasnt raised a believer
You conformed under pressure and resented it
You pretended to believe even to yourself
all those choices were yours and so are their results
You're facing yourself
Fuck, see
>darwinian
i don't think you know what that word means. a person can't be darwinian. and it doesn't pertain to religion, it only describes the biological evolution in lifeforms. nothing else.
Lmfao this is some bullshit
He was implying you likely hold Darwinian beliefs regarding evolution. Not even involved in the convo and it was obvious.
Get the gun. There be demons n sheeeit.
wtf? He wants to destroy the planet?
thats fucking wrong even if you are destroying your own planet
and what's your point?
That you completely misinterpreted his point
what does that have to do with darwin? there's no point in being cryptic.
I'm an atheist but would love to be proved wrong. I am terrified of death, even if I didn't qualify for heaven I would be delighted to know some of my friends and family would.
The soul chooses to incarnate but may change its mind and decide to opt out
It may also be useful and planned for it to incarnate for a very short time
We are not our bodies, they're vehicles
Is life unfair if your car breaks down or your pants rip up?
Likewise whatever happens to our bodies (including emotional and mental bodies) doesn't weigh directly on us anymore than what happens to our home or Teddy bears.
Saying that, I'm aware it's a convenient, self satisfying belief construct
But it works and that's what matters: results