In a LDR and my gf doesn't like sending nudes but is fine with stuff in person...

In a LDR and my gf doesn't like sending nudes but is fine with stuff in person. she still sends nudes but very mild and they're hard to get. We're a dom/sub relationship but when i demand for nudes she freaks out because of her anxiety.
How do i make sending nudes a bigger part of the relationship? like so it's part of her daily routine. I love this girl but the sexual frustration is real
inb4 saying to leave or cheat, not happening

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>blah blah I am a cucked faggot

Fuck off and kys.

don't get mad little boy, not my fault you're alone

bump

break her

how?

I wouldn't give you nudes either ya bastard you'll probably share them lol

lol i dont even save them, for reasons. i just want them semi consistently because shes my gf and my sub i should be allowed them

oh should you? lmfao

stop acting like you deserve. That's cringey.

Why don't you take them? when you have her in your hands, take what you want. Take the pictures yourself.

Can you read? Long distance relationship homie, barely see each other in person for now
Im not acting like i deserve, i do deserve, im her dom

Mind games.
Girls like the idea of commitment, so you have to make her realize that doing what you want is her way of loving you.
3 things i do:
1 is plant ideas in her head without pressure, just mention/talk about things and let it stew (might take months)
2 is positive reinforcement everytime she does something that pleases you, even if it is a slight progress
3 is punishment, by being "sad" when things don't go your way. Never rage, never be angry, just let her feel your "sadness" it'll make her want to do something for you.
I simplify a bit here, but you get the idea.

My sub, but doesn't do what I want?

Retard she isn't a sub. Also if she likes being naked in person, then why are you crying? With amount of revenge porn out there why would any chick send that shit? It's too risky. You want to jerk off to your girl instead of fuck her? Fucking autist loser. Keep thinking the dumb shit people say on the internet is real, and you'll lose your girl real fast. Appreciate what you're getting, if you don't, then you won't have it at all.

You're the type of faggot that white knights on kik/fb threads, gtfo

I disagree, there is always room for improvement, isn't it ?

Another cunt who cant read lol
Long distance relationship. cant just fuck her when i want my only option is to jerk off

i got 2 and 3 down packed, already do that pretty good
for planting ideas what kind of ideas? like how do i plant the idea that sending nudes to your long term serious bf/dom is okay and a good thing?

cringe

Seems straight forward. Help her fix anxiety.

You don't. You grow up and see that your request is causing your partner harm. If you need a gf who is casual about nudes, then dump your current one and find one who is cool with it.

Being in a d/s relationship makes what you are doing *less* OK. She doesn't want me to see her pussy and asshole. You should respect that. Respecting her is respecting yourself, after all.

currently trying. suffer from it myself so i know its not a fast process

> i demand for nudes she freaks out
not a true sub
A: she does what you want or she is punished, and eventually does what you want in fear of punishment/disappointment
B: you deal with trying to dom someone who really isn't sub and have the whole awkward situation of being a beta sub... i.e. welcome to my world bro :/

Can someone get this user reddit gold?

^This.

OP here
im not trying to force her, i just want her to start to be more okay with it. dont expect her to just flip a switch and be full on slut, just want to get it started

Why do you feel the need to see new nudes of her daily? If you both fuck pretty much every time when you see each other isn’t that good enough? Don’t toss away actual fucking just for some nude pics my man. My fuck buddy and myself don’t really ever send nudes to each other because we both already know just about every inch of the others body and it’s honestly kind of pointless

You know your gonna get called a faggot right.

Bdsm has boundaries. hers is being slutty with photos, i just want to push them
so no shes not rejecting being a sub

lot of faggots in this thread with a high school tier understanding of BDSM, being a sub doesn't mean you have to do everything, Doms have an actual responsibility to respect the boundaries of their sub even while pushing them in other ways.

Dump your gf and find a girl who gets off on submission. Pic related.

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I don't care. I AM a faggot.

So you enjoy making her uncomfortable? You are not really a dom, just an asshole.

You're not in any relationship, you're a source of attention for a slut. She is getting dicked down every day by everyone but you and she only sends nudes when she is feeling low. It has nothing to do with anxiety and everything to do with keeping you from being a real man.

You ever consider that you're asking for too much and you should leave it alone? Christ, kids these days are losing their shit because their girlfriends won't do stupid shit for them.

I weep for this new generation of women.

you understands

yeah user seems kinda difficult to talk about nudes without it being weird or out of the blue. maybe mention it after you're done fuckin and say "i wish i had your ass on take out" and stare

not as tricky as it seems, just tell her about yourself, girls love talking, and more than anything they love to know whats on your mind.
So first realease the pressure on the nude issue, and tell her how you "feel" when she sends one, or whenever she does something to please you.
Yeah you gonna have to use all sorts of dirty words like "love" and "feelings" and blablablah.
It's a quicker way to seduce a girl into doing things than to pressure her, cause pressure always increases her reluctance.
It's time consuming, and turns yourself into basically a sex villain, but as a Dom you can't escape that.

Real men don't get what they want most of the time and are fine with it. You have it backwards, user.

I'm her dom how do I get her to do what I want LOL

New generation of women here...we're fine with taking loads on our face, cocks up our ass, and being treated like whores when we decide to do it. Save your tears for the next generation of wizards.

I wouldn't even cock slap you. It'd probably be too easy. lmao.

Tell her you’re jerking off to something, and seeing something is necessary. Imagining something that is just not accurate is a waste of time. Definite, permanent reality is the only way to do it, so I understand not cheating. I just told my wife that if I can’t see her, I’m looking at porn and imagining it’s her. Something tells me that while in the same boat, I’ll get results soon. Or she can do that same. The key is getting off together. If she’s thinking of me idgaf what she looks at besides child porn. Basically tell her what’s going to happen, and let her make the decision for you both. You have needs as well.

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This is manipulation, user. Your feelings don't matter more than hers, and hers are just as important than yours. (You go full soyboy when you treat her as if her feelings were more important than yours...so find a balance.)

If you require nudes, and the relationship and start one with a girl who is freer with her body. If you don't want to or can't than be happy with what you have. Or ask for a compromise. Don't force it. Treat her like she's her own person. Because she is.

Read what you wrote as if it were written by another person. You are not being kind to your wife, user...and so you are not being kind to yourself.

But what does that have to do with anything I said?

You are correct. Cocks don't scare me. Now get that image of you slapping a dude with your cock out of your head until you start jerking it to trap porn!

Basically this. Quit being a faggot and give her an order. You’re too emotionally invested to have walk away. Sounds like you negotiated in the beginning wrong, and set the wrong pattern. Grow a pair.

If you're a dude why would you refer to yourself as "new generation women"?

Don’t tell me what my wife wants

Statements like that are probably why you got cheated on.

never white knighted in my life you retard, read what I said. It encouraged doing things to her against her will.

You're the type of guy that pretends to be dominant when you are submissive, then makes up for lost time and cuckholds out of control.

lmao

You were expressing sympathy for a group that doesn't need it. 1 out of 3 porn viewers is from your "new generation." Modesty gets in the way of fun sometimes. A lot of women enjoy anal sex and some like showing off. Have you been to www.reddit.com/r/pelfie lately?

Because it was a joke and because apparently It's OK for dudes to speak for all women...

I'm not. I'm telling you that you are manipating her based on what you wrote. I did not mean to intrude on your marriage, but I'm married too, and I know how painful it is to get into a tug-of-war with your spouse. So apologies for th presumption.

But also, we were are on Sup Forums and I have evert right to judge the fuck out of you.

Well all that's fine and dandy. Yuu do realise i was "weeping" for women who don't want to do that stuff but have to put up with boyfriends that do and pressure them for it, riiiight?

Something tells me you're the type of person who reacts before they think.

I told my wife she can sleep with other men if she wants. Relationships are about more than sex.

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I don't care. I can give you shit regardless. You know where you are, right?

Judge all you want, just know you’re incorrect. If you’re married, you know it’s about compromise. If you think I’m spending eternity taking orders, and not deciding what’s right for us together, you’re getting fucked. And not in the good way. I’m not manipulating anything, nobody can make you do anything in life, I’m clearly expressing my needs so there is no misunderstandings, and giving her choices. If she wants to change our agreement, all she has to do is let me know what she wants to change. From there, I’ll let her know what is possible.

cuck faggit

Manipulation yes it is ! if i write "feelings" it is for a reason. And yes, I use feelings as a mean, not an end.

If she’s getting other dick, I’m getting other pussy. Which isn’t really what I want, so that ultimately will create a divide. If you think I believe that it’s all about getting laid, you must not truly believe im married.

I think you were being stupid then realised it when it was too late and now you're embarrassed and trying to make it seem like you were trolling all along. Just stop replying user, it's pathetic...

Ordering her around and giving her orders that she does not want to follow is not "growing a pair." It's kicking yourself in your own pair. user, jerk off to another girl's pussy and asshole if you need nudes that badly. If you can't...then there might be something decent in you despite your choice of website.

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Also, I don’t think you truly know what sex is spiritually if you’re okay with that.
(Protip: binding of souls)

I do not care if my judgment is incorrect. If that's the case, why are you defending yourself?

Does your wife let you show her off and if so can I see?

How do you know she doesn’t want to follow them?

Feelings don't matter user. Take it from Kendrick Lamar "Fuck Your Feelings" is a motto *YOU* should live by. Your feelings get in the way. They don't make you happy.

>We're a dom/sub relationship

well clearly you're the sub if instead of getting the nudes, you're the one getting so frustrated that you come crying to Sup Forums like a little bitch. i guess this post is you playing out your role of being a submissive or something, she's probably watching this thread and getting off on you getting called out as a bitch. oh fuck, i think i just took the bait and helped your girl get off. whoops.

I’m having a conversation, just not going to say I’m wrong unless I am. Then, I will essentially reflect and find a better solution with my wife. Being wrong means little compared to actual happiness. You can’t see though, we have decided to be monogamous.

This is kind of the only post on this thread I found myself agreeing with.

>source: been in an SM long distance relationship with Borderline unstable girl for 5 years.
>she still insists on us talking
>mfw dont know how to permanently end it because everytime she starts breaking down and making threats even though we no longer have any feels for each other and we're bored

Feelings literally are what create happiness. Suppressing them only leads to negative emotions later on.

You are allowed to want you want. You are not allowed to impose what you want.

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You just break up and move on.

You sound like a selfish prick.

She knows for a FACT you will keep them and show everyone, is why shes fucking nervous. Retard

Don't tell me what to do, shitlord. How can I be embarassed when I have no shame?

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Except that she is rejecting it. If the majority of your relationship is LDR, and she isn't willing to do something literally essential to LDR BDSM, then she's hardly subbing for you. Aspects of her day -- from daily morning check-ins to any requests or demands you have - should also be backed with photographic evidence that the act was completed. That's kind of the cornerstone of it working out LDR.

Yes, I am lmao. Because at some core level, if you push past what I’m willing to do we must not truly be compatible. So instead of being bitter, like an adult we can just go our separate ways, remain friends, and find partners that will truly satisfy us.

You start by asking for compromise. Once that is proven to be impossible and going against your core needs, you owe it to yourself to leave and find a partner capable of giving you what you need. I don’t make decisions off of what I want, but rather what my family and I truly need.

Also: I could jerk off to another women. It’s not my wife. My choice of website is based on my sense of humor, not my morality.

you don't. you go and fuck her irl you pussy

What if the distance in their current situation is insurmountable by normal means

Or do you not have a career yet, so you haven’t experienced that portion of life?
Sometimes the responsible choice isn’t abandoning your responsibilities just to go get laid. I personally work 6 days a week, so I can’t fly across the globe just for a lay. Other communication and trust is a must

No...thoughts create emotions such as happiness, sadness, etc. Focusing on the emotions and the associated feelings is the wrong way to go about it.

Here, user literally believes "If my gf does not send me nudes--which she does not want to do--then I will be unhappy." That's not true. If user told himself "If I respect my gf's boundaries and ask for what I will enjoy within those boundarie, then I can still be happy..." he will he every bit as happy.

OP, here is a suggestion. Ask your gf if you can write on her with removable marker and if you can verbally abuse her the next time you are together. Explain that you want to engage in a fantasy where you call her names because she refuses to send you nudes. Tell her that you understand that It's a hard limit, but that saying things like "you a such a stuck-up cunt who thinks what she has is so precious that she won't trust her master with it" gets you *going*. If she lets you write on her, get a water-basef sharpie and write "[your name]'s pussy" and "[your name]'s other pussy" next to her orifices and use arrows to point to each of them. Then lie down and tell her to squat so that her holes are over your face. Then you can either jerk off or have her blow/stroke you until you come. When you do, make her clean it up with her mouth. Then tell her not to remove the writing and get dressed. And take her out for a night on the town.

Adapt from this freely and ask for her panties at the end of the night. If she gives them to you, congrats...you've got something better than nudes. If she bristles or tell you that what you want makes her uncomfortable, then listen to her and drop it.

It's 2018, bro. Women still want to please men, but there is an entire social movement afoot that makes women feel guilty for doing it. Sex for women is largely about boundary setting and "he respected my boundaries!" is the female version of "I got her in the ass!" Pay attention to what I just wrote and stop controlling her.

Is she open to the miracle of Skype sex?

Basically what you’re saying is don’t recognize your own emotions, live inside the box she has created for you while diminishing your own happiness, because her unwillingness to change is more important than your own needs. Maybe you have to accept the fact you are incompatible, and find a new woman. My wife and I have already had this conversation, I just don’t think she understands I’m already giving significantly. I’m not budging anymore. You sound like a pushover.

user doesn’t want to cheat, but also doesn’t want their current arrangement. Basically, he will find new pussy if she can’t compromise and satisfy his need.

Yep. She just can’t be loyal. Which is why I’m considering a divorce.

I agree with everything you wrote. If you want to fuck a girl in the ass and you have a loving relationship with a "no ansl" girl, I don't see anything wrong with ending the relationship and finding a buttslut. But you and I both know that for the vast majority of men. Options are severely limited. So compromise has to be weighted against reality. That's life.

I agree. You have the proper perspective. I wish my wife would go ass-to-mouth, but It's a hard limit for her...

Literally she is a liar, and trying to manipulate the situation to her own benefit. I won’t compromise my morality, I’ll just move forward. She can continue a broken cycle, I can’t make her change. But nobody will impede my progress.

Instead of believing you are limited, why not think you can have whatever you want and live to make that a reality even if it’s not yet? You are the only person putting limitations on yourself.

Not if it causes her anxiety, dipshit. Anxiety is female for "do not want!"

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I understand her not wanting to do that, even if it’s a want and from what I hear really euphoric (never been lucky enough to experience that), because I also understand it can be somewhat dangerous due to it being unsanitary. But, I also understand there are ways to clean it and make the health risks a lower probability of occurring

Abundance mentality is important, but living in reality is important, as well. I can tell myself "I can have all the anal play I want with my wife!" bit the truth is that my preferences make her uncomfortable and she lets me do a lot that I like that doesn't make her uncomfortable. So I don't get as much anal sex as I like, but It's all good.

Anxiety is universal, not just for women. No is the universal for “do not want”. Anxiety just means the idea or situation makes you uncomfortable

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Still. It scares me when she goes into full rage mode so I just avoid it.
She has my number. She knows where I live. With the amount of power females have today, she could easily ruin my life so I just prefer to talk to her now and again but not everyday.

She acts nice but she secretly hates my guts. I've seen the type of shit she writes about me on the Internet. None of it true. We met on a BDSM chatroom 4 years ago when I was 16. What a predicament.

She's nor interested. She has issues with being forced to do what she does not want. This comes from a previous relationship where a bf forced her to lose weight and she her hair. It's not about me, and forcing her or even arguing the point would strain our relationship.

For sure. Compromise. If you really love her, her wants and feelings should at least be considered equal to your own. I often lean to putting my women’s wants before mine, but if you’re truly equal she would be doing the same for you. If she doesn’t wanna do it though, and gives in every other way, why not bite the bullet?

But women want to please men and feel guilty when they do so outside their boundaries. When soyboys please women, they don't get respect and they feel *used* and *angry*. Male and female anxiety are different, mostly because, when it comes to what will or will not happen in the bedroom, lime it or not, women have all the power.

Don’t live in fear. Let her do what she has to do because ultimately it means she just hates herself and doesn’t want to move forward because that’s the hard part of life. When I’m unhappy, I take the necessary steps to become happy. Life is too short to live in fear. You aren’t guaranteed to wake up tomorrow, so why live knowing you wasted potentially your last day?

Get away from her. Tell her you met someone else. Don't be afraid of your desires and understand that she can't ruin you if you accept that whatever she has on you is private and normal because it is between you. You are the sub in this relationship, and that is not what you want.

You want pics of her to feel powerful, user, so that you can hurt her if she hurts you. Admit this to yourself and then end it. Your relationship seems to be based on sex, and that is a bad deal for both of you.