I am an unemployed (molecular) biologist. Ask me anything

I am an unemployed (molecular) biologist. Ask me anything.

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Why do you keep posting on Sup Forums? No wonder you fucked up your postdoc. Get off the interwebs and go teach junior college, faggot.

Why are You such a failure at life that you paid untold 1000s for a degree that you are doing nothing with? At the least tell me you are working for more than just a bachelor's in it because if not then you really are just wasting space

>Why do you keep posting on Sup Forums?

For fun.

>Get off the interwebs and go teach junior college, faggot.

Teaching position at university level in continental Europe are usually linked to a research position. There are no (or very few) teaching-focused positions like in the US. To teach at schools, you actually need to study pedagogics.

>Why are You such a failure at life that you paid untold 1000s for a degree that you are doing nothing with?

Europe. Didn't pay anything.

>At the least tell me you are working for more than just a bachelor's in it because if not then you really are just wasting space

I have a PhD. There isn't anything beyond that not linked to a faculty position.

How can we get hold of the genetically engineered bacteria or yeast that creates morphine?

You simply aren't trying hard enough then

Do you have enough relevent knowledge and autism to team up with a indie dev and make a biologically accurate fighting game involving guns and sharp shit?

You mean those: nature.com/articles/ncomms10390

Ask the authors and pretend you are a scientist.

I've written hundreds of applications over the last year.

Why don't you go to Amerifat and teach? PhD can easily get work teaching Big Mac Consumption 101 there.

I really want out of academia. I see no future for myself there. Also, pure teaching positions as adjunct or something are a complete shit show.

Just so you know, adjunct professors in 'Merica can attack more 18 year old pussy than chlamydia, easily. What do you do to pay the bills now?

I work half days in a supermarket.

Seriously? You'd rather do that then take some easy job in Amerifat and fuck hundreds of 'Merican teenagers? OK, then :D

BTW, I went to amerifat uni, and even the fat, hideous adjuncts got more pussy than I've seen on the Internet

That's great and all. But spending thousands of dollars moving to the US for a position which oftentimes pays below minimum wage is not great to say the least.

Right on, good luck at the supermarket, then. If you tell them you have a PhD, maybe you can make assistant manager.

I still hope that I will find a place in industry. Pharma, biotech or something like that.

What is this bump on my weiner?

Fordyce spots?

Are you familiar with the dissertation done by Brian "Dexter" Holland?

No. HIV is not what I worked on.

bump

why havent you poisoned half of la with the super aids yet?
>these lazy faggots i tell ya

Not an infectious biologist, no access to a BSL3-4 lab.

youtube.com/watch?v=ze8JE_CzsSo

What was your specific area of study? What did YOU do a dissertation on?

Transcriptomics of adult tissue stem cells.

Make meth make money fuck bitches

>bioLOGist

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how can I roll dubs?

By shitposting as frequent as possible.

bump

Am biologist from Eu, I want to hit on american teens. Tell me more about this adjunct positions

Are you familiar with epigenetics?
Inheritability of histone damage and messed up cell methylations?

Dubs is truth

Of course. Though I mainly did RNA-seq.

Why are most people so fucking stupid?

If waiting every year past puberty to reproduce causes environmental pollution to accumulate epigenetic damage to eventually be inherited by your baby as cancer then couldn't we just cure cancer off the earth by outlawing sex with anybody over 13?

Why don't you make some lucy?

Dunno. Am stupid myself.

Of course not. Most cancers are only influenced partly by hereditary factors (may they be genomic or epigenomic). Accumulation of cellular damage outside the germline plays the largest role.

Do you like Bionicles?

How many papers have you got to your name?

How many are first author?

On 7 papers. 3 as first author.

have you been to any interviews recently? Are you getting any feedback as to why you're not landing a job?

Are you trying industry aslo, or just government grant funded labs?

lastly, are you really trying, like honestly, or are you kind of enjoying the free time? If so, dont take too much time off, and spend it wisely, travel maybe.

were you a post doc, or have you not been able to get a job stright out of your PhD?

what was your last job, and why did it end?

Are there any sort of mnemonic devices or memory tools on learning mitosis and meiosis? The fucking krebs cycle was easier for me to learn that that shit. I know I'm retarded but damn.

Would it prevent cancer deaths?
How many?

I'm a security guard at a university and even I get pussy thrown at me. The first year I was a bitch and didn't do anything for fear of losing my job. Then I just started taking classes so the ones I've fucked either don't know I'm security or think I'm only working to pay for school

>have you been to any interviews recently?

Had some Skype interviews and some assessment centre stuff.

>Are you getting any feedback as to why you're not landing a job?

Nope.

>Are you trying industry aslo, or just government grant funded labs?

Only industry.

>were you a post doc, or have you not been able to get a job stright out of your PhD?

I was a postdoc for two years. Funding ran out and my projects was overall not very successful. After that, I decided to try to leave academia.

Is it possible to create an hybrid animal, just by exchanging chromosomes between species?

how would you define a virus?

Nope. Essential genes would likely get lost, other genes / proteins would not be homologous enough to interact etc.

How can I separate DNA from a fruit?

Some nucleic acid in a shell which borrows the machinery of cells to reproduce.

Break open the cells with mechanical force and / or detergents, then precipitate the DNA with ethanol.

Bruv, just youtube it.
youtube.com/watch?v=etGZS0zapm4

Tide pods and everclear?

Bit of soap.

bump

Is that a rat?

Mouse.

dang I was close

Yeah.

What do you think is the best way to taxonomically separate bacteria?

Whole genome sequencing. Expensive and analysis-heavy though.

okey let me phrase it like this, what do you think is the most resource efficient way of doing it?

If you are talking about de novo classification, WGS is the gold standard. When you are just interested in metagenomically profiling a sample to get a broad view of bacterial setup, go for 16S.

what did you do before you got unemployed?

PhD and postdoc. Mainly transcriptional analysis of stem cells.

Where does fat go when weight is “lost” currently “losing” it

Why can’t. You get a job at Philips Respironics?

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Sounds like it is a needed profession, so why are you not employed? afraid of moving or no papers published?

Fatty acids get reduced by beta oxidation to Acetyl-CoA which is then transformed into energy. The carbon is exhaled as Co2.

35 y old
About to Marry a 18 y old thai godess

AMA

How do you make a horse horny?

>afraid of moving or no papers published?

I'm fine with moving within Western and Northern Europe. And I do have papers published. It's just that the market is completely oversaturated with PhDs.

bump

Do you think that ATP synthase is made by evoution?

Yes.

Are you familiar with the Euraxess portal?

What do you know about the activity of 2,2-Dimethyl-2,3-dihydro-1-benzofuran-7-yl methylcarbamate in humans, in particular, would you consider it to be a reversible or non-reversible cholinesterase inhibitor?

And why do you think it has been found all over Salisbury?

Yes.

No idea.

Drive for Lyft, fuck it. When people ask just tell your about your schooling, or grow magic mushrooms. My question is are you broke? Does your country provide any services or aid for you in this time in your life? Not trolling, would honestly like to know.

Did you enjoy research? Or would you do a more employable degree if you could go back in time?

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Kek

No idea? wow .. OK ... let's try something easier.

Can you identify at least 3 novel uses of the luciferase enzyme, apart from the obvious naturally occurring presentations. Hint: there was a paper in Nature within the last 12 months by a well-known Finnish professor using luciferase as a tagging enzyme for a very novel purpose.

You need a chill pill amigo. Are you that Finnish scientist fag?

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