Oldfags give youngfags advice based on mistakes / past experiences

>oldfags give youngfags advice based on mistakes / past experiences

General life tips

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just stay inside and don't answer the door for nobody

Never trust other people.

A lot of places offer some type of free something on your birthday. Spend a few hours signing up to the websites and you can generally eat for free for a good two weeks.

love and sex are overrated, but only when you have both

living for yourself is a tough trick for a lot of people, but indulging yourself too much can definitely lead to sociopathy and loneliness.

everything in moderation. for all the vices, this is true. everybody I know abuses one vice too much but wont admit it, including me.

For the love of god don't stay on Sup Forums!

bruh it's my bday today

Lower your standards, fuck anything

How do i start talking to girls in my class?
I have been in the same class for almost a year, i just come in do my shit and leave, how do i start up a conversation with the girls there?

Or any girl tips in general since i'm inept i relationships in general.

26 year old fag here, not that old but wish I could go back

>start lifting, go to a gym and eat clean, it's the best decision you can make
>go talk with that girl, I've only had one gf and now that I am 26 I can barely speak with girls and see no future
>get into university, don't fall for the "work a couple of years" meme
>stop browsing Sup Forums, become popular on instagram or another actually good social network instead
>become independent, this doesn't mean you have to move out of your parent's house, just make some money so you can afford stuff you want.

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Stop being a bitch and converse with them

any advice for taking a girls virginity? ive been with my gf for a month but shes a virgin. we've done everything except p in vagee. what do?

bruh google free birthday deals and see what offers are around you

Don't call yourself an oldfag, newfag

sit next to the girl you like, talk about school projects and share food with her

the best way to form a relationship with someone is to do this, almost all animals form bonds if they eat together

He didnt you fucking moron, learn to read or fucking hang yourself.

Guys in college, don't smoke weed on a regular basis. Just try it and move on, please.

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dont fuck with any type of opiates. ever.

>don't answer the door for nobody

But do answer the door for anybody

It's ok to cheat. Make your experiences. Just stay safe and always use protection.

putting your libido aside will leave you free to think about how to appeal to her more, or dwell on what she has to offer versus other girls. Dwell on just how long you want to put up with her, after identifying the baggage of course. dwell on what your future would truly be like, cuz once you pop this one she'll cling like a dryer sheet.

But smack is so Moorish

Fuck off plebbit

Well im not the one struggling with a text based forum, you fucking 9gager. End it. You know you want to

I can't, fixed sits and i'm sitting next to a dude, more tips?

>oldfag here, i'm 33 & i'm drunk


Get a degree in some shit. nothing worse than some bitch looking down on you for whatever you give a fuck about.

DO NOT GET MARRIED!!!

tell the teacher you can't see shit and need to move or make a shit-ton of mess with this dude so that the teacher has to change your seat

This.

1. Dont believe the hype.
2. Dont work too hard or you'll have to pick up other peoples slack in their jobs.
3. Go outside atleast once a day and look around for changes, it gives rise to alot of ideas and chances for conversation with others
4. People are selfish, dont give them the opportunity to be that way.
5. Dont expect anyone to love or respect you, if you cant love or respect the person you are, both of this things must also be earned.

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Wrong, I'm the hacker known as Ebaumsworld
Don't make me get the exploding van

This nigger should be our leader.

If you aren't feeling as good from a substance, stop taking that substance. I've seen this go badly too many times.

C's get degrees. Don't worry so much about your marks unless you specifically want to become a PhD or Master of something. Even then, what matters are your connexions, publications, and professional/academic references. Build your network. I effectively axed my whole academic career path through not paying any attention to building a network. I always get the interview, I never get the job. Their advice is just "get references," like I'm a magician who can afford to take another four years of school on my own dime.

I fucking dare you...

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>text based forum
It’s an image board

When in doubt, whip it out.

With words

1) you can love your job but it will never ever love you back, never ever

2) if you engage with the police, you already lost; if you go to court, you already lost

3) make sure you are your own advocate, because the HR department is not on your side, your doctor is not on your side, your lawyer is only on your side as long as you pay them

4) debate is a waste of time, because ignorance and prejudice is more powerful than facts and evidence by an order of magnitude

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No its not faggot

>become popular on instagram or another actually good social network instead

Why?

Congrats, you are spending your b-day on Sup Forums.
Pro/Oldfag advice:
>don't

Some people are manipulative and crazy. Make sure that new girl you met is who she says she is. Make sure she has some self control - no maxed out credit cards.

Oh, and if they say they are on the pill, don't believe it. Could be a trap to get you to marry them so they can spend all your money.

I've been struggling with depression for a long time and the longer I live the more I feel like dying. I don't have enough money to get help anymore, and my Healthcare is really awful. I make too much to get any assistance, but I can't afford the doctor's visits on top of the medication. I feel like the only thing that helps is drugs, but they are pretty much the only source of happiness in my life. I have a fiance and a good family, but I still don't feel happy. I feel like I never will.

Am married, can confirm

>eat clean
When you're really young it doesn't do much, but what you eat can quickly have a big influence especially with a bit of age. Eat a heavy meal in the evening and you might find it much more difficult to get up, or if you eat too late. Skip breakfast and you'll feel tired not only in the morning, but after the energy from the first meal drops. So eating properly can have a huge influence on your whole life. The same goes with exercise.

>go talk with that girl
I spent years worrying about what I should do to pick up chicks rather than just going for it. All it took was making my intentions obvious, going on dates, kissing her when the moment comes. I don't regret waiting for it, but I do regret all of the bitterness I had because of the constant failures.

>get into university
That isn't for everyone though. I've seen people kill themselves at university because everyone told them it was the best option, when it just wasn't for them and they hated both the studies and the job that followed. Just be sure you know what you really want.

>become popular
Utterly pointless. If you're not very good at it, you'll just be fighting against the current. Just accept you aren't sociable and make sure to keep a few good friends.

>become independent
Extremely fucking important. I kept letting my mother do everything for me, and later realized I couldn't do anything on my own.

Read the fourth point this guy made

>>go talk with that girl
>I spent years worrying about what I should do to pick up chicks rather than just going for it. All it took was making my intentions obvious, going on dates, kissing her when the moment comes. I don't regret waiting for it, but I do regret all of the bitterness I had because of the constant failures.

Wanna give me some more tips in this area?

>so Moorish

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Do not surpress or try to escape your feelings. If you paralyse sadness, you also cut off happiness and become a zombie.

Lift.

Remove instant gratification as much as possible, everything is sweeter when it's rarely tasted.

Women aren't too difficult to get, you just have to not smell like shit and find the balance between being nice and being cold. Most women want a guy who she feels safe walking down the street with, but also treats her nicely. Don't ever be a push over, don't ever be desperate and never show your inner little bitch. She might say she doesn't care, but she does. It's biology, can't fuck with that.

Be open, unless you're very good looking or very charismatic, if you're average or ugly or socially inept, trying to play the mystery man will come off creepy, and most people prefer openness even if they don't like some of the things they here.

Push yourself out of your comfort zone and aim to over come one fear a week. Anxiety is a product of constantly living in a society that holds your hand and let's you retreat and stay where you feel safe. The only way to become confident is to overcome fears until there's nothing left to worry about.

Have a fist fight every now and again even if it's a friendly match with a friend. It's important for men to stay connected to their masculinity if they want better women and to be respected by other real men.

Don't do drugs. If you take the gamble with your mind you can end up mentally retarded and sometimes not even realise it. You could be a spastic now and not be aware.

Stop agreeing with people just to be friendly, people respect you more when you don't lick ass.

Get a job. Structure of life and sense of purpose combat depression and money gives more opportunities to do new things and meet new people.

Keep in touch with all useful people you know. You never know when you might need to call in a favour.

Thibk positive. Be your own best friend.

It is tho

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This is a fact.

Unless your degree is in a field that requires a specific GPA as an employment threshold, find a better balance.

I graduated with. 2.5 avg GPA. I’ve been working non stop in my industry since graduation and I make 6 figures a year.

Major?

contribooting

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Don't smoke dabs.

Don't fap to traps
Don't wear your gf panties
Once you're a fag never come back

>Once you're a fag never come back
>on Sup Forums

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-Learn oral sex/using fingers for orgasms
-Get a degree in something. Better to say "I have this training" in something that looks unrelated than nothing. Easy to make parallels for job interviews and some skill translate
-Learn how to negociate your salary (google it)
-Being with someone makes life easier. Paying for shit when there's 2 of you is easier. Getting through shit with someone also.
-Talking helps sometimes. Doing something about problems always does, even if you're wrong. Experience means failing many times. Doing nothing never helps.
-Love requires boundaries. Put em up at the start and ask for his/hers. Compromise and it'll work out
-If you think life owes you something, you're wrong. Our ancestors had to hunt and plant shit months in advance in order to hope to live to 30 years old. Why wouldn't you need to do something? Better working a shitty job than having to compete with a bear for food.
-Have a project. They'll give you purpose when there are none and you'll have something to remind you you're not an useless piece of shit when everything else if going badly.
-Keep your friends. Making new friends past high school is fucking hard
-Look on google for a bunch of shit. How to deal with depression, make friends, perform oral sex, repair your cellphone. Whatever it is, you'll always get something out of it.
-Most people don't give a shit about you. Do what you love, be who you are, do what you want to do. Ater all, humanity is just a mildly complex system of cells hitching a ride on a rotating ball in the void of space. Life does not matter, live the shit out of it.

My day today too! Turned 35.

I´m really not an oldfag but my advice is to not fuck crazy bitches. I´m 18 and i fucked a 30 year old brazilian woman and while it was nice it also became very annoying. Breaking up was hard because it´s like the bitch didn´t want to hear what i was saying.

Being single is a lot better than being in a relationship with someone you don´t like.

Happy birthday man! i'm only 21, got some tips for me?

Wise words

I'm 20, in college doing engineering. I hate it. I wanna do languages instead. should I just drop out and change or just stick with this?

Try online first. See what works and what doesnt, then move on to 3d girls

Talk to them, try to be a funny person, if they seem interested get their snapchats and if they don´t you move on who gives a fuck.

Work a job you love and you never work a day in your life. If this career path is not making you happy, change it immediately, you've got the options now you're young to find that golden job so don't waste it and spend the rest of your life dreading work in the morning. You'll become depressed.

It's such a shame, I really only picked engineering because it's a high paying job field and then i started studying thai and irish in my spare time which I enjoy and click with a hell of a lot more that fucking d'alembert's theorem, archimedes principle and shitty autoCAD

>living alone can lead to sociopathy

Are you fucking 10?

Don't be a nice guy, it gets you nowhere good.

Trust and respect are earned not blindly given.
Be kind to people, you never know whats going on in their lives.
Volunteer. Serve at a soup kitchen, help old ladies run their church book fair. Doing something for someone that cant pay you back is incredibly rewarding.
Find some hobbies that have you interacting with strangers. Take music lessons or an improv class. Take a weekend dog walking job to land bitches w/e

Im old and have failed a lot in life ama i guess.

That's just wrong be a nice guy but don't be a bitch

That's why you shouldn't go to college straight from highschool. Work a while, try being a person.

Correct

i did, i left school at 16, worked full time for 4 years.

>"The funny thing about regret is that it is better to regret something you have done, than something you have not done." -Butthole Surfers "sweatloaf"

This is a great truth. Other great truths: always cover your ass. Coworkers and others will screw you if given a chance - let them try but have that back up read. All jobs suck. This is why it is called a job or work. However, there is no better way to make money. Learn about money and how it functions, invest in stocks and other financial vehicles.

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And you're still a loser?

>thinking only of yourself and never others can lead to sociopathy
Nigger can you read

is this a threat or not?

its a demonstration but that nibber still blew

nope

Engineer here. Are you getting ok grades or struggling to pass? Working as an engineer is nothing like school.

>Bitching in an advice thread
>learning irish
>not a loser

get out on your own asap. I left home at 17, stop being basement faggots at your parents house

Yup decent grades. I'm not failing anything but i'm not excelling in anything

what am i bitching about?

Hello young fags allow me to pass on info I would to my younger self.

-Discipline yourself. Get a diary, keep notes of tasks to complete and tick them off.
-Buy property as early as you can.
-Make the right kind of contacts and cut yourself off from negative people even if you love them.
-Don't get married. Don't have kids (contentious but true)
-There is never a time that your appearance does'nt matter. Maintain physique and clothing.
-Work hard but schedule time for quality R&R, it will pay for itself.
-Create as many opportunities as you can, 5% success rate is more than nothing that you would have gotten otherwise.
-You ALL need a 2nd stream of income and a plan B.
Goodluck younglings, escape your tweens and become actual adults.

>become popular on instagram or another actually good social network

So do nothing then. Cool.

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>
>It's such a shame, I really only picked engineering because (blah blah blah) that fucking d'alembert's theorem, archimedes principle and shitty autoCAD


>what am i bitching about?
A lot faggot

k

ITT: Reddit

Did i touch a nerve darling?

yes

never underestimate the power of
"if I only believed those advices when I was younger, now I'm older and give the same advice to younger people who don't believe"
-vintage 1968

Maybe you should be leas of a loser then.

ok

- Don't allow yourself to be exploited in work, love, family, etc.

- if you have anxiety, low self esteem or plain depression 10 minutes of a daily routine workout / day can improve your mood a lot, just buy the cheapest multi-weight dumbbells and multi-chord chest-expander out there, combined with squats, push-ups and other basic exercises can work wonders if you are too anxious for others to see you exercise / running

- if you're a smoker (must want to quit) give it a try for e-cigs with nicotine, aim in the middle price-range, you'll feel better in a couple of days and after that even if you try a normal cig it will feel like you're poring lava in your lungs.

- learn basic grooming and self-care, a little effort in this area can go a long way in your first impression with everyone new you meet

- don't be afraid to keep your Likdedin and other job sites updated and apply from time to time, you never know when a random opportunity appears, also, how you look in the picture matter more than HR likes to admit

- read read read, it will improve your imagination and creativity as you have to recreate entire worlds in your head, pretty much everyone goes south with creativity after they hit 25 and e-books make a very fine comute-companion.

- try to have high standards only for a few things in life and thoroughly enjoy those (ex: audophile gear, car modding, etc) if you have high standards for everything you will be forever displeased

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>Your co-workers are not your friends. They'll be friendly, and you may go out and do stuff with them, but don't forget that if it comes down to a situation in the workplace in which you or they will lose your job, they will almost guarantee to throw you under the bus.

>Work your ass off at whatever job you have. Come in early and stay late. Take extra hours. If you aren't making more money after a year, seek another job with a slightly higher salary. Never leave a job for one with a lower salary. Constantly develop your skill set, continue improving yourself.

>Save money, even if it's just a dollar a day.

>Clean your fucking room.

I can.

Basically you need to figure out what you want, be it something serious or not. Then, what really matters is just trying your luck and knowing when you're really supposed to give up. I used to fuck up both.

I think the most important thing to figure out is that women aren't that complicated. If they like you they'll enjoy interacting with you. They'll enjoy hearing from you, they'll actually hold a conversation. They're happy to go on dates with you. Dates should be fun and personal, but the first ones should be simple like grabbing a drink in some cafe. Later on you should find something that she would like and go do it. If she likes you she'll allow you to reach that point. Once you're having intimate dates it's all about finding the right moment to kiss her.

The issue I had was that I'd be trying to figure out subtle hints and all, when them liking me was obvious as fuck. Even on intimate dates I'd never go for the kiss and they just thought I wanted to be friends. When they weren't into going on dates, I'd waste months trying to reach that point.

Basically you have to just not overthink anything. If she says no for a date but suggests some other time, it's all good. If she just doesn't bother, don't bother either.

If you have more questions just ask.

I got a few.
Dont be a mopey cunt in social situations, even if you feel ill at ease and you're not really happy. Fake it. Smile and laugh and dont be a glum asshole. Smile, laugh, and be positive about everything. People will actually like you. Nobody likes cunts, so dont be one.

Dont trust women. Even when they're married, living in a big house with an infant baby with their new husband they will pursue other men. I know because i interact with these bitches often. Its ridiculous how bad women have gotten as of late. after 30 they because psycho's looking for reasurance or whatever, do not ever enter a relationship with a girl you actually like and would regret losing.
The only chance you have if you get someone you dislike, because only then will she not have total control over you and get bored.

Get a hobby you like. Doesnt matter what it is, just do "something".

Eat right and exercise. Its not that hard, just shy of an hour 4 times a week, just controll what you eat and make sure its not total fucking shit and add vegetables. You dont have to look like a pro bodybuilder or some retarded asshat from /fit/ with full blown body dysmorphia to look good. a V shaped uper body where your chest extends further than your gut does not take long to achieve (unless you're obese). and dont skimp on cardio because "muh gains".

Treat your job like a roleplaying game where you actually try to gain experience point and level up to become better at it. It will pay off in nearly any career/job there is. Either with promotions or the confidence boost being the best provides.

Practice making eye contact until you're not a flinching faggot. People will feel you are submissive if you dart around and it will lead to them not respecting you, either conciously or subconciously. Eye contact is very important.

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Half the shit on this list is because you obsess over what other people are thinking of you. The best way to earn people's respect is to flat out not give a fuck. It becomes exceedingly obvious when you primp and preen trying to create this controlled image that you project to everyone else.

Yes.

1. Wake up early to stretch and do light exercise. At lest 2 hours before you have to leace your house for work or school.

2. Never let anyone intimidate you. It doesn't mean be a pompous prick. When you start feeling assertive people notice.

3. Everyone is not your friend. Evaluate relationships and only keep only quality individuals who provide stability.

4. Find a woman who devotes her self to you but also takes time for herself. Never let her disrespect you or vice versa.

5. The last point, don't over use alcohol. I personally have a hard time with rule #5.
I drink only beer on the weekends but i tend to get pretty buzzed every time.