HELP ME GET BITCHES ON TINDER, BITCHES

HELP ME GET BITCHES ON TINDER, BITCHES

imgur.com/a/dV94v

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Get a new hairstyle

Show us your matches and we'll be able to guide you

caleb is a boring ass white af name

Not witty enough.
You've got to have nothing but sexual innuendo and memes in the bio.

I've got ZERO MATCHES BITCHESSSS

Okay what should I put then? Guide me with your wisdom, great one

Your profile should be something like - I'm the Negan of my school. Even the teachers are scared of me, so you should know I'm really really dangerous. I love all the popular music, watching big bang theory (how funny is Sheldor?) and talking to sweet chicks.
21
Big penus
Cool
Reddit
The Donald
Alt right
Scared of black people.

Kek. Roll for this

mention your truck too and you got it all covered

ROLL

youtube.com/watch?v=lY8rzo4Ik4M

just don't bother

This op

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Nigga you are not going to get any bitches with that Fred lookin' ass face, go and make your youtube channel with sped up shit on each clip

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>let me pet your pet
>I like to hang out on the bus
>reference to zombies

You are beyond any help.

Why do you rip off mass effect so much in your artwork?

Have you got any pictures of you punching a dog or small woman? That shit is bitch bait

Rollin

Cut your hair you twink shit

If I was any less gay I'd fuck you. Does that mean that girls aren't gay either?

Also, stop taking gay ass selfies. Your pictures and bio are equivalent to a chick on tinder. Act and look more like a guy, I don't know what else to tell you

roll

Alright my dudes. Initiate "The Roasting Part 2: Judgement Day"

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>look i play guitar

100% faggot

Just change your profile to this

Look less like a child

But bitches love guitar

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You look Squall from Final Fantasy 8 if he had a severe case of autism and was ugly.

look into the camera on ur pictures u fuckin faggot

Damn that's savage bro. You fuckin got me

Looking at the camera is being attractive

Just go on grindr, im gay and id fuck you so hard your anus would look like a yawning hippo OP

Oh gosh

tbf you have that faggy twinky look, you'd definitely do well in the gay community, get a lot more attention that cunty women

It's weird when I see people with my name, calebs are always giant pieces of shit or the chillest guys you'll ever meet.

Is that normal to dichotomize people with your name? Is that how Michaels feel about other mikes?

Yeah I tried the gay thing for awhile but it's not really for me. Really wasn't a fan of how a lot of dudes treated me and I didn't get the kind of emotional support I expected from a relationship

It's true. Caleb's are always gigantic ass faggots are quiet chill Bros. There is no in between

Unironically become a National Socalist for like 6 months. Thats how I met my wife 2 years ago

lemme butt fuck you my dude

Haha what if I wore gay cat makeup

Like as a joke haha

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Sides are exploded

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bring that ass here maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaan!
where do you live my guy?

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Clearly ment to take the D, but you're on tinder. Denial is cancerous dude

take some hormones. you'd make a cute grill.

>tinder gold masterrace

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no more than one selfie, it’s kind of a girlie thing if all of your profile pix are selfies. find other pix instead. for bio write “swipe right for free pizza

most girls will message you first asking for their pizza. works like a charm.

Seattle

I tried dudes. I just like girls more. Plus It's too much to work to try and look like one

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Damn, maximum jelly

Step 1: Develop an authentic identity
Step 2: ????
Step 3: Profit

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Bitches love guitar though. But don't pick up guitar just to get girls. Makes you look like a desperate beta faggot.

>I tried dudes
lets try it again. you might get it right this time.
>Plus It's too much to work to try and look like one
you look like a bitch by default tho. even without the makeup i feel the desire to french kiss you

denial

>21
>white boy
>no car
>no profession (even if job)
>fashion of a young dweeb

you ain't getting laid for a while mang.

nah all black dudes are getting laid either my man. a very small fraction of them even get to taste the bitter-sweet nectar of a females puss.

Why do you just assume I don't have a car?

have you had your prostate stimulated yet bruh?

Yeah, the dude gave up right when I was about to finish

Change your picture so you dont look like a 15 year old emo girl cutely shyly smirking

you had once bad experience. do you have kik/snap/discord?

THATS JUST WHAT MY FACE LOOKS LIKE, DAMMIT

Why not. I'll probably stop responding to you at some point though, it's nothing personal

Discord is Sigma#2804

Sorry, the bitches option is not aviable in beta version

CHARGE YOUR PHONE NIGGA

IM TRYIN BITCH

you are really cute, if you were gay I would fuck you

This is my fuckin problem. I only appeal to gay dudes

thats because you look really cute, thats not what those bitches want, I'm afraid

What am I supposed to do then? I don't wanna bulk up, I'd look ridiculous. I run three miles on the treadmill every day and I'm just gonna get more lean

I'm not the person to ask for that, as you see Im gay and have absolutely no experience in what girls want for a man.

Lol that makes sense

Thanks anyways for the compliments my dude

loco, eres blanco y cob apariencia de beta, has tenido novia? sinceramente pareces un maricon

I've had several girlfriends you faggot spic. Learn English motherfucker

you're welcome Sup Forumsrother

Am I the only one who actually puts information about themselves on Bumble or Tindr? Like wtf

stop saying bitchesssss

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BITCH

This picture fills me with dread